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Funny Talk Quotes
Funny Quotes about Talk

Let these funny Talk Quotes from my large collection of funny quotes about life add a little humor to your day.

You know what? Maybe there's a good reason
donkeys shouldn't talk.
- the movie Shrek (2001)

I cannot sing, dance or act; what else would I be but a talk show host.
- David Letterman

Everyone should have at least two friends -
one to talk to and one to talk about.
- Anonymous

I would talk in iambic pentameter if it were easier.
- Howard Nemerov


 

Life is far too important a thing
ever to talk seriously about.
- Oscar Wilde

Talk doesn't cook rice.
- Chinese Proverb

"The time has come," the walrus said, "to talk of many things:
of shoes and ships - and sealing wax - of cabbages and kings."
- Lewis Carroll


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The reason I talk to myself is because
I'm the only one whose answers I accept.
- George Carlin

Might I perhaps win my wings?
I've been waiting for over 200 years now, sir,
and people ARE beginning to talk.
- It's a Wonderful Life (1946 movie)

Children, cartoon animals, comedians,
and space aliens can get away with saying
what the rest of us are afraid is true,
but are embarrassed to talk about.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie

I hear many people talk about their longing for a balanced life.
What I think they are really expressing
is a desire for a life with less pressure.
- Mary Anne Radmacher

It is more fun to talk with someone who doesn't use long, difficult words
but rather short, easy words like "What about lunch?"
- A. A. Milne (Winnie-The-Pooh)

Talk is cheap - except when Congress does it.
- Cullen Hightower

If you love it enough, anything will talk with you.
- George Washington Carver

To hear some men talk of the government,
you would suppose that Congress was the law of gravitation,
and kept the planets in their places.
- Wendell Phillips

Little do men perceive what solitude is,
and how far it extendeth.
For a crowd is not company,
and faces are but a gallery of pictures,
and talk but a tinkling cymbal,
where there is no love.
- Francis Bacon

The left dismisses talk about the collapse of family
life and talks instead about the emergence of the growing
new diversity of family types.
- Christopher Lasch

I challenge you to make your life a masterpiece.
I challenge you to join the ranks of those people
who live what they teach, who walk their talk.
- Tony Robbins

I could talk food all day.
I love good food.
- Tom Brady

I sometimes talk about the making of a poem within the poem.
- Howard Nemerov

There are things that you cannot talk to your mother and father about,
there are things that you cannot talk to your children about.
- Shirley Knight

When we talk about democracy, if the people's
stomach is empty, democracy is also empty.
Democracy can not be installed by fiat;
it must be achieved by the people themselves.
- Jimmy Yen

I'm always rather nervous about how you talk
about women who are active in politics,
whether they want to be talked about as women or as politicians.
- John F. Kennedy

I'm very girly.
I love to talk about diets, exercise,
kids, make-up.
- Rachel Hunter

All this talk about equality.
The only thing people really have in common is that
they are all going to die.
- Bob Dylan

It isn't enough to talk about peace.
One must believe in it.
And it isn't enough to believe in it.
One must work at it.
- Eleanor Roosevelt

Children are educated by what the grown-up is
and not by his talk.
- Carl Jung

Relentless, repetitive self talk is what changes our self-image.
- Denis Waitley

I'm afraid I talk a lot, too much, perhaps.
I should have been a lawyer or a college professor or a windy politician,
though I'm glad I am not any of these.
- Tom Glazer

Talk not of wasted affection;
affection never was wasted.
- Henry Wadsworth Longfellow

The less food, the more time to talk,
the more to talk about.
- Damon Wayans

Don't talk about what you have done
or what you are going to do.
- Thomas Jefferson

If you talk to a man in a language he understands,
that goes to his head.
If you talk to him in his language,
that goes to his heart.
- Nelson Mandela

Men talk of killing time, while time quietly kills them.
- Dion Boucicault

If American men are obsessed with money,
American women are obsessed with weight.
The men talk of gain, the women talk of loss,
and I do not know which talk is the more boring.
- Marya Mannes

You talk about German technocracy and you get automobiles.
- Gordon Sinclair

Writers write.
Dreamers talk about it.
- Jerry B. Jenkins

Talk not of the river or lake
To those who have looked on the sea.
- Ella Wheeler Wilcox

The best morale exist when you never hear the word mentioned.
When you hear a lot of talk about it, it's usually lousy.
- Dwight D. Eisenhower

Who's a boy gonna talk to if not his mother?
- Donald E. Westlake

Patriots always talk of dying for their country and
never of killing for their country.
- Bertrand Russell

Sometimes it's a form of love just to talk to somebody
that you have nothing in common with and still be fascinated by their presence.
- David Byrne

Tis the privilege of friendship to talk nonsense,
and have her nonsense respected.
- Charles Lamb

It is madness for sheep to talk peace with a wolf.
- Thomas Fuller

Wisdom is the reward you get for a lifetime of listening
when you'd have preferred to talk.
- Doug Larson

There's three things men always talk about -
women,
sports, and cars.
- Mario Lopez

There was endless action - not just football,
but sailboats, tennis and other things:
movement.
There was endless talk - the ambassador at the head
of the table laying out the prevailing wisdom,
but everyone else weighing in with their opinions and taking part.
- Charles Spalding

I've made an odd discovery.
Every time I talk to a savant I feel quite sure that
happiness is no longer a possibility.
Yet when I talk with my gardener, I'm convinced of the opposite.
- Bertrand Russell

Anything will give up its secrets if you love it enough.
Not only have I found that when I talk to the little flower
or to the little peanut they will give up their secrets,
but I have found that when I silently commune with people
they give up their secrets also - if you love them enough.
- George Washington Carver

Being a teenager is an amazing time and a hard time.
It's when you make your best friends -
I have girls who will never leave my heart and I still talk to.
You get the best and the worst as a teen.
You have the best friendships and the worst heartbreaks.
- Sophia Bush

Beauty is only skin deep.
If you go after someone just because she's beautiful
but don't have anything to talk about,
it's going to get boring fast.
You want to look beyond the surface and see if you
can have fun or if you have anything in common with this person.
- Amanda Peet

If the present Congress errs in too much talking,
how can it be otherwise in a body to which the people
send one hundred and fifty lawyers,
whose trade it is to question everything,
yield nothing, and talk by the hour?
- Thomas Jefferson

Have a talk with your mind
(it really is something separate from yourself).
Lay down the law.
"My life begins TODAY.
I am like a newborn.
I have what I have today;
I have my fingers, my toes,
some people in my life,
some material and financial state.
Yesterday is only a dream -
perhaps a nightmare,
perhaps a cherished memory,
but only a dream - nothing more.
I will make all decisions and actions based solely
on what I have today as a starting point."
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie

It's funny, when people talk about the 70s I can tell
you the year of every album but when it comes to the
later efforts I can't remember the exact years,
it's funny isn't it?
- Steve Hackett

George is a radio announcer, and when he walks under a bridge...
you can't hear him talk.
- Steven Wright

It's difficult to talk about Pele because I didn't see him.
- Thierry Henry

Everybody you talk to about insurance says the insurance
market has become a lot more vibrant as a result of lifting,
allowing the foreign direct investment.
- John W. Snow

Once a week we go to juvenile hall and talk to boys there.
Just go and spend a day in the juvenile courts.
- Lisa Bonet

You talk about the values that you have whether they're
in favor or not in favor.
That's how you lead.
The reality is, we're losing more and more elections.
- Artur Davis

We can't make any statements here.
We can't talk about the internal politics of Paraguay.
- Alfredo Stroessner

It is vain to talk of the interest of the community,
without understanding what is the interest of the individual.
- Jeremy Bentham

There is a neurologist, a woman over at Harvard who
wanted me to come talk to them,
and in France I have a lot of readers in the sciences.
I can't tell you why.
- Jim Harrison

The thing with me, I can't talk about my work.
I find it very difficult.
- Mark E. Smith

Conservative talk radio works because there are lots
of conservatives who are convinced that they are not
getting the whole story from the regular media.
- Paul Weyrich

If I can go from burglar for the government to talk show host,
you can go from entertainer to congressman.
- G. Gordon Liddy

I never have anything to talk about.
- April Winchell

You can use martial arts to tell a different story.
Ang Lee used martial arts in "Crouching Tiger,
Hidden Dragon" to talk about love.
- Jet Li

The question is not, "Can they reason?" nor,
"Can they talk?" but rather, "Can they suffer?"
- Jeremy Bentham

I'd rather get back to making art than talk about it.
- Jock Sturges

I always read all these books about the slaves.
My mother is very educated.
My father would talk to us like we were grown men.
We never knew what he was talking about half the time.
- Wynton Marsalis

The future? Like unwritten books and unborn children,
you don't talk about it.
- Dietrich Fischer-Dieskau


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