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Funny Diets Quotes
Funny Quotes about Diets

Let these funny Diets Quotes from my large collection of funny quotes about life add a little humor to your day.

Diets, like clothes, should be tailored to you.
- Joan Rivers

I used to be hung up on my figure, but it's a waste of time.
I don't believe in diets.
Have four pints one night, be healthy the next.
- Sophie Ellis Bextor

I don't believe in fad diets.
- Jenny Craig

I started dieting.
I dieted, dieted, dieted and tried all the diets and
I would lose and then I would go back to normal eating
and would put it on and then some.
- Suzanne Somers


 

I never worry about diets.
The only carrots that interest me are the number you get in a diamond.
- Mae West

I'm very girly.
I love to talk about diets, exercise,
kids, make-up.
- Rachel Hunter

As for those grapefruit and buttermilk diets,
I'll take roast chicken and dumplings.
- Hattie McDaniel


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Everyone would talk about their diets and working out
and what it made me do was go to craft services where
all the food for the cast and crew was and I would eat.
- Kristin Davis

I have been on diets that were supervised by doctors,
that were carefully supervised where I lost weight.
- Roberta Flack

I feel about airplanes the way I feel about diets.
It seems to me that they are wonderful things for other people to go on.
- Jean Kerr

They sent me to these places to get the weight off.
The diets never worked; the diets actually made it worse.
- Lisa Whelchel

It is vital that we provide North Dakota's children
with nutritionally sound diets.
That means ensuring that they are getting plenty of
fresh fruits and vegetables,
and are developing good eating habits for their future.
- Kent Conrad

Do not suppose, however, that I intend to urge a diet of classics on anybody.
I have seen such diets at work.
I have known people who have actually read all,
or almost all, the guaranteed Hundred Best Books.
God save us from reading nothing but the best.
- Robertson Davies

We help people to begin truly healthful diets,
and it is absolutely wonderful to see,
not only their success, but also their delight at their
ability to break old habits and feel really healthy for a change.
- Neal Barnard

To many, Homer may appear lazy and a loser,
but he's just much misguided.
He's boorish, sure, but well meaning and,
I guess, the one thing we have in common is the pursuit of lousy diets.
- Dan Castellaneta

Food is an important part of a balanced diet.
- Fran Lebowitz

A friend doesn't go on a diet because you are fat.
- Erma Bombeck

In the course of my life, I have often had to eat my words,
and I must confess that I have always found it a wholesome diet.
- Winston Churchill

It looks to me to be obvious that the whole world cannot eat an American diet.
- Jerry Brown

I am not naturally that thin, so I had to go through
everything from using drugs to diet pills to laxatives to fasting.
Those were my main ways of controlling my weight.
- Carre Otis

An optimist is a person who starts a new diet on Thanksgiving Day.
- Irv Kupcinet

I told my doctor I get very tired when I go on a diet,
so he gave me pep pills.
Know what happened? I ate faster.
- Joe E. Lewis

What some call health, if purchased by perpetual anxiety about diet,
isn't much better than tedious disease.
- Alexander Pope

No disease that can be treated by diet should be treated with any other means.
- Maimonides

I've been on a diet for two weeks and all I've lost is two weeks.
- Totie Fields

Adopting a new healthier lifestyle can involve changing
diet to include more fresh fruit and vegetables as
well as increasing levels of exercise.
- Linford Christie

A boxer's diet should be low in fat and high in proteins and sugar.
Therefore you should eat plenty of lean meat,
milk, leafy vegetables, and fresh fruit and ice cream for sugar.
- Gene Tunney

Vegetables are a must on a diet.
I suggest carrot cake, zucchini bread,
and pumpkin pie.
- Jim Davis

As I mentioned previously, the tools that allow for
optimum health are diet and exercise.
- Bill Toomey

He who takes medicine and neglects his diet
wastes the skill of his doctors.
- Chinese Proverb

A safe and nutritionally adequate diet is a basic individual
right and an essential condition for sustainable development,
especially in developing countries.
- Gro Harlem Brundtland

There are six components of wellness:
proper weight and diet,
proper exercise, breaking the smoking habit,
control of alcohol, stress management and periodic exams.
- Kenneth H. Cooper

The second day of a diet is always easier than the first.
By the second day you're off it.
- Jackie Gleason

I followed the same diet for 20 years,
eliminating starches, living on salads,
lean meat, and small portions.
- Gene Tierney

I never diet.
I smoke.
I drink now and then.
I never work out.
- Naomi Campbell

The circuit training program along with a healthy clean
diet is the way to excellent results.
- Lee Haney

You can't be fat and fast, too; so lift,
run, diet and work.
- Hank Stram

I don't believe in depriving myself of any food or
being imprisoned by a diet.
- Joely Fisher

Dieting is murder on the road.
Show me a man who travels and I'll show you one who eats.
- Bruce Froemming

I don't eat junk foods and I don't think junk thoughts.
- Peace Pilgrim

People who shop in health food stores never look healthy.
- Amy Sedaris

Some people are willing to pay the price and it's the
same with staying healthy or eating healthy.
There's some discipline involved.
There's some sacrifices.
- Mike Ditka

I don't go long without eating.
I never starve myself: I grab a healthy snack.
- Vanessa Hudgens

If you've got a big gut and you start doing sit-ups,
you are going to get bigger because you build up the muscle.
You've got to get rid of that fat!
How do you get rid of fat? By changing your diet.
- Jack LaLanne

I refuse to spend my life worrying about what I eat.
There is no pleasure worth forgoing just for an extra
three years in the geriatric ward.
- John Mortimer

If I like myself at this weight, then this is what I'm going to be.
I don't have an eating disorder.
- Courteney Cox

I highly recommend worrying.
It is much more effective than dieting.
- William Powell

Each of us should take personal responsibility for our diet,
and our children's diet, and the government's role
should be to make certain it provides the best information
possible to help people stay healthy.
- James Talent

High-quality food is better for your health.
- Michael Pollan

It seems every year, people make the resolution to
exercise and lose weight and get in shape.
- Ed Smith

I don't believe in dieting.
- Joan Collins

Feeding is a very important ritual for me.
I don't trust people who don't like to eat.
- Gina Gershon

I am now in that happy comfortable state that I do
not hesitate to indulge in any fancy in regard to diet,
but watch the consequences, and do not continue any
course which adds to weight or bulk and consequent discomfort.
- William Banting

And let's be clear: It's not enough just to limit ads
for foods that aren't healthy.
It's also going to be critical to increase marketing
for foods that are healthy.
- Michelle Obama

I thought, you know the food and the diet thing is
one way to start yourself onto a healthy lifestyle,
but if you don't move, if you don't start exercising
you're gonna deteriorate.
- Warren Cuccurullo

French fries.
I love them.
Some people are chocolate and sweets people.
I love French fries.
That and caviar.
- Cameron Diaz

I have been dairy free for several years,
and I started because I felt it was going to reduce my allergies,
which it did, and help me lose weight,
which it did.
- Fran Drescher

My doctor told me to stop having intimate dinners for four.
Unless there are three other people.
- Orson Welles

The only way you get that fat off is to eat less and exercise more.
- Jack LaLanne

I'm lucky, I don't like sweets, not even chocolate.
- Eva Herzigova

Do you know how many calories are in butter and cheese
and ice cream? Would you get your dog up in the morning
for a cup of coffee and a donut?
- Jack LaLanne

A systemic cleansing and detox is definitely the way
to go after each holiday.
It is the key to fighting high blood pressure,
heart disease, cancer, and other health-related illnesses.
- Lee Haney

Leave the table while you still feel you could eat a little more.
- Helena Rubinstein

We can all put weight on or lose weight.
- Keith Emerson

Cereal eating is almost a marker for a healthy lifestyle.
It sets you up for the day, so you don't overeat.
- Bruce Barton

The best way to lose weight is to close your mouth -
something very difficult for a politician.
Or watch your food - just watch it, don't eat it.
- Edward Koch

Health food makes me sick.
- Calvin Trillin

My experience as a school nurse taught me that we need
to make a concerted effort,
all of us, to increase physical fitness activity among
our children and to encourage all Americans to adopt
a healthier diet that includes fruits and vegetables,
but there is more.
- Lois Capps

You see people who have been very heavy in their life
who have taken that body,
trimmed it down, firmed it up through discipline,
exercise and being able to say no.
Eating properly, that all comes into it.
- Mike Ditka

Childhood obesity is best tackled at home through improved parental involvement,
increased physical exercise, better diet and restraint from eating.
- Bob Filner

So, when it comes to eating healthy,
it's just doing the right thing.
And it's not something you have to do 365 days a year,
but I think it's something you have to do 25 days a month.
Let's put it that way.
- Mike Ditka


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