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Funny Gospel Quotes
Funny Quotes about Gospel

Let these funny Gospel Quotes from my large collection of funny quotes about life add a little humor to your day.

The Christian missionary may preach the gospel
to the poor naked heathen,
but the spiritual heathen who populate Europe
have as yet heard nothing of Christianity.
- Carl Jung

Socialism is a philosophy of failure,
the creed of ignorance,
and the gospel of envy,
its inherent virtue is
the equal sharing of misery.
- Winston Churchill

Preach the Gospel at all times and when necessary use words.
- St. Francis of Assisi

If someone had told me I would be Pope one day,
I would have studied harder.
- Pope John Paul I


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If Christ were here now there is one thing
he would not be - a Christian.
- Mark Twain

Lord, grant that I might not so much
seek to be loved as to love.
- St. Francis of Assisi

Anyone who thinks sitting in church
can make you a Christian must also think
that sitting in a garage can make you a car.
- Garrison Keillor


 

Do not let Sunday be taken from you.
If your soul has no Sunday, it becomes an orphan.
- Albert Schweitzer

If you can't feed a hundred people, then feed just one.
- Mother Teresa

I have a dream that one day every valley shall be exalted,
every hill and mountain shall be made low,
the rough places will be made straight
and the glory of the Lord shall be revealed
and all flesh shall see it together.
- Martin Luther King, Jr.

Comfort and prosperity have never enriched
the world as much as adversity has.
- Billy Graham

For those of true faith, death is not a time to mourn,
but a time to celebrate returning to the Creator.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie

Sunday clears away the rust of the whole week.
- Joseph Addison

A new command I give you: Love one another.
As I have loved you, so you must love one another.
- Jesus of Nazareth (John 13:34)

Christmas waves a magic wand over this world,
and behold, everything is softer and more beautiful.
- Norman Vincent Peale

Our Lord has written the promise of the resurrection,
not in books alone, but in every leaf in spring-time.
- Martin Luther

This too, shall pass.
- Bible

If anyone has material possessions and sees his brother in need
but has no pity on him, how can the love of God be in him?
- 1 John 3:17

In boundless love as a Christian and as a man
I read through the passage which tells us
how the Lord at last rose in His might
and seized the scourge to drive out of the Temple
the brood of vipers and of adders.
- Adolf Hitler

If you believe in forever,
then life is just a one night stand.
- The Righteous Brothers

We are all pencils in the hand of God.
- Mother Teresa

The most telling act of true Faith
is celebrating the death of a loved one
with the certain knowledge that
they are now in a better place.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie

The miracle is not that we do this work,
but that we are happy to do it.
- Mother Teresa

Compassion and generosity must be the heart of any true religion.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie

Lord, make me an instrument of thy peace.
Where there is hatred, let me sow love.
- St. Francis of Assisi

Let us touch the dying, the poor,
the lonely and the unwanted
according to the graces we have received
and let us not be ashamed
or slow to do the humble work.
- Mother Teresa

To be a Christian without prayer
is no more possible than to be alive without breathing.
- Martin Luther King, Jr.

"Just living is not enough," said the butterfly,
"one must have sunshine, freedom and a little flower."
- Hans Christian Andersen

You have heard that it was said,
"Love your neighbor and hate your enemy."
But I tell you: Love your enemies and pray for those who persecute you.
- Matthew 5:43-44

We must be ready to learn from one another,
not claiming that we alone possess all truth
and that somehow we have a corner on God.
- Archbishop Desmond Tutu

The will of God will never take you
to where the grace of God will not protect you.
- Anonymous

As a man thinketh in his heart, so is he.
- The Bible

When all is said and done,
the one sole condition that makes
spiritual happiness and preserves it
is the absence of doubt.
- Mark Twain

Humility is not thinking less of yourself,
it's thinking of yourself less.
- Rick Warren (author of The Purpose Driven(R) Life)

Lord, make me an instrument of thy peace.
- St Francis of Assisi

Love one another.
- Jesus of Nazareth

It is my desire, in the office of a Christian minister,
to do nothing which I cannot do with my whole heart.
Having said this, I have said all.
- Ralph Waldo Emerson

Christian voters should start looking
at global warming and extreme poverty
as religious issues that speak to the culture of life.
- Al Franken

O Divine Master, grant that I may not so much seek
to be consoled as to console;
to be understood as to understand;
to be loved as to love.
For it is in giving that we receive;
it is in pardoning that we are pardoned;
and it is in dying that we are born to eternal life.
- St. Francis of Assisi

A new friend is like new wine;
when it has aged you will drink it with pleasure.
- Ecclesiastes 9:10

Forgive Your Brother from Your Heart.
- Matthew 18:21-22

No man ever prayed heartily without learning something.
- Ralph Waldo Emerson

For as he thinketh in his heart, so is he.
- Proverbs 23:7

The great gift of Easter is hope -
Christian hope which makes us have that confidence in God,
in his ultimate triumph, and in his goodness and love,
which nothing can shake.
- Basil C. Hume

Joy is a net of love by which you can catch souls.
- Mother Teresa

To everything there is a season,
and a time to every purpose under heaven:
A time to be born, and a time to die.
- Ecclesiastes 3:1

It cannot be wisdom to assert the truth of one faith over another.
In our troubled world so full of contradictions,
the wise person makes justice his guide and learns from all.
- Akbar the Great (1542-1605)

Bold Light of Spirit:
Out of the darkness and into the light,
Open our eyes and behold such a sight.
Brilliance of day takes the place of the night,
Boldness and courage are swords of His Might.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie

God creates out of nothing. Wonderful you say.
Yes, to be sure, but he does what is still more wonderful:
he makes saints out of sinners.
- Soren Kierkegaard

God may be subtle, but he isn't plain mean.
- Albert Einstein

Christmas ... is not a date. It is a state of mind.
- Mary Ellen Chase

I do not pray for success,
I ask for faithfulness.
- Mother Teresa

Not paying a just wage, not giving work,
only because one is looking at the bottom line,
at the budget of the company, seeking only profit -
that is against God.
- Pope Francis

I hate to see complacency prevail in our lives
when it's so directly contrary to the teaching of Christ.
- Jimmy Carter

Each one of them is Jesus in disguise.
- Mother Teresa

The way to see by faith is to shut the eye of reason.
- Benjamin Franklin [attributed]

Prayer is simply a two-way conversation between you and God.
- Billy Graham

The Spirit is described in the Holy Scriptures
as much more anarchic than any established religion credits.
- Bono

Ask and you shall receive, that your joy may be full.
- John 16:24

If God can work through me, he can work through anyone.
- St. Francis of Assisi

Don't hide your light under a bushel.
- The Bible

Love your enemies, bless them that curse you,
do good to them that hate you, and pray for them
which despitefully use you and persecute you.
- Matthew 5:44

Let us not be satisfied with just giving money.
Money is not enough, money can be got,
but they need your hearts to love them.
So, spread your love everywhere you go.
- Mother Teresa

Lord, make me an instrument of your peace,
Where there is hatred, let me sow love;
where there is injury, pardon;
...
For it is in giving that we receive;
it is in pardoning that we are pardoned.
- attributed to St. Francis of Assisi

When you read God's Word, you must
constantly be saying to yourself,
"It is talking to me, and about me."
- Soren Kierkegaard

Preserve me, O God: for in thee do I put my trust.
- Psalm 16:1

Our prayers should be for blessings in general,
for God knows best what is good for us.
- Socrates

"Teacher, which is the greatest commandment in the Law?"
Jesus replied:
"'Love the Lord your God with all your heart
and with all your soul and with all your mind.'
This is the first and greatest commandment.
And the second is like it:
'Love your neighbor as yourself.'
All the Law and the Prophets hang on these two commandments."
- Matthew 22:36-40

Love is patient, love is kind.
It does not envy, it does not boast,
It is not proud. It does not dishonor others,
It is not self-seeking, it is not easily angered,
It keeps no record of wrongs.
Love does not delight in evil
but rejoices with the truth.
It always protects, always trusts,
always hopes, always perseveres.
Love never fails.
- Corinthians 13:4-8 (NIV)

I have been all things unholy.
If God can work through me, he can work through anyone.
- St. Francis of Assisi

As you sow, so shall you reap.
- Galatians 6:7


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May the world be kind to you,
and may your own thoughts be gentle upon yourself.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie


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