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Let these funny Diapers Quotes from my large collection of funny quotes about life add a little humor to your day.
Politicians and diapers need to be changed regularly,
usually for the same reason.
- Anonymous
Mothers all want their sons to grow up to be president,
but they don't want them to become politicians in the process.
- John F. Kennedy
I am never going to have anything more to do
with politics or politicians.
When this war is over I shall confine myself entirely
to writing and painting.
- Winston Churchill
I'm always rather nervous about how you talk
about women who are active in politics,
whether they want to be talked about as women or as politicians.
- John F. Kennedy
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Men are what their mothers made them.
- Ralph Waldo Emerson
God could not be everywhere, so he created mothers.
- Jewish Proverb
The being of our mothers is forever branded onto our own being.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie
Women want mediocre men,
and men are working to be as mediocre as possible.
- Margaret Mead
A man likes his wife to be
just clever enough to appreciate his cleverness,
and just stupid enough to admire it.
- Israel Zangwill
Here's a toast to your new bride who has everything a girl
could want in her life, except for good taste in men.
- Anonymous
Men always want to be a woman's first love -
women like to be a man's last romance.
- Oscar Wilde
It's not the men in your life that counts,
it's the life in your men.
- Mae West, in the movie I'm No Angel
Women marry men hoping they will change.
Men marry women hoping they will not.
- Albert Einstein
History teaches us that men and nations behave wisely
only after they have exhausted all other alternatives.
- Abba Eban
The greatest deception men suffer is from their own opinions.
- Leonardo da Vinci
It is an interesting question how far men
would retain their relative rank
if they were divested of their clothes.
- Henry David Thoreau
Women who seek to be equal with men lack ambition.
- Marilyn Monroe
Thank God men cannot fly, and lay waste
the sky as well as the earth.
- Henry David Thoreau
The means by which we live have outdistanced
the ends for which we live.
Our scientific power has outrun our spiritual power.
We have guided missiles and misguided men.
- Martin Luther King, Jr.
Men have become the tools of their tools.
- Henry David Thoreau
It has always been a mystery to me
how men can feel themselves honored
by the humiliation of their fellow beings.
- Mohandas (Mahatma) Gandhi
Our scientific power has outrun our spiritual power.
We have guided missiles and misguided men.
- Martin Luther King, Jr.
My plan was to kiss her with every lip on my face.
- the movie Dead Men Don't Wear Plaid
If God listened to the prayers of men,
all men would quickly have perished:
for they are forever praying for evil against one another.
- Epicurus
In critical moments men sometimes see
exactly what they wish to see.
- the character Spock of the television series Star Trek
I don't advise a haircut, man.
All hairdressers are in the employment of the government.
Hairs are your aerials.
They pick up signals from the cosmos,
and transmit them directly into the brain.
This is the reason bald-headed men are uptight.
- the movie Withnail & I
She's been diagnosed as a paranoid hypochondriac.
Doctors think she may be faking.
- the movie Dead Men Don't Wear Plaid
Most men lead lives of quiet desperation
and go to the grave with the song still in them.
- Henry David Thoreau
Force always attracts men of low morality.
- Albert Einstein
I begin with the principle that all men are bores.
Surely no one will prove himself
so great a bore as to contradict me in this.
- Soren Kierkegaard
I think men who have a pierced ear
are better prepared for marriage.
They've experienced pain and bought jewelry.
- Rita Rudner
Few men have virtue to withstand the highest bidder.
- George Washington
In every society some men are born to rule,
and some to advise.
- Ralph Waldo Emerson
Nearly all men can stand adversity,
but if you want to test a man's character, give him power.
- Abraham Lincoln
While civilization has been improving our houses,
it has not equally improved
the men who are to inhabit them.
It has created palaces, but it was
not so easy to create noblemen and kings.
- Henry David Thoreau
The only thing necessary for evil to triumph
is for enough good men to do nothing.
- Edmund Burke
When It's Darkest, Men See the Stars.
- Ralph Waldo Emerson
Tolerance is the first principle of community;
it is the spirit which conserves
the best that all men think.
- Helen Keller
It takes time to persuade men to do even
what is for their own good.
- Thomas Jefferson
The revelation of thought takes men
out of servitude into freedom.
- Ralph Waldo Emerson
My heart bleeds at the death of every one of our gallant men.
- Robert E. Lee
The mass of men lead lives of quiet desperation.
- Henry David Thoreau
Who never walks save where he sees
men's tracks, makes no discoveries.
- J. G. Holland
A person is smart. People are dumb,
panicky dangerous animals and you know it.
Fifteen hundred years ago everybody knew
the Earth was the center of the universe.
Five hundred years ago,
everybody knew the Earth was flat,
and fifteen minutes ago,
you knew that humans were alone on this planet.
Imagine what you'll know tomorrow.
- the movie Men in Black
I look only to the good qualities of men.
Not being faultless myself,
I won't presume to probe into the faults of others.
- Mohandas (Mahatma) Gandhi
It is not work that kills men; it is worry.
Worry is rust upon the blade.
- Henry Ward Beecher
Men never do evil so completely and cheerfully
as when they do it from religious conviction.
- Blaise Pascal
Every kind of peaceful cooperation among men
is primarily based on mutual trust
and only secondarily on institutions
such as courts of justice and police.
- Albert Einstein
One machine can do the work of fifty ordinary men.
No machine can do the work of one extraordinary man.
- Elbert Hubbard
The problems of the world cannot possibly
be solved by skeptics or cynics
whose horizons are limited by the obvious realities.
We need men who can dream of things that never were.
- John F. Kennedy
We who lived in concentration camps can remember the men
who walked through the huts comforting others,
giving away their last piece of bread...
They offer sufficient proof that everything
can be taken from a man but one thing:
to choose one's attitude in any given set of circumstances,
to choose one's own way.
- Viktor E. Frankl
Every actual State is corrupt.
Good men must not obey laws too well.
- Ralph Waldo Emerson
All men's souls are immortal,
but the souls of the righteous are immortal and divine.
- Socrates
Though force can protect in emergency,
only justice, fairness, consideration and cooperation
can finally lead men to the dawn of eternal peace.
- Dwight D. Eisenhower
The law will never make a man free;
it is men who have got to make the law free.
- Henry David Thoreau
Nothing astonishes men so much as common sense and plain dealing.
- Ralph Waldo Emerson
We the people are the rightful masters
of both Congress and the courts,
not to overthrow the Constitution
but to overthrow the men who pervert the Constitution.
- Abraham Lincoln
Love men and women not for their strength
but their softness,
not for their fullness but their hunger,
not for their plenty but their need.
- Anais Nin
(paraphrase)
Men are not prisoners of fate,
but only prisoners of their own minds.
- Franklin D. Roosevelt
There is a natural aristocracy among men.
The grounds of this are virtue and talents.
- Thomas Jefferson
Instead of noblemen,
let us have noble villages of men.
- Henry David Thoreau
We know but a few men, a great many coats and breeches.
- Henry David Thoreau
Most men pursue pleasure with such breathless haste
that they hurry past it.
- Soren Kierkegaard
All men are children, and of one family.
The same tale sends them all to bed,
and wakes them in the morning.
- Henry David Thoreau
Difficulties show men what they are.
In case of any difficulty,
remember that God has pitted you
against a rough antagonist
that you may be a conqueror,
and this cannot be without toil.
- Epictetus
Many men go fishing all of their lives
without knowing that it is not fish they are after.
- Henry David Thoreau
Men and women are not prisoners of fate,
but only prisoners of their own minds.
- Franklin D. Roosevelt
To sin by silence when they should protest makes cowards of men.
- Abraham Lincoln
The price of apathy towards public affairs
is to be ruled by evil men.
- Plato
A nation or civilization that
continues to produce soft-minded men
purchases its own spiritual death
on the installment plan.
- Martin Luther King, Jr.
Violent men have not been known in history to die to a man.
They die up to a point.
- Mohandas (Mahatma) Gandhi
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May the world be kind to you,
and may your own thoughts be gentle upon yourself.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie
All materials & writings are copyright © Jonathan Lockwood Huie, except for quotes and other specifically identified material which belong to their respective copyright holders if applicable.