Facebook share Tweet This Email this
Let these funny Onto Quotes from my large collection of funny quotes about life add a little humor to your day.
Life - for most people - is their past projected large
onto the movie screen of their future.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie
Don't project your past onto my future.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie
You hold onto religion, you know,
rules, regulations, traditions.
I think what God is interested in
is people's hearts, and that's hard enough.
- Bono
I choose not to project my past onto my future.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie
Get a Funny Quote of the Day each day by email or in your feed reader.
The being of our mothers is forever branded onto our own being.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie
The best political, social, and spiritual work we can do
is to withdraw the projection of our shadow onto others.
- Carl Jung
Life is like a ten speed bicycle.
Most of us have gears we never use.
- Charles M. Schulz
Life ... full of loneliness, and misery,
and suffering, and unhappiness,
and it's all over much too quickly.
- the Woody Allen movie Annie Hall
Life is like jumping out of an airplane without a parachute -
only the last couple seconds are fatal,
but most people are scared to death the whole way down.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie
The only fool bigger than the person who knows it all
is the person who argues with him.
- Stanislaw Jerszy Lec
I love being married.
It's so great to find that one special person
you want to annoy for the rest of your life.
- Rita Rudner
Morality is simply the attitude we adopt
towards people whom we personally dislike.
- Oscar Wilde
Life's like Vegas. You're up, you're down,
but in the end the house always wins.
Doesn't mean you didn't have fun.
- the Woody Allen movie Deconstructing Harry
The trick is growing up without growing old.
- Casey Stengel
It ain't what you don't know that gets you into trouble.
It's what you know for sure that just ain't so.
- Mark Twain (attributed)
In the book of life, the answers aren't in the back.
- Charles M. Schulz in his Peanuts cartoon
No matter how much cats fight,
there always seem to be plenty of kittens.
- Abraham Lincoln
Life is always lived in the eye-of-the-storm
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie
Life would be infinitely happier if we could only be born
at the age of eighty and gradually approach eighteen.
- Mark Twain
One does not leave a convivial party before closing time.
- Winston Churchill
Life is serious, get out your magic wand.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie
Live life on the edge, not with an edge.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie
Nothing so needs reforming as other people's habits.
- Mark Twain
If life is a trial, who is the judge and jury?
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie
Life is defined more by its contrasts than its samenesses;
Life is defined more by its risks than the many securities.
- Mary Anne Radmacher
One man's remorse is another man's reminiscence.
- Ogden Nash
Old age is fifteen years older than I am.
- Oliver Wendell Holmes, Jr.
The most difficult phase of life
is not when no one understands you,
it is when you don't understand yourself.
- Anonymous
Life is what happens to you while you're busy making other plans.
- John Lennon
You can't make an omelet without breaking eggs.
- Anonymous
We are all in the gutter, but some of us are looking at the stars.
- Oscar Wilde
Life is a journey - enjoy the journey.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie
To the young child, all life is a great adventure -
when did we grow so dull and brittle.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie
Life only
appears to be
rushing toward us
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie
The difference between school and life?
In school, you're taught a lesson and then given a test.
In life, you're given a test that teaches you a lesson.
- Tom Bodett
Sucking the marrow out of life
doesn't mean choking on the bone.
- Robin Williams as John Keating
in the 1989 movie Dead Poets Society
A big part of letting go is recognizing
when it is time to stay in a situation
and when it is time to move on.
- Darren L. Johnson
When dealing with people, remember you are
not dealing with creatures of logic,
but creatures of emotion.
- Dale Carnegie
Thousands of candles can be lit from a single candle,
and the life of the candle will not be shortened.
Happiness never decreases by being shared.
- The Buddha
Is today a day to gather strength from the storm -
a day to to learn life lessons for the next battle?
Or is today a day to sit by the fire
and watch the storm rage outside?
Either way, the storm is just life.
Give thanks for all of Life.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie
Play with life, laugh with life,
dance lightly with life,
and smile at the riddles of life,
knowing that life's only true lessons
are writ small in the margin.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie
I Dream This Day of Wondrous Things,
of Peace and Hope and Pride.
I Dance My Dance with Life Today,
I'm Filled with Love Inside.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie
Feeling sorry for yourself, and your present condition,
is not only a waste of energy
but the worst habit you could possibly have.
- Dale Carnegie
The life of inner peace,
being harmonious and without stress,
is the easiest type of existence.
- Norman Vincent Peale
Nobody can be uncheered with a balloon.
- A. A. Milne (Winnie-The-Pooh)
Life is really simple,
but we insist on making it complicated.
- Confucius
Life is a reflection of intent.
Love reflects love.
Hate reflects hate.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie
Every man prefers belief to the exercise of judgment.
- Lucius Annaeus Seneca
Success is failure recycled.
Life is death reborn.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie
I don't believe in the after life,
although I am bringing a change of underwear.
- Woody Allen
The true meaning of life is to plant trees,
under whose shade you do not expect to sit.
- Nelson Henderson
Bringing a childlike wonder
and a beginner's mind to life
maximizes both success and joy.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie
You are Never Too Old to Give or Get Gold Stars.
Show Your Honest Appreciation - Today.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie
It takes a big cat to be number 2.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie
Life is too important to be taken seriously.
- Oscar Wilde
Here's a toast to your new bride who has everything a girl
could want in her life, except for good taste in men.
- Anonymous
Most people with low self-esteem have earned it.
- George Carlin
Mama always said life was like a box of chocolates.
You never know what you're gonna get.
- the movie Forrest Gump
Sometimes I lie awake at night and ask "Why me?"
Then a voice answers "Nothing personal,
your name just happened to come up. -
- Charlie Brown, in Charles M. Schulz' cartoon Peanuts
Knowing your own darkness is the best method
for dealing with the darknesses of other people.
- Carl Jung
Life's burdens are lighter when I laugh at myself.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie
Some things will never seem adequate
no matter how hard we try.
- from the movie White Man's Burden
Iron rusts from disuse;
water loses its purity from stagnation...
even so does inaction sap the vigor of the mind.
- Leonardo da Vinci
Science may have found a cure for most evils;
but it has found no remedy for the worst of them all -
the apathy of human beings.
- Helen Keller
She generally gave herself very good advice,
(though she very seldom followed it).
- Lewis Carroll
Normal is not something to aspire to,
it's something to get away from.
- Jodie Foster
Life is lived in the living.
Set aside convention, caution,
and arbitrary "rules" about how
life is supposed to be lived.
Choose! Explore! Adventure!
Live life to the fullest.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie
The book of life is filled with incoherent riddles.
Life's true lessons are inscribed in a corner of the margin.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie
You don't have the power to make life "fair,"
but you do have the power to make life joyful.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie
The essence of all religions is one.
Only their approaches are different.
- Mohandas (Mahatma) Gandhi
They have come up with a perfect understanding.
He won't try to run her life,
and he won't try to run his, either.
- Anonymous
Thank you for visiting: Funny Onto Quotes - Funny Quotes about Onto.
Please sign up on the form below to receive
my Free Daily Inspiration - Daily Quotes email.
You can also search my large collection of Funny Quotes.
May the world be kind to you,
and may your own thoughts be gentle upon yourself.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie
All materials & writings are copyright © Jonathan Lockwood Huie, except for quotes and other specifically identified material which belong to their respective copyright holders if applicable.