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Let these funny Fields Quotes from my large collection of funny quotes about life add a little humor to your day.
A rich man is nothing but a poor man with money.
- W. C. Fields
If at first you don't succeed,
try, try, and try again.
Then give up.
There's no use being a damned fool about it.
- W. C. Fields
The clever cat eats cheese and breathes down
rat holes with baited breath.
- W. C. Fields
Smile first thing in the morning. Get it over with.
- W. C. Fields
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It ain't what they call you, it's what you answer to.
- W. C. Fields
I am free of prejudice. I hate everyone equally.
- W. C. Fields
And you would accept the seasons of your heart
just as you have always accepted
that seasons pass over your fields
and you would watch with serenity
through the winters of your grief.
- Khalil Gibran
We shall defend our island, whatever the cost may be,
we shall fight on the beaches, we shall fight on the landing grounds,
we shall fight in the fields and in the streets,
we shall fight in the hills; we shall never surrender.
- Winston Churchill
If the sight of the blue skies fills you with joy,
if a blade of grass springing up in the fields has power to move you,
if the simple things in nature have a message you understand,
Rejoice, for your soul is alive.
- Eleanora Duse
May the road rise up to meet you,
may the wind be ever at your back.
May the sun shine warm upon your face
and the rain fall softly on your fields.
And until we meet again,
May God hold you in the hollow of his hand.
- Irish Blessing
The River of Life has no judgments.
The River flows with no concept of good and bad - right and wrong.
The fields and dreams of men may be nourished by the River of Life,
or flooded and covered with silt, and the River just flows.
Men may catch fish and live on the River of Life,
or they may founder in a storm and drown, and the River just flows.
The River of Life is timeless.
It is not unchanging, but it is timeless,
and it changes in its own time.
The River of Life knows no obstacles.
The River can cut through solid rock - in its own time.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie
The quality of a man's life is in direct proportion
to his commitment to excellence,
regardless of his chosen field of endeavor.
- Vince Lombardi
Never in the field of human conflict
was so much owed by so many to so few.
- Winston Churchill
Out beyond ideas of wrongdoing and right doing,
there is a field. I will meet you there.
- Rumi
Farming looks mighty easy when your plow is a pencil
and you're a thousand miles from the corn field.
- Dwight D. Eisenhower
When prayer removes distrust and doubt
and enters the field of mental certainty,
it becomes faith; and the universe is built on faith.
- Ernest Holmes
Home is where our loved ones are.
Home is not a structure, but the place that we feel comfortable,
the place we belong - the place of our loved ones.
A palace is not a home without loved ones.
A shack or an open field can be paradise
when shared with a loving family.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie
The supreme quality for leadership is unquestionably integrity.
Without it, no real success is possible,
no matter whether it is on a section gang,
a football field, in an army, or in an office.
- Dwight D. Eisenhower
If you build it, he will come.
- the movie Field of Dreams
When you follow your bliss, you put yourself on a kind of track
that has been there all the while waiting for you,
and the life you ought to be living is the one you are living.
When you can see that, you begin to meet people
who are in the field of your bliss,
and they open the doors to you.
I say, follow your bliss and don't be afraid,
and doors will open where you didn't know they were going to be.
If you follow your bliss,
doors will open for you that wouldn't have opened for anyone else.
- Joseph Campbell
The Sweetest Strawberry:
A man traveling across a field encountered a tiger.
He fled, the tiger after him.
Coming to a precipice,
he caught hold of the root of a wild vine
and swung himself over the edge.
The tiger sniffed at him from above.
Trembling, the man looked down to where,
far below, another tiger was waiting to eat him.
Only the vine sustained him.
Two mice, one white and one black,
little by little started to gnaw away the vine.
The man then saw a luscious strawberry near him.
Grasping the vine with one hand,
he plucked the strawberry with the other.
How sweet it tasted.
- Zen Koan
The rarest quality in an epitaph is truth.
- Henry David Thoreau
The first quality that is needed is audacity.
- Winston Churchill
If we take the generally accepted definition of bravery
as a quality which knows no fear, I have never seen a brave man.
All men are frightened. The more intelligent they are,
the more they are frightened.
- George S. Patton
It is the quality of the moment,
not the number of days, or events, or of actors, that imports.
- Ralph Waldo Emerson
The quality of mercy is not strained.
It droppeth as the gentle rain from heaven
Upon the place beneath. It is twice blest:
It blesseth him that gives and him that takes.
- William Shakespeare
Courage is rightly esteemed the first of human qualities...
because it is the quality which guarantees all others.
- Winston Churchill
Youth is a quality, not a matter of circumstances.
- Frank Lloyd Wright
Be a yardstick of quality.
Some people aren't used to an environment
where excellence is expected.
- Steve Jobs
There is more difference in the quality
of our pleasures than in the amount.
- Ralph Waldo Emerson
Creativity is the quality that you bring
to the activity that you are doing.
It is an attitude, an inner approach -
how you look at things.
- Osho
Honor your past, and all the consequences of that past.
Receive insight into relieving the pain
caused by past experiences and current attitudes toward life.
Observe life as it currently appears,
and then train yourself to observe life
from other perspectives that support a higher quality of living.
Re-consider your priorities.
Chart your Course.
Set Sail with Courage.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie
You will never do anything in this world without courage.
It is the greatest quality of the mind next to honor.
- James Allen
The quality, not the longevity, of one's life is what is important.
- Martin Luther King, Jr.
At all times and under all circumstances,
we have the power to transform the quality of our lives.
- Werner Erhard
Non-violence, which is the quality of the heart,
cannot come by an appeal to the brain.
- Mohandas (Mahatma) Gandhi
Honor bespeaks worth. Confidence begets trust.
Service brings satisfaction.
Cooperation proves the quality of leadership.
- James Cash Penney
Instead of needing lots of children,
we need high-quality children.
- Margaret Mead
It is the quality of our work which will please God
and not the quantity.
- Mohandas (Mahatma) Gandhi
A nation which has forgotten the quality of courage
which in the past has been brought to public life
is not as likely to insist upon or regard
that quality in its chosen leaders today -
and in fact we have forgotten.
- John F. Kennedy
Walking is Zen, sitting is Zen.
Then what will be the quality?
Watchfully alert, joyously unmotivated,
centered, loving, flowing, one walks.
And the walking is sauntering.
Loving, alert, watchful, one sits, unmotivated -
not sitting for anything in particular,
just enjoying how beautiful
just sitting doing nothing is,
how relaxing, how restful.
- Osho
Just one quality of the Buddha has to be remembered.
He consists only of one quality: witnessing.
This small word witnessing contains the whole of spirituality.
Witness that you are not the body.
Witness that you are not the mind.
Witness that you are only a witness.
As the witnessing deepens,
you start becoming drunk with the divine.
That is what is called ecstasy.
- Osho
To affect the quality of the day,
that is the highest of arts.
- Henry David Thoreau
I think one of the finest gifts I can give
my friends in the holiday season is to pause
with a long enough quality to actually SEE them.
My calm, unhurried presence communicates
this gift of a message, "I see you. I recognize you.
I remember our times of together
and am contributing right now to another quality memory.
I value you and honor and take the time,
right this moment to pause long enough to truly notice you."
- Mary Anne Radmacher
Zen says that if you drop knowledge -
and within knowledge everything is included;
your name, your identity, everything,
because this has been given to you by others -
if you drop all that has been given by others,
you will have a totally different quality to your being: innocence.
This will be a crucifixion of the persona, the personality,
and there will be a resurrection of your innocence.
You will become a child again, reborn.
- Osho
Respect the masterpiece. It is true reverence to man.
There is no quality so great, none so much needed now.
- Frank Lloyd Wright
It is a truth universally acknowledged that
when one part of your life starts going okay,
another falls spectacularly to pieces.
- the movie Bridget Jones Diary
Strike an average between what a woman thinks of her husband
a month before she marries him
and what she thinks of him a year afterward,
and you will have the truth about him.
- H. L. Mencken
All people know the same truth.
Our lives consist of how we chose to distort it.
- the Woody Allen movie Deconstructing Harry
The lawyer's truth is not Truth,
but consistency or a consistent expediency.
- Henry David Thoreau
Always speak the truth,
think before you speak,
and write it down afterwards.
- Lewis Carroll
By and large, language is a tool for concealing the truth.
- George Carlin
If you are out to describe the truth,
leave elegance to the tailor.
- Albert Einstein
Truth is beautiful, without doubt; but so are lies.
- Ralph Waldo Emerson
If you're going to tell people the truth,
be funny or they'll kill you.
- Billy Wilder
A remark generally hurts in proportion to its truth.
- Will Rogers
Bad taste is simply saying the truth before it should be said.
- Mel Brooks
Truth is a tendency.
- R. Buckminster Fuller
My way of joking is telling the truth;
that is the funniest joke in the world.
- George Bernard Shaw
Truth is stranger than fiction,
but that is because Fiction is obliged
to stick to possibilities; Truth isn't.
- Mark Twain
The pure and simple truth is rarely pure and never simple.
- Oscar Wilde
Tell the truth, or someone will tell it for you.
- Stephanie Klein
If you tell the truth, you don't have to remember anything.
- Mark Twain
Man will occasionally stumble over the truth,
but most of the time he will pick himself up and continue on.
- Winston Churchill
Man is least himself when he talks in his own person.
Give him a mask, and he will tell you the truth.
- Oscar Wilde
When a thing is funny, search it for a hidden truth.
- George Bernard Shaw
The truth. It is a beautiful and terrible thing,
and should be treated with caution.
- J. K. Rowling
The water in a vessel is sparkling;
the water in the sea is dark.
The small truth has words which are clear;
the great truth has great silence.
- Rabindranath Tagore
Use the power of your word
in the direction of truth and love.
- don Miguel Ruiz
Soon we'll be out amid the cold world's strife.
Soon we'll be sliding down the razor blade of life.
But as we go our sordid sep'rate ways,
We shall ne'er forget thee, thou golden college days.
Hearts full of youth,
Hearts full of truth,
Six parts gin to one part vermouth.
- Tom Lehrer - song: Bright College Days,
album: An Evening Wasted With Tom Lehrer
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May the world be kind to you,
and may your own thoughts be gentle upon yourself.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie
All materials & writings are copyright © Jonathan Lockwood Huie, except for quotes and other specifically identified material which belong to their respective copyright holders if applicable.