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Funny Quotes about Life
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Funny Radio Quotes
Funny Quotes about Radio

Let these funny Radio Quotes from my large collection of funny quotes about life add a little humor to your day.

It's so sweet, I feel like my teeth
are rotting when I listen to the radio.
- Bono

Comedy keeps the heart sweet.
- Mark Twain

Families are like fudge... mostly sweet with a few nuts.
- Anonymous

The holy passion of Friendship is of so sweet
and steady and loyal and enduring a nature
that it will last through a whole lifetime,
if not asked to lend money.
- Mark Twain


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If (s)he's an apple and you're an orange,
celebrate your differences -
make a great fruit salad.
Love isn't about being the same -
it's about being sweet with each other.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie

Self-respect is not a function of size, age, or wealth.
Breathe deep, sing loud and sweet,
"I am me, I am unique, I am magnificent."
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie

Parting is such sweet sorrow.
- William Shakespeare


 

What's in a name? That which we call a rose
by any other name would smell as sweet
- William Shakespeare

Experience life in all possible ways -
good-bad, bitter-sweet, dark-light, summer-winter.
Experience all the dualities.
Don't be afraid of experience,
because the more experience you have,
the more mature you become.
- Osho

May your heart sing sweet lullabies of timelessness.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie

Justice is sweet and musical; but injustice is harsh and discordant.
- Henry David Thoreau

Friendship is always a sweet responsibility,
never an opportunity.
- Khalil Gibran

May your spirit soar throughout the vast cathedral of your being.
May your mind whirl joyful cartwheels of creativity.
May your heart sing sweet lullabies of timelessness.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie

May the world be kind to you,
and may your own thoughts be gentle upon yourself.
May your spirit soar throughout the vast cathedral of your being.
May your mind whirl joyful cartwheels of creativity.
May your heart sing sweet lullabies of timelessness.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie

May your mind whirl joyful cartwheels of creativity.
May your heart sing sweet lullabies of timelessness.
May your essence be the nectar of the open blossom of your joy.
May your spirit soar throughout the vast cathedral of your being.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie

The movie character Forrest Gump describing life
as being "like a box of chocolates,"
is such a positive upbeat way of
characterizing the uncertainty of life.
I have no idea what life will give me next,
but whatever it is, it will be sweet.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie

I take every opportunity to articulate to others
the ways that they have blessed and influenced me.
I hold sweet memories of making the opportunity
to thank teachers who have influenced me.
I encourage everyone to seize opportunities
to tell people who have made a gift of knowledge or influence.
- Mary Anne Radmacher

The Sweetest Strawberry:
A man traveling across a field encountered a tiger.
He fled, the tiger after him.
Coming to a precipice,
he caught hold of the root of a wild vine
and swung himself over the edge.
The tiger sniffed at him from above.
Trembling, the man looked down to where,
far below, another tiger was waiting to eat him.
Only the vine sustained him.
Two mice, one white and one black,
little by little started to gnaw away the vine.
The man then saw a luscious strawberry near him.
Grasping the vine with one hand,
he plucked the strawberry with the other.
How sweet it tasted.
- Zen Koan

Let us celebrate the occasion
with wine and sweet words.
- Plautus

I give you this one thought to keep -
I am with you still - I do not sleep.
I am a thousand winds that blow,
I am the diamond glints on snow,
I am the sunlight on ripened grain,
I am the gentle autumn rain.
When you awaken in the morning's hush,
I am the sweet uplifting rush,
of quiet birds in circled flight.
I am the soft starts that shine at night.
Do not think of me as gone -
I am with you still in each new dawn.
- Traditional Native American Prayer

Literature is my Utopia. Here I am not disenfranchised.
No barrier of the senses shuts me out from
the sweet, gracious discourses of my book friends.
They talk to me without embarrassment or awkwardness.
- Helen Keller

Tragedy is when I cut my finger.
Comedy is when you fall into an open sewer and die.
- Mel Brooks

God writes a lot of comedy... the trouble is,
he's stuck with so many bad actors
who don't know how to play funny.
- Garrison Keillor

Life is not a tragedy, it is a comedy.
To be alive means to have a sense of humor.
- Osho

There's no tragedy in life like the death of a child.
Things never get back to the way they were.
- Dwight D. Eisenhower

The tragedy of life is what dies inside a man while he lives.
- Albert Schweitzer

In human intercourse the tragedy begins,
not when there is misunderstanding about words,
but when silence is not understood.
- Henry David Thoreau

The tragedy of life is not that it ends so soon,
but that we wait so long to begin it.
- Anonymous

The tragedy of life doesn't lie in not reaching your goal.
The tragedy lies in having no goal to reach.
- Benjamin E. Mays

History will have to record that the greatest tragedy
of this period of social transition
was not the strident clamor of the bad people,
but the appalling silence of the good people.
- Martin Luther King, Jr.

You have a choice about the perspective you take on life.
See tragedy, and the world is tragic -
see beauty, and the world is beautiful.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie

The ultimate tragedy is not the oppression
and cruelty by the bad people
but the silence over that by the good people.
- Martin Luther King, Jr.

The courage of life is often a less dramatic spectacle
than the courage of a final moment;
but it is no less a magnificent mixture of triumph and tragedy.
- John F. Kennedy

The effort to understand the universe is one
of the very few things that lifts human life
a little above the level of farce,
and gives it some of the grace of tragedy.
- Steven Weinberg

Be careful not to do your good deeds
when there's no one watching you.
- Tom Lehrer

No one can have a higher opinion of you than I have,
and I think you're a slimy, contemptible sewer rat!
- the movie The Great Mouse Detective

A man's friendships are, like his will,
invalidated by marriage -
but they are also no less invalidated
by the marriage of his friends.
- Samuel Butler

And you just gotta remember, Sparky -
no matter what they tell you - you can NEVER have too much sugar.
- the movie Michael (1996)

No man is truly married until he understands
every word his wife is NOT saying.
- Anonymous

When I eventually met Mr. Right
I had no idea that his first name was Always.
- Rita Rudner

Marriage has no guarantees.
If that's what you're looking for,
go live with a car battery.
- Erma Bombeck

I have no fear of the gallows ... They're going to shoot me.
- the movie Love and Death

Television has a real problem. They have no page two.
- Art Buchwald

Fat, drunk, and stupid is no way to go through life, son.
- the movie National Lampoon's Animal House (1978)

No one knows what's next, but everybody does it.
- George Carlin

Oh no, I can't do anything to the death.
Doctor's orders. You see, I have this ulcer condition,
and death is the worst thing for it.
- the movie Love and Death

No matter how much cats fight,
there always seem to be plenty of kittens.
- Abraham Lincoln

A honeymoon should be like a table:
four bare legs and no drawers.
- Anonymous

There's no reason to become alarmed,
and we hope you'll enjoy the rest of your flight.
By the way, is there anyone on board who knows how to fly a plane?
- the movie Airplane!

One cannot have everything the way he would like it.
A man has no business to be depressed by a disappointment,
anyway; he ought to make up his mind to get even.
- Mark Twain

Mr. President, I'm not saying we wouldn't get our hair mussed.
But I do say no more than ten to twenty million killed, tops.
Uh, depending on the breaks.
- the movie Dr. Strangelove

Early in life I had to choose between honest arrogance
and hypocritical humility.
I chose the former and have seen no reason to change.
- Frank Lloyd Wright

Experience keeps a dear school,
but fools will learn in no other.
- Benjamin Franklin

An excellent man;
he has no enemies;
and none of his friends like him.
- Oscar Wilde

There is no sadder sight than a young pessimist.
- Mark Twain

The fear of death is the most unjustified of all fears,
for there's no risk of accident for someone who's dead.
- Albert Einstein

Principles have no real force except when one is well-fed.
- Mark Twain

There is no such thing as public opinion.
There is only published opinion.
- Winston Churchill

Some people are so heavenly minded
that they are no earthly good.
- Oliver Wendell Holmes, Jr.

It is the things for which there is no evidence
that are believed with passion.
- Bertrand Russell

There is no use whatsoever trying to help
people who do not help themselves.
You cannot push anyone up a ladder
unless he is willing to climb himself.
- Andrew Carnegie

When all think alike, no one is thinking very much.
- Walter Lippmann

I begin with the principle that all men are bores.
Surely no one will prove himself
so great a bore as to contradict me in this.
- Soren Kierkegaard

Random chance seems to have operated in our favor ...
there was no deity involved.
- Spock character in the Star Trek television series

Some things will never seem adequate
no matter how hard we try.
- from the movie White Man's Burden

Computers are like Old Testament gods;
lots of rules and no mercy.
- Joseph Campbell

Do not bite at the bait of pleasure,
till you know there is no hook beneath it.
- Thomas Jefferson

Science may have found a cure for most evils;
but it has found no remedy for the worst of them all -
the apathy of human beings.
- Helen Keller

A clever man commits no minor blunders.
- Johann Wolfgang von Goethe

I once had a rose named after me
and I was very flattered.
But I was not pleased to read
the description in the catalogue:
no good in a bed, but fine up against a wall.
- Eleanor Roosevelt

It's not the men in your life that counts,
it's the life in your men.
- Mae West, in the movie I'm No Angel


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May the world be kind to you,
and may your own thoughts be gentle upon yourself.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie


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