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Let these funny Prescribed Quotes from my large collection of funny quotes about life add a little humor to your day.
My rule of life prescribed as an absolutely sacred rite
smoking cigars and also the drinking of alcohol
before, after and if need be during all meals
and in the intervals between them.
- Winston Churchill
Many of us have been conditioned to trust others' opinions
more than our own, and I believe that sort of trust is excessive.
This is especially true with regard to authority figures -
doctors, lawyers, priests. I trust my doctor's intentions toward me,
but I don't blindly follow his suggestions
without checking other sources also.
He was trained to prescribe a pill for everything,
and does it with the best of intentions,
but I often choose to trust God's quiet voice inside me
rather than my doctor's medical advice.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie
God writes a lot of comedy... the trouble is,
he's stuck with so many bad actors
who don't know how to play funny.
- Garrison Keillor
The Lord prefers common-looking people.
That is why he makes so many of them.
- Abraham Lincoln
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The claim "I was only following orders" has been used
to justify too many tragedies in our history.
- Captain Picard of the television series
STAR TREK: The Next Generation
Common looking people are the best in the world:
that is the reason the Lord makes so many of them.
- Abraham Lincoln
The trouble with the world is not
that people know too little,
but that they know so many things that ain't so.
- Mark Twain
How many legs does a dog have
if you call the tail a leg? Four.
Calling a tail a leg doesn't make it a leg.
- Abraham Lincoln
Ennui has made more gamblers than avarice,
more drunkards than thirst,
and perhaps as many suicides as despair.
- The Buddha
To steal ideas from one person is plagiarism.
To steal from many is research.
- Anonymous
God must love the common man, he made so many of them.
- Abraham Lincoln
I have spent many years of my life in opposition,
and I rather like the role.
- Eleanor Roosevelt
Many a man owes his success to his first wife
and his second wife to his success.
- Jim Backus
"The time has come," the walrus said, "to talk of many things:
of shoes and ships - and sealing wax - of cabbages and kings."
- Lewis Carroll
Politics is almost as exciting as war, and quite as dangerous.
In war you can only be killed once, but in politics many times.
- Winston Churchill
Bigamy is having one wife too many. Monogamy is the same.
- Oscar Wilde
Too many people spend money they haven't earned,
to buy things they don't want,
to impress people they don't like.
- Will Rogers
Sometimes I've believed as many as
six impossible things before breakfast.
- Lewis Carroll
Life is defined more by its contrasts than its samenesses;
Life is defined more by its risks than the many securities.
- Mary Anne Radmacher
Why, sometimes I've believed as many as
six impossible things before breakfast.
- Lewis Carroll
CALM IN CHAOS
In the midst of the flurry - clarity.
In the midst of the storm - calm.
In the midst of divided interests - certainty.
In the many roads - a certain choice.
- Mary Anne Radmacher
However many holy words you read, however many you speak,
what good will they do you if you do not act on upon them?
- The Buddha
Misery nourishes your ego -
that's why you see so many miserable people in the world.
The basic, central point is the ego.
- Osho
There is no easy walk to freedom anywhere,
and many of us will have to pass
through the valley of the shadow of death
again and again before we reach
the mountaintop of our desires.
- Nelson Mandela
The chief danger in life is that you may take too many precautions.
- Alfred Adler
Each man's life touches so many other lives.
- It's a Wonderful Life (1946 movie)
Cowards die many times before their deaths;
The valiant never taste of death but once.
- William Shakespeare
I hear many people talk about their longing for a balanced life.
What I think they are really expressing
is a desire for a life with less pressure.
- Mary Anne Radmacher
Life is like dancing.
If we have a big floor, many people will dance.
Some will get angry when the rhythm changes.
But life is changing all the time.
- don Miguel Ruiz
Too many of us look upon Americans as dollar chasers.
This is a cruel libel, even if it is reiterated
thoughtlessly by the Americans themselves.
- Albert Einstein
Many societies have educated their male children
on the simple device of teaching them not to be women.
- Margaret Mead
Many of life's failures are people who did not realize
how close they were to success when they gave up.
- Thomas Edison
Never in the field of human conflict
was so much owed by so many to so few.
- Winston Churchill
Those who dream by day are cognizant of many things
which escape those who dream only by night.
- Edgar Allen Poe
Many people allow their need
for other people's approval to control their lives.
They spend their lives worrying about what others think of them.
- Rick Warren
In war, you can only be killed once,
but in politics, many times.
- Winston Churchill
All that glisters is not gold;
Often have you heard that told.
Many a man his life hath sold
but my outside to behold.
Gilded tombs do worms enfold.
- William Shakespeare
There are many answers you have received
but have not yet heard.
- A Course In Miracles
Many receive advice, only the wise profit from it.
- Publilius Syrus
Too many people are thinking of security
instead of opportunity.
They seem more afraid of life than death.
- James F. Bymes
I have the right to love many people at once
and to change my prince often.
- Anais Nin
We are not to give credit to the many,
who say that none ought to be educated but the free;
but rather to the philosophers,
who say that the well-educated alone are free.
- Epictetus
Faith is the highest passion in a human being.
Many in every generation may not come that far, but none comes further.
- Soren Kierkegaard
Many men go fishing all of their lives
without knowing that it is not fish they are after.
- Henry David Thoreau
Many people love in themselves what they hate in others.
- E. F. Schumacher
Many persons have a wrong idea of
what constitutes true happiness.
It is not attained through self-gratification
but through fidelity to a worthy purpose.
- Helen Keller
Among the many misdeeds of the British rule in India,
history will look upon the act of
depriving a whole nation of arms as the blackest.
- Mohandas (Mahatma) Gandhi
The beauty of facing life unprepared is tremendous.
Then life has a newness, a youth;
then life has a flow and freshness.
Then life has so many surprises.
And when life has so many surprises,
boredom never settles in you.
- Osho
After climbing a great hill,
one only finds that there are many more hills to climb.
- Nelson Mandela
There are many ways to be free. One of them is to transcend
reality by imagination, as I try to do.
- Anais Nin
Most of the luxuries, and many of the so-called comforts of life
are not only not indispensable,
but positive hindrances to the elevation of mankind.
- Henry David Thoreau
If you call a tail a leg, how many legs has a dog?
Five? No, calling a tail a leg don't make it a leg.
- Abraham Lincoln
There are as many pillows of illusion
as flakes in a snow-storm.
We wake from one dream into another dream.
- Ralph Waldo Emerson
The only good luck many great men ever had was
being born with the ability and determination to overcome bad luck.
- Channing Pollock
Loneliness is not what it seems.
One does not feel lonely because one is alone,
but because of a feeling of lack -
a feeling that something is missing.
Loneliness is essentially independent
of how many other humans are around.
It has much more to do with one's self-esteem -
one's sense of inherent worth.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie
A successful marriage requires falling in love many times,
always with the same person.
- Germaine Greer
Many hands make light work.
- Proverb
All the great things are simple,
and many can be expressed in a single word:
freedom, justice, honor, duty, mercy, hope.
- Winston Churchill
We know but a few men, a great many coats and breeches.
- Henry David Thoreau
Just because it's true, I say as often as I can
in as many ways as I can form, "I sure love you."
- Mary Anne Radmacher
As many raindrops join to form a great river of water,
many souls join their highest intent to form
the river of evolved consciousness.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie
A man can fail many times,
but he isn't a failure until
he begins to blame somebody else.
- John Burroughs
Truth is not defined by
how many people believe something.
Ask. Question. Think.
Decide - for yourself.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie
Celebration has many different outfits
but she always wears the same beautiful dancing shoes.
- Mary Anne Radmacher
Many important things shouldn't be done half-way.
Think of getting married, having children,
starting a business, changing your career.
There are times to gather your courage
and make the leap, the whole leap.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie
The True Surprise is that
So Many of Us have Evolved So Rapidly.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie
As every divided kingdom falls,
so every mind divided between
many studies confounds and saps itself.
- Leonardo da Vinci
Facts are many, but the truth is one.
- Rabindranath Tagore
How many things there are concerning which we might
well deliberate whether we had better know them.
- Henry David Thoreau
Don't give up. There are too many nay-sayers out there
who will try to discourage you.
Don't listen to them.
The only one who can make you give up is yourself.
- Sidney Sheldon
Many people excuse their own faults
but judge other persons harshly.
We should reverse this attitude
by excusing others' shortcomings
and by harshly examining our own.
- Paramahansa Yogananda
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May the world be kind to you,
and may your own thoughts be gentle upon yourself.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie
All materials & writings are copyright © Jonathan Lockwood Huie, except for quotes and other specifically identified material which belong to their respective copyright holders if applicable.