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Let these funny Enhance Quotes from my large collection of funny quotes about life add a little humor to your day.
The best way to enhance freedom in other lands
is to demonstrate here that our democratic system
is worthy of emulation.
- Jimmy Carter
Alas! how little does the memory
of these human inhabitants
enhance the beauty of the landscape.
- Henry David Thoreau
Grit ruins clam chowder,
but enhances your character.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie
For to be free is not merely to cast off one's chains,
but to live in a way that respects
and enhances the freedom of others.
- Nelson Mandela
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Jesus was all right,
but his disciples were thick and ordinary.
It's them twisting it that ruins it for me.
- John Lennon
A man is a god in ruins.
When men are innocent, life shall be longer,
and shall pass into the immortal,
as gently as we awake from dreams.
- Ralph Waldo Emerson
We're more popular than Jesus now;
I don't know which will go first, rock 'n' roll or Christianity.
- John Lennon
Christianity will go. It will vanish and shrink.
I needn't argue with that; I'm right and I will be proved right.
We're more popular than Jesus now;
I don't know which will go first - rock and roll or Christianity.
- John Lennon
(Jesus on Love)
You have heard that it was said,
"Love your neighbor and hate your enemy."
But I tell you: Love your enemies
and pray for those who persecute you.
- Matthew 5:43-44
You have heard that it was said,
"Love your neighbor and hate your enemy."
But I tell you: Love your enemies and pray for those who persecute you.
- Matthew 5:43-44
"Teacher, which is the greatest commandment in the Law?"
Jesus replied:
"'Love the Lord your God with all your heart
and with all your soul and with all your mind.'
This is the first and greatest commandment.
And the second is like it:
'Love your neighbor as yourself.'
All the Law and the Prophets hang on these two commandments."
- Matthew 22:36-40
Love your enemies, bless them that curse you,
do good to them that hate you, and pray for them
which despitefully use you and persecute you.
- Matthew 5:44
A new command I give you: Love one another.
As I have loved you, so you must love one another.
- Jesus of Nazareth (John 13:34)
Then came Peter to him, and said,
Lord, how oft shall my brother sin against me,
and I forgive him? till seven times?
Jesus saith unto him, I say not unto thee,
Until seven times: but, Until seventy times seven.
- Matthew 18:21-22
(Jesus on Anger and Revenge)
You have heard that it was said,
"Eye for eye, and tooth for tooth."
But I tell you, Do not resist an evil person.
If someone strikes you on the right cheek,
turn to him the other also.
- Matthew 5:38-39
Ask and it will be given to you;
seek and you will find;
knock and the door will be opened to you.
- Matthew 7:7
Everywhere I look, I see the evidence of a creator.
But I don't see it as religion,
which has cut Irish people in two.
I don't see Jesus Christ as being
in any part of a religion.
Religion to me is almost like when God leaves -
and people devise a set of rules to fill the space.
- Bono
Day by day we should weigh what we have
granted to the spirit of the world
against what we have denied to the spirit of Jesus,
in thought and especially in deed.
- Albert Schweitzer
Love Your Enemies
Ye have heard that it hath been said,
Thou shalt love thy neighbor, and hate thine enemy.
But I say unto you, Love your enemies,
bless them that curse you,
do good to them that hate you,
and pray for them which despitefully use you, and persecute you.
- Jesus of Nazareth (Matthew 5:43-44)
Each one of them is Jesus in disguise.
- Mother Teresa
Many people mistake our work for our vocation.
Our vocation is the love of Jesus.
- Mother Teresa
I believe in God, but not as one thing,
not as an old man in the sky.
I believe that what people call God
is something in all of us.
I believe that what Jesus and Mohammed and Buddha
and all the rest said was right.
It's just that the translations have gone wrong.
- John Lennon
Jesus preached more and taught more
about helping the poor and the sick and the hungry
than he did about heaven and hell.
Shouldn't that tell us something?
- John Grisham
Love your enemies.
- Jesus (Matthew 5:44)
Love one another.
- Jesus of Nazareth
Jesus said: "A man was going down from Jerusalem to Jericho,
when he fell into the hands of robbers.
They stripped him of his clothes, beat him
and went away, leaving him half dead.
A priest happened to be going down the same road,
and when he saw the man, he passed by on the other side.
So too, a Levite [religious leader],
when he came to the place and saw him,
passed by on the other side.
But a Samaritan [Samaritans and Jews generally disliked
and were suspicious of each other] came where the man was;
and when he saw him, he took pity on him.
He went to him and bandaged his wounds ... and ...
took him to an inn and took care of him. ...
Jesus [said] "Go and do likewise."
- Luke 10:25-37 (The Parable of the Good Samaritan)
If love is blind, why is lingerie so popular?
- Anonymous
No written law has ever been more binding
than unwritten custom supported by popular opinion.
- Carrie Chapman Catt
Everything popular is wrong.
- Oscar Wilde
Cowardice asks the question - is it safe?
Expediency asks the question - is it politic?
Vanity asks the question - is it popular?
But conscience asks the question - is it right?
And there comes a time when one must take a position
that is neither safe, nor politic, nor popular;
but one must take it BECAUSE it is right.
- Dr. Martin Luther King, Jr.
Love conquers all things except poverty and a toothache.
- Mae West
Love is an irresistible desire
to be irresistibly desired.
- Robert Frost
The first sigh of love is the last breath of wisdom.
- Anonymous
I love being married.
It's so great to find that one special person
you want to annoy for the rest of your life.
- Rita Rudner
Love is like war: easy to begin but very hard to stop.
- H. L. Mencken
Gravitation is not responsible for people falling in love.
- Albert Einstein
Men always want to be a woman's first love -
women like to be a man's last romance.
- Oscar Wilde
In order to be happy with a man,
you must understand him a lot and love him a little.
To be happy with a woman, you must love her a lot
and not try to understand her at all.
- Helen Rowland
Love is the triumph of imagination over intelligence.
- H. L. Mencken
Love is the delusion that one woman differs from another.
- H. L. Mencken
Nothing takes the taste out of peanut butter
quite like unrequited love.
- Charlie Brown in Charles M. Schulz' Peanuts comic
Love is like an hourglass,
with the heart filling up as the brain empties.
- Jules Renard
A honeymoon should be like a table:
four bare legs and no drawers.
- Anonymous
Love is loving what your lover loves.
- Anonymous
Love looks through a telescope;
envy, through a microscope.
- Josh Billings
Love is what makes two people
sit in the middle of a park bench
when there is plenty of room at both ends.
- Anonymous
Save a boyfriend for a rainy day -
and another, in case it doesn't rain.
- Mae West
I'd like to kiss ya, but I just washed ma hair.
- the movie The Cabin in the Cotton
True love is like ghosts,
which everyone talks about and few have seen.
- Francois de La Rochefoucauld
Love thy neighbor -
and if he happens to be tall,
debonair and devastating,
it will be that much easier.
- Mae West
My boyfriend and I broke up.
He wanted to get married and I didn't want him to.
- Rita Rudner
The only true love is love at first sight;
second sight dispels it.
- Israel Zangwill
True love comes quietly,
without banners or flashing lights.
If you hear bells, get your ears checked.
- Erich Segal
Ever has it been that love knows not its own depth
until the hour of separation.
- Khalil Gibran
Oh, come on, Shrek, wake up and smell the pheromones!
- the movie Shrek (2001)
Love is metaphysical gravity.
- R. Buckminster Fuller
Love is only a dirty trick played on us
to achieve continuation of the species.
- W. Somerset Maugham
Love is a grave mental disease.
- Plato
A relationship, I think, is like a shark.
You know? It has to constantly move forward or it dies.
And I think what we got on our hands is a dead shark.
- the Woody Allen movie Annie Hall (1977)
My wife ran off with my best friend, and I sure do miss him.
- Anonymous
When you are courting a nice girl
an hour seems like a second.
When you sit on a red-hot cinder
a second seems like an hour.
That's relativity.
- Albert Einstein
The Wedding March always reminds me of the music
played when soldiers go into battle.
- Heinrich Heine
I love to shop after a bad relationship.
I don't know. I buy a new outfit
and it makes me feel better. It just does.
Sometimes I see a really great outfit,
I'll break up with someone on purpose.
- Rita Rudner
The feeling of friendship is like that
of being comfortably filled with roast beef;
love, like being enlivened with champagne.
- Samuel Johnson
One's first love is always perfect
until one meets one's second love.
- Elizabeth Aston
Women marry men hoping they will change.
Men marry women hoping they will not.
- Albert Einstein
A woman in love can't be reasonable -
or she probably wouldn't be in love.
- Mae West
Hate is never conquered by hate,
Hate is only conquered by love.
- The Buddha
Getting divorced just because you don't love a man
is almost as silly as getting married just because you do.
- Zsa Zsa Gabor
A big part of letting go is recognizing
when it is time to stay in a situation
and when it is time to move on.
- Darren L. Johnson
If (s)he's an apple and you're an orange,
celebrate your differences -
make a great fruit salad.
Love isn't about being the same -
it's about being sweet with each other.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie
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May the world be kind to you,
and may your own thoughts be gentle upon yourself.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie
All materials & writings are copyright © Jonathan Lockwood Huie, except for quotes and other specifically identified material which belong to their respective copyright holders if applicable.