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Funny Quotes about Life
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Funny Speed Quotes
Funny Quotes about Speed

Let these funny Speed Quotes from my large collection of funny quotes about life add a little humor to your day.

Life is like a ten speed bicycle.
Most of us have gears we never use.
- Charles M. Schulz

True friendship's laws are by this rule express'd,
Welcome the coming, speed the parting guest.
- Alexander Pope

Damn the torpedoes, full speed ahead.
- David Farragut

There is more to life than increasing its speed.
- Mohandas (Mahatma) Gandhi


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The speed of the leader determines the rate of the pack.
- Ralph Waldo Emerson

In skating over thin ice, our safety is in our speed.
- Ralph Waldo Emerson

The speed of communications is wondrous to behold.
It is also true that speed can multiply
the distribution of information that we know to be untrue.
- Edward R. Murrow


 

Walking takes longer...
than any other known form of locomotion except crawling.
Thus it stretches time and prolongs life.
Life is already too short to waste on speed.
- Edward Abbey

Power and speed be hands and feet.
- Ralph Waldo Emerson

The newest computer can merely compound, at speed,
the oldest problem in the relations between human beings,
and in the end the communicator will be confronted with the old problem,
of what to say and how to say it.
- Edward R. Murrow

On His Blindness:
When I consider how my light is spent
Ere half my days in this dark world and wide,
And that one Talent which is death to hide
Lodged with me useless, though my soul more bent
To serve therewith my Maker, and present
My true account, lest He returning chide,
"Doth God exact day-labour, light denied?"
I fondly ask. But Patience, to prevent
That murmur, soon replies, "God doth not need
Either man's work or his own gifts. Who best
Bear his mild yoke, they serve him best. His state
Is kingly: thousands at his bidding speed,
And post o'er land and ocean without rest;
They also serve who only stand and wait.
- John Milton (1608-1674)

Common sense and a sense of humor are the same thing,
moving at different speeds.
A sense of humor is just common sense, dancing.
- William James

Fear of death ... That's funny. I have that too.
My dog has it. It's very common with living creatures.
- the movie Anything Else (2003)

The Lord prefers common-looking people.
That is why he makes so many of them.
- Abraham Lincoln

Common sense is the collection of prejudices acquired by age eighteen.
- Albert Einstein

Well excuse me - we've got something
a little unusual going on here -
time travel, parallel universes,
or just a little common ordinary insanity.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie

Society is always taken by surprise
at any new example of common sense.
- Ralph Waldo Emerson

Religion is regarded by the common people as true,
by the wise as false, and by the rulers as useful.
- Lucius Annaeus Seneca

A common denominator of all religions is that
they have the power to bring out the best and the worst in people.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie

Common looking people are the best in the world:
that is the reason the Lord makes so many of them.
- Abraham Lincoln

God must love the common man, he made so many of them.
- Abraham Lincoln

Believe nothing, no matter where you read it,
or who said it, no matter if I have said it,
unless it agrees with your own reason
and your own common sense.
- The Buddha

There is nothing more uncommon than common sense.
- Frank Lloyd Wright

If you fear making anyone mad,
then you ultimately probe for
the lowest common denominator of human achievement.
- Jimmy Carter

The common denominator of our heroes
is that each set their own course.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie

Naturally, the common people don't want war ...
but after all it is the leaders of a country who determine the policy,
and it is always a simple matter to drag the people along,
whether it is a democracy, or a fascist dictatorship,
or a parliament, or a communist dictatorship.
Voice or no voice, the people can always be brought
to the bidding of the leaders.
That is easy. All you have to do is tell them
they are being attacked,
and denounce the pacifists for lack of patriotism
and exposing the country to danger.
It works the same in every country.
- Hermann Goering

Nothing is so common-place as to wish to be remarkable.
- Oliver Wendell Holmes, Jr.

Our most basic common link is that we all inhabit this planet.
We all breathe the same air.
We all cherish our children's future.
And we are all mortal.
- John F. Kennedy

If all misfortunes were laid in one common heap
whence everyone must take an equal portion,
most people would be contented to take their own and depart.
- Socrates

A sense of humor is just common sense, dancing.
- William James

The most common way people give up their power
is by thinking they don't have any.
- Alice Walker

Common Sense is that which judges
the things given to it by other senses.
- Leonardo da Vinci

The people are the foundation of the nation.
Our only chance for a lasting peace on earth:
the release of the strength of the common man.
- Jimmy Yen

Common sense is genius dressed in its working clothes.
- Ralph Waldo Emerson

The invariable mark of wisdom is to
see the miraculous in the common.
- Ralph Waldo Emerson

When you can do the common things of life in an uncommon way,
you will command the attention of the world.
- George Washington Carver

Learn to do common things uncommonly well;
we must always keep in mind that anything
that helps fill the dinner pail is valuable.
- George Washington Carver

Nothing astonishes men so much as common sense and plain dealing.
- Ralph Waldo Emerson

We seek to emphasize those practical things that we have in common.
- Australian Prime Minister John Howard

The common denominator for success is work.
- John D. Rockefeller

Like music and art, love of nature is a common language
that can transcend political or social boundaries.
- Jimmy Carter

If one advances confidently
in the direction of his dreams,
and endeavors to live
the life which he has imagined,
he will meet with success
unexpected in common hours.
- Henry David Thoreau

Common sense is the knack of seeing things as they are,
and doing things as they ought to be done.
- Josh Billings

The future has nothing in common with the past -
except natural laws and human nature.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie

It is difficult for the common good to prevail
against the intense concentration
of those who have a special interest,
especially if the decisions are made behind locked doors.
- Jimmy Carter

It is curious - curious that physical courage
should be so common in the world, and moral courage so rare
- Mark Twain

Diversity is the one true thing we all have in common.
Celebrate it every day.
- Anonymous

The new rage is to say that the government
is the cause of all our problems,
and if only we had no government, we'd have no problems.
I can tell you, that contradicts
evidence, history, and common sense.
- William J. Clinton

I have learned, that if one advances confidently
in the direction of his dreams,
and endeavors to live the life he has imagined,
he will meet with a success unexpected in common hours.
- Henry David Thoreau

We are not going to be able
to operate our Spaceship Earth
successfully nor for much longer
unless we see it as a whole spaceship
and our fate as common.
It has to be everybody or nobody.
- R. Buckminster Fuller

Do real life people actually fall in love
with the idea of being in love?
Unfortunately, it is actually quite common.
Someone wants desperately to have
the husband or wife of their dreams.
They visualize the vine-covered cottage
with the white picket fence.
They choose the colors for the nursery.
They design all the aspects of their married life.
A real person stands no chance of measuring up to those fantasies.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie

There are old heads in the world
who cannot help me by their example or advice
to live worthily and satisfactorily to myself;
but I believe that it is in my power
to elevate myself this very hour
above the common level of my life.
- Henry David Thoreau

Nothing in the world can take the place of persistence.
Talent will not;
nothing is more common than unsuccessful men with talent.
Genius will not;
unrewarded genius is almost a proverb.
Education will not;
the world is full of educated derelicts.
Persistence and determination alone are omnipotent.
- Calvin Coolidge

Teamwork is the ability to work together toward a common vision.
The ability to direct individual accomplishments
toward organizational objectives.
It is the fuel that allows common people to attain uncommon results.
- Andrew Carnegie

If you advance confidently in the direction of your dreams
and endeavor to leave the life which you have imagined,
you will you will meet with a success unexpected in common hours.
- Henry David Thoreau

I have thought there was some advantage even in death,
by which we mingle with the herd of common men.
- Henry David Thoreau

If one advances confidently in the direction of his dreams,
and endeavors to live the life which he has imagined,
he will meet with a success unexpected in common hours.
He will put some things behind, will pass an invisible boundary;
new, universal, and more liberal laws
will begin to establish themselves around and within him;
or the old laws be expanded, and interpreted in his favor
in a more liberal sense,
and he will live with the license of a higher order of beings.
- Henry David Thoreau

There's nothing wrong with being afraid.
We were meant to be afraid.
- the Woody Allen movie Anything Else

The fear of death is the most unjustified of all fears,
for there's no risk of accident for someone who's dead.
- Albert Einstein

Know that the greatest fear is fear of the unknown.
Seek to meet the unknown with courage and a sense of adventure.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie

I have no fear of the gallows ... They're going to shoot me.
- the movie Love and Death

The greatest mistake you can make in life
is to be continually fearing you will make one.
- Elbert Hubbard

Tell your heart that the fear of suffering
is worse than the suffering itself.
- Paulo Coelho

I do not fear death.
I had been dead for billions and billions
of years before I was born,
and had not suffered the slightest inconvenience from it.
- Mark Twain

Nothing is more despicable than respect based on fear.
- Albert Camus

FEAR is an acronym in the English language
for "False Evidence Appearing Real."
- Neale Donald Walsch

Never let the fear of striking out get in your way.
- Babe Ruth

The most painful and debilitating fear is fear of the unknown.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie

Authority has every reason to fear the skeptic,
for authority can rarely survive in the face of doubt.
- Robert Lindner

The cave you fear to enter holds the treasure you seek.
- Joseph Campbell

To live a creative life
we must lose our fear of being wrong.
- Joseph Chilton Pearce


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- Jonathan Lockwood Huie

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