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Let these funny Sighing Quotes from my large collection of funny quotes about life add a little humor to your day.
If we spend the time we waste in sighing
for the perfect golden fruit
in fulfilling the conditions of its growth,
happiness will come, must come.
It is guaranteed in the very laws of the universe.
If it involves some chastening and renunciation, well,
the fruit will be all the sweeter for this touch of holiness.
- Helen Keller
The first sigh of love is the last breath of wisdom.
- Anonymous 
When I hear somebody sigh, "Life is hard,"
I am always tempted to ask, Compared to what?
- Sydney Harris
Don't go around saying the world owes you a living;
the world owes you nothing; it was here first.
- Mark Twain
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I am a man of fixed and unbending principles,
the first of which is to be flexible at all times.
- Everett Dirksen
If at first you don't succeed,
skydiving is not for you.
- Anonymous
Men always want to be a woman's first love -
women like to be a man's last romance.
- Oscar Wilde
When I first saw you, I thought you were handsome.
Then, of course, you spoke.
- the movie As Good As It Gets (1997)
Marriages don't last. When I meet a guy,
the first question I ask myself is:
is this the man I want my children to spend their weekends with?
- Rita Rudner
When I eventually met Mr. Right
I had no idea that his first name was Always.
- Rita Rudner
If he's first class, I'm traveling steerage.
- the movie Libeled Lady (1936)
One's first love is always perfect
until one meets one's second love.
- Elizabeth Aston
There are four stages in a marriage.
First there's the affair,
then the marriage,
then children
and finally the fourth stage,
without which you cannot know a woman, the divorce.
- Norman Mailer
After the first blush of sin, comes its indifference.
- Henry David Thoreau
The physician can bury his mistakes,
but the architect can only advise his client to plant vines -
so they should go as far as possible from home
to build their first buildings.
- Frank Lloyd Wright
Getting fired is nature's way to telling you
that you had the wrong job in the first place.
- Hal Lancaster
Smile first thing in the morning. Get it over with.
- W. C. Fields
There are two kinds of people,
those who do the work,
and those who take the credit.
Try to be in the first group;
there is less competition there.
- Indira Gandhi
Those who have free seats at a play hiss first.
- Chinese Proverb
I don't know which will go first - rock 'n' roll or Christianity.
- John Lennon
If at first you don't succeed,
try, try, and try again.
Then give up.
There's no use being a damned fool about it.
- W. C. Fields
Contrary to general belief,
I do not believe that friends are necessarily
the people you like best,
they are merely the people who got there first.
- Peter Ustinov
Get the facts first.
You can distort them later.
- Mark Twain
Many a man owes his success to his first wife
and his second wife to his success.
- Jim Backus
We're more popular than Jesus now;
I don't know which will go first, rock 'n' roll or Christianity.
- John Lennon
The only true love is love at first sight;
second sight dispels it.
- Israel Zangwill
Life is uncertain; always eat dessert first.
- Anonymous
To climb steep hills requires a slow pace at first.
- William Shakespeare
Faith is taking the first step,
even when you don't see the whole staircase.
- Martin Luther King, Jr.
Seek first to understand,
then to be understood.
- Stephen Covey
When we step on the battlefield, I will be
The First Boots On and the Last Boots Off.
- LtG. Hal Moore
Christianity will go. It will vanish and shrink.
I needn't argue with that; I'm right and I will be proved right.
We're more popular than Jesus now;
I don't know which will go first - rock and roll or Christianity.
- John Lennon
Always be a first-rate version of yourself,
instead of a second-rate version of somebody else.
- Judy Garland
Apathy, indifference, not caring...
It may sound insensitive for me to say, "I don't care,"
but ask first to what I am indifferent.
I choose to be caring, compassionate
and kind toward all people,
and I also choose to be indifferent to gossip,
petty complaints, and idle chatter.
About those, I just don't care.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie
Today is the first day of the rest of your life.
- Anonymous
Tolerance is the first principle of community;
it is the spirit which conserves
the best that all men think.
- Helen Keller
All things at first appear difficult.
- Chinese proverb
Belief is a virus, and once it gets into you,
its first order of business is to preserve itself,
and the way it preserves itself
is to keep you from having any doubts,
and the way it keeps you from doubting
is to blind you to the way things really are.
- Philip Caputo
BERLIN: PROCLAMATION TO THE GERMAN NATION FEBRUARY 1, 1933
The National Government will regard it as its first and foremost duty
to revive in the nation the spirit of unity and co-operation.
It will preserve and defend those basic principles
on which our nation has been built.
It regards Christianity as the foundation of our national morality,
and the family as the basis of national life....
- Adolf Hitler
The first quality that is needed is audacity.
- Winston Churchill
Lovers who have been left, lose confidence and become afraid.
They learn to leave relationships first.
The broken hearted become the heart breakers.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie
Experience is a hard teacher.
She gives the test first
and the lessons afterwards.
- Anonymous
Take a deep breath and do the difficult thing first.
- Mary Anne Radmacher
Give thanks for the rainbows, for the butterflies,
for all God's creatures - large and small,
for the bright blue sky and the soft fog and the gentle rain,
for the tree veiled in the season's first frost,
for the baby's laugh, for the touch of a hand
and the whispered "I love you."
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie
Okay, here's your first lesson: how to take a FALL!
- the movie Karate Kid
First they ignore you, then they laugh at you,
then they fight you, then you win.
- Mohandas (Mahatma) Gandhi
During the first period of a man's life
the greatest danger is not to take the risk.
- Soren Kierkegaard
It's all right for a woman to be, above all, human.
I am a woman first of all.
- Anais Nin
Put on your own oxygen mask first.
- Airline companies
Habits are cobwebs at first, cables at last.
- Chinese proverb
The second office in the government is honorable and easy;
the first is but a splendid misery.
- Thomas Jefferson
In my country we go to prison first, and then become President.
- Nelson Mandela
Self-trust is the first secret of success.
- Ralph Waldo Emerson
Recognizing my blindness is the first step
toward regaining my sight.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie
You have a row of dominoes set up;
you knock over the first one,
and what will happen to the last one
is that it will go over very quickly.
- Dwight D. Eisenhower
Every really new idea looks crazy at first.
- Alfred North Whitehead
It is usually the imagination that is wounded first,
rather than the heart; it being much more sensitive.
- Henry David Thoreau
In rivers, the water that you touch
is the last of what has passed
and the first of that which comes;
so with present time.
- Leonardo da Vinci
Thanks to television, for the first time
the young are seeing history made
before it is censored by their elders.
- Margaret Mead
There are two things to aim at in life:
first, to get what you want,
and after that to to enjoy it.
- Logan Pearsall Smith
Give me six hours to chop down a tree
and I will spend the first four sharpening the axe.
- Abraham Lincoln
Know first that you have absolutely no power to change the world,
and then address all your energies and intent toward improving it.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie
The secret of getting ahead is getting started.
The secret of getting started is
breaking your complex overwhelming tasks
into small manageable tasks,
and starting on the first one.
- Mark Twain
Our "Rainbows and Butterflies" are the small miracles of our life -
the little things that are so easy to overlook,
yet so awe inspiring when we take a moment
to notice and to pay attention.
Give thanks for the rainbows, for the butterflies,
for all God's creatures - large and small,
for the bright blue sky and the soft fog and the gentle rain,
for the tree veiled in the season's first frost,
for the baby's laugh,
for the touch of a hand and the whispered "I love you."
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie
Do not say, "It is morning,"
and dismiss it with a name of yesterday.
See it for the first time
as a newborn child that has no name.
- Rabindranath Tagore
Look at everything as though you were seeing it
either for the first or last time.
Then your time on earth will be filled with glory.
- Betty Smith
First say to yourself what you would be;
then do what you have to do.
- Epictetus
A holiday, the day I first named you, "friend."
- Mary Anne Radmacher
Let him that would move the world first move himself.
- Socrates
Know, first, who you are, and then adorn yourself accordingly.
- Epictetus
You grow up the day you have
your first real laugh - at yourself.
- Ethel Barrymore
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May the world be kind to you,
and may your own thoughts be gentle upon yourself.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie
All materials & writings are copyright © Jonathan Lockwood Huie, except for quotes and other specifically identified material which belong to their respective copyright holders if applicable.