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Let these funny Jailer Quotes from my large collection of funny quotes about life add a little humor to your day.
Conformity is the jailer of freedom and the enemy of growth.
- John F. Kennedy
We cannot expect that all nations will adopt like systems,
for conformity is the jailer of freedom and the enemy of growth.
- John F. Kennedy
A friend is someone who will bail you out of jail.
A best friend is the one sitting next
to you saying "boy was that fun."
- The Maugles
I submit that an individual who breaks the law
that conscience tells him is unjust
and willingly accepts the penalty by staying in jail
to arouse the conscience of the community over its injustice,
is in reality expressing the very highest respect for law.
- Martin Luther King, Jr.
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The proper office of a friend is to side with you
when you are in the wrong.
Nearly anybody will side with you when you are in the right.
- Mark Twain
A friend will tell you she saw your old boyfriend -
and he's a priest.
- Erma Bombeck
A friend doesn't go on a diet because you are fat.
- Erma Bombeck
Outside of a dog, a book is man's best friend.
Inside of a dog, it's too dark to read.
- Groucho Marx
Barf: I'm a mog: half man, half dog. I'm my own best friend!
- the movie Spaceballs (1987)
The holy passion of Friendship is of so sweet
and steady and loyal and enduring a nature
that it will last through a whole lifetime,
if not asked to lend money.
- Mark Twain
My wife ran off with my best friend, and I sure do miss him.
- Anonymous
You want a friend in Washington? Get a dog.
- Harry S. Truman
I was the kid next door's imaginary friend.
- Emo Phillips
The feeling of friendship is like that
of being comfortably filled with roast beef;
love, like being enlivened with champagne.
- Samuel Johnson
Except in cases of necessity, which are rare,
leave your friend to learn
unpleasant things from his enemies;
they are ready enough to tell them.
- Oliver Wendell Holmes, Jr.
A lifelong friend is someone
you haven't borrowed money from yet.
- Anonymous
I'm a very loyal and unreliable friend.
- Bono
A true friend stabs you in the front.
- Oscar Wilde
A true friend is one who
overlooks your failures
and tolerates your success.
- Doug Larson
Do not use a hatchet to remove
a fly from your friend's forehead.
- Chinese Proverb
I never considered a difference of opinion
in politics, in religion, in philosophy,
as cause for withdrawing from a friend.
- Thomas Jefferson
The enemy of my enemy is my friend.
- Arabic Proverb and Chinese Proverb
A loyal friend laughs at your jokes
when they're not so good,
and sympathizes with your problems
when they're not so bad.
- Arnold H. Glasgow
A friend is someone who knows all about you,
and loves you just the same.
- Elbert Hubbard
A true friend is someone who
thinks that you are a good egg
even though he knows that
you are slightly cracked.
- Bernard Meltzer
The most called-upon prerequisite of a friend is an accessible ear.
- Maya Angelou
This day I will marry my friend,
the one I laugh with, live for, dream with, love.
- Anonymous
The walls we build around us to
keep sadness out also keeps out the joy.
- Jim Rohn
The price of freedom for a nation is lives and money.
Often, the price of freedom for an individual
is challenging the closed minds of family and friend.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie
I never found a companion that was
so companionable as solitude.
- Henry David Thoreau
The language of Friendship is not words, but meanings.
It is an intelligence above language.
- Henry David Thoreau
The easiest kind of friendship for me
is with ten thousand people.
The hardest is with one.
- Joan Baez
Our chief want is someone who will inspire us
to be what we know we could be.
- Ralph Waldo Emerson
The most beautiful discovery true friends make is that
they can grow separately without growing apart.
- Elisabeth Foley
The finest kind of friendship is between people
who expect a great deal of each other but never ask it.
- Anonymous
The meeting of two personalities is
like the contact of two chemical substances:
if there is any reaction, both are transformed.
- Carl Jung
The happiest moments my heart knows are those in which
it is pouring forth its affections to a few esteemed characters.
- Thomas Jefferson
The greatest gift is a portion of thyself.
- Ralph Waldo Emerson
Farewell My Friend
It was beautiful as long as it lasted
The journey of my life.
I have no regrets whatsoever
save the pain I'll leave behind.
Those dear hearts who love and care...
And the strings pulling at the heart and soul...
The strong arms that held me up
When my own strength let me down.
At every turning of my life
I came across good friends,
Friends who stood by me,
Even when the time raced me by.
Farewell, farewell my friends
I smile and bid you goodbye.
No, shed no tears for I need them not
All I need is your smile.
If you feel sad do think of me
for that's what I'll like
when you live in the hearts
of those you love, remember then
you never die.
- Gitanjali Ghei
The key is to keep company only with people who uplift you,
whose presence calls forth your best.
- Epictetus
The greatest compliment that was ever paid me
was when one asked me what I thought,
and attended to my answer.
- Henry David Thoreau
A real friend is one who walks in
when the rest of the world walks out.
- Walter Winchell
The best way to destroy an enemy
is to make him a friend.
- Abraham Lincoln
If we would build on a sure foundation in friendship,
we must love our friend for their sakes
rather than for our own.
- Charlotte Bronte
A friend knows the song in my heart
and sings it to me when my memory fails.
- Donna Roberts
You are my friend when you can guard my failure,
challenge my thought and celebrate my success.
- Anonymous
The best friend is the man who in wishing me well
wishes it for my sake.
- Anonymous
A friend is one before whom I can think aloud.
- Ralph Waldo Emerson
A true friend never gets in your way
unless you happen to be going down.
- Arnold H. Glasgow
When it hurts to look back,
and you're scared to look ahead,
you can look beside you
and your best friend will be there.
- Anonymous
An old friend will help you move.
A good friend will help you move a dead body.
- Jim Hayes
The good man is the friend of all living things.
- Mohandas (Mahatma) Gandhi
Walking with a friend in the dark is better
than walking alone in the light.
- Helen Keller
A true friend is a rock upon whom you can depend.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie
Be true to your work, your word, and your friend.
- Henry David Thoreau
A best friend is like a four leaf clover,
hard to find and lucky to have.
- Anonymous
You only meet your once in a lifetime friend ...
once in a lifetime.
- Little Rascals
It takes a long time to grow an old friend.
- John Leonard
Each friend represents a world in us,
a world possibly not born until they arrive,
and it is only by this meeting that a new world is born.
- Anais Nin
Be slow in choosing a friend, slower in changing.
- Benjamin Franklin
The glory of friendship is not the outstretched hand,
nor the kindly smile, nor the joy of companionship;
it is the spiritual inspiration that comes to one
when he discovers that someone else believes in him
and is willing to trust him with his friendship.
- Ralph Waldo Emerson
The only reward of virtue is virtue;
the only way to have a friend is to be one.
- Ralph Waldo Emerson
Better to be a nettle in the side of your friend than his echo.
- Ralph Waldo Emerson
He's my friend that speaks well of me behind my back.
- Thomas Fuller
A holiday, the day I first named you, "friend."
- Mary Anne Radmacher
Work Hard. Do your best. Keep your word.
Never get too big for your britches.
Trust in God. Have no fear;
and Never forget a friend.
- Harry S. Truman
When one gets angry, it is always angry AT someone -
perhaps a friend or spouse, perhaps a stranger,
perhaps the nameless "they" - "those people at the bank wronged me,"
perhaps God, or perhaps oneself.
In any case, when one gets angry,
they want to find someone to be "responsible" for what happened.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie
A friend is someone who won't stop
until he finds you and brings you home.
- Fraser Sr. in the movie Due South
One loyal friend is worth ten thousand relatives.
- Euripides
What is a friend? I will tell you ...
it is someone with whom you dare to be yourself.
- Frank Crane
A true friend is a source of strength and hope.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie
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May the world be kind to you,
and may your own thoughts be gentle upon yourself.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie
All materials & writings are copyright © Jonathan Lockwood Huie, except for quotes and other specifically identified material which belong to their respective copyright holders if applicable.