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Funny Quotes about Life
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Funny Drowning Quotes
Funny Quotes about Drowning

Let these funny Drowning Quotes from my large collection of funny quotes about life add a little humor to your day.

When you're drowning, you don't say,
"I would be incredibly pleased if someone
would have the foresight to notice
me drowning and come and help me,"
you just scream.
- John Lennon

Anxiety is love's greatest killer.
It makes one feel as you might
when a drowning man holds unto you.
You want to save him, but you know
he will strangle you with his panic.
- Anais Nin

I have often wanted to drown my troubles,
but I can't get my wife to go swimming.
- Anonymous

Don't be trapped by dogma -
which is living with the results of other people's thinking.
Don't let the noise of other's opinions
drown out your own inner voice.
- Steve Jobs


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The River of Life has no judgments.
The River flows with no concept of good and bad - right and wrong.
The fields and dreams of men may be nourished by the River of Life,
or flooded and covered with silt, and the River just flows.
Men may catch fish and live on the River of Life,
or they may founder in a storm and drown, and the River just flows.
The River of Life is timeless.
It is not unchanging, but it is timeless,
and it changes in its own time.
The River of Life knows no obstacles.
The River can cut through solid rock - in its own time.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie

Your time is limited, so don't waste it living someone else's life.
Don't be trapped by dogma -
which is living with the results of other people's thinking.
Don't let the noise of others' opinions
drown out your own inner voice.
And most important, have the courage
to follow your heart and intuition.
They somehow already know what you truly want to become.
Everything else is secondary.
- Steve Jobs

Steve Jobs' Three Rules of Life ...
1. Your time is limited, so don't waste it living someone else's life.
2. Don't be trapped by dogma -
which is living with the results of other people's thinking.
Don't let the noise of other's opinions drown out your own inner voice.
3. Have the courage to follow your heart and intuition -
they somehow already know what you truly want to become.
- Steve Jobs


 

People say conversation is a lost art;
how often I have wished it were.
- Edward R. Murrow

In the course of my life, I have often had to eat my words,
and I must confess that I have always found it a wholesome diet.
- Winston Churchill

Money often costs too much.
- Ralph Waldo Emerson

Do not laugh much or often or unrestrainedly.
- Epictetus

Too often we... enjoy the comfort of opinion
without the discomfort of thought.
- John F. Kennedy

Rules are mostly made to be broken
and are too often for the lazy to hide behind.
- Douglas MacArthur

If you refuse to accept anything but the best,
you very often get it.
- Somerset Maugham

Happiness is often the result of being too busy to be miserable.
- Anonymous

The worst government is often the most moral.
One composed of cynics is often very tolerant and humane.
But when fanatics are on top there is no limit to oppression.
- H. L. Mencken

Too often the strong, silent man is silent only because
he does not know what to say, and is reputed strong
only because he has remained silent.
- Winston Churchill

One of the annoying things about believing in free will
and individual responsibility is the difficulty
of finding somebody to blame your problems on.
And when you do find somebody, it's remarkable
how often his picture turns up on your driver's license.
- P. J. O'Rourke

Worry often gives a small thing a big shadow.
- Swedish Proverb

The price of freedom for a nation is lives and money.
Often, the price of freedom for an individual
is challenging the closed minds of family and friend.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie

Today is your day to laugh at life,
laugh at what's funny - laugh at what's sad,
laugh loud - laugh often,
laugh at me - laugh at you - laugh at life.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie

The darkest night is often the bridge to the brightest tomorrow.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie

Often the hands will solve a mystery
that the intellect has struggled with in vain.
- Carl Jung

It is often easier to ask for forgiveness
than to ask for permission.
- Grace Hopper

Mostly, it is human to dislike surprises -
often with great intensity.
Be open to new ways;
sometimes newness just knocks on our door;
welcome it.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie

To laugh often and much;
to win the respect of intelligent people
and the affection of children,
to leave the world a better place,
to know even one life has breathed easier
because you have lived,
this is to have succeeded.
- Ralph Waldo Emerson

Avoiding danger is no safer
in the long run than outright exposure.
The fearful are caught as often as the bold.
- Helen Keller

Intense feeling too often obscures the truth.
- Harry S. Truman

Indifference and neglect often
do much more damage than outright dislike.
- J. K. Rowling

Live Well, Love Much, Laugh Often.
- Anonymous

In time we hate that which we often fear.
- William Shakespeare

Live boldly. Laugh Loudly. Love Truly.
Play as often as you can
Work as smart as you are able.
Share your heart as deeply as you can reach.
- Mary Anne Radmacher

It's a funny thing about life;
if you refuse to accept anything but the best,
you very often get it.
- W. Somerset Maugham

It is better to light a candle than to curse the darkness.
- Chinese proverb often quoted by Eleanor Roosevelt

Know the best and highest choices for health
and more often choose those things.
- Mary Anne Radmacher

From the deepest desires often come the deadliest hate.
- Socrates

No man stands so tall as when he stoops to help a child.
- Anonymous (often attributed to Abraham Lincoln)

Today is my day to laugh loud - laugh often
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie

Jealousy is a disease, love is a healthy condition.
The immature mind often mistakes one for the other,
or assumes that the greater the love, the greater the jealousy -
in fact, they're almost incompatible;
one emotion hardly leaves room for the other.
Both at once can produce unbearable turmoil.
- Robert Heinlein

Friendship often leads to love,
but lust seldom leads to friendship.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie

The great enemy of the truth is very often not the lie,
deliberate, contrived and dishonest,
but the myth, persistent, persuasive and unrealistic.
- John F. Kennedy

I've learned that mistakes can often be
as good a teacher as success.
- Jack Welch

Often, the greatest joy is to be found not in new things,
but in old things seen through new eyes.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie

How often I found where I should be going
only by setting out for somewhere else.
- R. Buckminster Fuller

By not caring too much about what people think,
I'm able to think for myself
and propagate ideas which are very often unpopular.
And I succeed.
- Albert Ellis

Know that the darkest night is often
the bridge to the brightest tomorrow.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie

I think wholeness is God's design for us;
and that often amounts to embracing contradictions.
- Bono

A widespread belief is more often likely
to be foolish than sensible.
- Bertrand Russell

Great talents are the most lovely
and often the most dangerous
fruits on the tree of humanity.
They hang upon the most slender twigs
that are easily snapped off.
- Carl Jung

Each of us is burdened by an unlimited number of
expectations (demands) that we hold for the actions of others.
We "know" that there is a right way to do things,
and are often outraged when our expectations are not met.
Usually, we are unaware that we merely
have a strong opinion and point-of-view,
and are sure that we know how everything is supposed to be.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie

Small opportunities are often
the beginning of great enterprises.
- Demosthenes

The willow which bends to the tempest,
often escapes better than the oak which resists it;
and so in great calamities,
it sometimes happens that light and frivolous spirits
recover their elasticity and presence of mind sooner
than those of a loftier character.
- Albert Schweitzer

Honest disagreement is often a good sign of progress.
- Mohandas (Mahatma) Gandhi

When one door closes, another opens.
But often we look so long, so regretfully,
upon the closed door,
that we fail to see the one that is opened for us.
- Helen Keller

People are often unreasonable, illogical, and self-centered; ...
Forgive them anyway.
- Kent Keith
(often attributed to Mother Teresa, who kept a copy
on the wall of her orphanage)

When trouble arises and things look bad,
there is always one individual who perceives a solution
and is willing to take command.
Very often, that individual is crazy.
- Dave Barry

Just because it's true, I say as often as I can
in as many ways as I can form, "I sure love you."
- Mary Anne Radmacher

The best cure for our own self-inflicted suffering
is often service to others.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie

Success often grows best in the fertile soil of failure.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie

The courage of life is often a less dramatic spectacle
than the courage of a final moment;
but it is no less a magnificent mixture of triumph and tragedy.
- John F. Kennedy

What we call the beginning is often the end.
And to make an end is to make a beginning.
The end is where we start from.
- T. S. Eliot

What people often mean by getting rid of conflict
is getting rid of diversity,
and it is of the utmost importance
that these should not be considered the same.
- M. P. Follett

All that glisters is not gold;
Often have you heard that told.
Many a man his life hath sold
but my outside to behold.
Gilded tombs do worms enfold.
- William Shakespeare

I often regret that I have spoken;
never that I have been silent.
- Publilius Syrus

Action speaks louder than words but not nearly as often.
- Mark Twain

Books can only reveal us to ourselves,
and as often as they do us this service we lay them aside.
- Henry David Thoreau

Laugh Loud - Laugh Often
Laugh At What's Funny - Laugh At What's Sad
Laugh At Me - Laugh At You - Laugh At Life
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie

Religion often gets in the way of God.
- Bono

Success is often the result of taking
a misstep in the right direction.
- Al Bernstein

Play as often as you can.
- Mary Anne Radmacher

Stand often in the company of dreamers.
They believe you can achieve impossible things.
- Mary Anne Radmacher


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May the world be kind to you,
and may your own thoughts be gentle upon yourself.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie


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