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Let these funny Disappointments Quotes from my large collection of funny quotes about life add a little humor to your day.
Ones best success comes after their greatest disappointments.
- Henry Ward Beecher
A newborn does not have worry, or stress, or anger,
because they have not yet learned those things.
Consider what life would be like if you could
forget all the past resentments and perceived offenses
that color your thinking and your emotions.
Buddhists call that state "beginner mind" -
an opening to experience life
without the jaundiced filter of past disappointments.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie
One cannot have everything the way he would like it.
A man has no business to be depressed by a disappointment,
anyway; he ought to make up his mind to get even.
- Mark Twain
Riches do not exhilarate us so much with their possession
as they torment us with their loss.
- Epicurus
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A particularly beautiful woman is a source of terror.
As a rule, a beautiful woman is a terrible disappointment.
- Carl Jung
The more you expect, the more you get disappointed in life.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie
Be clear that expectations are demands.
Demanding that life turn out the way we prefer
is a sure path to disappointment and suffering.
Happiness lies in having no expectations,
and accepting life as it comes.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie
When you find your path, you must not be afraid.
You need to have sufficient courage to make mistakes.
Disappointment, defeat, and despair are
the tools God uses to show us the way.
- Paulo Coelho
If we will be quiet and ready enough,
we shall find compensation in every disappointment.
- Henry David Thoreau
The size of your success is measured by
the strength of your desire;
the size of your dream;
and how you handle disappointment along the way.
- Robert Kiyosaki
We must accept finite disappointment,
but never lose infinite hope.
- Martin Luther King, Jr.
There can be no deep disappointment where there is not deep love.
- Martin Luther King, Jr.
When people get married because they think
it's a long-time love affair,
they'll be divorced very soon,
because all love affairs end in disappointment.
But marriage is a recognition of a spiritual identity.
- Joseph Campbell
Anger is something that each one of us has experienced -
some of us only occasionally, some almost daily.
Can we eliminate all anger? Probably not.
We will always have expectations,
and those expectations will often be unmet.
Disappointment is the principle cause of anger.
When we are disappointed, we look for someone to blame.
Declaring someone to be at fault is the nature of anger.
Anger is always directed at someone -
possibly toward God or the non-specific "they,"
but at some animate entity.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie
There is a secret wisdom-of-the-ages
that holds the key to breaking our
cycle of self-imposed suffering.
The secret wisdom is, "Life is not supposed to be fair."
This is not sad news. This is GLORIOUS news!
Life is not broken. Nothing is wrong.
God has not failed, died, or gone on vacation.
The world is working perfectly. We just misunderstood.
Somewhere along the way, someone got the idea that
life was "supposed" to be "fair,"
and all the trouble started -
expectation, disappointment, resentment, anger -
a whole cycle of suffering that began
with the belief that life is "supposed" to be "fair."
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie
You are not your mind. You, a Spiritual BEing,
are neither your mind nor your body.
Mind and body are your tools - to use as you choose.
Sometimes your body appears to have a will of its own,
as when it twitches or pains.
Likewise, your mind often appears to have its own will.
That incessant chattering of regret, disappointment, guilt,
shame, foreboding, worry, and fear
is your Rattlesnake Mind striking off on its own.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie
I love being married.
It's so great to find that one special person
you want to annoy for the rest of your life.
- Rita Rudner
Be careful not to do your good deeds
when there's no one watching you.
- Tom Lehrer
If you are not one of us, you are one of them.
- the movie The Matrix (1999)
One does not leave a convivial party before closing time.
- Winston Churchill
There's a couple of things they don't teach you
in Harvard Business School,
one is how to cope with defeat,
the other is how to handle a shotgun.
- The Simpsons Movie (2007)
One great thing about getting old is that
you can get out of all sorts of social obligations
just by saying you're too tired.
- George Carlin
Give a man one rabbit, and he will eat for a day;
give a man two rabbits, and he will
feed his family and his neighbors
and return you 64,768 rabbits in change.
- Anonymous
You ask me if I keep a notebook
to record my great ideas.
I've only ever had one.
- Albert Einstein
One good reason to only maintain a small circle of friends
is that three out of four murders
are committed by people who know the victim.
- George Carlin
You're already a bastard.
Might as well be an enlightened one.
- the movie Simon Birch
No one can have a higher opinion of you than I have,
and I think you're a slimy, contemptible sewer rat!
- the movie The Great Mouse Detective
Damn it boss, I like you too much not to say it.
You've got everything except one thing: madness!
- the movie Zorba The Greek
One good Husband is worth two good Wives;
for the scarcer things are, the more they're valued.
- Benjamin Franklin
Everyone should have at least two friends -
one to talk to and one to talk about.
- Anonymous
Love is the delusion that one woman differs from another.
- H. L. Mencken
One man's theology is another man's belly laugh.
- Robert A. Heinlein
When two people decide to get a divorce,
it isn't a sign that they "don't understand" one another,
but a sign that they have, at last, begun to.
- Helen Rowland
One man's remorse is another man's reminiscence.
- Ogden Nash
You know, it takes two to get one in trouble.
- the movie She Done Him Wrong (1933)
Oh, if only God would give me some sign.
If He would just speak to me once. Anything.
One sentence. Two words. If He would just cough.
- the movie Love and Death
It is a truth universally acknowledged that
when one part of your life starts going okay,
another falls spectacularly to pieces.
- the movie Bridget Jones Diary
Never argue at the dinner table, for the one who is not hungry
always gets the best of the argument.
- Voltaire
A friend is someone who will bail you out of jail.
A best friend is the one sitting next
to you saying "boy was that fun."
- The Maugles
No one knows what's next, but everybody does it.
- George Carlin
Tombs are the clothes of the dead.
A grave is a plain suit;
while an expensive monument is one with embroidery.
- R. Buckminster Fuller
To steal ideas from one person is plagiarism.
To steal from many is research.
- Anonymous
I've developed a new philosophy...
I only dread one day at a time.
- the character Charlie Brown in Charles M. Schulz' Peanuts comic
You can always do one thing less than you think you can.
- Anonymous
Never stir up litigation.
A worse man can scarcely be found than one who does this.
- Abraham Lincoln
In order to be an immaculate member of a flock of sheep,
one must above all be a sheep oneself.
- Albert Einstein
My father and he had one of those English friendships
which begins by avoiding the intimacies
and eventually eliminates speech altogether.
- Jorge Luis Borges
A true friend is one who
overlooks your failures
and tolerates your success.
- Doug Larson
I find that principles have no real force
except when one is well fed.
- Mark Twain
All diseases run into one - old age.
- Ralph Waldo Emerson
If God listened to the prayers of men,
all men would quickly have perished:
for they are forever praying for evil against one another.
- Epicurus
Perhaps one has to be very old before one learns
to be amused rather than shocked.
- Pearl S. Buck
Remember, if you ever need a helping hand,
you'll find one at the end of your arm.
- Audrey Hepburn
One's first love is always perfect
until one meets one's second love.
- Elizabeth Aston
One of the greatest pains to human nature is the pain of a new idea.
- Walter Bagehot
When written in Chinese, the word "crisis"
is composed of two characters.
One represents danger and the other represents opportunity.
- John F. Kennedy
Education is a method whereby
one acquires a higher grade of prejudices.
- Laurence J. Peter
She drove me to drink.
That's the one thing I'm indebted to her for.
- the movie Never Give a Sucker an Even Break
One man's "magic" is another man's engineering.
"Supernatural" is a null word.
- Robert A. Heinlein
Science is a wonderful thing
if one does not have to earn one's living at it.
- Albert Einstein
Every one desires to live long,
but no one would be old.
- Abraham Lincoln
Principles have no real force except when one is well-fed.
- Mark Twain
Question with boldness even the existence of a God;
because, if there be one, he must more approve of the homage of reason,
than that of blind-folded fear.
- Thomas Jefferson
Life is just one damned thing after another.
- Elbert Hubbard (Philistine - A Periodical of Protest, 1896)
There are three hundred and sixty-four days
when you might get un-birthday presents,
and only one for birthday presents, you know.
- Lewis Carroll
Bigamy is having one wife too many. Monogamy is the same.
- Oscar Wilde
One should never know too precisely
whom one has married
- Friedrich Nietzsche
When all think alike, no one is thinking very much.
- Walter Lippmann
If someone had told me I would be Pope one day,
I would have studied harder.
- Pope John Paul I
One does not discover new lands without consenting
to lose sight of the shore for a very long time.
- Andre Gide
If I were two-faced, would I be wearing this one?
- Abraham Lincoln
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May the world be kind to you,
and may your own thoughts be gentle upon yourself.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie
All materials & writings are copyright © Jonathan Lockwood Huie, except for quotes and other specifically identified material which belong to their respective copyright holders if applicable.