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Funny Internet Quotes
Funny Quotes about Internet

Let these funny Internet Quotes from my large collection of funny quotes about life add a little humor to your day.

The day I made that statement, about the inventing the internet,
I was tired because I'd been up all night inventing the Camcorder.
- Al Gore

Yet in this global economy, no jobs are safe.
High-speed Internet connections and low-cost,
skilled labor overseas are an explosive combination.
- Bob Taft

The Internet is the most important single development
in the history of human communication since the invention of call waiting.
- Dave Barry

Getting information off the Internet is like taking
a drink from a fire hydrant.
- Mitchell Kapor


 

The internet is not for sissies.
- Paul Vixie

I have an almost religious zeal...
not for technology per se, but for the Internet which is for me,
the nervous system of mother Earth, which I see as a living creature,
linking up.
- Dan Millman

Just as we could have rode into the sunset,
along came the Internet, and it tripled the significance of the PC.
- Andy Grove


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If net neutrality goes away, it will fundamentally
change everything about the Internet.
- James Hilton

The new information technology...
Internet and e-mail...
have practically eliminated the physical costs of communications.
- Peter Drucker

I am regularly asked what the average Internet user
can do to ensure his security.
My first answer is usually 'Nothing;
you're screwed'.
- Bruce Scheneier

The Internet treats censorship as a malfunction and routes around it.
- John Perry Barlow

It's been my policy to view the Internet not as an 'information highway,'
but as an electronic asylum filled with babbling loonies.
- Mike Royko

The Internet is a powerful way to make lots of money...
But we are not going to buy Yahoo!
- Sumner Redstone

Congress will pass a law restricting public comment
on the Internet to individuals who have spent a minimum
of one hour actually accomplishing a specific task while on line.
- Andy Grove

Access to computers and the Internet has become a basic
need for education in our society.
- Kent Conrad

The Internet: transforming society and shaping the future through chat.
- Dave Barry

The internet is a great way to get on the net.
- Bob Dole

I was afraid of the internet...
because I couldn't type.
- Jack Welch

We're still in the first minutes of the first day of the Internet revolution.
- Scott Cook

You can't trust the internet.
- Nicolette Sheridan

The Internet is a telephone system that's gotten uppity.
- Clifford Stoll

The Internet is not just one thing, it's a collection of things -
of numerous communications networks that all speak
the same digital language.
- Jim Clark

In Japan, they have TV sets in cars right now,
where you can punch up traffic routes,
weather, everything!
You can get Internet access already in cars in Japan,
so within the next 2 to 3 years it's gonna be so crazy!
- Glenn Danzig

Globalization, as defined by rich people like us,
is a very nice thing...
you are talking about the Internet,
you are talking about cell phones,
you are talking about computers.
This doesn't affect two-thirds of the people of the world.
- Jimmy Carter

The Internet is just bringing all kinds of information into the home.
There's just a lot of distraction, a lot of competition
for the parent's voice to resonate in the children's ears.
- Phil McGraw

I don't even own my own name on the internet -
somebody else bought it.
- Cat Deeley

The most important ways in which I think the Internet
will affect the big issue is that it will make it more
difficult for government to collect taxes.
- Milton Friedman

Five or ten years ago, when it was clear the Internet
was becoming a mainstream phenomenon,
it was equally clear that a lot of people were being
left out and could be left behind.
- Steve Case

I have been involved in Internet-related policy for
approximately one decade,
and I have been using the Internet myself for almost that period of time.
- Rick Boucher

There is an underlying, fundamental reliance on the Internet,
which continues to grow in the number of users,
country penetration and both fixed and wireless broadband access.
- Vinton Cerf

I think they called me the closest thing to a God of the Internet.
- Jon Postel

I'll happily mentor anyone who wants mentoring,
and most of that goes on by internet rather than face to face.
- Bernard Cornwell

Google is in an amazing position to be the target of
tons of lawsuits that will set precedent for many important
things for us on the Internet.
- Joichi Ito

Just as the strength of the Internet is chaos,
so the strength of our liberty depends upon the chaos
and cacophony of the unfettered speech the First Amendment protects.
- Judge Dalzell

Who needs fan mail when you have the Internet?
- Nuno Bettencourt

When I get up, I have a cup of coffee,
surf the Internet, then do a half-hour run.
- Katarina Witt

Those who are seeking ways to tap into the potential
of e-mail will find themselves in a position to capitalize
on the pending explosion in Internet usage.
- Alexander Haig

I don't know when the Return of the Living Dead are happening.
That's been on the Internet for years.
- Tobe Hooper

The internet is a total inversion of television.
It's the opposite.
- Joel Hodgson

I see the Internet as the next big deal -
I wanted to get in on it early on so I wouldn't get behind it all.
- Bruce Campbell

Nuclear holocaust might eliminate the Internet.
- Taylor Hanson

There was one issue on which there seemed to be almost unanimity:
the Internet should not be managed by any government,
national or multinational.
- Jon Postel

On the Internet, inside information is currency,
and there will always be counterfeiters among us.
- J. Michael Straczynski

Vivendi will be one of the very few top communications
groups of the Internet age.
We will have customers all over the globe,
providing services through all kinds of technology.
- Jean-Marie Messier

About five, six FBI agents walked into the courthouse and arrested me.
They said I was being arrested for distribution of
information related to explosives over the Internet.
- Sherman Austin

The future is electronic.
It's radio, television and the Internet;
it's not really newspapers anymore.
- Will McDonough

Uncollected sales taxes on Internet purchases cost
the states more than $16 billion in 2001.
- Bill Delahunt

I read on the Internet that I was dead.
- Fiona Apple

Kids don't go out and buy CDs, they make their own,
they download them from the Internet.
- Sebastian Bach

I also follow chess on the Internet,
where Kasparov's site is very interesting.
- Boris Spassky

The Internet is the first thing that humanity has built
that humanity doesn't understand,
the largest experiment in anarchy that we have ever had.
- Eric Schmidt

The Internet is becoming the town square for the global village of tomorrow.
- Bill Gates

Explicit material is available in a variety of forums -
from popular music to television to the Internet.
- Tipper Gore

At the bottom, the elimination of spyware and the preservation
of privacy for the consumer are critical goals if the
Internet is to remain safe and reliable and credible.
- Cliff Stearns

I'll tell you, I think that the Internet has provided
an enormous boost to film criticism by giving people
an opportunity to self publish or to find sites that are friendly.
- Roger Ebert

We live in a connected world now.
Some find that frightening.
If people are downloading our music,
they're listening to it.
The internet is like radio for us.
- Jeff Tweedy

I do most of my business on that dirty Internet that
you were just talking about,
where I find there is a lot of freedom to report exactly what I want.
- Matt Drudge

The web site and the Internet are a whole new ball game.
- Johnny Rivers

As the most participatory form of mass speech yet developed,
the Internet deserves the highest protection from government intrusion.
- Judge Dalzell

All three networks have always had a morning show but
now cable of course is taking some of that audience
away and a variety of other things,
probably the Internet as well.
- Katie Couric

The Internet is the Viagra of big business.
- Jack Welch

There's something on the Internet called the White Resistance Manual.
It's pretty much for white supremacists.
- Sherman Austin

When you think of Napster, you think of music.
But the first thing that struck me was that this was
an important case not only for the music industry but for the whole Internet.
- David Boies

The federal government seeks to control and regulate the Internet,
but the last thing this Congress should be doing is
trying to stifle public debate online.
- Dennis Hastert

Putting a stop to internet gambling is a necessary
reform that targets flagrant violations of state and federal laws.
- John Shadegg

The story of the Internet is this incredibly strong,
exciting change.
- James Daly

We talked about the Internet and Wikipedia and how
facts and history are being collectively created online.
- Joichi Ito

Well, the future of the Internet is...
Reality.
- Daniel Keys Moran

One of the problems with the Internet is that a lot
of times it is inaccurate.
- Vince McMahon

People who say that the Internet is the bubble are incredibly misguided.
- James Daly

The fact that the internet is so active;
people can now speak to me indirectly.
- Randy Bachman


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