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Funny Stupidity Quotes
Funny Quotes about Stupidity

Let these funny Stupidity Quotes from my large collection of funny quotes about life add a little humor to your day.

Two things are infinite:
the universe and human stupidity;
and I'm not sure about the universe.
- Albert Einstein

Genius may have its limitations,
but stupidity is not thus handicapped.
- Elbert Hubbard

The difference between stupidity and genius
is that genius has its limits.
- Albert Einstein

Only two things are infinite,
the universe and human stupidity,
and I'm not sure about the former.
- Albert Einstein


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Never underestimate the power of human stupidity.
- Robert A. Heinlein

Stupidity is also a gift of God,
but one mustn't misuse it.
- Pope John Paul II

Nothing in all the world is more dangerous
than sincere ignorance and conscientious stupidity.
- Martin Luther King, Jr.


 

I hate war as only a soldier who has lived it can,
only as one who has seen its brutality, its futility, its stupidity.
- Dwight D. Eisenhower

To forget one's purpose is the commonest form of stupidity.
- Friedrich Nietzsche

Fat, drunk, and stupid is no way to go through life, son.
- the movie National Lampoon's Animal House (1978)

A man likes his wife to be
just clever enough to appreciate his cleverness,
and just stupid enough to admire it.
- Israel Zangwill

I never make stupid mistakes.
Only very, very clever ones.
- John Peel

Think of how stupid the average person is,
and realize half of them are stupider than that.
- George Carlin

Everybody is a genius.
But if you judge a fish by its ability to climb a tree,
it will live its whole life believing that it is stupid.
- Albert Einstein

People are stupid;
given proper motivation, almost anyone will believe almost anything.
Because people are stupid, they will believe a lie
because they want to believe it's true,
or because they are afraid it might be true.
- Terry Goodkind

When a stupid man is doing something he is ashamed of,
he always declares that it's his duty.
- George Bernard Shaw

A man must be both stupid and uncharitable
who believes there is no virtue or truth but on his own side.
- Joseph Addison

Stupid is as stupid does.
- the movie Forrest Gump (1994)

Love interrupts, if you like,
the consequences of your actions,
which in my case is very good news indeed,
because I've done a lot of stupid stuff.
- Bono

Love is being stupid together.
- Paul Valery

If you ask a stupid question, you may feel stupid;
if you don't ask a stupid question, you remain stupid.
- Tony Rothman

If you want to improve,
be content to be thought foolish and stupid.
- Epictetus

Whoever loves instruction loves knowledge,
but he who hates correction is stupid.
- Anonymous

It is one of the blessings of old friends
that you can afford to be stupid with them.
- Ralph Waldo Emerson

An instructed and intelligent people
are always more decent and orderly
than an ignorant and stupid one.
- Adam Smith

I don't care whose fault this was, just get it sorted!
And could someone please bring me something deep fat fried
and smothered in chocolate.
- the movie Shrek 2

I want to thank my parents for everything I am today -
fat, miserable, and paranoid.
- Anonymous

A friend doesn't go on a diet because you are fat.
- Erma Bombeck

A conservative is a man who is
too cowardly to fight and too fat to run.
- Elbert Hubbard

The devil has put a penalty on all things we enjoy in life.
Either we suffer in health or we suffer in soul or we get fat.
- Albert Einstein

Mind Chatter...
"I'm too fat; I'm too thin; and my hair is a fright;
And I'm never enough; and my world is not right;
I'm not smart; I'm not cute; I'm not strong; I'm a bust
I earn scorn; I earn hate; I'm no good; I disgust."
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie

I care not much for a man's religion
whose dog and cat are not the better for it.
- Abraham Lincoln

I don't know, I don't care,
and it doesn't make any difference!
- Albert Einstein

Take care of the sense
and the sounds will take care of themselves.
- Lewis Carroll

Is it ignorance or apathy?
Hey, I don't know and I don't care.
- Jimmy Buffett

If you want total security, go to prison.
There you're fed, clothed, given medical care and so on.
The only thing lacking... is freedom.
- Dwight D. Eisenhower

Just because I don't care,
doesn't mean I don't understand.
- Matt Groening's TV series The Simpsons.

I don't care what anybody says about me
as long as it isn't true.
- Truman Capote

Apathy, indifference, not caring...
It may sound insensitive for me to say, "I don't care,"
but ask first to what I am indifferent.
I choose to be caring, compassionate
and kind toward all people,
and I also choose to be indifferent to gossip,
petty complaints, and idle chatter.
About those, I just don't care.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie

Farewell My Friend
It was beautiful as long as it lasted
The journey of my life.
I have no regrets whatsoever
save the pain I'll leave behind.
Those dear hearts who love and care...
And the strings pulling at the heart and soul...
The strong arms that held me up
When my own strength let me down.
At every turning of my life
I came across good friends,
Friends who stood by me,
Even when the time raced me by.
Farewell, farewell my friends
I smile and bid you goodbye.
No, shed no tears for I need them not
All I need is your smile.
If you feel sad do think of me
for that's what I'll like
when you live in the hearts
of those you love, remember then
you never die.
- Gitanjali Ghei

People don't care how much you know
until they know how much they care.
- John C. Maxwell

A man too busy to take care of his health is like
a mechanic too busy to take care of his tools.
- Spanish Proverb

Remember that children, marriages, and flower gardens
reflect the kind of care they get.
- H. Jackson Brown, Jr.

We are afraid to care too much, for fear
that the other person does not care at all.
- Eleanor Roosevelt

Caring - Kindness - Compassion - Appreciation ...
It is my choice to care deeply about others.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie

WHY do you care what THEY think?
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie

We take care of the future best by taking care of the present now.
- Jon Kabat-Zinn

I predict future happiness for Americans
if they can prevent the government
from wasting the labors of the people
under the pretense of taking care of them.
- Thomas Jefferson

Whatever words we utter should be chosen with care
for people will hear them and be influenced
by them for good or ill.
- The Buddha

We should take care not to make the intellect our god;
it has, of course, powerful muscles, but no personality.
- Albert Einstein

Be avid.
Create apart from perfection.
Risk failure.
Cover your words with sweat.
Run a little
Touch excruciatingly.
Laugh until you cry.
Dance with your eyes closed.
Care.
Understand you die a little in every moment.
Be Enlivened
- Mary Anne Radmacher

The care of human life and happiness, and not their destruction,
is the first and only object of good government.
- Thomas Jefferson

Nobody cares how much you know,
until they know how much you care.
- attributed to Theodore Roosevelt, among others,
but probably earlier and anonymous

History does not long entrust the care of freedom
to the weak or the timid.
- Dwight D. Eisenhower

I do not want to foresee the future.
I am concerned with taking care of the present.
God has given me no control over the moment following.
- Mohandas (Mahatma) Gandhi

The more we care for the happiness of others,
the greater is our own sense of well-being.
- Tenzin Gyatso, the 14th Dalai Lama

If everyone is moving forward together,
then success takes care of itself.
- Henry Ford

If you really aren't trying to get anywhere else in this moment,
patience takes care of itself.
- Jon Kabat-Zinn

Love begins by taking care of the closest ones -
the ones at home.
- Mother Teresa

Some people care too much. I think it's called love.
- A. A. Milne (Winnie-The-Pooh)

Self-care is critical to having a strong inner foundation.
Taking good care of YOU means the people in your life
will receive the best of you rather than what is left of you.
- Lorraine Cohen

Always aim high, work hard, and care deeply
about what you believe in.
When you stumble, keep faith.
When you're knocked down, get right back up.
And never listen to anyone who says
you can't or shouldn't go on.
- Hilary Clinton

We should not let our response to
the people who disagree with us
be dictated by what they say about us
or even how they treat people we care for.
There has to be a chance that we can find love.
- William J. Clinton

Beginning today, treat everyone you meet
as if they were going to be dead by midnight.
Extend to them all the care,
kindness and understanding you can muster,
and do with no thought of any reward.
Your life will never be the same again.
- Og Mandino

You have made people listen.
You have made people care, and you have taught us
that whether we are poor or prosperous,
we have only one world to share.
You have taught young people that
they do have the power to change the world.
- Kofi Annan, UN Secretary General, to Bono. (November 1999)

In my own deepening understanding of myself
I find my capacity to serve others is deepened as well.
The better I am at self-care
the more genuinely nurturing of others I am able to be.
- Mary Anne Radmacher

Modern cynics and skeptics... see no harm in paying those
to whom they entrust the minds of their children
a smaller wage than is paid to those to whom
they entrust the care of their plumbing.
- John F. Kennedy

I choose to be caring, compassionate and kind toward all people,
and I also choose to be indifferent to gossip,
petty complaints, and idle chatter.
About those, I just don't care.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie

It is my choice to care deeply about others.
No kindness is too small to be important -
the smile to the bank teller,
the sincere "thank you" for all kindnesses received,
the reassuring hand on the shoulder of a loved one or friend.
There is compassion in selfless generosity,
but there is also compassion in heartfelt empathy.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie

My God, this is a hell of a job. I have no trouble with my enemies.
I can take care of my enemies all right.
But my damn friends, my goddamn friends.
They're the ones that keep me walking the floor at night.
- Warren G. Harding

If you doubt the virtue in self-honor,
remember what the flight attendant says,
"Put your own oxygen mask on first."
You are of no use to anyone else
if you have not taken care of your own needs first -
this includes your own emotional,
as well as physical, well-being.
In addition, your greatest value to your children,
your family, your friends, and your community
is the example you set, leading a great life that inspires
those around you to emulate your being.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie


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May the world be kind to you,
and may your own thoughts be gentle upon yourself.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie


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