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Funny Organization Quotes
Funny Quotes about Organization

Let these funny Organization Quotes from my large collection of funny quotes about life add a little humor to your day.

Atheism is a non-prophet organization.
- George Carlin

If the United Nations once admits that international disputes
can be settled by using force,
then we will have destroyed the foundation of the organization
and our best hope of establishing a world order.
- Dwight D. Eisenhower

Teamwork is the ability to work together toward a common vision.
The ability to direct individual accomplishments
toward organizational objectives.
It is the fuel that allows common people to attain uncommon results.
- Andrew Carnegie

Men admire the man who can organize
their wishes and thoughts
in stone and wood and steel and brass.
- Ralph Waldo Emerson


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Interesting.
You Earth people glorify organized violence for 40 centuries,
but you imprison those who employ it privately.
- the character Spock in the television series Star Trek

So divinely is the world organized that every one of us,
in our place and time, is in balance with everything else.
- Adam Acone

Politeness is organized indifference.
- Paul Valery


 

Resistance to the organized mass can be effected only
by the man who is as well organized
in his individuality as the mass itself.
- Carl Jung

To the well-organized mind,
death is but the next great adventure.
- J. K. Rowling

For a people who are free, and who mean to remain so,
a well-organized and armed militia is their best security.
- Thomas Jefferson

I wanted to see exotic Vietnam, the jewel of Southeast Asia.
I, uh, I wanted to meet interesting
and stimulating people of an ancient culture,
and kill them.
- the movie Full Metal Jacket

It is an interesting question how far men
would retain their relative rank
if they were divested of their clothes.
- Henry David Thoreau

A lot of presidential memoirs, they say, are dull and self-serving.
I hope mine is interesting and self-serving.
- William J. Clinton

The only interesting answers are those that destroy the questions.
- Susan Sontag

The most interesting information comes from children,
for they tell all they know and then stop.
- Mark Twain

Success is never so interesting as struggle
- Willa Cather

After fifteen minutes I wanted to marry her,
and after half an hour
I completely gave up the idea of stealing her purse.
- the movie Take the Money and Run (1969)

My boyfriend and I broke up.
He wanted to get married and I didn't want him to.
- Rita Rudner

I have often wanted to drown my troubles,
but I can't get my wife to go swimming.
- Anonymous

Sometimes you get the results you wanted,
sometimes you don't.
What matters is that you did your best.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie

In all our contacts, it is probably the sense
of being really needed and wanted
which gives us the greatest satisfaction
and creates the most lasting bond.
- Eleanor Roosevelt

A somebody was once a nobody who wanted to and did.
- John Burroughs

Today is the right day to do
what you have long wanted to do.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie

Some people wanted champagne and caviar
when they should have had beer and hot dogs.
- Dwight D. Eisenhower

In my prayers I never said I needed a home.
I said I wanted a sanctuary.
- Mary Anne Radmacher

Piglet sidled up to Pooh from behind. "Pooh?" he whispered.
"Yes, Piglet?"
"Nothing," said Piglet, taking Pooh's hand.
"I just wanted to be sure of you."
- A. A. Milne (Winnie-The-Pooh)

Even the rich are hungry for love,
for being cared for, for being wanted,
for having someone to call their own.
- Mother Teresa

I wanted to know the name of every stone
and flower and insect and bird and beast.
I wanted to know where it got its color, where it got its life -
but there was no one to tell me.
- George Washington Carver

I wanted to be a doctor that I might be able to work
without having to talk
because for years I had been giving myself out in words.
- Albert Schweitzer

A man is incomplete until he is married.
After that, he is finished.
- Zsa Zsa Gabor

Procrastination is the bad habit of putting off
until the day after tomorrow what should
have been done the day before yesterday.
- Napoleon Hill

There are two times when a man doesn't understand a woman -
before marriage and after marriage.
- Anonymous

There are two things that are more difficult
than making an after-dinner speech:
climbing a wall which is leaning toward you
and kissing a girl who is leaning away from you.
- Winston Churchill

I don't believe in the after life,
although I am bringing a change of underwear.
- Woody Allen

Never put off till tomorrow
what you can do the day after tomorrow.
- Mark Twain

Creationists make it sound as though a "theory'
is something you dreamt up after being drunk all night.
- Isaac Asimov

I once had a rose named after me
and I was very flattered.
But I was not pleased to read
the description in the catalogue:
no good in a bed, but fine up against a wall.
- Eleanor Roosevelt

Getting married is a lot like getting into a tub of hot water.
After you get used to it, it ain't so hot.
- Minnie Pearl

Just remember, after they foreclose on your mortgage,
you get a lot more sunshine in your life.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie

Guests, like fish, begin to smell after three days.
- Benjamin Franklin

The third certainty of life, after death and taxes,
is that nothing will work out the way you want.
Life is fully as bad as you think it is.
Choose to live joyfully anyway.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie

Life is just one damned thing after another.
- Elbert Hubbard (Philistine - A Periodical of Protest, 1896)

I love to shop after a bad relationship.
I don't know. I buy a new outfit
and it makes me feel better. It just does.
Sometimes I see a really great outfit,
I'll break up with someone on purpose.
- Rita Rudner

After the first blush of sin, comes its indifference.
- Henry David Thoreau

History teaches us that men and nations behave wisely
only after they have exhausted all other alternatives.
- Abba Eban

Thinking is what most people resort to after all else fails.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie

I always avoid prophesying beforehand,
because it is a much better policy to prophesy
after the event has already taken place.
- Winston Churchill

Love comforteth like sunshine after rain.
- William Shakespeare

My rule of life prescribed as an absolutely sacred rite
smoking cigars and also the drinking of alcohol
before, after and if need be during all meals
and in the intervals between them.
- Winston Churchill

To know God, watch a butterfly return to the same tree -
after a year and a thousand miles.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie

I make it a policy to try never to
make a complete idiot of myself twice in the same way.
After all, there's always all kinds of new ways
to make a complete idiot of myself.
Why repeat the old ones?
- Margot Dalton

Youth, large, lusty, loving -
Youth, full of grace, force, fascination.
Do you know that Old Age may come after you
with equal grace, force, fascination?
- Walt Whitman

Naturally, the common people don't want war ...
but after all it is the leaders of a country who determine the policy,
and it is always a simple matter to drag the people along,
whether it is a democracy, or a fascist dictatorship,
or a parliament, or a communist dictatorship.
Voice or no voice, the people can always be brought
to the bidding of the leaders.
That is easy. All you have to do is tell them
they are being attacked,
and denounce the pacifists for lack of patriotism
and exposing the country to danger.
It works the same in every country.
- Hermann Goering

It takes a long while for a naturally trustful person
to reconcile himself to the idea that
after all God will not help him
- H. L. Mencken

Many men go fishing all of their lives
without knowing that it is not fish they are after.
- Henry David Thoreau

Wealth, like happiness, is never attained when sought after directly.
It comes as a by-product of providing a useful service.
- Henry Ford

After climbing a great hill,
one only finds that there are many more hills to climb.
- Nelson Mandela

There are two things to aim at in life:
first, to get what you want,
and after that to to enjoy it.
- Logan Pearsall Smith

When people speak to you about a preventive war,
you tell them to go fight it.
After my experience, I have come to hate war.
War settles nothing.
- Dwight D. Eisenhower

Mistakes are, after all, the foundations of truth,
and if a man does not know what a thing is,
it is at least an increase in knowledge
if he knows what it is not.
- Carl Jung

Success seems to be largely a matter
of hanging on after others have let go.
- William Feather

My reaction to porno films is as follows; After the first ten minutes,
I want to go home and screw; After the first twenty minutes,
I never want to screw again as long as I live
- Erica Jong

Reading, after a certain age,
diverts the mind too much from its creative pursuits.
Any man who reads too much and uses his own brain too little
falls into lazy habits of thinking.
- Albert Einstein

The sound of 'gentle stillness' after all the thunder
and wind have passed will be the ultimate Word from God.
- Jim Elliot

Be an opener of doors for such as come after thee.
- Ralph Waldo Emerson

It's what you learn after you know it all that counts.
- John Wooden

One's own religion is after all
a matter between oneself
and one's Maker and no one else's.
- Mohandas (Mahatma) Gandhi

About morals: I know only that
what is moral is what you feel good after
and what is immoral is what you feel bad after.
- Ernest Hemingway

Ones best success comes after their greatest disappointments.
- Henry Ward Beecher

I look for what needs to be done.
After all, that's how the universe designs itself.
- R. Buckminster Fuller

Part of our essential humanity is paying respect to what God gave us
and what will be here a long time after we're gone.
- William J. Clinton


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May the world be kind to you,
and may your own thoughts be gentle upon yourself.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie


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