Facebook share Tweet This Email this
Let these funny Door Quotes from my large collection of funny quotes about life add a little humor to your day.
Every wall is a door.
- Ralph Waldo Emerson
I was the kid next door's imaginary friend.
- Emo Phillips
We make our friends; we make our enemies;
but God makes our next-door neighbor.
- Gilbert (G. K.) Chesterton
Stress is always waiting
just outside your door
like a vicious wild-dog.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie
Get a Funny Quote of the Day each day by email or in your feed reader.
Make a conscious choice to live
a serene and stress-free life.
Stress is always waiting just outside your door
like a vicious wild-dog.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie
Mostly, it is human to dislike surprises -
often with great intensity.
Be open to new ways;
sometimes newness just knocks on our door;
welcome it.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie
If a man can... make a better mousetrap,
the world will make a beaten path to his door.
- Ralph Waldo Emerson
Reality is a sliding door.
- Ralph Waldo Emerson
Education is the key to unlock the golden door of freedom.
- George Washington Carver
Sometimes the things you really want
sneak in the back door.
Notice.
- Mary Anne Radmacher
If you shut the door to all errors,
truth will be shut out.
- Rabindranath Tagore
Build a better mousetrap
and the world will beat a path to your door.
- Ralph Waldo Emerson
When God closes a door, he opens a window.
- Anonymous
Knowledge of what is, does not open
the door directly to what should be.
- Albert Einstein
When one door closes, another opens.
But often we look so long, so regretfully,
upon the closed door,
that we fail to see the one that is opened for us.
- Helen Keller
I want you to be concerned about your next door neighbor.
Do you know your next door neighbor?
- Mother Teresa
Forgiveness is unlocking the door to set someone free
and realizing you were the prisoner!
- Max Lucado
God enters by a private door into each individual.
- Ralph Waldo Emerson
When you follow your bliss... doors will open
where you would not have thought there would be doors,
and where there wouldn't be a door for anyone else.
- Joseph Campbell
If opportunity doesn't knock, build a door.
- Milton Berle
He who wants to do good knocks at the gate:
he who loves finds the door open.
- Rabindranath Tagore
I have become my own version of an optimist.
If I can't make it through one door,
I'll go through another door - or I'll make a door.
Something terrific will come no matter how dark the present.
- Rabindranath Tagore
If the mind wants to comprehend reality,
it will have to come out of the past and the future.
But coming out of the past and the future,
it is no longer the mind at all.
Hence the insistence of all the great masters of the world
that the door to reality is no-mind.
- Osho
It is for us to pray not for tasks equal to our powers,
but for powers equal to our tasks,
to go forward with a great desire forever beating at the door
of our hearts as we travel toward our distant goal.
- Helen Keller
If you have been divorced, you know it hurts -
especially if your marriage had lasted many years.
Whatever the circumstances of your relationship,
and whatever the nature of its ending,
there is always grief and regret -
perhaps regret over the ending,
or perhaps regret over not ending the relationship sooner -
or perhaps both.
Nonetheless, move past the grief and regret.
No matter how painful, divorce, like all endings,
opens the door to new beginnings.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie
I feel the same way about solitude as some people
feel about the blessing of the church.
It's the light of grace for me.
I never close my door behind me without the awareness
that I am carrying out an act of mercy toward myself.
- Peter Hoeg
Ask and it will be given to you;
seek and you will find;
knock and the door will be opened to you.
- Matthew 7:7
Today, like every other day, we wake up empty
and frightened. Don't open the door to the study
and begin reading. Take down a musical instrument.
Let the beauty we love be what we do.
There are hundreds of ways to kneel and kiss the ground.
- Rumi (Persian poet 1207-1273)
Give me your tired, your poor,
Your huddled masses yearning to breathe free,
The wretched refuse of your teeming shore.
Send these, the homeless, tempest-tost to me,
I lift my lamp beside the golden door!
- inscribed on the Statue of Liberty in New York harbor
Home is our sanctuary, where we:
relax into being ourselves,
play with our inner child,
paint the walls green and pink,
dig in the dirt,
grow something,
love somebody else,
love ourselves even more,
snuggle with a warm blanket on a Sunday afternoon,
hang "go away" on the door whenever we want,
clean and tidy often... or never,
launch from and return to,
are truly ourselves.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie
It's YOUR time - it's YOUR life -
YOU get to choose how you use it. T
here is no way that your life is "supposed" to be.
Your parents had their vision for your life.
Your boss, your spouse, your church, your friends,
and even the family next door have their ideas
of how you should live your life.
What about YOUR vision for your life?
What do YOU want?
YES, it matters what you want.
YES you can have what you want.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie
I recognize this in my writing process.
A consistent writing structure opens the door to amazing insights.
I recognize the truth of this in my daily habits.
When I set my keys in the place
I, with practice, always set my keys...
I do not lose them.
In many instances an ordered external structure
can be an invitation for an extraordinarily unfettered,
creative and unbounded inner structure.
- Mary Anne Radmacher
When you follow your bliss,
doors will open for you
that wouldn't have opened for anyone else.
- Joseph Campbell
We keep moving forward, opening new doors,
and doing new things, because we're curious
and curiosity keeps leading us down new paths.
- Walt Disney
When you have shut your doors, and darkened your room,
remember, never to say that you are alone,
for you are not alone, but God is within,
and your genius is within.
- Epictetus
The doors we open and close each day decide the lives we live.
- Flora Whittemore
It is difficult for the common good to prevail
against the intense concentration
of those who have a special interest,
especially if the decisions are made behind locked doors.
- Jimmy Carter
Stay Alert, and doors will open.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie
Follow your bliss and doors will open
where there were no doors before.
- Joseph Campbell
Be an opener of doors for such as come after thee.
- Ralph Waldo Emerson
Our defense is in the preservation of the spirit
which prizes liberty as a heritage of all men,
in all lands, everywhere.
Destroy this spirit and you have planted
the seeds of despotism around your own doors.
- Abraham Lincoln
If a friend of mine gave a feast, and did not invite me to it,
I should not mind a bit.
but if a friend of mine had a sorrow
and refused to allow me to share it,
I should feel it most bitterly.
If he shut the doors of the house of mourning against me,
I would move back again and again and beg to be admitted
so that I might share in what I was entitled to share.
If he thought me unworthy, unfit to weep with him,
I should feel it as the most poignant humiliation.
- Oscar Wilde
When you follow your bliss, you put yourself on a kind of track
that has been there all the while waiting for you,
and the life you ought to be living is the one you are living.
When you can see that, you begin to meet people
who are in the field of your bliss,
and they open the doors to you.
I say, follow your bliss and don't be afraid,
and doors will open where you didn't know they were going to be.
If you follow your bliss,
doors will open for you that wouldn't have opened for anyone else.
- Joseph Campbell
Don't go around saying the world owes you a living;
the world owes you nothing; it was here first.
- Mark Twain
I love being married.
It's so great to find that one special person
you want to annoy for the rest of your life.
- Rita Rudner
If you do what you've always done,
you'll get what you always got.
- Mark Twain
However beautiful the strategy,
you should occasionally look at the results.
- Winston Churchill
It ain't what you don't know that gets you into trouble.
It's what you know for sure that just ain't so.
- Mark Twain (attributed)
Yesterday is like a dung heap;
you can complain about the smell,
or you can use it to fertilize tomorrow's garden.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie
If you are not one of us, you are one of them.
- the movie The Matrix (1999)
Be careful not to do your good deeds
when there's no one watching you.
- Tom Lehrer
You want a friend in Washington? Get a dog.
- Harry S. Truman
When your friends begin to flatter
you on how young you look,
it's a sure sign you're getting old.
- Mark Twain
New Yorkers love it when you spill your guts out there.
Spill your guts at Wimbledon and they make you stop and clean it up.
- Jimmy Carter
Give a man one rabbit, and he will eat for a day;
give a man two rabbits, and he will
feed his family and his neighbors
and return you 64,768 rabbits in change.
- Anonymous
You're already a bastard.
Might as well be an enlightened one.
- the movie Simon Birch
When everything comes your way
you're in the wrong lane.
- Anonymous
You want to do mankind a real service?
Tell funnier jokes.
- the Woody Allen movie Stardust Memories (1980)
Will the people in the cheaper seats clap your hands?
And the rest of you, if you'll just rattle your jewelry.
- John Lennon
Afraid? Me? A man who's licked
his weight in wild caterpillars?
Afraid? You bet I'm afraid!
- Groucho Marx
Damn it boss, I like you too much not to say it.
You've got everything except one thing: madness!
- the movie Zorba The Greek
You might have seen a housefly, maybe even a superfly,
but I bet you ain't never seen a DONKEY fly!
- the movie Shrek (2001)
When you are courting a nice girl
an hour seems like a second.
When you sit on a red-hot cinder
a second seems like an hour.
That's relativity.
- Albert Einstein
You know what? Maybe there's a good reason
donkeys shouldn't talk.
- the movie Shrek (2001)
Oh, Shrek. Don't worry.
Things just seem bad because it's dark and rainy
and Fiona's father hired a sleazy hitman to whack you.
- the movie Shrek 2
Be careful about reading health books.
You may die of a misprint.
- Mark Twain
The most important words in the English language
are not "I love you" but "It's benign."
- the Woody Allen movie Deconstructing Harry
The worst part of success is to try to find
someone who is happy for you.
- Bette Midler
Life's like Vegas. You're up, you're down,
but in the end the house always wins.
Doesn't mean you didn't have fun.
- the Woody Allen movie Deconstructing Harry
To keep your marriage brimming,
With love in the wedding cup,
Whenever you're wrong, admit it;
Whenever you're right, shut up.
- Ogden Nash
And you just gotta remember, Sparky -
no matter what they tell you - you can NEVER have too much sugar.
- the movie Michael (1996)
Thank you for visiting: Funny Door Quotes - Funny Quotes about Door.
Please sign up on the form below to receive
my Free Daily Inspiration - Daily Quotes email.
You can also search my large collection of Funny Quotes.
May the world be kind to you,
and may your own thoughts be gentle upon yourself.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie
All materials & writings are copyright © Jonathan Lockwood Huie, except for quotes and other specifically identified material which belong to their respective copyright holders if applicable.