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Funny Described Quotes
Funny Quotes about Described

Let these funny Described Quotes from my large collection of funny quotes about life add a little humor to your day.

All these primary impulses,
not easily described in words,
are the springs of man's actions.
- Albert Einstein

The Spirit is described in the Holy Scriptures
as much more anarchic than any established religion credits.
- Bono

Every natural fact is a symbol of some spiritual fact.
Every appearance in nature corresponds to some state of the mind,
and that state of the mind can only be described
by presenting that natural appearance as its picture.
- Ralph Waldo Emerson

If you are out to describe the truth,
leave elegance to the tailor.
- Albert Einstein


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Tact is the ability to describe others as they see themselves.
- Abraham Lincoln

"Beginner Mind" is a Zen Buddhist term
that describes moving past our assumptions
of the nature of our life,
and really SEEING our surroundings -
especially the people we interact with -
with new eyes.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie

Each of us holds a different image of God.
There are as many perspectives on
the nature of God as there are people.
However much any of us may choose to argue,
or to fight and kill, for our point of view,
the nature of God is an unanswerable question.
Perhaps there is a specific answer,
that we will never learn - in this lifetime.
Perhaps the nature of God is so complex and multifaceted
that each view of God describes an aspect of the complex whole.
Or perhaps the nature of God is actually defined by our beliefs.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie


 

The movie character Forrest Gump describing life
as being "like a box of chocolates,"
is such a positive upbeat way of
characterizing the uncertainty of life.
I have no idea what life will give me next,
but whatever it is, it will be sweet.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie

What exactly is the function of a rubber duck?
- the movie Harry Potter and the Chamber of Secrets (2002)

If you are not one of us, you are one of them.
- the movie The Matrix (1999)

Sucking the marrow out of life
doesn't mean choking on the bone.
- Robin Williams as John Keating
in the 1989 movie Dead Poets Society

Life ... full of loneliness, and misery,
and suffering, and unhappiness,
and it's all over much too quickly.
- the Woody Allen movie Annie Hall

And you just gotta remember, Sparky -
no matter what they tell you - you can NEVER have too much sugar.
- the movie Michael (1996)

There's nothing wrong with being afraid.
We were meant to be afraid.
- the Woody Allen movie Anything Else

Fasten your safety belts, clench your buttocks!
It's going be a bumpy ride!
- the movie Harry Potter and the Prisoner of Azkaban (2004)

Now, if you don't mind, I'd appreciate it if you could lower your wand.
- the movie Harry Potter and the Prisoner of Azkaban

This is an occasion for genuinely tiny knickers.
- the movie Bridget Jones Diary (2001)

I got a perfect build for clothes.
I'm a twenty-eight dwarf.
- the movie Love and Death

I don't care whose fault this was, just get it sorted!
And could someone please bring me something deep fat fried
and smothered in chocolate.
- the movie Shrek 2

Clear? Huh. Why a four-year-old child
could understand this report.
Run out and find me a four-year-old child,
I can't make head or tail of it.
- the Groucho Marx movie Duck Soup

The food at this place is really terrible ...
and such small portions.
- the Woody Allen movie Annie Hall

My plan was to kiss her with every lip on my face.
- the movie Dead Men Don't Wear Plaid

Crazy is walking down the street
with half a cantaloupe on your head,
muttering; "I'm a hamster, I'm a hamster."
- the movie Spy Hard (1996)

The seaweed is always greener in somebody else's lake.
- the movie The Little Mermaid (1989)

I'm not talking about lust.
A woman in lust wants chocolate.
A woman in love wants diamonds.
- the movie How to Lose a Guy in 10 Days

I feel the need to express something,
but I don't know what it is I want to express.
- the movie Interiors

This town needs an enema.
- the movie Batman

I've become the person I've always hated, but I'm happier.
- the Woody Allen movie Celebrity

I have a very low threshold of death.
My doctor says I can't have bullets enter my body at any time.
- the Woody Allen movie Casino Royale

I read that you should never go out with someone
if you can think of three reasons why you shouldn't.
- the movie Bridget Jones: The Edge of Reason (2004)

What we've got here is failure to communicate.
- the movie Cool Hand Luke

EVERYONE has the right to make an ass out of themselves.
- Harold and Maude (The movie )

It's cookies, he smells like cookies,
and the smell gets stronger when he's in heat.
- the movie Michael

It's not the men in your life that counts,
it's the life in your men.
- Mae West, in the movie I'm No Angel

You want to do mankind a real service?
Tell funnier jokes.
- the Woody Allen movie Stardust Memories (1980)

I don't want to move to a city where the only cultural advantage
is being able to make a right turn on a red light.
- the Woody Allen movie Annie Hall

Barf: I'm a mog: half man, half dog. I'm my own best friend!
- the movie Spaceballs (1987)

The key is, to not think of death as an end,
but as more of a very effective way to cut down on your expenses.
- the movie Love and Death

The most important words in the English language
are not "I love you" but "It's benign."
- the Woody Allen movie Deconstructing Harry

Still, things could be a lot worse.
Oh, that's right... I'm falling to my death. Guess they can't.
- the movie Megamind (2010)

There's a couple of things they don't teach you
in Harvard Business School,
one is how to cope with defeat,
the other is how to handle a shotgun.
- The Simpsons Movie (2007)

Thank you, gentlemen. Someday I will repay you,
unless of course I can't find you, or if I forget.
- the movie Shrek 2

To you I'm an atheist; to God, I'm the Loyal Opposition.
- the Woody Allen movie Stardust Memories

It looks like we're up chocolate creek without a Popsicle stick!
- the movie Shrek 2 (2004)

I got a good mind to join a club
and beat you over the head with it.
- the Groucho Marx movie Duck Soup

Husbands should be like Kleenex:
soft, strong, and disposable.
- the movie Clue (1985)

I think you're the opposite of a paranoid.
I think you go around with the insane delusion that people like you.
- the Woody Allen movie Deconstructing Harry

No one can have a higher opinion of you than I have,
and I think you're a slimy, contemptible sewer rat!
- the movie The Great Mouse Detective

Frankly, I'm too scared to ask about the frog.
- the movie Tangled (2010)

When I first saw you, I thought you were handsome.
Then, of course, you spoke.
- the movie As Good As It Gets (1997)

Are we there yet? are we there yet? are we there yet?
- said by Donkey in the movie Shrek 2

Go ahead, make my day.
- the movie Sudden Impact (1983)

I can't stand a naked light bulb.
- the movie A Streetcar Named Desire

I've always believed that if done properly,
armed robbery doesn't have to be an unpleasant experience.
- the movie Thelma & Louise

Stay hopeless and confused. Keep polishing those skills.
- the movie When a Man Loves a Woman (1994)

Oh, Shrek. Don't worry.
Things just seem bad because it's dark and rainy
and Fiona's father hired a sleazy hitman to whack you.
- the movie Shrek 2

The time-traveling is just too dangerous.
Better that I devote myself to study
the other great mystery of the universe - women!
- the movie Back to the Future II

Mr. President, I'm not saying we wouldn't get our hair mussed.
But I do say no more than ten to twenty million killed, tops.
Uh, depending on the breaks.
- the movie Dr. Strangelove

You might have seen a housefly, maybe even a superfly,
but I bet you ain't never seen a DONKEY fly!
- the movie Shrek (2001)

Don't expect me to get excited over
another damn thing we need to find.
- Harry Potter and the Deathly Hallows: Part 1 (2010)

Where did you park the invisible car?
- the movie Megamind (2010)

Don't threaten me with a dead fish.
- the movie Withnail & I (1987)

The world's mental.
- the movie Harry Potter and the Deathly Hallows

She's been diagnosed as a paranoid hypochondriac.
Doctors think she may be faking.
- the movie Dead Men Don't Wear Plaid

You have to learn to push the guilt
under the rug and move on,
otherwise it overwhelms you.
- the Woody Allen movie Match Point

You know, it takes two to get one in trouble.
- the movie She Done Him Wrong (1933)

Yeah I called her up. She gave me a bunch of ...
about me not listening to her, or something.
I don't know, I wasn't really paying attention.
- the movie Dumb & Dumber (1994)

It happens - Sometimes.
- the movie Forrest Gump

Damn it boss, I like you too much not to say it.
You've got everything except one thing: madness!
- the movie Zorba The Greek

Gentlemen, you can't fight in here! This is the War Room.
- the movie Dr. Strangelove (1964)

DON'T get officious.
You're not yourself when you're officious -
That is the curse of a government job.
- the movie Harold and Maude (1971)


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May the world be kind to you,
and may your own thoughts be gentle upon yourself.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie


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