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Funny Quotes about Life
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Funny Fishing Quotes
Funny Quotes about Fishing

Let these funny Fishing Quotes from my large collection of funny quotes about life add a little humor to your day.

Time is but the stream I go a-fishing in.
- Henry David Thoreau

Many men go fishing all of their lives
without knowing that it is not fish they are after.
- Henry David Thoreau

When you fish for love, bait with your heart, not your brain.
- Mark Twain

Don't threaten me with a dead fish.
- the movie Withnail & I (1987)


 

Give the right man two fishes and some bread,
and he will feed the world;
give the wrong man two fishes and some bread
and he will invent the fast-food fish sandwich.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie

Everybody is a genius.
But if you judge a fish by its ability to climb a tree,
it will live its whole life believing that it is stupid.
- Albert Einstein

Guests, like fish, begin to smell after three days.
- Benjamin Franklin


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Only dead fish swim with the stream.
- Anonymous

Governing a great nation is like cooking a small fish -
too much handling will spoil it.
- Lao Tzu

Give a man a fish and he will eat for a day,
teach a man to fish and he will eat for a lifetime.
- Chinese Proverb

He that would fish, must venture his bait.
- Benjamin Franklin

Govern a great nation as you would cook a small fish.
Do not overdo it.
- Lao Tzu

He didn't come out of my belly, but my God,
I've made his bones, because I've attended to every meal,
and how he sleeps,
and the fact that he swims like a fish
because I took him to the ocean.
I'm so proud of all those things.
But he is my biggest pride.
- John Lennon

The River of Life has no judgments.
The River flows with no concept of good and bad - right and wrong.
The fields and dreams of men may be nourished by the River of Life,
or flooded and covered with silt, and the River just flows.
Men may catch fish and live on the River of Life,
or they may founder in a storm and drown, and the River just flows.
The River of Life is timeless.
It is not unchanging, but it is timeless,
and it changes in its own time.
The River of Life knows no obstacles.
The River can cut through solid rock - in its own time.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie

Humans are essentially storytellers.
- Walter Fisher

There is no point at which you can say,
"Well, I'm successful now.
I might as well take a nap."
- Carrie Fisher

A mother is not a person to lean on,
but a person to make leaning unnecessary.
- Dorothy Canfield Fisher

A person is smart. People are dumb,
panicky dangerous animals and you know it.
Fifteen hundred years ago everybody knew
the Earth was the center of the universe.
Five hundred years ago,
everybody knew the Earth was flat,
and fifteen minutes ago,
you knew that humans were alone on this planet.
Imagine what you'll know tomorrow.
- the movie Men in Black

Humans make illogical decisions.
- Spock (character in Star Trek movies and TV shows)

Humans are amphibians - half spirit and half animal.
As spirits they belong to the eternal world,
but as animals they inhabit time.
- C. S. Lewis

Humans are allergic to change.
They love to say, "We've always done it this way."
- Grace Hopper

We humans feel an instinctive need to know
what is coming next - what we can count upon.
We fear change - even the most positive change.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie

Humans do have an amazing capacity
for believing what they choose,
and excluding that which is painful.
- Spock (character in Star Trek television series)

Loneliness is not what it seems.
One does not feel lonely because one is alone,
but because of a feeling of lack -
a feeling that something is missing.
Loneliness is essentially independent
of how many other humans are around.
It has much more to do with one's self-esteem -
one's sense of inherent worth.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie

The only way to store information is by agreement.
The belief system is like a Book of Law that rules our mind.
Our biggest fear is taking the risk to be alive.
Humans punish themselves endlessly
for not being what they believe they should be.
We have the need to be accepted and to be loved by others,
but we cannot accept and love ourselves.
- don Miguel Ruiz

Let us CHOOSE to bless ALL those around us,
not with an EXPECTATION that they should be more evolved,
but with UNDERSTANDING, and with our INTENTION
for a magnificent future for all humans.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie

From the way most people live,
one would never guess that humans are beings of free will.
Repetition can be a choice, but often it isn't.
The athlete or pianist who practices the same routine
day after day, year after year, has their eye on a goal.
The unending repetition is a conscious choice
in the pursuit of a life dream.
But what about the sameness of most lives?
Observe the morning commute, the after-work drink,
the Sunday football game or religious service -
how many of those people are consciously following their dream,
training their mind, body, and spirit through that daily repetition?
And how many are mindlessly slogging through each day
out of habit and boredom?
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie

For me, the most powerful expressions of true Christianity
in this material world are an unconditional love of all humans,
and an uncompromising commitment to caring for all
who are sick, infirm, or troubled -
as expressed in the biblical story of the Good Samaritan.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie

I love being married.
It's so great to find that one special person
you want to annoy for the rest of your life.
- Rita Rudner

The only fool bigger than the person who knows it all
is the person who argues with him.
- Stanislaw Jerszy Lec

I've become the person I've always hated, but I'm happier.
- the Woody Allen movie Celebrity

To steal ideas from one person is plagiarism.
To steal from many is research.
- Anonymous

The person who says it cannot be done
should not interrupt the person who is doing it.
- Chinese proverb

A person who never made a mistake
never tried anything new.
- Albert Einstein

Credit is a system whereby a person who can't pay
gets another person who can't pay
to guarantee that he can pay.
- Charles Dickens

Think of how stupid the average person is,
and realize half of them are stupider than that.
- George Carlin

Inside every cynical person,
there is a disappointed idealist.
- George Carlin

I can't go back to yesterday -
because I was a different person then.
- Lewis Carroll

What would be the use of immortality to a person
who cannot use well a half an hour.
- Ralph Waldo Emerson

And you, Sonja, you look more beautiful
standing here than you do in person.
- the movie Love and Death (1975)

What sane person could live in this world and not be crazy?
- Ursula K. Le Guin

Tell me about a person's family, friends, and community,
and I'll tell you what his opinions are.
- Mark Twain
(paraphrase)

Man is least himself when he talks in his own person.
Give him a mask, and he will tell you the truth.
- Oscar Wilde

Friendship is born at that moment
when one person says to another,
"What! You too? I thought I was the only one."
- C. S. Lewis

Love is when the other person's happiness
is more important than your own.
- H. Jackson Brown, Jr.

A person who trusts no one can't be trusted.
- Jerome Blattner

The person who you're with most in life is yourself
and if you don't like yourself,
you're always with somebody you don't like.
- Marc S. Lewis

The shoe that fits one person pinches another;
there is no recipe for living that suits all cases.
- Carl Jung

If the person you are talking to doesn't appear to be listening, be patient.
It may simply be that he has a small piece of fluff in his ear.
- A. A. Milne (Winnie-The-Pooh)

There is an optical illusion about every person we meet.
- Ralph Waldo Emerson

It hurts to love someone
and not be loved in return,
but what is more painful is to love
someone and never find the courage
to let that person know how you feel.
- Anonymous

Resenting someone is a way of never leaving that person.
- Kare Anderson

We are afraid to care too much, for fear
that the other person does not care at all.
- Eleanor Roosevelt

The moment a person forms a theory,
his imagination sees in every object
only the traits which favor that theory.
- Thomas Jefferson

An unclean person is universally a slothful one.
- Henry David Thoreau

A competent and self-confident person is
incapable of jealousy in anything.
Jealousy is invariably a symptom of neurotic insecurity.
- Robert A. Heinlein

A person isn't who they are during
the last conversation you had with them -
they're who they've been
throughout your whole relationship.
- Rainer Maria Rilke

Jealousy is that pain which a man feels
from the apprehension that he is not equally beloved
by the person whom he entirely loves.
- Joseph Addison

Good for who? Good for what?
There is no absolute "good."
"Good" is simply one person's preference.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie

It was high counsel that I once heard given to a young person,
"Always do what you are afraid to do."
- Ralph Waldo Emerson

The most pathetic person in the world
is someone who has sight, but has no vision.
- Helen Keller

Resenting someone, or hating someone, ensures that
you can never emotionally escape that person.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie

It takes a long while for a naturally trustful person
to reconcile himself to the idea that
after all God will not help him
- H. L. Mencken

Being unwanted, unloved, uncared for, forgotten by everybody,
I think that is a much greater hunger,
a much greater poverty than the person who has nothing to eat.
- Mother Teresa

No person was ever honored for what he received.
Honor has been the reward for what he gave.
- Calvin Coolidge

Never say goodbye when you still want to try,
never give up when you still feel you can't take it.
Never say you don't love the person anymore
when you can't let go.
- Anonymous

We have nearly complete misunderstanding between
people of different faiths in Lake Wobegon,
and that's probably one reason why we get along so very well.
It's when you are trying to convince another person to think
the same way that you do that there is
friction and trouble between people.
But when you feel that the other person is
dumber than dirt, too dumb for words -
why waste your breath - you get along pretty well.
There's no bond between people that's quite so strong as
when people each feel slightly superior towards the other one.
- Garrison Keillor

We know what a person thinks not when he tells us
what he thinks, but by his actions.
- Isaac Bashevis Singe

If one does not understand a person,
one tends to regard him as a fool.
- Carl Jung

Truth is absolute, but only to one person.
My truth is absolute to me, and your truth is absolute to you.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie

A person acting from a motivation
of contribution and service
rises to such a level of moral authority
that worldly success is a natural result.
- Marianne Williamson


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- Jonathan Lockwood Huie

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