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Funny Shop Quotes
Funny Quotes about Shop

Let these funny Shop Quotes from my large collection of funny quotes about life add a little humor to your day.

Happiness is the china shop; love is the bull.
- H. L. Mencken

I love to shop after a bad relationship.
I don't know. I buy a new outfit
and it makes me feel better. It just does.
Sometimes I see a really great outfit,
I'll break up with someone on purpose.
- Rita Rudner

I remember when the candle shop burned down.
Everyone stood around singing 'Happy Birthday.'
- Steven Wright

People who shop in health food stores never look healthy.
- Amy Sedaris


 

Products made in China are cheap through the exploitation of the workforce.
Every time we shop, we are driving the nail further
into the coffin of American manufacturing jobs.
- Joe Baca

I liked to work in a shop down in the basement and
invent things and build gadgets.
- Francis Ford Coppola

Law is not a profession at all, but rather a business
service station and repair shop.
- Adlai E. Stevenson


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I can set up shop anywhere.
I've got my oils, I've got my yoga mat and I'm good to go.
I must know good yoga classes in about 25 cities on this planet.
- Minnie Driver

I don't shop.
I haven't shopped in about four years.
- Adrian Grenier

Going to work around 8:00am at the body shop.
After work it's either weight training or practicing afterwards.
- Ben Jackson

To make money I picked up work as a busboy,
valet parker, skateboard shop employee.
- David Spade

I'm recording another demo for another batch of record
labels that we'll shop it around to.
- Ahmed Best

I never worked in a coffee shop and I don't drink coffee,
so I never thought I would become a coffee pusher on TV.
- Scott Patterson

Buy, buy, says the sign in the shop window;
Why,
why, says the junk in the yard.
- Paul McCartney

Yes, during the pilot, they gave me a little toy from the shop.
It's like three little moose in a boat,
paddling.
It's very cute.
And I got to keep some of the clothes.
- Caroline Dhavernas

Dates with actors, finally, just seemed to me evenings of shop talk.
I got sick of it after a hile.
So the more famous I became, the more I narrowed down my choices.
- Hedy Lamarr

I read The Old Curiosity Shop before I began Blackwood Farm.
I was amazed at the utter madness in that book.
- Anne Rice

At The Body Shop we had always been measured by how
many jobs we had created,
and I got a major award from the Queen on that.
- Anita Roddick

I dress up for awards, but only if somebody else is
going to pay for the clothes.
And shop for them, too!
- Tea Leoni

A neighborhood friend showed me how it was possible
to go to a camera shop and pick up chemicals for pennies...
literally...
and develop your own film and make prints.
- Leonard Nimoy

Just the other day, my assistant was on the line with Calvin Klein.
Golly, I usually shop at Sears.
- Billy Bob Thornton

Being appointed Elder Professor meant very much taking over the shop,
in that the professor in those days controlled all the moneys.
- John Henry Carver

My view on issues is based on common sense,
and my experience as a mother of four children,
as a sole parent, and as a businesswoman running a fish and chip shop.
- Pauline Hanson

Advertising ought to work by telling you what it is you want to tell,
you should understand what you want us to do,
what you want us to think, where you want us to shop.
- Jay Chiat

If I were to try to read, much less answer,
all the attacks made on me,
this shop might as well be closed for any other business.
- Abraham Lincoln

I'm very interested in my new kitchen equipment shop.
I've started it with two friends.
- Elizabeth David

Every small town has its dramatic group,
its barber-shop quartet, every home has music in one form or another.
- Kate Smith

The Body Shop Foundation is run by our staff and supports
social activism and environmental activism.
We don't tend to support big agencies.
- Anita Roddick

I'm just like every other girl who likes to shop,
likes to look good, likes to spend time with friends.
- Maria Sharapova

It is a strange trade that of advocacy.
Your intellect, your highest heavenly gift is hung
up in the shop window like a loaded pistol for sale.
- Thomas Carlyle

In a house where there are small children the bathroom
soon takes on the appearance of the Old Curiosity Shop.
- Robert Benchley

Keep your shop, and your shop will keep you.
- William Turner

The Monmouth Coffee Shop is the best place in London.
- Kyle MacLachlan

When someone follows you all the way to the shop and
watches you buy toilet roll,
you know your life has changed.
- Jennifer Aniston

My big places to shop are Wal-Mart and Target -
seriously.
That is where half of my stuff comes from now.
- Kelly Preston

The Greatest Generation got to save old tires,
dig a Victory Garden and forgo sugar.
The Richest Generation is being asked to shop.
- Margaret Carlson

We didn't have a beauty shop as I grew up.
- Jenifer Lewis

I don't shop because I need something,
I just shop for shopping's sake.
- Cat Deeley

Godspell was a good leap for me, it was a good shop window.
- Jeremy Irons

A magazine or a newspaper is a shop.
Each is an experiment and represents a new focus,
a new ratio between commerce and intellect.
- John Jay Chapman

Thank God we're living in a country where the sky's the limit,
the stores are open late and you can shop in bed thanks to television.
- Joan Rivers

I was not prepared for the actual process itself;
having to go to the shop and having some molds done.
- David Naughton

It is better that one's customers come to one's shop
than to have to look for them abroad.
- Manfred von Richthofen

If I were to play somebody who ran a fish and chip shop,
I would not work in a fish and chip shop for three months.
Staring at chips is not going to help me in my performance.
- Ben Kingsley

I usually shop at Charlotte Ruth and Bebe.
- Christy Romano

We've been playing ugly.
Without all of our bodies, we've been kicking it all over the shop,
but fortunately we've been able to make the big buckets
and rely on our defense for once.
- Steve Nash

If you want to surf, move to Hawaii.
If you like to shop, move to New York.
If you like acting and Hollywood, move to California.
But if you like college football, move to Texas.
- Ricky Williams

A determined soul will do more with a rusty monkey
wrench than a loafer will accomplish with all the tools in a machine shop.
- Robert Hughes

I don't have any beauty shop memories.
I remember the barber shop.
- Jenifer Lewis

The only change I can really see is that I don't have
to shop for pants in stores anymore.
- Larry David

I shop, therefore I am.
- Tammy Faye Bakker

You can work, shop, do everything from home,
and I find this unsettling.
- Patrice Leconte

I like to shop, but I don't like to go out to dances.
- Etta James

I'm trying to open a Chopper shop this year.
- Noah Hathaway

I love to find a great vintage secondhand shop.
- Bridget Hall

I Worked in the family auto body shop,
lifted weights, and rode a few Victory Sports Indoors.
- Ben Jackson

Television is not real life.
In real life people actually have to leave the coffee shop and go to jobs.
- Bill Gates

Tower Records is like a temple to me.
I'll stay there for hours.
Nobody can shop for records with me.
It drives them out of their minds.
- Billy Bob Thornton

People shop for a bathing suit with more care than
they do a husband or wife.
The rules are the same.
Look for something you'll feel comfortable wearing.
Allow for room to grow.
- Erma Bombeck

My longing to improve my looks via The Body Shop is
being replaced by my longing to improve my looks via Photoshop.
- Gina Barreca

I'm obsessed with shopping.
I'll get these urges to buy, like to shop for stuff on the Internet.
I search for all kinds of weird gizmos I could get.
- Tom Felton

Creative ideas flourish best in a shop which preserves some spirit of fun.
Nobody is in business for fun, but that does not mean
there cannot be fun in business.
- Leo Burnett

I like to think of myself at home in the armchair,
writing, smoking and occasionally wandering down the shop.
- Stephen Fry

A whole new generation is looking at the videos,
and going to the video shop and buying the re-release of the complete trilogy,
which you can buy at a reasonable price.
- Peter Mayhew

I'm a bit of a nerd, I wouldn't mind working in a shop selling records,
or having a radio show where I could play obscure singles.
- Bjork

I think that the mere fact that I'm doing it ought to inspire someone.
In junior high school the counselor suggested that
I focus on wood shop and metal shop.
- Christopher Darden

That's what we wanted to get across in that moment,
particularly when Shaun goes to the shop when he's all hung over.
He doesn't notice any of the zombies around him just
because he never had before,
so why should he at that point?
- Simon Pegg

But, the thing is, since I always had my own little
shop and direct access to the public,
I've been able to build up a technique without marketing
people ever telling me what the public wants.
- Vivienne Westwood

Sonny and another Hells Angel who was at the meeting
thought they were beyond a little patch so they headed
down to a local tattoo shop in Oakland and were the
first to get the famous One Percent tattoos.
- Chuck Zito

Nobody understood The Reoccurring Dream,
but after September 11, when we were coerced to do
a national duty and go out and shop,
surely people could begin to see what I was getting at.
- Joni Mitchell

For the producers, there was no reason to produce.
You get money, but you couldn't use this money.
For consumers, you could have money,
but you have no way to use it because you go to the shop and see nothing.
- Anatoly Chubais


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