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Funny Duties Quotes
Funny Quotes about Duties

Let these funny Duties Quotes from my large collection of funny quotes about life add a little humor to your day.

Faithfulness in the performance of small duties
gives us strength to adhere to difficult determinations
that life will someday force us to make.
- Paramahansa Yogananda

The interests of a nation, when well understood,
will be found to coincide with their moral duties.
- Thomas Jefferson

I think it's the duty of the comedian to find out
where the line is drawn and cross it deliberately.
- George Carlin

When a stupid man is doing something he is ashamed of,
he always declares that it's his duty.
- George Bernard Shaw


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Infinite striving to be the best is man's duty;
it is its own reward.
Everything else is in God's hands.
- Mohandas (Mahatma) Gandhi

I long to accomplish a great and noble task,
but it is my chief duty to accomplish small tasks
as if they were great and noble.
- Helen Keller

BERLIN: PROCLAMATION TO THE GERMAN NATION FEBRUARY 1, 1933
The National Government will regard it as its first and foremost duty
to revive in the nation the spirit of unity and co-operation.
It will preserve and defend those basic principles
on which our nation has been built.
It regards Christianity as the foundation of our national morality,
and the family as the basis of national life....
- Adolf Hitler


 

No duty the Executive had to perform was so trying
as to put the right man in the right place.
- Thomas Jefferson

Love is a better teacher than duty.
- Albert Einstein

All the great things are simple,
and many can be expressed in a single word:
freedom, justice, honor, duty, mercy, hope.
- Winston Churchill

Only aim to do your duty,
and mankind will give you credit where you fail.
- Thomas Jefferson

You cannot divorce religious belief and public service.
I've never detected any conflict between
God's will and my political duty.
If you violate one, you violate the other.
- Jimmy Carter

If co-operation is a duty, I hold that non-co-operation
also under certain conditions is equally a duty.
- Mohandas (Mahatma) Gandhi

Non-cooperation with evil is as much a duty as is cooperation with good.
- Mohandas (Mahatma) Gandhi

Rights that do not flow from duty
well performed are not worth having.
- Mohandas (Mahatma) Gandhi

Let's have faith that right makes might;
and in that faith let us, to the end,
dare to do our duty as we understand it.
- Abraham Lincoln

No duty is more urgent than that of returning thanks.
- James Allen

To keep the body in good health is a duty...
otherwise we shall not be able
to keep our mind strong and clear.
- The Buddha

It is our duty still to endeavor to avoid war;
but if it shall actually take place, no matter by whom brought on,
we must defend ourselves.
If our house be on fire, without inquiring whether
it was fired from within or without,
we must try to extinguish it.
- Thomas Jefferson

Service to others is only noble when is is a choice
- a free-will gift.
Anything done out of a sense of obligation
or responsibility or duty becomes a burden
rather than a spiritual empowerment.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie

It is better to do one's own duty,
however defective it may be,
than to follow the duty of another,
however well one may perform it.
He who does his duty as
his own nature reveals it, never sins.
- Lao Tzu

If the Great Way perishes, there will be morality and duty.
When cleverness and knowledge arise, great lies will flourish.
When relatives fall out with one another,
there will be filial duty and love.
When states are in confusion there will be faithful servants.
- Lao Tzu

The essence of all religions is One.
Surrender is the main duty of everyone.
Surrender means the feeling of oneness,
I and God are One. Why?
The reason is that the One
who is present in you is present in me.
- Sri Sathya Sai Baba

What if we like our outrageous side best?
We "know" that the "right" thing to do is to suck it up,
put the costume and the happy face back in storage for another year,
re-dress in our frown and gray flannel suit,
and trudge back to job, chores, "responsibilities," and "duty."
Stop! Maybe TODAY is the day to put the frown and gray flannel
into that dusty storage locker, and start to LIVE.
Not just today, but EVERY DAY for the rest of your life!
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie

Religion is the masterpiece of the art of animal training,
for it trains people as to how they should think.
- Arthur Schopenhauer

A relationship, I think, is like a shark.
You know? It has to constantly move forward or it dies.
And I think what we got on our hands is a dead shark.
- the Woody Allen movie Annie Hall (1977)

The key is, to not think of death as an end,
but as more of a very effective way to cut down on your expenses.
- the movie Love and Death

I read that you should never go out with someone
if you can think of three reasons why you shouldn't.
- the movie Bridget Jones: The Edge of Reason (2004)

I think you're the opposite of a paranoid.
I think you go around with the insane delusion that people like you.
- the Woody Allen movie Deconstructing Harry

Whenever I date a guy, I think,
"Is this the man I want my children
to spend their weekends with?"
- Rita Rudner

She's been diagnosed as a paranoid hypochondriac.
Doctors think she may be faking.
- the movie Dead Men Don't Wear Plaid

What we think, we become.
All that we are arises with our thoughts.
With our thoughts, we make the world.
- The Buddha

No one can have a higher opinion of you than I have,
and I think you're a slimy, contemptible sewer rat!
- the movie The Great Mouse Detective

I personally think we developed language
because of our deep need to complain.
- Lily Tomlin

If the facts don't fit the theory,
change the facts.
- Albert Einstein

You can lead a man to Congress,
but you can't make him think.
- Milton Berle

The objection to Puritans is not that
they try to make us think as they do,
but that they try to make us do as they think.
- H. L. Mencken

If you can't annoy somebody with what you write,
I think there's little point in writing.
- Kingsley Amis

Really I feel less keen about the Army every day.
I think the Church would suit me better.
- Winston Churchill

People who think they know everything
are a great annoyance to those of us who do.
- Isaac Asimov

I don't think the intelligence reports are all that hot.
Some days I get more out of the New York Times.
- John F. Kennedy

The third certainty of life, after death and taxes,
is that nothing will work out the way you want.
Life is fully as bad as you think it is.
Choose to live joyfully anyway.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie

Always speak the truth,
think before you speak,
and write it down afterwards.
- Lewis Carroll

Anyone who thinks sitting in church
can make you a Christian must also think
that sitting in a garage can make you a car.
- Garrison Keillor

For those who do not think,
it is best at least to rearrange
their prejudices once in a while.
- Luther Burbank

What do I think of Western civilization?
I think it would be a very good idea.
- Mohandas (Mahatma) Gandhi

Jealousy is all the fun you think they had.
- Erica Jong

You can always do one thing less than you think you can.
- Anonymous

Human beings are the only creatures on the planet
who tell time and think they have to earn a living.
- Buckminster Fuller

If it turns out that there IS a God,
I don't think that he's evil.
I think that the worst you can say about him
is that basically he's an underachiever.
- the movie Love and Death

Did you ever stop to think, and forget to start again?
- A. A. Milne (Winnie-The-Pooh)

I think men who have a pierced ear
are better prepared for marriage.
They've experienced pain and bought jewelry.
- Rita Rudner

Think of how stupid the average person is,
and realize half of them are stupider than that.
- George Carlin

In life you are given two ends;
one to think with and the other to sit on.
Your success in life depends on which end you use most.
Heads you win, tails you lose.
- Conrad Burns

I think that there is nothing, not even crime,
more opposed to poetry, to philosophy, ay, to life itself
than this incessant business.
- Henry David Thoreau

When all think alike, no one is thinking very much.
- Walter Lippmann

I don't like to think of laws
as rules you have to follow,
but more as suggestions.
- George Carlin

The most pathetic person in the world
is someone who has sight, but has no vision.
- Helen Keller

No written law has ever been more binding
than unwritten custom supported by popular opinion.
- Carrie Chapman Catt

It isn't what you have, or who you are, or where you are,
or what you are doing that makes you happy or unhappy.
It is what you think about.
- Dale Carnegie

Our society is run by insane people for insane objectives.
I think we're being run by maniacs for maniacal ends
and I think I'm liable to be put away as insane for expressing that.
That's what's insane about it.
- John Lennon

To know yet to think that one does not know is best;
Not to know yet to think that one knows
will lead to difficulty.
- Lao Tzu

Life does not consist mainly,
or even largely, of facts or happenings.
It consist mainly of the storm of thoughts
that is forever flowing through one's head.
- Mark Twain

You know that place between sleeping and awake,
that place where you can still remember dreaming?
That's where I'll always think of you.
- James M. Barrie

Anyone who knows history, particularly
the history of Europe, will, I think,
recognize that the domination
of education or of government
by any one particular religious faith
is never a happy arrangement for the people.
- Eleanor Roosevelt

The important thing is not to stop questioning.
Curiosity has its own reason for existing.
- Albert Einstein

The function of education is to teach one
to think intensively and to think critically.
Intelligence plus character - that is the goal of true education.
- Martin Luther King, Jr.

I don't think of all the misery
but of the beauty that still remains.
- Anne Frank

Tolerance is the first principle of community;
it is the spirit which conserves
the best that all men think.
- Helen Keller

People should think things out fresh
and not just accept conventional terms
and the conventional way of doing things.
- R. Buckminster Fuller

I used to go away for weeks in a state of confusion.
- Albert Einstein


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May the world be kind to you,
and may your own thoughts be gentle upon yourself.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie


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