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Funny Quotes about Life
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Funny Difference Quotes
Funny Quotes about Difference

Let these funny Difference Quotes from my large collection of funny quotes about life add a little humor to your day.

I never considered a difference of opinion
in politics, in religion, in philosophy,
as cause for withdrawing from a friend.
- Thomas Jefferson

The difference between stupidity and genius
is that genius has its limits.
- Albert Einstein

In theory there is no difference between theory and practice.
In practice there is.
- Yogi Berra

Difference of opinion is advantageous in religion.
The several sects perform the office of a Censor -
over each other.
- Thomas Jefferson


 

The difference between school and life?
In school, you're taught a lesson and then given a test.
In life, you're given a test that teaches you a lesson.
- Tom Bodett

A difference of opinion is what makes horse racing and missionaries.
- Will Rogers

I don't know, I don't care,
and it doesn't make any difference!
- Albert Einstein


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I am a Passionate Observer of Life.
I See the events, feel the emotions,
and recognize the difference.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie

God grant me the serenity
To accept the things I cannot change;
the courage to change the things I can;
and the wisdom to know the difference.
- Reinhold Niebuhr (Serenity Prayer)

I will act as if what I do makes a difference.
- William James

Fear of difference is fear of life itself.
- M. P. Follett

We don't have a monopoly.
We have market share.
There's a difference.
- Steve Ballmer

The difference between a successful person and others
is not a lack of strength,
not a lack of knowledge,
but rather a lack of will.
- Vince Lombardi

Love and kindness are never wasted.
They always make a difference.
They bless the one who receives them,
and they bless you, the giver.
- Barbara de Angelis

There's a difference between knowing the path and walking the path.
- the character Morpheus in the movie The Matrix

The difference between the impossible and the possible
lies in a persons determination.
- Tommy Lasorda

The only difference between the Democrats and the Republicans
is that the Democrats allow the poor to be corrupt,
too.
- Oscar Levant

There is only one difference between a long life and a good dinner:
that,
in the dinner, the sweets come last.
- Robert Louis Stevenson

Two little words that can make the difference: START NOW.
- Mary C. Crowley

The "stories" we choose to tell about our past
are never what a video camera would have recorded.
We can tell a sad story or a happy story,
and neither story is either
more accurate or "better" than the other story.
The difference is that one story causes us to suffer,
while the other brings us joy. I choose joy.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie

Be an Observer of Life.
See the events, feel the emotions,
and recognize the difference.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie

Two roads diverged in a wood, and I ...
I took the one less traveled by,
and that has made all the difference.
- Robert Frost

The difference between chirping out of turn and a faux
pas depends on what kind of a bar you're in.
- Wilson Mizner

The difference between work and play lies 100%
in the attitude of the participant.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie

If humanity does not opt for integrity we are through completely.
It is absolutely touch and go.
Each one of us could make the difference.
- R. Buckminster Fuller

The difference between ordinary and extraordinary is that little extra.
- Jimmy Johnson

Do you know the difference between education and experience?
Education is when you read the fine print;
experience is what you get when you don't.
- Pete Seeger

It's the Consciousness with which we participate
in activities that makes the difference.
- Michael Beckwith

It's easy to make a buck.
It's a lot tougher to make a difference.
- Tom Brokaw

There's a world of difference between truth and facts.
Facts can obscure truth.
- Maya Angelou

Attitude is a little thing that makes a big difference.
- Winston Churchill

The difference between what we do
and what we are capable of doing
would suffice to solve most of the world's problem.
- Mohandas (Mahatma) Gandhi

Death is no more than passing from one room into another.
But there's a difference for me, you know.
Because in that other room I shall be able to see.
- Helen Keller

Know the power of perspective.
Be a passionate observer of life.
See the events, feel the emotions,
and recognize the difference.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie

Remind people that profit is the difference between revenue and expense.
This makes you look smart.
- Scott Adams

A little Consideration, a little Thought for Others, makes all the difference.
- A. A. Milne (Winnie-The-Pooh)

The difference in golf and government is that in golf
you can't improve your lie.
- George Deukmejian

Everyone who's ever taken a shower has an idea.
It's the person who gets out of the shower,
dries off and does something about it who makes a difference.
- Nolan Bushnell

Act as if what you do makes a difference.
It does.
- William James

There's a big difference between a handout and a helping hand.
One's charity, the other's friendship.
- Little Joe' Cartwright in Bonanza - Rain from Heaven

The difference between men friends and women friends
is that men tend to do things together,
women tend to just be together.
- Art Jahnke

The big difference between sex for money and sex for
free is that sex for money usually costs a lot less.
- Brendan Behan

Doctors are just the same as lawyers;
the only difference is that lawyers merely rob you,
whereas doctors rob you and kill you too.
- Anton Chekhov

I don't paint things.
I only paint the difference between things.
- Henri Matisse

You should never be content with so little,
when you can reach out for something big.
- Charles L. Allen
(This quote is about making a big difference
in the world - not about greed)

Whenever you're in conflict with someone,
there is one factor that can make the difference
between damaging your relationship and deepening it.
That factor is attitude.
- William James

Calm provides clarity. Pause to consider
the gifts you have been given,
the difference you have made
and the direction in which you are headed.
- Anonymous

There is more difference in the quality
of our pleasures than in the amount.
- Ralph Waldo Emerson

In matters of truth and justice,
there is no difference between large and small problems,
for issues concerning the treatment of people are all the same.
- Albert Einstein

When we ask for love, we don't ask others to be fair
to us-but rather to care for us,
to be considerate of us.
There is a world of difference here between demanding justice...
and begging or pleading for love.
- Mortimer Adler

If a country is to be corruption free and become a
nation of beautiful minds,
I strongly feel there are three key societal members
who can make a difference.
They are the father, the mother and the teacher.
- Abdul Kalam

Many a person has held close, throughout their entire lives,
two friends that always remained strange to one another,
because one of them attracted by virtue of similarity,
the other by difference.
- Emil Ludwig

The difference between the old ballplayer and the new
ballplayer is the jersey.
The old ballplayer cared about the name on the front.
The new ballplayer cares about the name on the back.
- Steve Garvey

Understand the difference between "failing,"
which each of us does often,
and "being a failure,"
which is a state of mind no one should
ever allow themself to fall into.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie

Societies need rules that make no sense for individuals.
For example, it makes no difference whether a single
car drives on the left or on the right.
But it makes all the difference when there are many cars!
- Marvin Minsky

What difference does it make to the dead,
the orphans, and the homeless,
whether the mad destruction is wrought
under the name of totalitarianism
or the holy name of liberty or democracy?
- Mohandas (Mahatma) Gandhi

Almost nothing you worry about today
will matter in a hundred years.
Think carefully about what you can focus on today.
Choose tasks that will actually make a positive difference
to your great-grandchildren.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie

It's the little things you do
that can make a big difference.
What are you attempting to accomplish?
What little thing can you do today
that will make you more effective?
You are probably only one step away from greatness.
- Bob Proctor

We may be so eager to protect the right to dissent
that we lose sight of the difference between dissent and subversion.
- Richard Perle

The most considerable difference I note among men is
not in their readiness to fall into error,
but in their readiness to acknowledge these inevitable lapses.
- Thomas Huxley

It doesn't make much difference how the paint is put
on as long as something has been said.
Technique is just a means of arriving at a statement.
- Jackson Pollock

Man is the only animal that laughs and weeps;
for he is the only animal that is struck with the difference between what things are,
and what they ought to be.
- William Hazlitt

I chose to go to law school because I thought that someday,
somehow I'd make a difference.
- Christopher Darden

The difference between one man and another is not mere ability it is energy.
- Thomas Arnold

The support in Britain made a big difference.
- Louise Woodward

What's the difference between tough love and acting like a jerk?
- Ricki Lake

Don't make art for other artists or for 'intellectuals',
make art for people - and if you can touch just one
person in a lifetime and make a difference -
you have succeeded.
- Ray Conniff

My choice early in life was either to be a piano-player
in a whorehouse or a politician.
And to tell the truth, there's hardly any difference.
- Harry S. Truman

The only difference from one $100 million budget film
to another is which of the 12 box stars are getting $20 million to be in it.
- Dirk Benedict

George Bush is not stupid.
He's evil.
OK? There's a huge difference between stupid and evil.
- Patton Oswalt

Perhaps we too seldom reflect how much the life of
Nature is one with the life of man,
how unimportant or indeed merely seeming,
the difference between them.
- Richard Le Gallienne


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- Jonathan Lockwood Huie

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