Facebook share Tweet This Email this
Let these funny Naught Quotes from my large collection of funny quotes about life add a little humor to your day.
O Day of days when we can read!
The reader and the book, either without the other is naught.
- Ralph Waldo Emerson
Love gives naught but itself
and takes naught but from itself.
Love possesses not
nor would it be possessed;
For love is sufficient unto love.
- Khalil Gibran
Love gives naught but itself
and takes naught but from itself.
- Khalil Gibran
Be Deliciously Naughty.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie
Get a Funny Quote of the Day each day by email or in your feed reader.
I am Counterpoint to the Clamor of the World.
I am Deliciously Naughty.
I am Enchantingly Whimsical.
I am Filled With Mischief and Giggles.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie
What exactly is the function of a rubber duck?
- the movie Harry Potter and the Chamber of Secrets (2002)
It's not the size of the dog in the fight,
it's the size of the fight in the dog.
- Mark Twain
It ain't what you don't know that gets you into trouble.
It's what you know for sure that just ain't so.
- Mark Twain (attributed)
The trick is growing up without growing old.
- Casey Stengel
A man wrapped up in himself makes a very small bundle.
- Benjamin Franklin
Love is an irresistible desire
to be irresistibly desired.
- Robert Frost
Yesterday is like a dung heap;
you can complain about the smell,
or you can use it to fertilize tomorrow's garden.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie
Anger spells dANGER.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie
Live life on the edge, not with an edge.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie
The only fool bigger than the person who knows it all
is the person who argues with him.
- Stanislaw Jerszy Lec
Life is like a ten speed bicycle.
Most of us have gears we never use.
- Charles M. Schulz
I'm at an age when my back goes out more than I do.
- Phyllis Diller
If you do what you've always done,
you'll get what you always got.
- Mark Twain
Be careful not to do your good deeds
when there's no one watching you.
- Tom Lehrer
"It's not that important,
don't worry about it" is the answer,
now what was the question?
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie
The first sigh of love is the last breath of wisdom.
- Anonymous
Courage is what it takes to stand up and speak;
courage is also what it takes to sit down and listen.
- Winston Churchill
The proper office of a friend is to side with you
when you are in the wrong.
Nearly anybody will side with you when you are in the right.
- Mark Twain
When you are courting a nice girl
an hour seems like a second.
When you sit on a red-hot cinder
a second seems like an hour.
That's relativity.
- Albert Einstein
It looks like we're up chocolate creek without a Popsicle stick!
- the movie Shrek 2 (2004)
Marriage is a sort of friendship recognized by the police.
- Anonymous
Crazy is walking down the street
with half a cantaloupe on your head,
muttering; "I'm a hamster, I'm a hamster."
- the movie Spy Hard (1996)
Well, you ask a silly question, and you get a silly answer.
- Tom Lehrer
Never try to teach a pig to sing.
It wastes your time, and it annoys the pig.
- Mark Twain
The physician can bury his mistakes,
but the architect can only advise his client to plant vines -
so they should go as far as possible from home
to build their first buildings.
- Frank Lloyd Wright
A clever man commits no minor blunders.
- Johann Wolfgang von Goethe
Life is serious, get out your magic wand.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie
You are only young once,
but you can stay immature indefinitely.
- Anonymous
There is no pleasure in having nothing to do;
the fun is in having lots to do and not doing it.
- Mary Wilson Little
Consistency is the last refuge of the unimaginative.
- Oscar Wilde
Tell me about a person's family, friends, and community,
and I'll tell you what his opinions are.
- Mark Twain
(paraphrase)
She generally gave herself very good advice,
(though she very seldom followed it).
- Lewis Carroll
It's like deja-vu, all over again.
- Yogi Berra
Tradition is the illusion of permanence.
- the Woody Allen movie Deconstructing Harry
Never put off till tomorrow
what you can do the day after tomorrow.
- Mark Twain
Hang tough... big girl panties today.
- Anonymous humor
Sometimes I've believed as many as
six impossible things before breakfast.
- Lewis Carroll
Too many people spend money they haven't earned,
to buy things they don't want,
to impress people they don't like.
- Will Rogers
Mind Chatter...
"I'm too fat; I'm too thin; and my hair is a fright;
And I'm never enough; and my world is not right;
I'm not smart; I'm not cute; I'm not strong; I'm a bust
I earn scorn; I earn hate; I'm no good; I disgust."
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie
The third certainty of life, after death and taxes,
is that nothing will work out the way you want.
Life is fully as bad as you think it is.
Choose to live joyfully anyway.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie
Always remember that you are absolutely unique.
Just like everyone else.
- Margaret Mead
I never make stupid mistakes.
Only very, very clever ones.
- John Peel
Persevere. Plan. Strategize. Focus. Breathe. Write.
Let go: relax. Forgive. All this failing: take a nap.
- Mary Anne Radmacher
Experience is simply the name we give our mistakes.
- Oscar Wilde
He who can take advice is sometimes superior
to him who can give it.
- Erica Jong
May You Dance Lightly With Life, and Have a Whimsical Day.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie
Sometimes I lie awake at night and ask "Why me?"
Then a voice answers "Nothing personal,
your name just happened to come up. -
- Charlie Brown, in Charles M. Schulz' cartoon Peanuts
Money won't make you happy...
but everybody wants to find out for themselves.
- Zig Ziglar
Education is a method whereby
one acquires a higher grade of prejudices.
- Laurence J. Peter
True love is like ghosts,
which everyone talks about and few have seen.
- Francois de La Rochefoucauld
How many legs does a dog have
if you call the tail a leg? Four.
Calling a tail a leg doesn't make it a leg.
- Abraham Lincoln
Truth is a tendency.
- R. Buckminster Fuller
Magic is natural to Wizards,
and only a little harder for the rest of us.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie
People who say it cannot be done should not
interrupt those who are doing it.
- George Bernard Shaw
A lifelong friend is someone
you haven't borrowed money from yet.
- Anonymous
There are two kinds of people,
those who do the work,
and those who take the credit.
Try to be in the first group;
there is less competition there.
- Indira Gandhi
I wish you a magical white rabbit kind of day.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie
Love is loving what your lover loves.
- Anonymous
I am fond of pigs.
Dogs look up to us.
Cats look down on us.
Pigs treat us as equals.
- Winston Churchill
The difference between stupidity and genius
is that genius has its limits.
- Albert Einstein
When all think alike, no one is thinking very much.
- Walter Lippmann
God is at play,
I am his modeling clay.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie
Nothing is as good for the soul as a marshmallow roast.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie
Praying is important when you wake up
at two o'clock in the morning
feeling sick from eating something dumb the day before.
- Charlie Brown in Charles M. Schulz' cartoon Peanuts
History is the version of past events
that people have decided to agree upon.
- Napoleon Bonaparte
Self confident independent thinker -
sounds like the makings of a hero.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie
Thank you for visiting: Funny Naught Quotes - Funny Quotes about Naught.
Please sign up on the form below to receive
my Free Daily Inspiration - Daily Quotes email.
You can also search my large collection of Funny Quotes.
May the world be kind to you,
and may your own thoughts be gentle upon yourself.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie
All materials & writings are copyright © Jonathan Lockwood Huie, except for quotes and other specifically identified material which belong to their respective copyright holders if applicable.