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Funny Manage Quotes
Funny Quotes about Manage

Let these funny Manage Quotes from my large collection of funny quotes about life add a little humor to your day.

You manage things, you lead people.
- Grace Hopper

To manage your mind,
know that there is nothing,
and then relinquish all attachment to nothingness.
- Lao Tzu

How different our lives are when we
really know what is deeply important to us,
and keeping that picture in mind,
we manage ourselves each day
to be and to do what really matters most
- Stephen Covey

Don't try to manage people;
You manage things; You lead people.
- Grace Hopper


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Manage through the uncertainties.
Practice appropriate actions and participate in healthy choices.
Value and celebrate the loyalty of the individuals around you:
celebrate their competencies and successes, as well as your own.
Build up your circle and reinforce it at every opportunity.
- Mary Anne Radmacher

The signs of outstanding leadership
appear primarily among the followers.
Are the followers reaching their potential?
Are they learning? Serving?
Do they achieve the required results?
Do they change with grace? Manage conflict?
- Max De Pree

Manage the remarkable balance between acting
from your heart and close to your gifts
with completing the obligations
that your labor and tasks require of you.
Leverage opportunity AND seize joy.
- Mary Anne Radmacher


 

A rich man is nothing but a poor man with money.
- W. C. Fields

Why does a woman work ten years to change a man's habits
and then complain that he's not the man she married?
- Barbra Streisand

A man wrapped up in himself makes a very small bundle.
- Benjamin Franklin

Don't marry a man to reform him -
that's what reform schools are for.
- Mae West

I am a man of fixed and unbending principles,
the first of which is to be flexible at all times.
- Everett Dirksen

Afraid? Me? A man who's licked
his weight in wild caterpillars?
Afraid? You bet I'm afraid!
- Groucho Marx

It's not as great a day for the bride as she thinks.
She's not marrying the best man.
- Anonymous

He's the kind of man a woman would have to marry to get rid of.
- Mae West

A man's friendships are, like his will,
invalidated by marriage -
but they are also no less invalidated
by the marriage of his friends.
- Samuel Butler

Do not marry a man to reform him.
That is what reform schools are for.
- Mae West

You can lead a man to Congress,
but you can't make him think.
- Milton Berle

Marriages don't last. When I meet a guy,
the first question I ask myself is:
is this the man I want my children to spend their weekends with?
- Rita Rudner

A man is a fool if he drinks before he reaches the age of 50,
and a fool if he doesn't afterward.
- Frank Lloyd Wright

Barf: I'm a mog: half man, half dog. I'm my own best friend!
- the movie Spaceballs (1987)

You never really know a man until you have divorced him.
- Zsa Zsa Gabor

Give a man one rabbit, and he will eat for a day;
give a man two rabbits, and he will
feed his family and his neighbors
and return you 64,768 rabbits in change.
- Anonymous

One man's theology is another man's belly laugh.
- Robert A. Heinlein

No man is truly married until he understands
every word his wife is NOT saying.
- Anonymous

Whenever I date a guy, I think,
"Is this the man I want my children
to spend their weekends with?"
- Rita Rudner

I care not much for a man's religion
whose dog and cat are not the better for it.
- Abraham Lincoln

There are two times when a man doesn't understand a woman -
before marriage and after marriage.
- Anonymous

One man's remorse is another man's reminiscence.
- Ogden Nash

In order to be happy with a man,
you must understand him a lot and love him a little.
To be happy with a woman, you must love her a lot
and not try to understand her at all.
- Helen Rowland

A man is incomplete until he is married.
After that, he is finished.
- Zsa Zsa Gabor

Outside of a dog, a book is man's best friend.
Inside of a dog, it's too dark to read.
- Groucho Marx

Getting divorced just because you don't love a man
is almost as silly as getting married just because you do.
- Zsa Zsa Gabor

A man likes his wife to be
just clever enough to appreciate his cleverness,
and just stupid enough to admire it.
- Israel Zangwill

Men always want to be a woman's first love -
women like to be a man's last romance.
- Oscar Wilde

One cannot have everything the way he would like it.
A man has no business to be depressed by a disappointment,
anyway; he ought to make up his mind to get even.
- Mark Twain

The man who does not read good books
has no advantage over the man who cannot read them.
- Mark Twain

Two things a man should never be angry at:
what he can help,
and what he cannot help.
- Thomas Fuller

If a man smiles all the time,
he's probably selling something that doesn't work.
- George Carlin

When I hear a man preach,
I like to see him act as if he were fighting bees.
- Abraham Lincoln

The civilized man has built a coach,
but has lost the use of his feet.
- Ralph Waldo Emerson

I don't advise a haircut, man.
All hairdressers are in the employment of the government.
Hairs are your aerials.
They pick up signals from the cosmos,
and transmit them directly into the brain.
This is the reason bald-headed men are uptight.
- the movie Withnail & I

One man's "magic" is another man's engineering.
"Supernatural" is a null word.
- Robert A. Heinlein

The reason why the world lacks unity,
and lies broken and in heaps,
is, because man is disunited with himself.
- Ralph Waldo Emerson

I would never want to be a member of a group
whose symbol was a man nailed to two pieces of wood.
- George Carlin

Beauty is the bait which with delight
allures man to enlarge his kind.
- Socrates

It appears to be a law that you cannot have
a deep sympathy with both man and nature.
- Henry David Thoreau

Many a man owes his success to his first wife
and his second wife to his success.
- Jim Backus

If it keeps up, man will atrophy
all his limbs but the push-button finger.
- Frank Lloyd Wright

You can always tell when a man's well informed.
His views are pretty much like your own.
- H. Jackson Brown, Jr.

The power of man has grown in every sphere, except over himself.
- Winston Churchill

Morality which depends upon the helplessness
of a man or woman has not much to recommend it.
Morality is rooted in the purity of our hearts.
- Mohandas (Mahatma) Gandhi

We are born believing.
A man bears beliefs as a tree bears apples.
- Ralph Waldo Emerson

I know that God made the whole world in 4004 BC.
I know because my preacher told me. He's a good man.
He's even saving up all the money we give him
to go to bible college someday.
- Anonymous Humor

The way for a young man to rise is
to improve himself in every way he can,
never suspecting that anybody wishes to hinder him.
- Abraham Lincoln

Never stir up litigation.
A worse man can scarcely be found than one who does this.
- Abraham Lincoln

A man can't be too careful in the choice of enemies.
- Oscar Wilde

The savage in man is never quite eradicated.
- Henry David Thoreau

Every man thinks God is on his side.
- Jean Anouilh

If I knew for a certainty that a man was coming to my house
with the conscious design of doing me good,
I should run for my life.
- Henry David Thoreau

Man's nature is not essentially evil.
Brute nature has been known to
yield to the influence of love.
You must never despair of human nature.
- Mohandas (Mahatma) Gandhi

Man can hardly even recognize the devils of his own creation.
- Albert Schweitzer

Man will occasionally stumble over the truth,
but most of the time he will pick himself up and continue on.
- Winston Churchill

Man tends to treat all of his opinions as principles.
- Herbert Sebastian Agar

Man's role is uncertain, undefined, and perhaps unnecessary.
- Margaret Mead

A cynic is a man who, when he smells flowers,
looks around for a coffin.
- H. L. Mencken

Clothes make the man.
Naked people have little or no influence on society.
- Mark Twain

Books serve to show a man
that those original thoughts of his
aren't very new at all.
- Abraham Lincoln

The man who says he is willing to meet you halfway
is usually a poor judge of distance.
- Laurence J. Peter

Never give a sword to a man who can't dance.
- Confucius

If you can not answer a man's argument,
all is not lost; you can still call him vile names.
- Elbert Hubbard


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May the world be kind to you,
and may your own thoughts be gentle upon yourself.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie


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