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Funny Thinks Quotes
Funny Quotes about Thinks

Let these funny Thinks Quotes from my large collection of funny quotes about life add a little humor to your day.

Life is a mirror, and will reflect back
to the thinker what he thinks into it.
- Ernest Holmes

It's not as great a day for the bride as she thinks.
She's not marrying the best man.
- Anonymous

Anyone who thinks sitting in church
can make you a Christian must also think
that sitting in a garage can make you a car.
- Garrison Keillor

Strike an average between what a woman thinks of her husband
a month before she marries him
and what she thinks of him a year afterward,
and you will have the truth about him.
- H. L. Mencken


 

Every man thinks God is on his side.
- Jean Anouilh

A true friend is someone who
thinks that you are a good egg
even though he knows that
you are slightly cracked.
- Bernard Meltzer

Everyone thinks of changing the world,
but no one thinks of changing himself.
- Leo Tolstoy


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We know what a person thinks not when he tells us
what he thinks, but by his actions.
- Isaac Bashevis Singe

People do not like to think.
If one thinks, one must reach conclusions.
Conclusions are not always pleasant.
- Helen Keller

The man who can't dance thinks the band is no good.
- Polish Proverb

Anyone who thinks there's safety in numbers hasn't
looked at the stock market pages.
- Irene Peter

It is what a man thinks of himself
that really determines his fate.
- Henry David Thoreau

A man should look for what is,
and not for what he thinks should be.
- Albert Einstein

If someone thinks that love and peace is a cliche
that must have been left behind in the Sixties,
that's his problem. Love and peace are eternal.
- John Lennon

A man is but the product of his thoughts -
what he thinks, he becomes.
- Mohandas (Mahatma) Gandhi

An educated man is thoroughly inoculated against humbug,
thinks for himself and tries to give his thoughts,
in speech or on paper, some style.
- Alan K. Simpson

A man is what he thinks about all day long.
- Ralph Waldo Emerson

Part of me suspects that I'm a loser,
and the other part of me thinks I'm God Almighty.
- John Lennon

As long as any adult thinks that he,
like the parents and teachers of old,
can become introspective,
invoking his own youth to understand
the youth before him,
he is lost.
- Margaret Mead

My mother thinks I could have even run a larger company.
- Christie Hefner

Anyone who thinks, must think of
the next war as they would of suicide.
- Eleanor Roosevelt

Someone who thinks the world is always cheating him is right.
He is missing that wonderful feeling of trust in someone or something.
- Eric Hoffer

The work of art shows people new directions and thinks of the future.
The house thinks of the present.
- Adolf Loos

Imagine if every Thursday your shoes exploded if you tied them the usual way.
This happens to us all the time with computers,
and nobody thinks of complaining.
- Jef Raskin

Anybody who thinks money will make you happy,
hasn't got money.
- David Geffen

It isn't tying himself to one woman that a man dreads
when he thinks of marrying;
it's separating himself from all the others.
- Helen Rowland

People think of the inventor as a screwball,
but no one ever asks the inventor what he thinks of other people.
- Charles Kettering

God sleeps in the minerals, awakens in plants,
walks in animals, and thinks in man.
- Arthur Young

I busted a mirror and got seven years bad luck,
but my lawyer thinks he can get me five.
- Steven Wright

It is impossible to begin to learn
that which one thinks one already knows.
- Epictetus

We like a man to come right out and say what he thinks-
if we agree with him.
- Mark Twain

He is able who thinks he is able.
- The Buddha

A woman who thinks she is intelligent demands the same rights as man.
An intelligent woman gives up.
- Sidonie Gabrielle Colette

Think left and think right and think low and think high.
Oh, the thinks you can think up if only you try!
- Dr. Seuss

A conservative is a man who just sits and thinks,
mostly sits.
- Woodrow Wilson

War is an ugly thing, but not the ugliest of things.
The decayed and degraded state of moral and patriotic
feeling which thinks that nothing is worth war is much worse.
- John Stuart Mill

Everyone thinks they're going to write one book of poems or one novel.
- Marilyn Hacker

The problem of how we finance the welfare state should
not obscure a separate issue:
if each person thinks he has an inalienable right to welfare,
no matter what happens to the world,
that's not equity,
it's just creating a society where you can't ask anything of people.
- Jacques Delors

If you think you are beaten, you are.
If you think you dare not, you don't.
If you'd like to win, but think you can't
It's almost a cinch you won't.
Life's battles don't always go to the stronger or faster man;
But soon or late the man who wins is the one who thinks he can.
- Anonymous

Naturally, every age thinks that all ages before it were prejudiced,
and today we think this more than ever, and are just as wrong
as all previous ages that thought so.
How often have we not seen the truth condemned!
It is sad but unfortunately true that man learns nothing from history.
- Carl Jung

Anyone who thinks the art of conversation is dead ought
to tell a child to go to bed.
- Robert C. Gallagher

Whoever thinks his friend more important than his country,
I rate him nowhere.
- Sophocles

Everyone thinks of God as a man - you can't help it -
Santa Claus was a man,
therefore God has to be a man.
- Patti Smith

The Dalai Lama said that he thinks mother's love is
the best symbol for love and compassion,
because it is totally disinterested.
- Richard Gere

A lost battle is a battle one thinks one has lost.
- Jean-Paul Sartre

One must live the way one thinks or end up thinking the way one has lived.
- Paul Bourget

A man thinks that by mouthing hard words he understands hard things.
- Herman Melville

All you have to do is to look like crap on film and
everyone thinks you're a brilliant actress.
Actually, all you've done is look like crap.
- Helen Mirren

I don't think anybody who looks carefully at us thinks
that we are a left-wing or a right-wing organization.
- Peter Jennings

Everyone thinks acting is easy.
It's far from easy, but it's the most gratifying thing I do.
- Eli Wallach

What I think and what the world thinks is totally different.
- Paul Prudhomme

Anyone who thinks they're sexy needs their head checked.
- Jarvis Cocker

Shirley Valentine is a beautiful character and so well written.
What Shirley speaks and thinks is so logical.
- Loretta Swit

Almost everyone thinks they are a good person,
but the question you should be asking is,
am I good enough to go to Heaven? How would you know?
- Candace Cameron

I get cassettes near Academy Award time of every movie
that's made that thinks it has some kind of chance for a nomination -
that's when I watch my movies.
- William Peter Blatty

When a high-profile personality lives like I do,
everybody thinks that person is fated to die young.
- Dennis Rodman

A consistent thinker is a thoughtless person,
because he conforms to a pattern; he repeats phrases and thinks in a groove.
- Jiddu Krishnamurti

Nobody thinks in terms of human beings.
Governments don't, why should we? They talk about people and the proletariat;
I talk about the suckers and the mugs.
It's the same thing.
- Graham Greene

The thing that's funny is that everyone thinks I'm dead.
- Charles Nelson Reilly

Jonny doesn't want to do TV interviews because he thinks
that he comes across as an idiot.
- Colin Greenwood

The real composer thinks about his work the whole time;
he is not always conscious of this,
but he is aware of it later when he suddenly knows what he will do.
- Igor Stravinsky

A high-brow is someone who looks at a sausage and thinks of Picasso.
- A. P. Herbert

The secular world is more spiritual than it thinks,
just as the ecclesiastical world is more materialist
than it cares to acknowledge.
- Lionel Blue

When all men think alike, no one thinks very much.
- Walter Lippmann

The best augury of a man's success in his profession
is that he thinks it the finest in the world.
- George Eliot

It's what a fellow thinks he knows that hurts him.
- Kin Hubbard

Let your tongue speak what your heart thinks.
- Davy Crockett

Everybody thinks that this civilization has lasted
a very long time but it really does take very few grandfathers'
granddaughters to take us back to the dark ages.
- Gertrude Stein

I have written too much history to have faith in it;
and if anyone thinks I'm wrong,
I am inclined to agree with him.
- Henry Adams

Every soldier thinks something of the moral aspects of what he is doing.
But all war is immoral and if you let that bother you,
you're not a good soldier.
- Curtis Lemay

When I want to know what France thinks,
I ask myself.
- Charles de Gaulle


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