Enter one or two keywords to search these Funny Quotes.

Hint: keep it simple, like life twain



Facebook share   Tweet This   Email this

Funny Quotes about Life
Funny Quotes about Life | Funny Love Quotes | Links | About
Search:   A-   B-   Ca-   Co-   D-   E-   F-   G-   H-    I-    J-K-L   M-   N-O   Pa-   Pr-   Q-R   Sa-   Sk-   T-   U-V-W-X-Y-Z


Get a Humorous, Yet Insightful, Quote of the Day each day by email.
Follow funny-quotes-life.com by Email:


Funny Drink Quotes
Funny Quotes about Drink

Let these funny Drink Quotes from my large collection of funny quotes about life add a little humor to your day.

She drove me to drink.
That's the one thing I'm indebted to her for.
- the movie Never Give a Sucker an Even Break

I was so jazzed about sobering up
and starting a new life;
I had to stop at a bar
to get a drink just to calm down.
- the television series Glee

A new friend is like new wine;
when it has aged you will drink it with pleasure.
- Ecclesiastes 9:10

Worthless people live only to eat and drink;
people of worth eat and drink only to live.
- Socrates


Get a Funny Quote of the Day each day by email or in your feed reader.

 Subscribe in a reader -- or
Enter your email address:




Delivered by FeedBurner


From the way most people live,
one would never guess that humans are beings of free will.
Repetition can be a choice, but often it isn't.
The athlete or pianist who practices the same routine
day after day, year after year, has their eye on a goal.
The unending repetition is a conscious choice
in the pursuit of a life dream.
But what about the sameness of most lives?
Observe the morning commute, the after-work drink,
the Sunday football game or religious service -
how many of those people are consciously following their dream,
training their mind, body, and spirit through that daily repetition?
And how many are mindlessly slogging through each day
out of habit and boredom?
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie

Your pain is the breaking of the shell
that encloses your understanding.
Much of your pain is self-chosen.
It is the bitter potion by which the
physician within you heals your sick self.
Therefore trust the physician, and drink
his remedy in silence and tranquility.
- Khalil Gibran

A man is a fool if he drinks before he reaches the age of 50,
and a fool if he doesn't afterward.
- Frank Lloyd Wright


 

Work is the curse of the drinking classes.
- Oscar Wilde

My rule of life prescribed as an absolutely sacred rite
smoking cigars and also the drinking of alcohol
before, after and if need be during all meals
and in the intervals between them.
- Winston Churchill

I have been brought up and trained to have
the utmost contempt for people who get drunk.
- Winston Churchill

Why does a woman work ten years to change a man's habits
and then complain that he's not the man she married?
- Barbra Streisand

Hard work never killed anybody, but why take a chance?
- Edgar Bergen

As a cure for worrying,
work is better than whiskey.
- Ralph Waldo Emerson

There are two kinds of people,
those who do the work,
and those who take the credit.
Try to be in the first group;
there is less competition there.
- Indira Gandhi

If a man smiles all the time,
he's probably selling something that doesn't work.
- George Carlin

The third certainty of life, after death and taxes,
is that nothing will work out the way you want.
Life is fully as bad as you think it is.
Choose to live joyfully anyway.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie

Most of what we call management consists of
making it difficult for people to get their work done.
- Peter F. Drucker

Anyone can do any amount of work
provided it isn't the work
he is supposed to be doing at the moment.
- Robert Benchley

As we work to create light for others,
we naturally light our own way.
- Mary Anne Radmacher

Better learn balance. Balance is key.
Balance good, karate good. Everything good.
Balance bad, better pack up, go home. Understand?
- Miyagi: character in the movie Karate Kid

The Ought-To Need-To Tango:
I am racked with the guilt and the pain of I should,
and I ought, and I can't, but I must.
I can't rest; I can't sleep; I'm just not understood,
and I hate that the world is unjust.
I have work; I have woes; I have troubles for life;
but I don't have a ME that I trust.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie

Capitalism tries for a delicate balance:
It attempts to work things out so that
everyone gets just enough stuff to keep them from
getting violent and trying to take other people's stuff.
- George Carlin

A time for work, a time for play -
balance in all things.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie

If you want to make peace with your enemy,
you have to work with your enemy.
Then he becomes your partner.
- Nelson Mandela

It is not work that kills men; it is worry.
Worry is rust upon the blade.
- Henry Ward Beecher

Whatever your life's work is, do it well.
- Martin Luther King, Jr.

If you run into a wall, don't turn around and give up.
Figure out how to climb it, go through it, or work around it.
- Michael Jordan

All work and no play makes Jack a dull boy.
- Proverb

Live boldly. Laugh Loudly. Love Truly.
Play as often as you can
Work as smart as you are able.
Share your heart as deeply as you can reach.
- Mary Anne Radmacher

It's work only if I say it's work,
but it's play if I say it's fun.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie

One machine can do the work of fifty ordinary men.
No machine can do the work of one extraordinary man.
- Elbert Hubbard

We are free only if we face the challenge of freedom,
do the work of freedom, fight the fight of freedom
and die the death for freedom.
- Charles G. Adams

I have found out that though the ways in which
I can make myself useful are few,
yet the work open to me is endless.
- Helen Keller

Dare to dream of your great success.
Become intimate with those things
which deeply motivate you
and regularly work toward
the realization of that mission.
- Mary Anne Radmacher

Live your life, do your work, then take your hat.
- Henry David Thoreau

The WORK
1.Is it true?
2.Can you absolutely know that it's true?
3.How do you react when you think that thought?
4.Who would you be without the thought?
- Byron Katie

Work like you don't need the money.
Love like you've never been hurt.
Dance like nobody's watching.
- Satchel Paige

Choose a job you love,
and you will never have to work a day in your life.
- Confucius

You are never given a wish without also
being given the power to make it true.
You may have to work for it, however.
- Richard Bach

Work as smart as you are able.
- Mary Anne Radmacher

Everyone enjoys doing the kind of work
for which he is best suited.
- Napoleon Hill

The harder I work, the luckier I get.
- Samuel Goldwyn

We work with the people not out of pity
but out of respect for their potential for growth and development,
both as individuals and as communities.
- Jimmy Yen

The difference between work and play lies 100%
in the attitude of the participant.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie

Wishing to be friends is quick work,
but friendship is a slow ripening fruit.
- Aristotle

Hard work pays off.
- Anonymous

If you have built castles in the air,
your work need not be lost;
that is where they should be.
Now put foundations under them.
- Henry David Thoreau

When love and skill work together, expect a masterpiece.
- John Ruskin

Some people dream of success
while others wake up and work hard at it.
- Anonymous

Life grants nothing to us mortals without hard work.
- Horace

Men of lofty genius,
when they are doing the least work,
are most active.
- Leonardo da Vinci

Breaking up is a natural evolution
when you try to figure out what you want in life.
If you're with an individual
who isn't moving in the same direction
and at the same rate that you are,
it ain't going to work.
- Usher Raymond

I find that the harder I work,
the more luck I seem to have.
- Thomas Jefferson

Whatever your work and whatever its worth,
No matter how strong or clever,
Some one will sneer if you pause to hear,
And scoff at your best endeavor.
For the target art has a broad expanse,
And wherever you chance to hit it,
Though close be your aim to the bull's-eye fame,
There are those who will never admit it.
- Ella Wheeler Wilcox

There are no secrets to success.
It is the result of preparation,
hard work, and learning from failure.
- Colin Powell

The trick is in what one emphasizes.
We either make ourselves miserable,
or we make ourselves happy.
The amount of work is the same.
- Carlos Castaneda

Have convictions. Be friendly.
Stick to your beliefs as they stick to theirs.
Work as hard as they do.
- Eleanor Roosevelt

There is no substitute for hard work.
- Thomas Edison

What a book a devil's chaplain might write
on the clumsy, wasteful, blundering, low,
and horribly cruel work of nature!
- Charles Darwin

I learned the value of hard work by working hard.
- Margaret Mead

There is joy in work.
There is no happiness except in the realization
that we have accomplished something.
- Henry Ford

My experience has been that work is
almost the best way to pull oneself out of the depths.
- Eleanor Roosevelt

When was the last time you took
a different route to work ... just because?
Consider shaking up your life a little (or a lot) ...
for no reason, except to do it.
Let your life be an adventure.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie

Far and away the best prize that life has to offer
is the chance to work hard at work worth doing.
- Theodore Roosevelt

Work out your own salvation.
Do not depend on others.
- The Buddha

Profit is a by-product of work;
happiness is its chief product.
- Henry Ford

The only place success comes before work is in the dictionary.
- Vince Lombardi

I do not wish to treat friendships daintily,
but with roughest courage.
When they are real, they are
not glass threads or frost-work,
but the solidest thing we know.
- Ralph Waldo Emerson

Leaders aren't born they are made.
And they are made just like anything else, through hard work.
And that's the price we'll have to pay
to achieve that goal, or any goal.
- Vince Lombardi

Football is like life - it requires perseverance,
self-denial, hard work, sacrifice,
dedication and respect for authority.
- Vince Lombardi

The Tao of the sage is work without effort.
Practice non-action. Work without doing.
- Lao Tzu


Thank you for visiting: Funny Drink Quotes - Funny Quotes about Drink.

Please sign up on the form below to receive
my Free Daily Inspiration - Daily Quotes email.

You can also search my large collection of Funny Quotes.

May the world be kind to you,
and may your own thoughts be gentle upon yourself.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie


Funny Quotes

 


All materials & writings are copyright © Jonathan Lockwood Huie, except for quotes and other specifically identified material which belong to their respective copyright holders if applicable.