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Let these funny Robert Quotes from my large collection of funny quotes about life add a little humor to your day.
Love is an irresistible desire
to be irresistibly desired.
- Robert Frost
One man's theology is another man's belly laugh.
- Robert A. Heinlein
Yield to temptation. It may not pass your way again.
- Robert A. Heinlein
Almost any sect, cult, or religion will
legislate its creed into law
if it acquires the political power.
- Robert A. Heinlein
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One man's "magic" is another man's engineering.
"Supernatural" is a null word.
- Robert A. Heinlein
Authority has every reason to fear the skeptic,
for authority can rarely survive in the face of doubt.
- Robert Lindner
Whenever I feel the need to exercise,
I lie down until it goes away.
- Robert Maynard Hutchins
Anyone who can worship a trinity
and insist that his religion is a monotheism
can believe anything.
- Robert A Heinlein
Anyone can do any amount of work
provided it isn't the work
he is supposed to be doing at the moment.
- Robert Benchley
The man who can smile when things go wrong
has thought of someone else he can blame it on.
- Robert Bloch
Life was a lot simpler when what we honored was father and mother
rather than all major credit cards.
- Robert Orben
It is a truism that almost any sect, cult, or religion
will legislate its creed into law
if it acquires the political power to do so,
and will follow it by suppressing opposition,
subverting all education to seize early the minds of the young,
and by killing, locking up, or driving underground all heretics.
- Robert Heinlein
Only those who dare to fail greatly can ever achieve greatly.
- Robert F. Kennedy
There are those that look at things
the way they are, and ask "Why?"
I dream of things that never were, and ask "Why not?"
- Robert F. Kennedy paraphrase of George Bernard Shaw
The one who loves the least, controls the relationship.
- Robert Anthony
Take away love and our earth is a tomb.
- Robert Browning
In three words, I can sum up everything
I've learned about life - it goes on.
- Robert Frost
Our aspirations are our possibilities.
- Robert Browning
Thinking isn't agreeing or disagreeing. That's voting.
- Robert Frost
A competent and self-confident person is
incapable of jealousy in anything.
Jealousy is invariably a symptom of neurotic insecurity.
- Robert A. Heinlein
Never underestimate the power of human stupidity.
- Robert A. Heinlein
My heart bleeds at the death of every one of our gallant men.
- Robert E. Lee
But what a cruel thing is war
to separate and destroy families and friends.
- Robert E. Lee
Enjoy the little things, for one day you may look back
and realize they were the big things.
- Robert Brault
He who sows hurry reaps indigestion.
- Robert Louis Stevenson
Freedom lies in being bold.
- Robert Frost
Correcting bad habits cannot be done
by forbidding or punishment.
- Robert Baden-Powell (the founder of scouting)
Live life to the fullest.
- Robert Louis Stevenson
Always listen to the experts.
They'll tell you what can't be done and why.
Then do it.
- Robert Heinlein
The only place where your dream becomes impossible
is in your own thinking.
- Robert H. Schuller
Grow old along with me, the best is yet to be.
- Robert Browning
Oh my luve is like a red, red rose,
That's newly sprung in June:
Oh my luve is like the melodie,
That's sweetly play'd in tune.
- Robert Burns
You can never love without giving.
- Robert Louis Stevenson
Success is the sum of small efforts,
repeated day in and day out.
- Robert Collier
The foolish man seeks happiness in the distance;
the wise grows it under his feet.
- J. Robert Oppenheimer
One of the sanest, surest, and most generous joys of life
comes from being happy over the good fortune of others.
- Robert A. Heinlein
The secret of success is to find a need and fill it,
to find a hurt and heal it,
to find somebody with a problem
and offer to help solve it.
- Robert H. Schuller
I value the friend who for me finds time on his calendar,
but I cherish the friend who for me
does not consult his calendar.
- Robert Brault
As we grow as unique persons, we learn to respect
the uniqueness of others.
- Robert H. Schuller
Tough times never last but tough people do.
- Robert H. Schuller
I cannot trust a man to control others
who cannot control himself.
- Robert E. Lee
Irrational beliefs are culturally accepted delusions.
- Robert Todd Carroll
"Be Prepared."
"Be prepared for what?"
"Why, for any old thing."
- Robert Baden-Powell,
the founder of Scouting.
[as quoted in the Boy Scout Handbook]
Don't judge each day by the harvest you reap,
but by the seeds that you plant.
- Robert Louis Stevenson
It is difficult to say what is impossible,
for the dream of yesterday is the hope of today
and the reality of tomorrow.
- Robert H. Goddard
No distance of place or lapse of time can lessen the friendship
of those who are thoroughly persuaded of each other's worth.
- Robert Southey
Jealousy is a disease, love is a healthy condition.
The immature mind often mistakes one for the other,
or assumes that the greater the love, the greater the jealousy -
in fact, they're almost incompatible;
one emotion hardly leaves room for the other.
Both at once can produce unbearable turmoil.
- Robert Heinlein
Two roads diverged in a wood, and I ...
I took the one less traveled by,
and that has made all the difference.
- Robert Frost
The greatest test of courage on earth
is to bear defeat without losing heart.
- Robert Ingersoll
What would you attempt to do if you knew you could not fail?
- Robert H. Schuller
A friend is a present you give yourself.
- Robert Louis Stevenson
The fact is, that to do anything in the world worth doing,
we must not stand back shivering and thinking of the cold and danger,
but jump in and scramble through as well as we can.
- Robert Cushing
It isn't the mountain ahead that wears you out;
it's the grain of sand in your shoe.
- Robert W. Service
The size of your success is measured by
the strength of your desire;
the size of your dream;
and how you handle disappointment along the way.
- Robert Kiyosaki
No statement should be believed because it is made by an authority.
- Robert A. Heinlein
The object of education is to prepare the young
to educate themselves throughout their lives.
- Robert M. Hutchins
To know what you prefer
instead of humbly saying Amen
to what the world tells you you ought to prefer,
is to have kept your soul alive.
- Robert Louis Stevenson
The purpose of life is a life of purpose.
- Robert Byrne
When we find someone whose weirdness
is compatible with ours,
we join up with them and fall into
mutually satisfying weirdness -
and call it love - true love.
- Robert Fulghum.
There is no limit to what a man can do
or where he can go,
if he doesn't mind who gets the credit.
- Robert Woodruff
You can give without loving,
but you can never love without giving.
- Robert Louis Stevenson
So long as we are loved by others,
I would almost say that we are indispensable;
and no man is useless while he has a friend.
- Robert Louis Stevenson
But what a cruel thing is war
to separate and destroy families and friends,
and mar the purest joys and happiness
God has granted us in this world,
to fill our hearts with hatred
instead of love for our neighbors,
and to devastate the fair face of this beautiful world!
- Robert E. Lee
Your life is the sum result of all the choices you make,
both consciously and unconsciously. If you can control
the process of choosing, you can take control
of all aspects of your life. You can find the freedom
that comes from being in charge of yourself.
- Robert Foster Bennett
I contend that we are both atheists.
I just believe in one fewer god than you do.
When you understand why you dismiss all the other possible gods,
you will understand why I dismiss yours.
- Stephen Roberts
A friend knows the song in my heart
and sings it to me when my memory fails.
- Donna Roberts
I don't like to commit myself about heaven and hell -
you see, I have friends in both places.
- Mark Twain
Love is what makes two people
sit in the middle of a park bench
when there is plenty of room at both ends.
- Anonymous
It appears to be a law that you cannot have
a deep sympathy with both man and nature.
- Henry David Thoreau
Only a fool tests the depth of the water with both feet.
- African Proverb
Bringing a childlike wonder
and a beginner's mind to life
maximizes both success and joy.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie
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May the world be kind to you,
and may your own thoughts be gentle upon yourself.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie
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