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Funny Quotes about Life
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Funny Rock Quotes
Funny Quotes about Rock

Let these funny Rock Quotes from my large collection of funny quotes about life add a little humor to your day.

We're more popular than Jesus now;
I don't know which will go first, rock 'n' roll or Christianity.
- John Lennon

I don't know which will go first - rock 'n' roll or Christianity.
- John Lennon

Diplomacy is the art of saying "Nice doggie"
until you can find a rock.
- Will Rogers

Christianity will go. It will vanish and shrink.
I needn't argue with that; I'm right and I will be proved right.
We're more popular than Jesus now;
I don't know which will go first - rock and roll or Christianity.
- John Lennon


 

As a rock star, I have two instincts,
I want to have fun, and I want to change the world.
I have a chance to do both.
- Bono

A true friend is a rock upon whom you can depend.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie

In matters of style, swim with the current;
in matters of principle, stand like a rock.
- Thomas Jefferson


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The River of Life can cut through solid rock - in its own time.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie

The River of Life knows no obstacles.
The River can cut through solid rock - in its own time.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie

The way lies in softness and patience,
as the softest water cuts through the hardest rock.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie

In the confrontation between the stream and the rock,
the stream always wins -
not through strength but by perseverance.
- The Buddha

The LORD is my rock, and my fortress, and my deliverer;
my God, my strength, in whom I will trust.
- Psalm 18:2

If you tried to give rock and roll another name,
you might call it "Chuck Berry."
- John Lennon

The River of Life has no judgments.
The River flows with no concept of good and bad - right and wrong.
The fields and dreams of men may be nourished by the River of Life,
or flooded and covered with silt, and the River just flows.
Men may catch fish and live on the River of Life,
or they may founder in a storm and drown, and the River just flows.
The River of Life is timeless.
It is not unchanging, but it is timeless,
and it changes in its own time.
The River of Life knows no obstacles.
The River can cut through solid rock - in its own time.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie

Rock 'n' roll is ridiculous. It's absurd.
In the past, U2 was trying to duck that.
Now we're wrapping our arms around it and giving it a great big kiss.
- Bono

Laws are sand, customs are rock.
Laws can be evaded and punishment escaped,
but an openly transgressed custom brings sure punishment.
The penalty may be unfair, unrighteous, illogical, and a cruelty;
no matter, it will be inflicted, just the same.
Certainly, then, there can be but one wise thing
for a visiting stranger to do -
find out what the country's customs are,
and refrain from offending against them.
- Mark Twain

Don't dream it, be it.
- the movie Rocky Horror Picture Show

I despise people who go to the gutter
on either the right or the left
and hurl rocks at those in the center.
- Dwight D. Eisenhower

Anchoring in soft mud is dangerous.
Anchor thyself to the rocks of Faith, Compassion, and Service.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie

Personally, I have fond memories of playing
on slippery rocks on the banks of a rushing river
as a child and hitchhiking in college.
To those who say, "But times are different now,"
I reply that statistically life is much safer now
than in the 1950s, with regard to both crime and accidents.
What has changed is our attitudes.
In those years, a broken leg from falling off a swing
or the back of a tractor was just part of childhood -
an excuse for gathering autographs.
Today that broken leg would be a source
of outrage and probably lawsuits.
I long for a simpler time when life was taken less seriously.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie

I'm saving that rocker for the day
when I feel as old as I really am.
- Dwight D. Eisenhower

Worrying is like a rocking chair,
it gives you something to do,
but it gets you nowhere.
- Glenn Turner

As a cure for worrying,
work is better than whiskey.
- Ralph Waldo Emerson

Life only appears complicated when one is worrying.
Relax, and life becomes simple again.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie

You can't change the past,
but you can ruin the present
by worrying about the future.
- Anonymous

If only the people who worry about their liabilities
would think about the riches they do possess,
they would stop worrying.
- Dale Carnegie

Instead of worrying about what people say of you,
why not spend time trying to accomplish
something they will admire.
- Dale Carnegie

If the problem can be solved,
there is no use worrying about it.
If it can't be solved,
worrying will do no good.
- Tibetan proverb

Are you feeling stressed and upset?
If so, you are worrying about tomorrow.
Events that have already occurred may cause you regret,
but they only appear to cause worry.
If you just lost your job, you are not worrying about losing your job -
that already happened.
You are worrying about paying your bills and finding a new job.
Those are worries about tomorrow.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie

There is only one way to happiness and that is to cease worrying
about things which are beyond the power of our will.
- Epictetus

Rather than worrying about the continuous stream of potential threats,
let us give thanks for our blessing of living in the eye-of-the-storm -
our protected refuge from the terrors
of fearsome dangers just outside our lives.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie

Let our advance worrying become advance thinking and planning.
- Winston Churchill

Many people allow their need
for other people's approval to control their lives.
They spend their lives worrying about what others think of them.
- Rick Warren

When we hate our enemies, we are
giving them power over us:
power over our sleep, our appetites,
our blood pressure, our health, and our happiness.
Our enemies would dance with joy if only
they knew how they were worrying us,
lacerating us, and getting even with us!
Our hate is not hurting them at all,
but our hate is turning our own days
and nights into a hellish turmoil.
- Dale Carnegie

Remember that "concern" is about the time, energy, and emotion
that we direct toward worrying about something or someone -
not whether we are for that something or against it.
However, nothing that we do for fun is ever a "concern."
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie

Do you remember the things you were worrying about a year ago?
Didn't you waste a lot of fruitless energy
on account of most of them?
Didn't most of them turn out all right after all?
- Dale Carnegie

Science may have found a cure for most evils;
but it has found no remedy for the worst of them all -
the apathy of human beings.
- Helen Keller

Show me a sane man, and I will cure him for you.
- Carl Jung

Objectivity is the cure for depression.
- Bono

The only cure for grief is action.
- G. H. Lewes

To cure jealousy is to see it for what it is,
a dissatisfaction with self.
- Joan Didion

Participate joyfully in the sorrows of the world.
We cannot cure the world of sorrows,
but we can choose to live in joy.
- Joseph Campbell

Understanding does not cure evil,
but it is a definite help,
inasmuch as one can cope
with a comprehensible darkness.
- Carl Jung

Sameness is the mother of disgust, variety the cure.
- Francesco Petrarch

There is nothing wrong with America
that faith, love of freedom, intelligence,
and energy of her citizens cannot cure.
- Dwight D. Eisenhower

I try to give to the poor people for love
what the rich could get for money.
No, I wouldn't touch a leper for a thousand pounds;
yet I willingly cure him for the love of God.
- Mother Teresa

We may have found a cure for most evils;
but we have found no remedy for the worst of them all,
the apathy of human beings.
- Helen Keller

Prevention is better than cure.
- Desiderius Erasmus

Love is the great miracle cure.
Loving ourselves works miracles in our lives.
- Louise L. Hay

There is no cure for birth and death save to enjoy the interval.
- George Santayana

An ounce of prevention is worth a pound of cure.
- Benjamin Franklin

The best cure for our own self-inflicted suffering
is often service to others.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie

Laugh at yourself and at life.
Not in the spirit of derision or whining self-pity,
but as a remedy, a miracle drug, that will ease your pain,
cure your depression, and help you to put in perspective
that seemingly terrible defeat and worry
with laughter at your predicaments,
thus freeing your mind to think clearly toward the solution
that is certain to come. Never take yourself too seriously.
- Og Mandino

We return thanks to our mother,
the earth, which sustains us.
We return thanks to the rivers and streams
which supply us with water.
We return thanks to all herbs, which furnish medicines
for the cure of our diseases.
We return thanks to the corn, and to her sisters,
the beans and squashes, which give us life.
We return thanks to the bushes and trees,
which provide us with fruit.
We return thanks to the wind,
which, moving the air, has banished diseases.
We return thanks to the moon and the stars,
which have given us their light when the sun was gone.
We return thanks to our grandfather He-no,
that he has protected his grandchildren from witches and reptiles,
and has given us his rain.
We return thanks to the sun,
that he has looked upon the earth with a beneficent eye.
Lastly, we return thanks to the Great Spirit,
in whom is embodied all goodness,
and who directs all things for the good of his children.
- Iroquois traditional

One man's "magic" is another man's engineering.
"Supernatural" is a null word.
- Robert A. Heinlein

Science is a wonderful thing
if one does not have to earn one's living at it.
- Albert Einstein

Science without religion is lame,
religion without science is blind.
- Albert Einstein

The man of science is a poor philosopher.
- Albert Einstein

The grand aim of all science is to cover
the greatest number of empirical facts
by logical deduction from
the smallest number of hypotheses or axioms.
- Albert Einstein

Most of the fundamental ideas of science
are essentially simple,
and may, as a rule, be expressed
in a language comprehensible to everyone.
- Albert Einstein

Ignorance more frequently begets confidence than does knowledge:
it is those who know little, and not those who know much,
who so positively assert that this or that problem
will never be solved by science.
- Charles Darwin

Nature never breaks her own laws.
- Leonardo da Vinci

No problem can be solved from the same level
of consciousness that created it.
- Albert Einstein

One accurate measurement is worth a thousand expert opinions.
- Grace Hopper

Occurrences in this domain are beyond the reach of exact prediction
because of the variety of factors in operation,
not because of any lack of order in nature.
- Albert Einstein

"Uncertainty" is NOT "I don't know."
It is "I can't know."
"I am uncertain" does not mean "I could be certain."
- Wener Karl Heisenberg

Most people say that is it is the intellect
which makes a great scientist.
They are wrong: it is character.
- Albert Einstein

God does not play dice.
- Albert Einstein

No amount of experimentation can ever prove me right;
a single experiment can prove me wrong.
- Albert Einstein

On the ordinary view of each species
having been independently created,
we gain no scientific explanation.
- Charles Darwin

Borrowing knowledge of reality from all sources,
taking the best from every study,
Science of Mind brings together
the highest enlightenment of the ages.
- Ernest Holmes


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- Jonathan Lockwood Huie

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All materials & writings are copyright © Jonathan Lockwood Huie, except for quotes and other specifically identified material which belong to their respective copyright holders if applicable.