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Let these funny Protection Quotes from my large collection of funny quotes about life add a little humor to your day.
On life's journey, faith is nourishment,
virtuous deeds are a shelter,
wisdom is the light by day
and right mindfulness is the protection by night.
If a man lives a pure life, nothing can destroy him.
- The Buddha
Because we fear the responsibility for our actions,
we have allowed ourselves to develop the mentality of slaves.
Contrary to the stirring sentiments of the Declaration of Independence,
we now pledge "our Lives, our Fortunes and our sacred Honor"
not to one another for our mutual protection, but to the state,
whose actions continue to exploit, despoil, and destroy us.
- Butler D. Shaffer
Protect your vision.
Prevail over adversity.
Persevere in the midst of turmoil.
Passionately act upon your convictions.
Purposely walk into the day.
- Mary Anne Radmacher
The power of intuitive understanding
will protect you from harm until the end of your days.
- Lao Tzu
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Age does not protect you from love.
But love, to some extent, protects you from age.
- Anais Nin
Though force can protect in emergency,
only justice, fairness, consideration and cooperation
can finally lead men to the dawn of eternal peace.
- Dwight D. Eisenhower
The will of God will never take you
to where the grace of God will not protect you.
- Anonymous
The strongest reason for the people
to retain the right to keep and bear arms is,
as a last resort, to protect themselves
against tyranny in government.
- Thomas Jefferson
Politics ought to be the part-time profession of every citizen
who would protect the rights and privileges of free people
and who would preserve what is
good and fruitful in our national heritage.
- Dwight D. Eisenhower
All, too, will bear in mind this sacred principle,
that though the will of the majority is in all cases to prevail,
that will to be rightful must be reasonable;
that the minority possess their equal rights,
which equal law must protect, and to violate would be oppression.
- Thomas Jefferson
Love is patient, love is kind.
It does not envy, it does not boast,
It is not proud. It does not dishonor others,
It is not self-seeking, it is not easily angered,
It keeps no record of wrongs.
Love does not delight in evil
but rejoices with the truth.
It always protects, always trusts,
always hopes, always perseveres.
Love never fails.
- Corinthians 13:4-8 (NIV)
Just as courage imperils life, fear protects it.
- Leonardo da Vinci
To a very young child, mommy and daddy are gods.
We spend our lives looking to regain
that sense of being cared for and protected.
Thus religion.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie
Rather than worrying about the continuous stream of potential threats,
let us give thanks for our blessing of living in the eye-of-the-storm -
our protected refuge from the terrors
of fearsome dangers just outside our lives.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie
We return thanks to our mother,
the earth, which sustains us.
We return thanks to the rivers and streams
which supply us with water.
We return thanks to all herbs, which furnish medicines
for the cure of our diseases.
We return thanks to the corn, and to her sisters,
the beans and squashes, which give us life.
We return thanks to the bushes and trees,
which provide us with fruit.
We return thanks to the wind,
which, moving the air, has banished diseases.
We return thanks to the moon and the stars,
which have given us their light when the sun was gone.
We return thanks to our grandfather He-no,
that he has protected his grandchildren from witches and reptiles,
and has given us his rain.
We return thanks to the sun,
that he has looked upon the earth with a beneficent eye.
Lastly, we return thanks to the Great Spirit,
in whom is embodied all goodness,
and who directs all things for the good of his children.
- Iroquois traditional
We must not reduce the bosom of the universal church
to a nest protecting our mediocrity.
- Pope Francis
Why does a woman work ten years to change a man's habits
and then complain that he's not the man she married?
- Barbra Streisand
If you are not one of us, you are one of them.
- the movie The Matrix (1999)
Live life on the edge, not with an edge.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie
Be careful not to do your good deeds
when there's no one watching you.
- Tom Lehrer
It's not the size of the dog in the fight,
it's the size of the fight in the dog.
- Mark Twain
"It's not that important,
don't worry about it" is the answer,
now what was the question?
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie
In order to be happy with a man,
you must understand him a lot and love him a little.
To be happy with a woman, you must love her a lot
and not try to understand her at all.
- Helen Rowland
One does not leave a convivial party before closing time.
- Winston Churchill
DON'T get officious.
You're not yourself when you're officious -
That is the curse of a government job.
- the movie Harold and Maude (1971)
It's not the men in your life that counts,
it's the life in your men.
- Mae West, in the movie I'm No Angel
If at first you don't succeed,
skydiving is not for you.
- Anonymous
Yield to temptation. It may not pass your way again.
- Robert A. Heinlein
It's not as great a day for the bride as she thinks.
She's not marrying the best man.
- Anonymous
I'm not used to feeling so human.
Is it always like this?
- Edward, from Twilight Saga by Stephenie Meyer
Mr. President, I'm not saying we wouldn't get our hair mussed.
But I do say no more than ten to twenty million killed, tops.
Uh, depending on the breaks.
- the movie Dr. Strangelove
No man is truly married until he understands
every word his wife is NOT saying.
- Anonymous
I care not much for a man's religion
whose dog and cat are not the better for it.
- Abraham Lincoln
When you fish for love, bait with your heart, not your brain.
- Mark Twain
Two things are infinite:
the universe and human stupidity;
and I'm not sure about the universe.
- Albert Einstein
Do not marry a man to reform him.
That is what reform schools are for.
- Mae West
The most important words in the English language
are not "I love you" but "It's benign."
- the Woody Allen movie Deconstructing Harry
I'm not a complete idiot, some parts are missing.
- Anonymous
Yeah I called her up. She gave me a bunch of ...
about me not listening to her, or something.
I don't know, I wasn't really paying attention.
- the movie Dumb & Dumber (1994)
Damn it boss, I like you too much not to say it.
You've got everything except one thing: madness!
- the movie Zorba The Greek
I'm not talking about lust.
A woman in lust wants chocolate.
A woman in love wants diamonds.
- the movie How to Lose a Guy in 10 Days
Be thankful we're not getting all the government we're paying for.
- Will Rogers
Marriage is a fine institution -
but I'm not ready for an institution yet.
- Mae West
Personally, I'm always ready to learn,
although I do not always like being taught.
- Winston Churchill
Women marry men hoping they will change.
Men marry women hoping they will not.
- Albert Einstein
Gravitation is not responsible for people falling in love.
- Albert Einstein
Never argue at the dinner table, for the one who is not hungry
always gets the best of the argument.
- Voltaire
The key is, to not think of death as an end,
but as more of a very effective way to cut down on your expenses.
- the movie Love and Death
Time you enjoy wasting, was not wasted.
- John Lennon
Politics is such a torment that I advise everyone
I love not to mix with it.
- Thomas Jefferson
Silence is not always a Sign of Wisdom,
but Babbling is ever a folly.
- Benjamin Franklin
The trouble with the world is not
that people know too little,
but that they know so many things that ain't so.
- Mark Twain
Do not use a hatchet to remove
a fly from your friend's forehead.
- Chinese Proverb
Do not bite at the bait of pleasure,
till you know there is no hook beneath it.
- Thomas Jefferson
A ship in harbor is safe -
but that is not what ships are for.
- John A. Shedd
As far as the laws of mathematics
refer to reality, they are not certain,
and as far as they are certain,
they do not refer to reality.
- Albert Einstein
People who say it cannot be done should not
interrupt those who are doing it.
- George Bernard Shaw
The rich are not born skeptical or cynical.
They are made that way by events, circumstances.
- Paul Getty
I want to be the white man's brother, not his brother-in-law.
- Martin Luther King, Jr.
I am not afraid of storms
for I am learning how to sail my ship.
- Louisa May Alcott
Only two things are infinite,
the universe and human stupidity,
and I'm not sure about the former.
- Albert Einstein
It's not clutter, it's my unique filing system.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie
The most difficult phase of life
is not when no one understands you,
it is when you don't understand yourself.
- Anonymous
The church is always trying to get other people to reform;
it might not be a bad idea to reform itself a little,
by way of example.
- Mark Twain
I am not young enough to know everything.
- Oscar Wilde
For those who do not think,
it is best at least to rearrange
their prejudices once in a while.
- Luther Burbank
Although personally I am quite content with existing explosives,
I feel we must not stand in the path of improvement.
- Winston Churchill
It's not a mess.
It's a physical manifestation of
a wonderfully complex ability to
assess and compartmentalize information.
- Mary Anne Radmacher
There is no use whatsoever trying to help
people who do not help themselves.
You cannot push anyone up a ladder
unless he is willing to climb himself.
- Andrew Carnegie
It's not much of a tail, but I'm sort of attached to it.
- A. A. Milne (Winnie-The-Pooh)
Feeling sorry for yourself, and your present condition,
is not only a waste of energy
but the worst habit you could possibly have.
- Dale Carnegie
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May the world be kind to you,
and may your own thoughts be gentle upon yourself.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie
All materials & writings are copyright © Jonathan Lockwood Huie, except for quotes and other specifically identified material which belong to their respective copyright holders if applicable.