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Let these funny Reporters Quotes from my large collection of funny quotes about life add a little humor to your day.
I believe in equality for everyone,
except reporters and photographers.
- Mohandas (Mahatma) Gandhi
Well, when you come down to it,
I don't see that a reporter could do much to a president, do you?
- Dwight D. Eisenhower
A reporter is always concerned with tomorrow.
There's nothing tangible of yesterday.
All I can say I've done is
agitate the air ten or fifteen minutes
and then boom - it's gone.
- Edward R. Murrow
Well, you ask a silly question, and you get a silly answer.
- Tom Lehrer
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You're already a bastard.
Might as well be an enlightened one.
- the movie Simon Birch
Trust your own instinct.
Your mistakes might as well be your own,
instead of someone else's.
- Billy Wilder
I find that principles have no real force
except when one is well fed.
- Mark Twain
You can always tell when a man's well informed.
His views are pretty much like your own.
- H. Jackson Brown, Jr.
Thank God men cannot fly, and lay waste
the sky as well as the earth.
- Henry David Thoreau
What would be the use of immortality to a person
who cannot use well a half an hour.
- Ralph Waldo Emerson
The length of this document defends it well
against the risk of its being read.
- Winston Churchill
You may as well laugh at life,
because it's certainly laughing at you.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie
Principles have no real force except when one is well-fed.
- Mark Twain
Well excuse me - we've got something
a little unusual going on here -
time travel, parallel universes,
or just a little common ordinary insanity.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie
If everything seems to be going well,
you have obviously overlooked something.
- Anonymous
It's not very heroic to slay dragons.
Dragons are generally very peaceful and well behaved.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie
A little girl at the wedding afterwards asked her mother
why the bride changed her mind.
What do you mean? responded her mother.
Well, she went down the aisle with one man,
and came back with another.
- Anonymous
Trust your own inner guidance.
Have faith that your steps are
carrying you toward your dreams.
Keep your eyes on the heavens
and believe that your feet will carry you well.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie
A well-developed sense of humor
is the pole that adds balance to your steps,
as you walk the tightrope of life.
- William Arthur Ward
Treat the earth well.
It was not given to you by your parents,
it was loaned to you by your children.
We do not inherit the Earth from our Ancestors,
we borrow it from our Children.
- Native American traditional
If a man is called to be a street sweeper,
he should sweep streets even as Michelangelo painted,
or Beethoven composed music, or Shakespeare wrote poetry.
He should sweep streets so well that all the hosts
of heaven and earth will pause to say,
here lived a great street sweeper who did his job well.
- Martin Luther King, Jr.
Hatred is blind, as well as love.
- Oscar Wilde
The simplification of life is one of the steps to inner peace.
A persistent simplification will create an inner and outer well-being
that places harmony in one's life.
- Peace Pilgrim
Hold on... Joyfully.
Holding-on does not have to be
a desperate teeth-gritting kind of holding-on.
Holding-on can be a joyful
"this is just the nature of Life,
so I may as well enjoy it"
kind of holding-on.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie
Live Well, Love Much, Laugh Often.
- Anonymous
Imagine for yourself a character,
a model personality whose example you determine to follow,
in private as well as in public.
- Epictetus
Life is a dangerous - ultimately fatal - endeavor,
so you may as well live it full out.
Chart your course, cast off the lines,
and boldly sail the seas of life.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie
Whatever your life's work is, do it well.
- Martin Luther King, Jr.
Being angry harms your physical,
emotional, and spiritual well-being.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie
Never trust a man who speaks well of everybody
- John Churton Collins
We have nearly complete misunderstanding between
people of different faiths in Lake Wobegon,
and that's probably one reason why we get along so very well.
It's when you are trying to convince another person to think
the same way that you do that there is
friction and trouble between people.
But when you feel that the other person is
dumber than dirt, too dumb for words -
why waste your breath - you get along pretty well.
There's no bond between people that's quite so strong as
when people each feel slightly superior towards the other one.
- Garrison Keillor
Well-behaved women seldom make history.
- Laurel Thatcher Ulrich
If you want something to be different than it is,
you might as well teach a cat to bark.
Wanting something to be different than it is, is hopeless.
- Byron Katie
Rights that do not flow from duty
well performed are not worth having.
- Mohandas (Mahatma) Gandhi
How many things there are concerning which we might
well deliberate whether we had better know them.
- Henry David Thoreau
Heaven is under our feet as well as over our heads.
- Henry David Thoreau
Nobody cares if you can't dance well. Just get up and dance.
- Dave Barry
Treat the earth well,
It was not given to you by your parents,
It was loaned to you by your children.
- Native American Proverb
To the well-organized mind,
death is but the next great adventure.
- J. K. Rowling
Those who can win a war well can rarely make a good peace
and those who could make a good peace
would never have won the war.
- Winston Churchill
Be careful to leave your sons well instructed rather than rich,
for the hopes of the instructed
are better than the wealth of the ignorant.
- Epictetus
No man who is occupied in doing a very difficult thing,
and doing it very well, ever loses his self-respect.
- George Bernard Shaw
I distrust those people who know so well
what God wants them to do,
because I notice it always coincides
with their own desires.
- Susan B. Anthony
Appreciation is a wonderful thing.
It makes what is excellent in others belong to us as well.
- Voltaire
So confident am I in the intentions,
as well as wisdom, of the government,
that I shall always be satisfied that what is not done,
either cannot, or ought not to be done.
- Thomas Jefferson
All's well that ends well.
- Proverb (and title of a Shakespeare play)
Before we acquire great power
we must acquire wisdom to use it well.
- Ralph Waldo Emerson
To live is to choose. But to choose well,
you must know who you are and what you stand for,
where you want to go and why you want to get there.
- Kofi Annan
Learn to do common things uncommonly well;
we must always keep in mind that anything
that helps fill the dinner pail is valuable.
- George Washington Carver
That some achieve great success,
is proof to all that others can achieve it as well.
- Abraham Lincoln
Violence, even well intentioned,
always rebounds upon oneself.
- Lao Tzu
He's my friend that speaks well of me behind my back.
- Thomas Fuller
The best friend is the man who in wishing me well
wishes it for my sake.
- Anonymous
Friendship is not possible between two women
one of whom is very well dressed.
- Laurie Colwin
I was losing interest in politics,
when the repeal of the Missouri Compromise aroused me again.
What I have done since then is pretty well known.
- Abraham Lincoln
Good men must not obey the laws too well.
- Ralph Waldo Emerson
It is well to remember that the
entire population of the universe,
with one trifling exception, is composed of others.
- Andrew J. Holmes
Well-being is making its way to you at all times.
If you will relax and find a way to allow it,
it will be your experience.
- Abraham (Esther Hicks)
Everybody needs beauty as well as bread,
places to play in and pray in,
where nature may heal and cheer
and give strength to the body and soul.
- John Muir
Always aim at complete harmony
of thought and word and deed.
Always aim at purifying your thoughts
and everything will be well.
- Mohandas (Mahatma) Gandhi
There is no point at which you can say,
"Well, I'm successful now.
I might as well take a nap."
- Carrie Fisher
If you can't explain it simply,
you don't understand it well enough.
- Albert Einstein
The part can never be well unless the whole is well.
- Plato
The well-timed question is more impacting than an answer.
- Mary Anne Radmacher
Your point of view sets you up well in advance
for how you view the events as they unfold.
- Mary Anne Radmacher
The opposite of a correct statement is a false statement.
But the opposite of a profound truth may well be another profound truth.
- Niels Bohr
Art for art's sake is a philosophy of the well-fed.
- Frank Lloyd Wright
It is better to travel well than to arrive.
- The Buddha
Life is not about how fast you run
or how high you climb
but how well you bounce.
- Vivian Komori
Character is higher than intellect.
A great soul will be strong to live as well as think.
- Ralph Waldo Emerson
No face which we can give to a matter
will stead us so well at last as the truth.
This alone wears well.
- Henry David Thoreau
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May the world be kind to you,
and may your own thoughts be gentle upon yourself.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie
All materials & writings are copyright © Jonathan Lockwood Huie, except for quotes and other specifically identified material which belong to their respective copyright holders if applicable.