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Funny Directions Quotes
Funny Quotes about Directions

Let these funny Directions Quotes from my large collection of funny quotes about life add a little humor to your day.

The IQ and the life expectancy of the average American
recently passed each other in opposite directions.
- George Carlin

Individually, we do have our crises -
mostly from unexpected directions,
but so have all people from all ages.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie

Trees go wandering forth in all directions with every wind,
going and coming like ourselves,
traveling with us around the sun two million miles a day,
and through space heaven knows how fast and far!
- John Muir

Use the power of your word
in the direction of truth and love.
- don Miguel Ruiz


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Go confidently in the direction of your dreams.
Live the life you have imagined.
- Henry David Thoreau

Success is often the result of taking
a misstep in the right direction.
- Al Bernstein

Greatness is not in where we stand,
but in what direction we are moving.
We must sail sometimes with the wind
and sometimes against it -
but sail we must,
and not drift, nor lie at anchor.
- Oliver Wendell Holmes, Jr.


 

Calm provides clarity. Pause to consider
the gifts you have been given,
the difference you have made
and the direction in which you are headed.
- Anonymous

Love does not consist in gazing at each other,
but in looking outward together in the same direction.
- Antoine de Saint-Exupery

Having set a direction, begin - begin today.
Take action - take action every day.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie

Efforts and courage are not enough without purpose and direction.
- John F. Kennedy

If you do not change direction,
you may end up where you are heading.
- Lao Tzu

If one advances confidently
in the direction of his dreams,
and endeavors to live
the life which he has imagined,
he will meet with success
unexpected in common hours.
- Henry David Thoreau

Any intelligent fool can make things bigger and more complex...
It takes a touch of genius - and a lot of courage
to move in the opposite direction.
- Albert Einstein

Breaking up is a natural evolution
when you try to figure out what you want in life.
If you're with an individual
who isn't moving in the same direction
and at the same rate that you are,
it ain't going to work.
- Usher Raymond

Conversations with God are very different
from the usual nature of prayer.
Prayers are commonly only in one direction -
the one praying speaks and hopes God is listening.
Prayers also tend to focus on asking
for specific things or outcomes one wants,
rather than seeking to better understand the mind of God.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie

Choose your goal and keep your eye on it. Never give up.
Perhaps you will need to change your plan
and approach you goal from a different direction, but don't quit.
Keep thinking. Keep re-planning. Keep going.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie

Let today be a day to trust your own inner guidance,
a day to have faith that your steps are carrying you
in the direction you desire,
a day to keep your eyes on the heavens
and believe that your feet will carry you well.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie

If you advance confidently in the direction of your dreams
and endeavor to leave the life which you have imagined,
you will you will meet with a success unexpected in common hours.
- Henry David Thoreau

I have learned, that if one advances confidently
in the direction of his dreams,
and endeavors to live the life he has imagined,
he will meet with a success unexpected in common hours.
- Henry David Thoreau

Be Impeccable With Your Word.
Speak with integrity.
Say only what you mean.
Avoid using your word to speak against yourself
or to gossip about others.
Use the power of your word
in the direction of truth and love.
- don Miguel Ruiz

I like to talk about a thing I call a "practiced pause."
Just a few moments of pausing allows me
to consider a circumstance and take stock
of what the best direction might be.
Reactions tend to rise from habit and unconsidered action.
A Response is considered and thoughtful.
My actions are my own and I am, singularly,
responsible for what I see, say, feel and exert.
- Mary Anne Radmacher

If one advances confidently in the direction of his dreams,
and endeavors to live the life which he has imagined,
he will meet with a success unexpected in common hours.
He will put some things behind, will pass an invisible boundary;
new, universal, and more liberal laws
will begin to establish themselves around and within him;
or the old laws be expanded, and interpreted in his favor
in a more liberal sense,
and he will live with the license of a higher order of beings.
- Henry David Thoreau

Seeing my glass of life as mostly full
triggers an amazing cycle of transformation
Appreciation for the abundance of life incites gratitude -
which brings on that warm comfortable
feeling of joy and satisfaction with life.
Gratitude for abundance also creates increasing abundance.
Being truly grateful for the abundance that
is now in my life causes an ever greater abundance
to flow in my direction.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie

The only thing to do with good advice is to pass it on.
It is never of any use to oneself.
- Oscar Wilde

Yesterday is like a dung heap;
you can complain about the smell,
or you can use it to fertilize tomorrow's garden.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie

Life is like a ten speed bicycle.
Most of us have gears we never use.
- Charles M. Schulz

"When I use a word," Humpty Dumpty said in rather a scornful tone,
"it means just what I choose it to mean - neither more nor less."
- Lewis Carroll

There is no use whatsoever trying to help
people who do not help themselves.
You cannot push anyone up a ladder
unless he is willing to climb himself.
- Andrew Carnegie

The civilized man has built a coach,
but has lost the use of his feet.
- Ralph Waldo Emerson

I always pass on good advice.
It is the only thing to do with it.
It is never of any use to oneself.
- Oscar Wilde

If at first you don't succeed,
try, try, and try again.
Then give up.
There's no use being a damned fool about it.
- W. C. Fields

What would be the use of immortality to a person
who cannot use well a half an hour.
- Ralph Waldo Emerson

Do not use a hatchet to remove
a fly from your friend's forehead.
- Chinese Proverb

In life you are given two ends;
one to think with and the other to sit on.
Your success in life depends on which end you use most.
Heads you win, tails you lose.
- Conrad Burns

"Worry" is a word that I don't allow myself to use.
- Dwight D. Eisenhower

It is more fun to talk with someone who doesn't use long, difficult words
but rather short, easy words like "What about lunch?"
- A. A. Milne (Winnie-The-Pooh)

People hardly ever make use of the freedom which they have,
for example, freedom of thought;
instead they demand freedom of speech as a compensation.
- Soren Kierkegaard

Don't fight forces, use them.
- R. Buckminster Fuller

Use what language you will,
you can never say anything but what you are.
- Ralph Waldo Emerson

If the problem can be solved,
there is no use worrying about it.
If it can't be solved,
worrying will do no good.
- Tibetan proverb

Capital as such is not evil; it is its wrong use that is evil.
Capital in some form or other will always be needed.
- Mohandas (Mahatma) Gandhi

Use what talents you possess.
The woods would be very silent
if no birds sang there,
except those that sang best.
- Henry Van Dyke

No free man shall ever be debarred the use of arms.
- Thomas Jefferson

If I mayn't tell you what I feel,
what is the use of a friend?
- William Makepeace Thackeray

What's the use of a fine house if you haven't got
a tolerable planet to put it on?
- Henry David Thoreau

Understand that the right to
choose your own path
is a sacred privilege.
Use it.
Dwell in possibility.
- Oprah Winfrey

We must use time creatively.
- Martin Luther King, Jr.

We must use time wisely and forever realize
that the time is always ripe to do right.
- Nelson Mandela

Make the best use of what is in your power,
and take the rest as it happens.
- Epictetus

All the energy of the universe is mine
to use as spirit directs.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie

The less I take the difficulties of my life as personal affront,
and the more I use them as an opportunity to learn and grow...
the easier I sleep at night.
- Mary Anne Radmacher

Men have a respect for scholarship and learning
greatly out of proportion to the use they commonly serve.
- Henry David Thoreau

We must use time as a tool, not as a crutch.
- John F. Kennedy

The road to freedom lies not through
mysteries or occult performances,
but through the intelligent use
of natural forces and laws.
- Ernest Holmes

Is the system going to flatten you out
and deny you your humanity,
or are you going to be able to make use of the system
to the attainment of human purposes?
- Joseph Campbell

Fear has its use but cowardice has none.
- Mohandas (Mahatma) Gandhi

Politics are very much like war.
We may even have to use poison gas at times.
- Winston Churchill

I am an optimist.
It does not seem too much use being anything else.
- Winston Churchill

Before we acquire great power
we must acquire wisdom to use it well.
- Ralph Waldo Emerson

Education is the most powerful weapon
which you can use to change the world.
- Nelson Mandela

INTENT:
We hold the power to make things happen
through our intent -
to the extent that we use our intention
with compassion and without ego.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie

It is no use walking anywhere to preach
unless our walking is our preaching.
- St. Francis of Assisi

I deplore the need or the use of troops anywhere
to get American citizens to obey
the orders of constituted courts.
- Dwight D. Eisenhower

The means we use must be as pure
as the ends we seek.
- Martin Luther King, Jr.

Time stays long enough for anyone who will use it.
- Leonardo da Vinci

There is a power for good in the universe
greater than you are and you can use it.
- Ernest Holmes

In all my ways of seeing - may I use new glasses,
a telescope and a microscope.
And may I always allow myself to see a circumstance
through the tender hearts of my friends.
- Mary Anne Radmacher

It is not enough to have a good mind,
the main thing is to use it well.
- Rene Descartes

Hide not your talents,
they for use were made.
What's a sundial in the shade?
- Benjamin Franklin

It is no use saying, "We are doing our best."
You have got to succeed in doing what is necessary.
- Winston Churchill


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May the world be kind to you,
and may your own thoughts be gentle upon yourself.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie


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