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Funny Quotes about Life
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Funny Polka Quotes
Funny Quotes about Polka

Let these funny Polka Quotes from my large collection of funny quotes about life add a little humor to your day.

I ride my blue polka-dot horse through the byways of life.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie

Fasten your safety belts, clench your buttocks!
It's going be a bumpy ride!
- the movie Harry Potter and the Prisoner of Azkaban (2004)

Hitch a Ride on the River of Life.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie

Life ain't always beautiful,
but it's a beautiful ride.
- Gary Allen


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I ride the storm - cheering wildly.
I gather strength from the storm.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie

Ride the storm. Cheer wildly.
Gather strength from life's storms.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie

My wish is to ride the tempest, tame the waves.
- Trieu Thi Trinh


 

Life is a grand adventure - enjoy the ride.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie

Lots of people want to ride with you in the limo,
but what you want is someone who will take the bus with you
when the limo breaks down.
- Oprah Winfrey

Love doesn't make the world go 'round,
Love is what makes the ride worthwhile.
- Franklin P. Jones

Ride With the Devil.
- Jewel

A man can't ride your back unless it's bent.
- Martin Luther King, Jr.

Life should not be a journey to the grave
with the intention of arriving safely
in a pretty and well preserved body,
but rather to skid in broadside in a cloud of smoke,
thoroughly used up, totally worn out,
and loudly proclaiming, "Wow! What a Ride!"
- Hunter S. Thompson

There is no doubt that life can be a bumpy ride.
But so were those roller coasters you loved as a kid.
Savor the adventure.
Find excitement in the uncertainty and the constant change.
Even let a touch of fear add spice to your life -
as you did on that roller coaster.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie

Change does not roll in on the wheels of inevitability,
but comes through continuous struggle.
And so we must straighten our backs and work for our freedom.
A man can't ride you unless your back is bent.
- Martin Luther King, Jr.

Trust:
Perhaps you trust your doctor,
your lawyer, your boss - perhaps not.
Perhaps you trust in a "Higher Power" - perhaps you don't.
Trust is something that we become aware of in unusual situations,
such as a once-in-a-lifetime ride on a zip-line,
but most of the time, we become oblivious
to the trust we have, or don't have.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie

I love being married.
It's so great to find that one special person
you want to annoy for the rest of your life.
- Rita Rudner

Be careful not to do your good deeds
when there's no one watching you.
- Tom Lehrer

The secret to creativity is knowing how to hide your sources.
- Albert Einstein

Yield to temptation. It may not pass your way again.
- Robert A. Heinlein

When your friends begin to flatter
you on how young you look,
it's a sure sign you're getting old.
- Mark Twain

Crazy is walking down the street
with half a cantaloupe on your head,
muttering; "I'm a hamster, I'm a hamster."
- the movie Spy Hard (1996)

Look your best - who said love is blind?
- Mae West

Here's a toast to your new bride who has everything a girl
could want in her life, except for good taste in men.
- Anonymous

(Groom), take (Bride)'s hand and place your hand over hers.
Now, remember this moment and cherish it...
because this will be the last time you ever have the upper hand.
- Anonymous

It is a truth universally acknowledged that
when one part of your life starts going okay,
another falls spectacularly to pieces.
- the movie Bridget Jones Diary

When everything comes your way
you're in the wrong lane.
- Anonymous

Always forgive your enemies -
nothing annoys them so much.
- Oscar Wilde

Marriage is like putting your hand into a bag of snakes
in the hope of pulling out an eel.
- Leonardo da Vinci

Now, if you don't mind, I'd appreciate it if you could lower your wand.
- the movie Harry Potter and the Prisoner of Azkaban

The key is, to not think of death as an end,
but as more of a very effective way to cut down on your expenses.
- the movie Love and Death

To keep your marriage brimming,
With love in the wedding cup,
Whenever you're wrong, admit it;
Whenever you're right, shut up.
- Ogden Nash

New Yorkers love it when you spill your guts out there.
Spill your guts at Wimbledon and they make you stop and clean it up.
- Jimmy Carter

When you fish for love, bait with your heart, not your brain.
- Mark Twain

Will the people in the cheaper seats clap your hands?
And the rest of you, if you'll just rattle your jewelry.
- John Lennon

It's not the men in your life that counts,
it's the life in your men.
- Mae West, in the movie I'm No Angel

A friend will tell you she saw your old boyfriend -
and he's a priest.
- Erma Bombeck

There's no reason to become alarmed,
and we hope you'll enjoy the rest of your flight.
By the way, is there anyone on board who knows how to fly a plane?
- the movie Airplane!

In life you are given two ends;
one to think with and the other to sit on.
Your success in life depends on which end you use most.
Heads you win, tails you lose.
- Conrad Burns

When life gets you down -
just put on your big girl panties and deal with it.
- Anonymous humor

What If Every Day Were Your Day -
Celebrate Whimsey Today.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie

Just remember, after they foreclose on your mortgage,
you get a lot more sunshine in your life.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie

Life is serious, get out your magic wand.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie

Never try to teach a pig to sing.
It wastes your time, and it annoys the pig.
- Mark Twain

A true friend is one who
overlooks your failures
and tolerates your success.
- Doug Larson

To go against the dominant thinking of your friends,
of most of the people you see every day,
is perhaps the most difficult act of heroism you can perform.
- Theodore H. White

Choose to soar. Choose to fly your dreams.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie

You know your god is man-made when he
hates all the same people you do.
- Anonymous

Keep your eyes wide open before marriage, half shut afterwards.
- Benjamin Franklin

Let your sympathies and your compassion
be always with the under dog in the fight -
this is magnanimity;
but bet on the other one - this is business.
- Mark Twain

I don't advise a haircut, man.
All hairdressers are in the employment of the government.
Hairs are your aerials.
They pick up signals from the cosmos,
and transmit them directly into the brain.
This is the reason bald-headed men are uptight.
- the movie Withnail & I

Stay Happy, never let anyone get your goat.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie

Grit ruins clam chowder,
but enhances your character.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie

You are Never Too Old to Give or Get Gold Stars.
Show Your Honest Appreciation - Today.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie

Never let the fear of striking out get in your way.
- Babe Ruth

As you awaken,
may your dreams greet you by name,
and may you answer, "Yes!"
- Mary Anne Radmacher

True love comes quietly,
without banners or flashing lights.
If you hear bells, get your ears checked.
- Erich Segal

Don't underestimate your abilities,
that's your boss's job.
- Anonymous

Powerful Dreams Inspire Powerful Action.
When you can taste, smell, and touch your dreams,
you can enroll the world.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie

A wedding is just like a funeral
except that you get to smell your own flowers.
- Grace Hansen

God Loves an Open Mind, Clean Hands, and a Loving Heart.
So does Your Mother.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie

Keep your friends close, but your enemies closer.
- the movie The Godfather, Part II

Though I am a servant, I am not your servant.
- Ursula K. Le Guin

Remember, if you ever need a helping hand,
you'll find one at the end of your arm.
- Audrey Hepburn

Trust your own instinct.
Your mistakes might as well be your own,
instead of someone else's.
- Billy Wilder

Sometimes I lie awake at night and ask "Why me?"
Then a voice answers "Nothing personal,
your name just happened to come up. -
- Charlie Brown, in Charles M. Schulz' cartoon Peanuts

Heaven must be an awfully dull place
if your best friends end up elsewhere.
- Anonymous

This is your day to Laugh at Life.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie

The best way to appreciate your job
is to imagine yourself without one.
- Oscar Wilde

Put your hand on a hot stove for a minute and it
seems like an hour. Sit with a pretty girl for an hour
and it seems like a minute. That's relativity.
- Albert Einstein

Knowing your own darkness is the best method
for dealing with the darknesses of other people.
- Carl Jung


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May the world be kind to you,
and may your own thoughts be gentle upon yourself.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie


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All materials & writings are copyright © Jonathan Lockwood Huie, except for quotes and other specifically identified material which belong to their respective copyright holders if applicable.