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Funny Quotes about Life
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Funny Lipstick Quotes
Funny Quotes about Lipstick

Let these funny Lipstick Quotes from my large collection of funny quotes about life add a little humor to your day.

Life is magnificent - just as it comes.
Life has no need for fancy clothes, or lipstick.
Life is no pig.
Our life is the greatest gift of all creation.
When we are unhappy with life -
when we are shocked by the stock market,
or dismayed by our choice of political candidates,
let us not lash out in anger.
But also, let us not try to pretty up life
with some lipstick and some party clothes.
See life clearly - no rose colored glasses -
and then CHOOSE to love life.
CHOOSE to be happy, be joyful, be grateful,
be forgiving of everyone and of every act
we believe has hurt us.
Life just "IS."
We get to CHOOSE our relationship with life.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie

Life ... full of loneliness, and misery,
and suffering, and unhappiness,
and it's all over much too quickly.
- the Woody Allen movie Annie Hall

Life is like a ten speed bicycle.
Most of us have gears we never use.
- Charles M. Schulz

Life is like jumping out of an airplane without a parachute -
only the last couple seconds are fatal,
but most people are scared to death the whole way down.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie


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It ain't what you don't know that gets you into trouble.
It's what you know for sure that just ain't so.
- Mark Twain (attributed)

I love being married.
It's so great to find that one special person
you want to annoy for the rest of your life.
- Rita Rudner

The only fool bigger than the person who knows it all
is the person who argues with him.
- Stanislaw Jerszy Lec


 

Morality is simply the attitude we adopt
towards people whom we personally dislike.
- Oscar Wilde

The trick is growing up without growing old.
- Casey Stengel

Life's like Vegas. You're up, you're down,
but in the end the house always wins.
Doesn't mean you didn't have fun.
- the Woody Allen movie Deconstructing Harry

Old age is fifteen years older than I am.
- Oliver Wendell Holmes, Jr.

The most difficult phase of life
is not when no one understands you,
it is when you don't understand yourself.
- Anonymous

One man's remorse is another man's reminiscence.
- Ogden Nash

We are all in the gutter, but some of us are looking at the stars.
- Oscar Wilde

You can't make an omelet without breaking eggs.
- Anonymous

If life is a trial, who is the judge and jury?
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie

To the young child, all life is a great adventure -
when did we grow so dull and brittle.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie

In the book of life, the answers aren't in the back.
- Charles M. Schulz in his Peanuts cartoon

Life is what happens to you while you're busy making other plans.
- John Lennon

Nothing so needs reforming as other people's habits.
- Mark Twain

Life is a journey - enjoy the journey.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie

Life is serious, get out your magic wand.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie

Life would be infinitely happier if we could only be born
at the age of eighty and gradually approach eighteen.
- Mark Twain

Live life on the edge, not with an edge.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie

The difference between school and life?
In school, you're taught a lesson and then given a test.
In life, you're given a test that teaches you a lesson.
- Tom Bodett

One does not leave a convivial party before closing time.
- Winston Churchill

Life is defined more by its contrasts than its samenesses;
Life is defined more by its risks than the many securities.
- Mary Anne Radmacher

Life is always lived in the eye-of-the-storm
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie

Life only
appears to be
rushing toward us
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie

No matter how much cats fight,
there always seem to be plenty of kittens.
- Abraham Lincoln

When dealing with people, remember you are
not dealing with creatures of logic,
but creatures of emotion.
- Dale Carnegie

Life is a reflection of intent.
Love reflects love.
Hate reflects hate.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie

I Dream This Day of Wondrous Things,
of Peace and Hope and Pride.
I Dance My Dance with Life Today,
I'm Filled with Love Inside.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie

Life is a succession of lessons
which must be lived to be understood.
- Helen Keller

She generally gave herself very good advice,
(though she very seldom followed it).
- Lewis Carroll

Laugh when you can,
apologize when you should,
and let go of what you can't change.
Life's too short to be anything... but happy.
- Anonymous

I can't go back to yesterday -
because I was a different person then.
- Lewis Carroll

Normal is not something to aspire to,
it's something to get away from.
- Jodie Foster

Bringing a childlike wonder
and a beginner's mind to life
maximizes both success and joy.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie

Every man prefers belief to the exercise of judgment.
- Lucius Annaeus Seneca

A common denominator of all religions is that
they have the power to bring out the best and the worst in people.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie

The power of man has grown in every sphere, except over himself.
- Winston Churchill

It is a truth universally acknowledged that
when one part of your life starts going okay,
another falls spectacularly to pieces.
- the movie Bridget Jones Diary

I love and treasure individuals as I meet them;
I loathe and despise the groups
they identify with and belong to.
- George Carlin

Life is really simple,
but we insist on making it complicated.
- Confucius

Any idiot can face a crisis.
It's the day-to-day living that wears you out.
- Anton Chekhov

In critical moments men sometimes see
exactly what they wish to see.
- the character Spock of the television series Star Trek

Life is without meaning.
You bring the meaning to it.
The meaning of life is
whatever you ascribe it to be.
Being alive is the meaning.
- Joseph Campbell

Sucking the marrow out of life
doesn't mean choking on the bone.
- Robin Williams as John Keating
in the 1989 movie Dead Poets Society

I never accepted the idea
that I had to be guided by
some pattern or blueprint.
- Little Richard

Here's a toast to your new bride who has everything a girl
could want in her life, except for good taste in men.
- Anonymous

Today is your day to laugh at life,
laugh at what's funny - laugh at what's sad,
laugh loud - laugh often,
laugh at me - laugh at you - laugh at life.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie

Knavery and flattery are blood relations.
- Abraham Lincoln

Life is lived in the living.
Set aside convention, caution,
and arbitrary "rules" about how
life is supposed to be lived.
Choose! Explore! Adventure!
Live life to the fullest.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie

You are Never Too Old to Give or Get Gold Stars.
Show Your Honest Appreciation - Today.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie

Most people with low self-esteem have earned it.
- George Carlin

Life is not supposed to be fair.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie

Play with life, laugh with life,
dance lightly with life,
and smile at the riddles of life,
knowing that life's only true lessons
are writ small in the margin.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie

One can never consent to creep when one feels the impulse to soar.
- Helen Keller

The life of inner peace,
being harmonious and without stress,
is the easiest type of existence.
- Norman Vincent Peale

It is hard enough to remember my opinions,
without also remembering my reasons for them!
- Friedrich Nietzsche

Life is too important to be taken seriously.
- Oscar Wilde

We have a great life here in Alaska,
and we're never going back to America again!
- The Simpsons Movie (2007)

I have found that if you love life,
life will love you back.
- Arthur Rubinstein

All people know the same truth.
Our lives consist of how we chose to distort it.
- the Woody Allen movie Deconstructing Harry

Thousands of candles can be lit from a single candle,
and the life of the candle will not be shortened.
Happiness never decreases by being shared.
- The Buddha

You don't have the power to make life "fair,"
but you do have the power to make life joyful.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie

Take time to play!
Ask for what you want.
Laugh.
Live loudly.
Be avid.
Learn a new thing.
Be Yourself!
- Mary Anne Radmacher

They have come up with a perfect understanding.
He won't try to run her life,
and he won't try to run his, either.
- Anonymous

It's never too late -
never too late to start over,
never too late to be happy.
- Jane Fonda

Iron rusts from disuse;
water loses its purity from stagnation...
even so does inaction sap the vigor of the mind.
- Leonardo da Vinci


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May the world be kind to you,
and may your own thoughts be gentle upon yourself.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie


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