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Funny Deliver Quotes
Funny Quotes about Deliver

Let these funny Deliver Quotes from my large collection of funny quotes about life add a little humor to your day.

Do what you love, love what you do,
and deliver more than you promise.
- Harvey McKay

Opening my mind to Spirit, I trust my intuition to deliver
powerful visions of my inspired future.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie

I trust my intuition to deliver
powerful visions of my inspired future,
and I empower my intent to
transform those visions into reality.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie

I trust my intuition to deliver inspiring visions of my future.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie


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Dream with Powerful Vision:
I open my mind to Spirit,
and trust my intuition to deliver inspiring visions of my future.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie

I open my mind to Spirit, and trust my intuition
to deliver inspiring visions of my future.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie

If you have to have it, it's ego.
If you have to not have it, it's ego.
Hold life lightly and it will deliver what you need
and release what you don't.
- Alan Cohen


 

I decided that it was not wisdom that
enabled poets to write their poetry,
but a kind of instinct or inspiration,
such as you find in seers and prophets
who deliver all their sublime messages
without knowing in the least what they mean.
- Socrates

I Dream with Powerful Intention -
Opening my mind to Spirit, I trust my intuition
to deliver powerful visions of my inspired future,
and I empower my intent to transform those visions into reality.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie

I recognize the delivery of grace to my day,
even if I cannot identify a specific return address.
- Mary Anne Radmacher

Through humor, you can soften some
of the worst blows that life delivers.
And once you find laughter,
no matter how painful your situation might be,
you can survive it.
- Bill Cosby

If we fail to plan, we merely bob helplessly -
like a cork on the sea of life.
If we resist whatever life delivers to us,
we create untold misery for ourselves.
If we act with vision and commitment,
and then accept whatever Spirit provides,
we live a life of purpose and joy.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie

The LORD is my rock, and my fortress, and my deliverer;
my God, my strength, in whom I will trust.
- Psalm 18:2

As she passed among the hungry and the dejected,
delivering the rations and water,
she chanted in a low whisper,
"the spark of the mind - the sparkle of the soul" ...
"the spark of the mind - the sparkle of the soul" ...
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie

I give thanks for everything that has occurred
to bring me to this moment in time.
Every event that has ever occurred in my life
has played a crucial role in delivering me to this instant.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie

The wise man in the storm prays God,
not for safety from danger,
but for deliverance from fear.
It is the storm within which endangers him,
not the storm without.
- Ralph Waldo Emerson

The more he became truly wise,
the more he distrusted everything he knew.
- Voltaire

Religion is regarded by the common people as true,
by the wise as false, and by the rulers as useful.
- Lucius Annaeus Seneca

I was wise enough to never grow up
while fooling most people into believing I had.
- Margaret Mead

He who knows others is wise.
He who knows himself is enlightened.
- Lao Tzu

Before beginning a Hunt, it is wise to ask someone
what you are looking for before you begin looking for it.
- A. A. Milne (Winnie-The-Pooh)

Self-pity is our worst enemy
and if we yield to it,
we can never do anything wise in this world.
- Helen Keller

No matter how dull, or how mean, or how wise a man is,
he feels that happiness is his indisputable right.
- Helen Keller

Take risks: if you win, you will be happy;
if you lose, you will be wise.
- Anonymous

See no evil, Hear no evil, Speak no evil.
- Japanese pictorial maxim (the Three Wise Monkeys)

A wise girl kisses but doesn't love,
listens but doesn't believe,
and leaves before she is left.
- Marilyn Monroe

Everyone is wise, until he speaks.
- Irish proverb

Early to bed and early to rise,
makes a man healthy, wealthy, and wise.
- Benjamin Franklin

The wise ones fashioned speech with their thought,
sifting it as grain is sifted through a sieve.
- The Buddha

I have always been regretting that
I was not as wise as the day I was born.
- Henry David Thoreau

It is the nature of the wise to resist pleasures,
but the foolish to be a slave to them.
- Epictetus

The foolish man seeks happiness in the distance;
the wise grows it under his feet.
- J. Robert Oppenheimer

The wise man does not lay up his own treasures.
The more he gives to others, the more he has for his own.
- Lao Tzu

The wise man looks into space,
and does not regard the small as too little,
nor the great as too much;
for he knows that there is no limit to dimensions.
- Lao Tzu

Wise men put their trust in ideas
and not in circumstances
- Ralph Waldo Emerson

If you wish to succeed in life,
make perseverance your bosom friend,
experience your wise counselor,
caution your elder brother,
and hope your guardian genius.
- Joseph Addison

Neither a wise man nor a brave man lies down
on the tracks of history
to wait for the train of the future to run over him.
- Dwight D. Eisenhower

You can tell whether a man is clever by his answers.
You can tell whether a man is wise by his questions.
- Naguib Mahfouz

The two powers which in my opinion constitute a wise man
are those of bearing and forbearing.
- Epictetus

The wise man looks back into the past,
and does not grieve over what is far off,
nor rejoice over what is near;
for he knows that time is without end.
- Lao Tzu

A wise man can learn more from a foolish question
than a fool can learn from a wise answer.
- Bruce Lee

Before God we are all equally wise - and equally foolish.
- Albert Einstein

He is a wise man who does not grieve
for the things which he has not,
but rejoices for those which he has.
- Epictetus

It is always wise to look ahead,
but difficult to look further than you can see.
- Winston Churchill

A wise man hears one word and understands two.
- Yiddish Proverb

It is noted that a stopped clock is correct twice each day.
In a similar manner, a person who is unchanging appears wise occasionally.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie

It is a wise father that knows his own child.
- William Shakespeare

When you are winning a war
almost everything that happens
can be claimed to be right and wise.
- Winston Churchill

All this worldly wisdom was once
the unamiable heresy of some wise man.
- Henry David Thoreau

An optimist is a person who sees a green light everywhere,
while the pessimist sees only the red stoplight.
The truly wise person is colorblind.
- Albert Schweitzer

Many receive advice, only the wise profit from it.
- Publilius Syrus

A wise man will make haste to forgive,
because he knows the true value of time,
and will not suffer it to pass away in unnecessary pain.
- Samuel Johnson

A wise one said, "We are most like God when we forgive."
It is easy for us to blame, but hard for us to forgive.
Yet that is what we are called upon to do -
to forgive everyone for everything.
And the reward?
In this life, the reward for forgiveness
is your own happiness.
Unconditional universal forgiveness is
the key to your own happiness.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie

Every day is a new beginning -
a day for a new plan and new action.
If today, in conscious awareness, you choose
the same plan as yesterday, you are wise.
If you choose a different plan, you are equally wise.
Whatever you choose, choose with intention.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie

Excellence is the result of
caring more than others think wise,
risking more than other's think safe,
dreaming more than others think practical,
and expecting more than others think possible.
- Anonymous

A wise and frugal government,
which shall leave men free to regulate
their own pursuits of industry and improvement,
and shall not take from the mouth
of labor and the bread it has earned -
this is the sum of good government.
- Thomas Jefferson

Thoughtful people seldom share exactly the same opinion -
the same point-of-view.
The wise ones understand that they know nothing -
for virtually none of our experience is truly factual -
and they graciously honor all other opinions.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie

It cannot be wisdom to assert the truth of one faith over another.
In our troubled world so full of contradictions,
the wise person makes justice his guide and learns from all.
- Akbar the Great (1542-1605)

To be idle is a short road to death
and to be diligent is a way of life;
foolish people are idle,
wise people are diligent.
- The Buddha

Laws are sand, customs are rock.
Laws can be evaded and punishment escaped,
but an openly transgressed custom brings sure punishment.
The penalty may be unfair, unrighteous, illogical, and a cruelty;
no matter, it will be inflicted, just the same.
Certainly, then, there can be but one wise thing
for a visiting stranger to do -
find out what the country's customs are,
and refrain from offending against them.
- Mark Twain

Just when the caterpillar thought
the world was over, it became a butterfly.
- Anonymous

Some years ago I became president of Columbia University
and learned within 24 hours to be ready
to speak at the drop of a hat,
and I learned something more, the trustees were expected
to be ready to speak at the passing of the hat.
- Dwight D. Eisenhower

We did not change as we grew older;
we just became more clearly ourselves.
- Lynn Hall

A man who was completely innocent,
offered himself as a sacrifice for the good of others,
including his enemies,
and became the ransom of the world.
It was a perfect act.
- Mohandas (Mahatma) Gandhi

It ain't what you don't know that gets you into trouble.
It's what you know for sure that just ain't so.
- Mark Twain (attributed)

Oh, Shrek. Don't worry.
Things just seem bad because it's dark and rainy
and Fiona's father hired a sleazy hitman to whack you.
- the movie Shrek 2

Oh, if only God would give me some sign.
If He would just speak to me once. Anything.
One sentence. Two words. If He would just cough.
- the movie Love and Death

Will the people in the cheaper seats clap your hands?
And the rest of you, if you'll just rattle your jewelry.
- John Lennon

The time-traveling is just too dangerous.
Better that I devote myself to study
the other great mystery of the universe - women!
- the movie Back to the Future II

Getting divorced just because you don't love a man
is almost as silly as getting married just because you do.
- Zsa Zsa Gabor

A man likes his wife to be
just clever enough to appreciate his cleverness,
and just stupid enough to admire it.
- Israel Zangwill


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May the world be kind to you,
and may your own thoughts be gentle upon yourself.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie


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