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Let these funny Personal Quotes from my large collection of funny quotes about life add a little humor to your day.
Sometimes I lie awake at night and ask "Why me?"
Then a voice answers "Nothing personal,
your name just happened to come up. -
- Charlie Brown, in Charles M. Schulz' cartoon Peanuts
Everything we say, do, think, and feel
is a product of our personal history
and the collective history of humankind.
Our name for these histories is "prejudice."
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie
Having a personal opinion is great.
Believing that one's personal opinion is absolute truth
leads to most of the world's troubles.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie
The personal life deeply lived
always expands into truths beyond itself.
- Anais Nin
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My biggest dream is that my words will inspire heart,
hope and personal responsibility in people around the globe
long after my feet in these shoes aren't walking the planet.
- Mary Anne Radmacher
A man does what he must - in spite of personal consequences,
in spite of obstacles and dangers and pressures -
and that is the basis of all human morality.
- John F. Kennedy
Belief transcends ritual, structure and societal expectation.
It is an enlivening, intensely personal
core to our being. Our way of being.
- Mary Anne Radmacher
Pity may represent little more
than the impersonal concern
which prompts the mailing of a check,
but true sympathy is the personal concern
which demands the giving of one's soul.
- Martin Luther King, Jr.
Set and enforce your personal boundaries.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie
Be Your Own Personal Greatest Hero.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie
Man must cease attributing his problems to his environment,
and learn again to exercise his will - his personal responsibility
in the realm of faith and morals.
- Albert Schweitzer
I know, to banish anger altogether
from one's breast is a difficult task.
It cannot be achieved through pure personal effort.
It can be done only by God's grace.
- Mohandas (Mahatma) Gandhi
I put aside personal preferences and step forward to be of service.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie
Personal transformation can and does have global effects.
As we go, so goes the world, for the world is us.
The revolution that will save the world
is ultimately a personal one.
- Marianne Williamson
I left the "eye for an eye" God
when I walked out of Bible school,
but God Within is a daily part of my personal experience.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie
About most subjects, there is not "The Truth;"
there is merely one's personal truth.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie
Get up-close-and-personal:
Life looks different when you really get involved.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie
Whosoever is spared personal pain
must feel himself called
to help in diminishing the pain of others.
We must all carry our share of
the misery which lies upon the world.
- Albert Schweitzer
Personal importance, or taking things personally,
is the maximum expression of selfishness
because we make the assumption that everything is about me.
- don Miguel Ruiz
When you pray for anyone, you tend to
modify your personal attitude toward them.
- Norman Vincent Peale
The less I take the difficulties of my life as personal affront,
and the more I use them as an opportunity to learn and grow...
the easier I sleep at night.
- Mary Anne Radmacher
Buddhism has the characteristics of what would be expected
in a cosmic religion for the future:
It transcends a personal God, avoids dogmas and theology;
it covers both the natural and the spiritual,
and it is based on a religious sense
aspiring from the experience of all things,
natural and spiritual, as a meaningful unity.
- Albert Einstein
I am the owner of my choices.
I am the source for the perspectives I choose to hold...
regardless of how aware I am of why or how I come to possess
that particular perspective.
It takes courage to look into the mirror of our souls, absent excuses.
I will look into that mirror little bits at a time.
SEE and ACT. SEE what I can bear to see and ACT upon what I am able.
This is the heart of a gentle invitation to personal responsibility.
- Mary Anne Radmacher
We all have a social mask, right?
We put it on, we go out, put our
best foot forward, our best image.
But behind that social mask is a personal truth,
what we really, really believe
about who we are and what we're capable of.
- Phil McGraw
Property is intended to serve life,
and no matter how much we surround it with rights and respect,
it has no personal being.
It is part of the earth man walks on.
It is not man.
- Martin Luther King, Jr.
Don't aim at success.
The more you aim at it and make it a target,
the more you are going to miss it.
For success, like happiness, cannot be pursued;
it must ensue, and it only does so as
the unintended side effect of one's personal dedication
to a cause greater than oneself.
- Viktor E. Frankl
Purity of personal life is the one indispensable condition
for building up a sound education.
- Mohandas (Mahatma) Gandhi
I love being married.
It's so great to find that one special person
you want to annoy for the rest of your life.
- Rita Rudner
The only fool bigger than the person who knows it all
is the person who argues with him.
- Stanislaw Jerszy Lec
I've become the person I've always hated, but I'm happier.
- the Woody Allen movie Celebrity
Tell me about a person's family, friends, and community,
and I'll tell you what his opinions are.
- Mark Twain
(paraphrase)
Credit is a system whereby a person who can't pay
gets another person who can't pay
to guarantee that he can pay.
- Charles Dickens
The person who says it cannot be done
should not interrupt the person who is doing it.
- Chinese proverb
And you, Sonja, you look more beautiful
standing here than you do in person.
- the movie Love and Death (1975)
What would be the use of immortality to a person
who cannot use well a half an hour.
- Ralph Waldo Emerson
A person who never made a mistake
never tried anything new.
- Albert Einstein
Inside every cynical person,
there is a disappointed idealist.
- George Carlin
I can't go back to yesterday -
because I was a different person then.
- Lewis Carroll
To steal ideas from one person is plagiarism.
To steal from many is research.
- Anonymous
What sane person could live in this world and not be crazy?
- Ursula K. Le Guin
Think of how stupid the average person is,
and realize half of them are stupider than that.
- George Carlin
Friendship is born at that moment
when one person says to another,
"What! You too? I thought I was the only one."
- C. S. Lewis
Love is when the other person's happiness
is more important than your own.
- H. Jackson Brown, Jr.
Man is least himself when he talks in his own person.
Give him a mask, and he will tell you the truth.
- Oscar Wilde
A person is smart. People are dumb,
panicky dangerous animals and you know it.
Fifteen hundred years ago everybody knew
the Earth was the center of the universe.
Five hundred years ago,
everybody knew the Earth was flat,
and fifteen minutes ago,
you knew that humans were alone on this planet.
Imagine what you'll know tomorrow.
- the movie Men in Black
Resenting someone is a way of never leaving that person.
- Kare Anderson
The most pathetic person in the world
is someone who has sight, but has no vision.
- Helen Keller
A competent and self-confident person is
incapable of jealousy in anything.
Jealousy is invariably a symptom of neurotic insecurity.
- Robert A. Heinlein
It hurts to love someone
and not be loved in return,
but what is more painful is to love
someone and never find the courage
to let that person know how you feel.
- Anonymous
It takes a long while for a naturally trustful person
to reconcile himself to the idea that
after all God will not help him
- H. L. Mencken
If the person you are talking to doesn't appear to be listening, be patient.
It may simply be that he has a small piece of fluff in his ear.
- A. A. Milne (Winnie-The-Pooh)
The shoe that fits one person pinches another;
there is no recipe for living that suits all cases.
- Carl Jung
Resenting someone, or hating someone, ensures that
you can never emotionally escape that person.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie
Good for who? Good for what?
There is no absolute "good."
"Good" is simply one person's preference.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie
The moment a person forms a theory,
his imagination sees in every object
only the traits which favor that theory.
- Thomas Jefferson
If one does not understand a person,
one tends to regard him as a fool.
- Carl Jung
The person who you're with most in life is yourself
and if you don't like yourself,
you're always with somebody you don't like.
- Marc S. Lewis
We have nearly complete misunderstanding between
people of different faiths in Lake Wobegon,
and that's probably one reason why we get along so very well.
It's when you are trying to convince another person to think
the same way that you do that there is
friction and trouble between people.
But when you feel that the other person is
dumber than dirt, too dumb for words -
why waste your breath - you get along pretty well.
There's no bond between people that's quite so strong as
when people each feel slightly superior towards the other one.
- Garrison Keillor
A person who trusts no one can't be trusted.
- Jerome Blattner
An unclean person is universally a slothful one.
- Henry David Thoreau
No person was ever honored for what he received.
Honor has been the reward for what he gave.
- Calvin Coolidge
Never say goodbye when you still want to try,
never give up when you still feel you can't take it.
Never say you don't love the person anymore
when you can't let go.
- Anonymous
It was high counsel that I once heard given to a young person,
"Always do what you are afraid to do."
- Ralph Waldo Emerson
We know what a person thinks not when he tells us
what he thinks, but by his actions.
- Isaac Bashevis Singe
Being unwanted, unloved, uncared for, forgotten by everybody,
I think that is a much greater hunger,
a much greater poverty than the person who has nothing to eat.
- Mother Teresa
Jealousy is that pain which a man feels
from the apprehension that he is not equally beloved
by the person whom he entirely loves.
- Joseph Addison
Truth is absolute, but only to one person.
My truth is absolute to me, and your truth is absolute to you.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie
There is an optical illusion about every person we meet.
- Ralph Waldo Emerson
A person isn't who they are during
the last conversation you had with them -
they're who they've been
throughout your whole relationship.
- Rainer Maria Rilke
We are afraid to care too much, for fear
that the other person does not care at all.
- Eleanor Roosevelt
About leadership: No person can be a great leader
unless he takes genuine joy
in the successes of those under him.
- W. A. Nance
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May the world be kind to you,
and may your own thoughts be gentle upon yourself.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie
All materials & writings are copyright © Jonathan Lockwood Huie, except for quotes and other specifically identified material which belong to their respective copyright holders if applicable.