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Let these funny Perished Quotes from my large collection of funny quotes about life add a little humor to your day.
If God listened to the prayers of men,
all men would quickly have perished:
for they are forever praying for evil against one another.
- Epicurus
Government of the people,
by the people,
for the people,
shall not perish from this Earth.
- Abraham Lincoln
We must learn to live together as brothers
or perish together as fools.
- Martin Luther King, Jr.
If the Great Way perishes, there will be morality and duty.
When cleverness and knowledge arise, great lies will flourish.
When relatives fall out with one another,
there will be filial duty and love.
When states are in confusion there will be faithful servants.
- Lao Tzu
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I love being married.
It's so great to find that one special person
you want to annoy for the rest of your life.
- Rita Rudner
One great thing about getting old is that
you can get out of all sorts of social obligations
just by saying you're too tired.
- George Carlin
Hey, Marge. Isn't it great being married
to someone who's recklessly impulsive?
- The Simpsons Movie (2007)
I am prepared to meet my Maker.
Whether my Maker is prepared for the great ordeal
of meeting me is another matter.
- Winston Churchill
It's not as great a day for the bride as she thinks.
She's not marrying the best man.
- Anonymous
The time-traveling is just too dangerous.
Better that I devote myself to study
the other great mystery of the universe - women!
- the movie Back to the Future II
We have a great life here in Alaska,
and we're never going back to America again!
- The Simpsons Movie (2007)
You ask me if I keep a notebook
to record my great ideas.
I've only ever had one.
- Albert Einstein
As usual, there is a great woman behind every idiot.
- John Lennon
Confused Memories of Childhood:
Hate to my father, cruel hate,
confused with love - a mix not great.
The man I love - the man I hate;
the man I want to emulate.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie
I love to shop after a bad relationship.
I don't know. I buy a new outfit
and it makes me feel better. It just does.
Sometimes I see a really great outfit,
I'll break up with someone on purpose.
- Rita Rudner
People who think they know everything
are a great annoyance to those of us who do.
- Isaac Asimov
No one can have a higher opinion of you than I have,
and I think you're a slimy, contemptible sewer rat!
- the movie The Great Mouse Detective
I have great hopes that we shall love each other all our lives
as much as if we had never married at all.
- Lord Byron
I always seem to get inspiration and renewed vitality
by contact with this great novel land of yours
which sticks up out of the Atlantic.
- Winston Churchill
I begin with the principle that all men are bores.
Surely no one will prove himself
so great a bore as to contradict me in this.
- Soren Kierkegaard
To the young child, all life is a great adventure -
when did we grow so dull and brittle.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie
New York City is a great monument
to the power of money and greed...
a race for rent.
- Frank Lloyd Wright
Who in the world am I? Ah, that's the great puzzle.
- Lewis Carroll
If (s)he's an apple and you're an orange,
celebrate your differences -
make a great fruit salad.
Love isn't about being the same -
it's about being sweet with each other.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie
The magic words for a great relationship are,
"I love you just the way you are."
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie
Silence is a source of great strength.
- Lao Tzu
The essence of life is not in
the great victories and grand failures,
but in the simple joys.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie
Where there is great love,
there are always miracles.
- Willa Cather
Dare to dream of your great success.
- Mary Anne Radmacher
Great minds discuss ideas;
average minds discuss events;
small minds discuss people.
- Eleanor Roosevelt
The great end of life is not knowledge but action.
- Thomas Henry Huxley
To be one, to be united is a great thing.
But to respect the right to be different is maybe even greater.
- Bono
If a man is called to be a street sweeper,
he should sweep streets even as Michelangelo painted,
or Beethoven composed music, or Shakespeare wrote poetry.
He should sweep streets so well that all the hosts
of heaven and earth will pause to say,
here lived a great street sweeper who did his job well.
- Martin Luther King, Jr.
In great contests, each party claims to act
in accordance with the will of God.
Both may be, and one must be wrong.
- Abraham Lincoln
You're off to Great Places!
Today is your day!
Your mountain is waiting,
So... get on your way!
- Dr. Seuss
Mostly, it is human to dislike surprises -
often with great intensity.
Be open to new ways;
sometimes newness just knocks on our door;
welcome it.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie
Neither a man nor a crowd nor a nation
can be trusted to act humanely
or to think sanely under the influence of a great fear.
- Bertrand Russell
Life is a great big canvas,
and you should throw all the paint you can on it.
- Danny Kaye
I long to accomplish a great and noble task,
but it is my chief duty to accomplish small tasks
as if they were great and noble.
- Helen Keller
It gives me great pleasure indeed to see the stubbornness
of an incorrigible nonconformist warmly acclaimed.
- Albert Einstein
No crime is so great as daring to excel.
- Winston Churchill
I have a great deal of company in the house,
especially in the morning when nobody calls.
- Henry David Thoreau
Dare to dream of your great success.
Become intimate with those things
which deeply motivate you
and regularly work toward
the realization of that mission.
- Mary Anne Radmacher
Regrets and resentments cause great suffering but fix nothing.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie
Don't be afraid to give up the good to go for the great.
- John D. Rockefeller
Having a personal opinion is great.
Believing that one's personal opinion is absolute truth
leads to most of the world's troubles.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie
Life in abundance comes only through great love.
- Elbert Hubbard
Confidence is that feeling by which the mind embarks
in great and honorable courses
with a sure hope and trust in itself.
- Marcus Tullius Cicero
The hottest place in Hell is reserved for those
who remain neutral in times of great moral conflict.
- Martin Luther King, Jr.
A Great Relationship is the Dance of Two Great Lives.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie
All great truths begin as blasphemies.
- George Bernard Shaw
Everything that is really great and inspiring
is created by the individual who can labor in freedom.
- Albert Einstein
The magic words for a great family are,
"I love you just the way you are."
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie
To the well-organized mind,
death is but the next great adventure.
- J. K. Rowling
Wealth consists not in having great possessions,
but in having few wants.
- Epictetus
The Two Great Lessons of Life: Choose Love & Trust God.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie
These are not dark days: these are great days -
the greatest days our country has ever lived.
- Winston Churchill
To the philosopher,
death is but the next great adventure.
- J. K. Rowling
To accomplish great things,
we must not only act, but also dream;
not only plan, but also believe.
- Anatole France
Great leadership is not the visit of an unexpected fate
but rather a flame which is kept burning
in spite of the winds of risk and opposition.
- Mary Anne Radmacher
Great hearts steadily send forth the secret forces
that incessantly draw great events.
- Ralph Waldo Emerson
Most people say that is it is the intellect
which makes a great scientist.
They are wrong: it is character.
- Albert Einstein
Thinking is necessary, but not sufficient, for living a great life.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie
Govern a great nation as you would cook a small fish.
Do not overdo it.
- Lao Tzu
One of the greatest casualties
of the war in Vietnam is the Great Society...
shot down on the battlefield of Vietnam.
- Martin Luther King, Jr.
The choice is to work alone to be a little
more successful than the next person,
or to work together for the great betterment of humanity.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie
Being is the great explainer.
- Henry David Thoreau
I am a firm believer in the people.
If given the truth, they can be depended upon
to meet any national crisis.
The great point is to bring them the real facts.
- Abraham Lincoln
The great defense against the air menace
is to attack the enemy's aircraft
as near as possible to their point of departure.
- Winston Churchill
To lead a great life:
Dream, Take Action, Repeat.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie
Great spirits have always encountered
violent opposition from mediocre minds.
- Albert Einstein
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May the world be kind to you,
and may your own thoughts be gentle upon yourself.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie
All materials & writings are copyright © Jonathan Lockwood Huie, except for quotes and other specifically identified material which belong to their respective copyright holders if applicable.