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Let these funny Established Quotes from my large collection of funny quotes about life add a little humor to your day.
It is dangerous to be right in matters
on which the established authorities are wrong.
- Voltaire
The Spirit is described in the Holy Scriptures
as much more anarchic than any established religion credits.
- Bono
Have your new year's resolutions been a new beginning for you
or have they just been different words on the same old beginning?
Maybe now's the time to establish
a new pattern of viewing your life fresh.
- Mary Anne Radmacher
If one advances confidently in the direction of his dreams,
and endeavors to live the life which he has imagined,
he will meet with a success unexpected in common hours.
He will put some things behind, will pass an invisible boundary;
new, universal, and more liberal laws
will begin to establish themselves around and within him;
or the old laws be expanded, and interpreted in his favor
in a more liberal sense,
and he will live with the license of a higher order of beings.
- Henry David Thoreau
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To kill an error is as good a service as,
and sometimes even better than,
the establishing of a new truth or fact.
- Charles Darwin
If the United Nations once admits that international disputes
can be settled by using force,
then we will have destroyed the foundation of the organization
and our best hope of establishing a world order.
- Dwight D. Eisenhower
Law and order exist for the purpose of establishing justice
and when they fail in this purpose
they become the dangerously structured dams
that block the flow of social progress.
- Martin Luther King, Jr.
I wanted to see exotic Vietnam, the jewel of Southeast Asia.
I, uh, I wanted to meet interesting
and stimulating people of an ancient culture,
and kill them.
- the movie Full Metal Jacket
If you're going to tell people the truth,
be funny or they'll kill you.
- Billy Wilder
Join the army. Visit strange and exotic places.
Meet fascinating people. And kill them.
- Anonymous
The possession of knowledge does not
kill the sense of wonder and mystery.
There is always more mystery.
- Anais Nin
When you have to kill a man,
it costs nothing to be polite.
- Winston Churchill
Because we believe that our ethnic group,
our society, our political party, our God,
is better than your God, we kill each other.
- Neale Donald Walsch
The squirrel that you kill in jest, dies in earnest.
- Henry David Thoreau
Domestic policy can only defeat us; foreign policy can kill us.
- John F. Kennedy
The ugliest word in the world is revenge.
It spells hate; it spells fear; it spells greed.
For my loss, I must kill; I must steal - must avenge.
It's your fault; you must pay; you must bleed.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie
As if you could kill time without injuring eternity.
- Henry David Thoreau
If anyone is crazy enough to want to kill
a president of the United States, he can do it.
All he must be prepared to do is give his life for the president's.
- John F. Kennedy
I am prepared to die, but there is no cause
for which I am prepared to kill.
- Mohandas (Mahatma) Gandhi
A prisoner of war is a man who tries to kill you and fails,
and then asks you not to kill him.
- Winston Churchill
What doesn't kill me, makes me stronger.
- Friedrich Nietzsche
Remain in wonder if you want the mysteries to open up for you.
Mysteries never open up for those who go on questioning.
Questioners sooner or later end up in a library.
Questioners sooner or later end up with scriptures,
because scriptures are full of answers.
And answers are dangerous, they kill your wonder.
- Osho
Each of us holds a different image of God.
There are as many perspectives on
the nature of God as there are people.
However much any of us may choose to argue,
or to fight and kill, for our point of view,
the nature of God is an unanswerable question.
Perhaps there is a specific answer,
that we will never learn - in this lifetime.
Perhaps the nature of God is so complex and multifaceted
that each view of God describes an aspect of the complex whole.
Or perhaps the nature of God is actually defined by our beliefs.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie
I have often wanted to drown my troubles,
but I can't get my wife to go swimming.
- Anonymous
After fifteen minutes I wanted to marry her,
and after half an hour
I completely gave up the idea of stealing her purse.
- the movie Take the Money and Run (1969)
My boyfriend and I broke up.
He wanted to get married and I didn't want him to.
- Rita Rudner
Some people wanted champagne and caviar
when they should have had beer and hot dogs.
- Dwight D. Eisenhower
A somebody was once a nobody who wanted to and did.
- John Burroughs
In all our contacts, it is probably the sense
of being really needed and wanted
which gives us the greatest satisfaction
and creates the most lasting bond.
- Eleanor Roosevelt
In my prayers I never said I needed a home.
I said I wanted a sanctuary.
- Mary Anne Radmacher
Today is the right day to do
what you have long wanted to do.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie
Even the rich are hungry for love,
for being cared for, for being wanted,
for having someone to call their own.
- Mother Teresa
Piglet sidled up to Pooh from behind. "Pooh?" he whispered.
"Yes, Piglet?"
"Nothing," said Piglet, taking Pooh's hand.
"I just wanted to be sure of you."
- A. A. Milne (Winnie-The-Pooh)
Sometimes you get the results you wanted,
sometimes you don't.
What matters is that you did your best.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie
I wanted to know the name of every stone
and flower and insect and bird and beast.
I wanted to know where it got its color, where it got its life -
but there was no one to tell me.
- George Washington Carver
I wanted to be a doctor that I might be able to work
without having to talk
because for years I had been giving myself out in words.
- Albert Schweitzer
In the course of my life, I have often had to eat my words,
and I must confess that I have always found it a wholesome diet.
- Winston Churchill
Do not laugh much or often or unrestrainedly.
- Epictetus
The worst government is often the most moral.
One composed of cynics is often very tolerant and humane.
But when fanatics are on top there is no limit to oppression.
- H. L. Mencken
Money often costs too much.
- Ralph Waldo Emerson
If you refuse to accept anything but the best,
you very often get it.
- Somerset Maugham
Happiness is often the result of being too busy to be miserable.
- Anonymous
People say conversation is a lost art;
how often I have wished it were.
- Edward R. Murrow
Too often we... enjoy the comfort of opinion
without the discomfort of thought.
- John F. Kennedy
Too often the strong, silent man is silent only because
he does not know what to say, and is reputed strong
only because he has remained silent.
- Winston Churchill
Rules are mostly made to be broken
and are too often for the lazy to hide behind.
- Douglas MacArthur
One of the annoying things about believing in free will
and individual responsibility is the difficulty
of finding somebody to blame your problems on.
And when you do find somebody, it's remarkable
how often his picture turns up on your driver's license.
- P. J. O'Rourke
Today is your day to laugh at life,
laugh at what's funny - laugh at what's sad,
laugh loud - laugh often,
laugh at me - laugh at you - laugh at life.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie
The darkest night is often the bridge to the brightest tomorrow.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie
Worry often gives a small thing a big shadow.
- Swedish Proverb
The price of freedom for a nation is lives and money.
Often, the price of freedom for an individual
is challenging the closed minds of family and friend.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie
It is better to light a candle than to curse the darkness.
- Chinese proverb often quoted by Eleanor Roosevelt
Know the best and highest choices for health
and more often choose those things.
- Mary Anne Radmacher
Mostly, it is human to dislike surprises -
often with great intensity.
Be open to new ways;
sometimes newness just knocks on our door;
welcome it.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie
It's a funny thing about life;
if you refuse to accept anything but the best,
you very often get it.
- W. Somerset Maugham
In time we hate that which we often fear.
- William Shakespeare
Live boldly. Laugh Loudly. Love Truly.
Play as often as you can
Work as smart as you are able.
Share your heart as deeply as you can reach.
- Mary Anne Radmacher
From the deepest desires often come the deadliest hate.
- Socrates
Often the hands will solve a mystery
that the intellect has struggled with in vain.
- Carl Jung
To laugh often and much;
to win the respect of intelligent people
and the affection of children,
to leave the world a better place,
to know even one life has breathed easier
because you have lived,
this is to have succeeded.
- Ralph Waldo Emerson
Indifference and neglect often
do much more damage than outright dislike.
- J. K. Rowling
Live Well, Love Much, Laugh Often.
- Anonymous
No man stands so tall as when he stoops to help a child.
- Anonymous (often attributed to Abraham Lincoln)
It is often easier to ask for forgiveness
than to ask for permission.
- Grace Hopper
Intense feeling too often obscures the truth.
- Harry S. Truman
Avoiding danger is no safer
in the long run than outright exposure.
The fearful are caught as often as the bold.
- Helen Keller
People often say that motivation doesn't last.
Well, neither does bathing - that's why we recommend it daily.
- Zig Ziglar
Today is my day to laugh loud - laugh often
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie
Religion often gets in the way of God.
- Bono
Know that the darkest night is often
the bridge to the brightest tomorrow.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie
Often it does not matter so much what we choose,
but that we do choose.
- Alan Cohen
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May the world be kind to you,
and may your own thoughts be gentle upon yourself.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie
All materials & writings are copyright © Jonathan Lockwood Huie, except for quotes and other specifically identified material which belong to their respective copyright holders if applicable.