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Funny Reading Quotes
Funny Quotes about Reading

Let these funny Reading Quotes from my large collection of funny quotes about life add a little humor to your day.

Be careful about reading health books.
You may die of a misprint.
- Mark Twain

O Day of days when we can read!
The reader and the book, either without the other is naught.
- Ralph Waldo Emerson

If I read a book that impresses me,
I have to take myself firmly in hand
before I mix with other people;
otherwise they would think my mind rather queer.
- Anne Frank

A truly good book teaches me better than to read it.
I must soon lay it down, and commence living on its hint.
What I began by reading, I must finish by acting.
- Henry David Thoreau


 

Education...
has produced a vast population able to read but unable
to distinguish what is worth reading.
- G. M. Trevelyan

I was reading the dictionary.
I thought it was a poem about everything.
- Steven Wright

Reading computer manuals without the hardware is as
frustrating as reading manuals without the software.
- Arthur C. Clarke


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My reading of history convinces me that most bad government
results from too much government.
- Thomas Jefferson

Reading, after a certain age,
diverts the mind too much from its creative pursuits.
Any man who reads too much and uses his own brain too little
falls into lazy habits of thinking.
- Albert Einstein

Reading builds the educated and informed electorate
so vital to our democracy.
- Brad Henry

The joke in our family is that we can cry reading the phone book.
- Ron Reagan

You don't have to burn books to destroy a culture.
Just get people to stop reading them.
- Mohandas (Mahatma) Gandhi

Leave all the afternoon for exercise and recreation,
which are as necessary as reading.
I will rather say more necessary
because health is worth more than learning.
- Thomas Jefferson

Reading about nature is fine, but if a person
walks in the woods and listens carefully,
he can learn more than what is in books,
for they speak with the voice of God.
- George Washington Carver

Sometimes poetry is inspired by the conversation entered
into by reading other poems.
- John Barton

All of us grow up in particular realities -
a home,
family, a clan, a small town, a neighborhood.
Depending upon how we're brought up,
we are either deeply aware of the particular reading
of reality into which we are born,
or we are peripherally aware of it.
- Chaim Potok

I'm concentrating on staying healthy,
having peace, being happy, remembering what is important,
taking in nature and animals, spending time reading,
trying to understand the universe, where science and the spiritual meet.
- Joan Jett

We are the children of a technological age.
We have found streamlined ways of doing much of our routine work.
Printing is no longer the only way of reproducing books.
Reading them, however, has not changed.
- Lawrence Clark Powell

By reading the scriptures I am so renewed that all
nature seems renewed around me and with me.
The sky seems to be a pure, a cooler blue,
the trees a deeper green.
The whole world is charged with the glory of God and
I feel fire and music under my feet.
- Thomas Merton

Today, like every other day, we wake up empty
and frightened. Don't open the door to the study
and begin reading. Take down a musical instrument.
Let the beauty we love be what we do.
There are hundreds of ways to kneel and kiss the ground.
- Rumi (Persian poet 1207-1273)

In our fathers' time nothing was read but books of feigned chivalry,
wherein a man by reading should be led to none other end,
but only to manslaughter and bawdry.
- Roger Ascham

Much reading is an oppression of the mind,
and extinguishes the natural candle,
which is the reason of so many senseless scholars in the world.
- William Penn

Reading Stephen King's book, On Writing,
was like being cornered and forced to have a long,
drawn out mental enema.
- Mary Garden

In reading plays, however, it should always be remembered that any play,
however great, loses much when not seen in action.
- George P. Baker

Universal literacy was a 20th-century goal.
Before then, reading and writing were skills largely confined to a small,
highly educated class of professional people.
- Hugh Mackay

And I ride horses, swim, do a lot of reading,
writing.
- Casper Van Dien

Between 2 and 5 I'm reading in to find out what's been
going on while I've been asleep.
- Bob Edwards

As you know from reading many of these Negro writers,
we don't deal too much with the discussion of democracy
and what it means and how improvisation fits in all that.
- Stanley Crouch

I fell asleep reading a dull book and dreamed I kept on reading,
so I awoke from sheer boredom.
- Heinrich Heine

He has only half learned the art of reading who has
not added to it the more refined art of skipping and skimming.
- Arthur Balfour

If I don't get the goose-bump factor when I'm reading it than I can't do it.
- Russell Crowe

My mother was right: When you've got nothing left,
all you can do is get into silk underwear and start reading Proust.
- Jane Birkin

Physically I'm tired at the end of the day and quite
glad to be reading in bed by midnight.
- Bob Geldof

I hope to be with you as a writer for a very long time,
and I hope that you will enjoy reading my work,
because readers are the highest form of life on this planet.
- Guy Johnson

I'm still reading some scripts and I model as well,
so I'm still doing that.
But I don't want to do like just anything so we're
being really selective about the stuff I'll do.
- Kim Smith

Reading is an activity subsequent to writing:
more resigned,
more civil, more intellectual.
- Jorge Luis Borges

As a child, what captivated me was reading the poems
myself and realizing that there was a world without
material substance which was nevertheless as alive as any other.
- Mary Oliver

I was at a benefit for some imprisoned students in
the '60s at San Francisco State,
and there were lots of poets reading for the benefit:
one was Elizabeth Bishop.
- Thom Gunn

To feel most beautifully alive means to be reading something beautiful,
ready always to apprehend in the flow of language the sudden flash of poetry.
- John Andrew Holmes

The Spice Girl Victoria Beckham has just published the story of her life.
I confess that it is not in my reading table.
- Mick Jagger

I enjoyed reading all the classic authors like Isaac Asimov and Bradbury.
- William Shatner

I have given up reading books; I find it takes my mind off myself.
- Oscar Levant

As a child, I read science fiction, but from the very
beginnings of my reading for pleasure,
I read a lot of non-fictional history,
particularly historical biography.
- Norman Spinrad

My personal hobbies are reading, listening to music,
and silence.
- Edith Sitwell

Written poetry is worth reading once,
and then should be destroyed.
Let the dead poets make way for others.
- Antonin Artaud

Writing a book for me, I expect, is very similar to
the experience of reading the book for my readers.
- R. A. Salvatore

I have been reading Stephen King since CARRIE and hope
to read him for many years to come.
- Dean Koontz

Reading maketh a full man; conference a ready man;
and writing an exact man.
- Francis Bacon

Mostly, I was only interested in television as a kid,
and the majority of reading material I collected was
an adjunct to that central concern,
comic books and magazines included.
- Chris Ware

I started reading when I was about three,
a little over three.
- Chuck Jones

There's a lot of things that are said on the American Idol message board.
I quit reading them because most of the people are very mean.
- Carrie Underwood

People say that life is the thing, but I prefer reading.
- Logan P. Smith

I hated to read.
My mother could not get me to read.
I'm going through the same thing with my daughter now.
I love to read now, but I don't remember reading.
- Dorothy Hamill

I went into this job to do plays, but that's here for 10 weeks,
and the rest of the year I do a lot of other things-the
administrative work of planning,
reading plays.
- Michael Ritchie

When I decided to take writing seriously,
I did a lot of reading and analyzing of the books I liked,
and came up with what I thought were pretty sound plotting and structure basics.
- George Stephen

I remember when I was in my late teens just getting rid of lots of records,
realizing I only ever listened to them when I was reading,
or watching TV, or doing something else.
- Jonny Greenwood

I thought I'd begin by reading a poem by Shakespeare,
but then I thought, why should I? He never reads any of mine.
- Spike Milligan

Any book that helps a child to form a habit of reading,
to make reading one of his deep and continuing needs,
is good for him.
- Maya Angelou

I am re-reading Henry James as a change from history.
I began with Daisy Miller, and I've just finished Washington Square.
What a brilliant, painful book.
- Antonia Fraser

When I got to the reading all the work,
I was reduced to being an actor in an experimental
play that I'd already written.
And I didn't want to be an actor.
- David Antin

Good stories flow like honey.
Bad stories stick in the craw.
A bad story? One that cannot be absorbed on the first time of reading.
- Arthur Christiansen

I used to live a very social life and never spend much
solitary time looking at birds or reading.
- Lynda Barry

Reading is my greatest luxury.
- Louise Brown

To limit the press is to insult a nation;
to prohibit reading of certain books is to declare
the inhabitants to be either fools or slaves.
- Claud-Adrian Helvetius

In Count Julian I simply proposed to create a text
which would allow for diverse levels of reading.
- Juan Goytisolo

I enjoyed reading as a child.
- Goh C. Tong

You can learn as much about the history from reading
about the present as you can vice versa,
that is learning about the present through history,
which is what I do for a living.
- Ken Burns

A reading man and woman is a ready man and woman,
but a writing man and woman is exact.
- Marcus Garvey

Learning music by reading about it is like making love by mail.
- Luciano Pavarotti

From 7 in the morning to 11 at night,
I was reading.
I don't think one can find any other time in one's
life to be left alone so much to read in peace like that.
- Mohsen Makhmalbaf

I suppose if I was to have to pick a few,
Ursula LeGuin would have to top the list.
It was while reading her work that I decided I wanted to be an author.
- Sarah Zettel


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