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Let these funny Moderate Quotes from my large collection of funny quotes about life add a little humor to your day.
Be merciful, moderate, and modest.
- Lao Tzu
During his training, a baseball player strives
to make each swing better than the last.
The repetition of a faulty swing would be worse than useless.
It would ingrain bad habits.
The same is true of emotional responses.
If we allow ourselves to continue to have the same angry responses,
we just entrench our anger habit.
But if we strive - through consciousness, visualization, and coaching -
to moderate our anger response,
over time, we can train ourselves to respond
to events as we choose - without anger.
You can't magically be free from anger tomorrow,
but you can put yourself on your own training program
that will reduce the frequency and intensity
of your anger response day by day, year by year.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie
Life is a moderately good play
with a badly written third act.
- Truman Capote
An overfull calendar, like an overfull stomach,
is a consequence of taking on too much.
Commit, and eat, in moderation.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie
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If one oversteps the bounds of moderation,
the greatest pleasures cease to please.
- Epictetus
People who work together will win,
whether it be against complex football defenses,
or the problems of modern society.
- Vince Lombardi
Social progress can be measured
by the social position of the female sex.
- Karl Marx
(German philosopher and political economist
whose ideas are credited as the foundation of modern communism)
Have we not come to such an impasse in the modern world
that we must love our enemies - or else?
The chain reaction of evil -
hate begetting hate, wars producing more wars -
must be broken, or else we shall be plunged
into the dark abyss of annihilation.
- Martin Luther King, Jr.
Modern cynics and skeptics... see no harm in paying those
to whom they entrust the minds of their children
a smaller wage than is paid to those to whom
they entrust the care of their plumbing.
- John F. Kennedy
The task of the modern educator
is not to cut down jungles,
but to irrigate deserts.
- C.S. Lewis
Religion is the masterpiece of the art of animal training,
for it trains people as to how they should think.
- Arthur Schopenhauer
Morality is simply the attitude we adopt
towards people whom we personally dislike.
- Oscar Wilde
Life is like jumping out of an airplane without a parachute -
only the last couple seconds are fatal,
but most people are scared to death the whole way down.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie
Half the people you know are below average.
- Anonymous
Gravitation is not responsible for people falling in love.
- Albert Einstein
The Lord prefers common-looking people.
That is why he makes so many of them.
- Abraham Lincoln
I think you're the opposite of a paranoid.
I think you go around with the insane delusion that people like you.
- the Woody Allen movie Deconstructing Harry
Some cause happiness wherever they go;
others whenever they go.
- Oscar Wilde
I wanted to see exotic Vietnam, the jewel of Southeast Asia.
I, uh, I wanted to meet interesting
and stimulating people of an ancient culture,
and kill them.
- the movie Full Metal Jacket
One good reason to only maintain a small circle of friends
is that three out of four murders
are committed by people who know the victim.
- George Carlin
When two people decide to get a divorce,
it isn't a sign that they "don't understand" one another,
but a sign that they have, at last, begun to.
- Helen Rowland
Too bad all the people who know how to run this country
are busy running taxicabs or cutting hair.
- George Burns
Will the people in the cheaper seats clap your hands?
And the rest of you, if you'll just rattle your jewelry.
- John Lennon
Half the world is composed of idiots,
the other half, of people clever enough
to take indecent advantage of them.
- Walter Kerr
Nothing so needs reforming as other people's habits.
- Mark Twain
The more you explain it, the more I don't understand it.
- Mark Twain
We make our friends; we make our enemies;
but God makes our next-door neighbor.
- Gilbert (G. K.) Chesterton
In critical moments men sometimes see
exactly what they wish to see.
- the character Spock of the television series Star Trek
I do not believe that civilization will be wiped out
in a war fought with the atomic bomb.
Perhaps two-thirds of the people of the earth will be killed.
- Albert Einstein
I love mankind, it's people I can't stand.
- Charles M. Schulz
Contrary to general belief,
I do not believe that friends are necessarily
the people you like best,
they are merely the people who got there first.
- Peter Ustinov
Too many people spend money they haven't earned,
to buy things they don't want,
to impress people they don't like.
- Will Rogers
Oh, you weak, beautiful people
who give up with such grace.
What you need is someone to take hold of you -
gently, with love, and hand your life back to you.
- Tennessee Williams
People who are wrapped up in themselves make small packages.
- Benjamin Franklin
Gods always behave like the people who make them.
- Zora Neale Hurston
In religion and politics, people's belief's and convictions
are in almost every case gotten at second hand,
and without examination
- Mark Twain
You can safely assume that you've
created God in your own image
when it turns out that God hates
all the same people you do.
- Anne Lamott
Clothes make the man.
Naked people have little or no influence on society.
- Mark Twain
Join the army. Visit strange and exotic places.
Meet fascinating people. And kill them.
- Anonymous
Smile, it makes people wonder what you are thinking.
- Anonymous
I know that there are people who do not love their fellow man,
and I hate people like that!
- Tom Lehrer
The trouble with having an open mind, of course,
is that people will insist on coming along
and trying to put things in it.
- Terry Pratchett
People who say it cannot be done should not
interrupt those who are doing it.
- George Bernard Shaw
To go against the dominant thinking of your friends,
of most of the people you see every day,
is perhaps the most difficult act of heroism you can perform.
- Theodore H. White
There is no use whatsoever trying to help
people who do not help themselves.
You cannot push anyone up a ladder
unless he is willing to climb himself.
- Andrew Carnegie
Democracy means simply the bludgeoning of the people
by the people for the people.
- Oscar Wilde
The church is always trying to get other people to reform;
it might not be a bad idea to reform itself a little,
by way of example.
- Mark Twain
The most important service rendered
by the press and the magazines
is that of educating people
to approach printed matter with distrust.
- Samuel Butler
There are two kinds of people,
those who do the work,
and those who take the credit.
Try to be in the first group;
there is less competition there.
- Indira Gandhi
Common looking people are the best in the world:
that is the reason the Lord makes so many of them.
- Abraham Lincoln
If you're going to tell people the truth,
be funny or they'll kill you.
- Billy Wilder
These capitalists generally act harmoniously and in concert,
to fleece the people.
- Abraham Lincoln
Love is what makes two people
sit in the middle of a park bench
when there is plenty of room at both ends.
- Anonymous
I was wise enough to never grow up
while fooling most people into believing I had.
- Margaret Mead
Do something wonderful, people may imitate it.
- Albert Schweitzer
You know your god is man-made when he
hates all the same people you do.
- Anonymous
The trouble with the world is not
that people know too little,
but that they know so many things that ain't so.
- Mark Twain
Thinking is what most people resort to after all else fails.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie
Be smarter than other people, just don't tell them so.
- H. Jackson Brown, Jr.
"But I don't want to go among mad people," said Alice.
"Oh, you can't help that," said the cat. "We're all mad here."
- Lewis Carroll
When dealing with people, remember you are
not dealing with creatures of logic,
but creatures of emotion.
- Dale Carnegie
All people know the same truth.
Our lives consist of how we chose to distort it.
- the Woody Allen movie Deconstructing Harry
Advertising is the art of convincing people to spend money
they don't have for something they don't need.
- Will Rogers
Most people with low self-esteem have earned it.
- George Carlin
The whole problem with the world is that
fools and fanatics are always so certain of themselves,
but wiser people so full of doubts.
- Bertrand Russell
Most of what we call management consists of
making it difficult for people to get their work done.
- Peter F. Drucker
People living their lives for you on TV;
They say they're better than you, and you agree.
- Jewel
Religion is regarded by the common people as true,
by the wise as false, and by the rulers as useful.
- Lucius Annaeus Seneca
He who loves 50 people has 50 woes;
he who loves no one has no woes.
- The Buddha
People who want to share their religious views with you
almost never want you to share yours with them.
- Dave Barry
Most people's historical perspective
begins with the day of their birth.
- Rush Limbaugh
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May the world be kind to you,
and may your own thoughts be gentle upon yourself.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie
All materials & writings are copyright © Jonathan Lockwood Huie, except for quotes and other specifically identified material which belong to their respective copyright holders if applicable.