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Funny Quotes about Life
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Funny Delicacy Quotes
Funny Quotes about Delicacy

Let these funny Delicacy Quotes from my large collection of funny quotes about life add a little humor to your day.

It is a wonderful advantage to a man,
in every pursuit or avocation,
to secure an adviser in a sensible woman.
In woman there is at once a subtle delicacy of tact,
and a plain soundness of judgement,
which are rarely combined to an equal degree in man.
A woman, if she be really your friend,
will have a sensitive regard for your character, honor, repute.
She will seldom counsel you to do a shabby thing:
for a woman friend always desires to be proud of you.
- Edward Bulwer-Lytton

Marriage is a wonderful institution,
but who would want to live in an institution?
- H. L. Mencken

Science is a wonderful thing
if one does not have to earn one's living at it.
- Albert Einstein

Do something wonderful, people may imitate it.
- Albert Schweitzer


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Might I perhaps win my wings?
I've been waiting for over 200 years now, sir,
and people ARE beginning to talk.
- It's a Wonderful Life (1946 movie)

Happy Birthday!
Today is YOUR day to Dance Lightly With Life.
Have a wonderful day.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie

We live in a wonderful world that is
full of beauty, charm and adventure.
There is no end to the adventures that we can have
if only we seek them with our eyes open.
- Jawaharlal Nehru


 

You have to leave the city of your comfort
and go into the wilderness of your intuition.
What you'll discover will be wonderful.
What you'll discover is yourself.
- Alan Alda

I'd rather have thirty minutes of wonderful
than a lifetime of nothing special.
- the movie Steel Magnolias

I say all that happens is wonderful.
- Anais Nin

Remember that not getting what you want
is sometimes a wonderful stroke of luck.
- Tenzin Gyatso, the 14th Dalai Lama

Determine never to be idle.
No person will have occasion to complain
of the want of time who never loses any.
It is wonderful how much may be done if we are always doing.
- Thomas Jefferson

I awakened. is that not a wonderful statement?
- Mary Anne Radmacher

To the lover of wilderness,
Alaska is one of the most wonderful countries in the world.
- John Muir

Not getting what you want
is sometimes a wonderful stroke of luck.
- Dalai Lama

A wonderful gift may not be wrapped as you expect
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie

Appreciation is a wonderful thing.
It makes what is excellent in others belong to us as well.
- Voltaire

It is wonderful to have Faith,
but don't confuse trust with being gullible.
Balance trust with conscious thought.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie

Each man's life touches so many other lives.
- It's a Wonderful Life (1946 movie)

How wonderful it is that nobody need wait a single moment
before starting to improve the world.
- Anne Frank

Life is lived in the mists -
little is fully visible, less is certain.
Yet rejoice in the unknowing,
and let all of life be a wonderful adventure.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie

Every time you hear a bell ring,
it means that some angel's just got his wings.
- It's a Wonderful Life (1946 movie)

It really does matter when we tell even the slightest untruth.
Even something as well intentioned as
telling someone their ill-finished
hair style looks wonderful will backfire -
certainly karmically, and usually practically.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie

God creates out of nothing. Wonderful you say.
Yes, to be sure, but he does what is still more wonderful:
he makes saints out of sinners.
- Soren Kierkegaard

Plant trees for your great-grandchildren -
for future generations.
Create the legacy of a better world.
Leave this world a better place than you found it.
Literally planting trees for
your great-grandchildren is a wonderful idea,
but far more important...
use this symbolism - this imagery -
to represent the kind of legacy
you want to leave to future generations.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie

It is wonderful how much time good people spend fighting the devil.
If they would only expend the same
amount of energy loving their fellow men,
the devil would die in his own tracks of ennui.
- Helen Keller

Dear Father in heaven, I'm not a praying man,
but if you're up there and you can hear me ...
show me the way... show me the way.
- It's a Wonderful Life (1946 movie)

The marvelous richness of human experience
would lose something of rewarding joy
if there were no limitations to overcome.
The hilltop hour would not be half so wonderful
if there were no dark valleys to traverse.
- Helen Keller

Today is a unique and special day.
It is unlike any other day you have ever experienced.
If you assume that today is like every other day,
you will never notice today's uniqueness.
If you practice keen awareness, you will get
to savor today's uniquely wonderful qualities.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie

I didn't want to marry anybody else in town.
I want my baby to look like you.
- It's a Wonderful Life (1946 movie)

Smile.
Today would be a wonderful day
not to take life so seriously.
Today may end up the way you prefer -
and it may not.
Happiness is not about being a winner -
it's about being gentle with life -
being gentle with yourself.
Let life be a dance,
and choose the kind of
dance you want for today -
perhaps a gentle loving dance.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie

It's wonderful to climb the liquid mountains of the sky.
Behind me and before me is God, and I have no fears.
- Helen Keller

Great relationships begin with two people who are each
self confident and who come to each other with the openness
to see and accept the other as a unique and wonderful person.
If there is true love and an alignment of fundamental values,
choose to join your life with your new partner
and vow never to criticize their nature -
the essence that makes them uniquely themselves.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie

Why does a woman work ten years to change a man's habits
and then complain that he's not the man she married?
- Barbra Streisand

I love being married.
It's so great to find that one special person
you want to annoy for the rest of your life.
- Rita Rudner

Marriage is a sort of friendship recognized by the police.
- Anonymous

Marriage is a fine institution -
but I'm not ready for an institution yet.
- Mae West

Marriage has no guarantees.
If that's what you're looking for,
go live with a car battery.
- Erma Bombeck

The secret of a happy marriage remains a secret.
- Henny Youngman

A man's friendships are, like his will,
invalidated by marriage -
but they are also no less invalidated
by the marriage of his friends.
- Samuel Butler

The four most important words in any marriage...
"I'll do the dishes."
- Anonymous

(Groom), take (Bride)'s hand and place your hand over hers.
Now, remember this moment and cherish it...
because this will be the last time you ever have the upper hand.
- Anonymous

They have come up with a perfect understanding.
He won't try to run her life,
and he won't try to run his, either.
- Anonymous

No man is truly married until he understands
every word his wife is NOT saying.
- Anonymous

In order to be happy with a man,
you must understand him a lot and love him a little.
To be happy with a woman, you must love her a lot
and not try to understand her at all.
- Helen Rowland

He's the kind of man a woman would have to marry to get rid of.
- Mae West

You never really know a man until you have divorced him.
- Zsa Zsa Gabor

Marriages don't last. When I meet a guy,
the first question I ask myself is:
is this the man I want my children to spend their weekends with?
- Rita Rudner

When I eventually met Mr. Right
I had no idea that his first name was Always.
- Rita Rudner

Never argue at the dinner table, for the one who is not hungry
always gets the best of the argument.
- Voltaire

It's not as great a day for the bride as she thinks.
She's not marrying the best man.
- Anonymous

The Wedding March always reminds me of the music
played when soldiers go into battle.
- Heinrich Heine

I have often wanted to drown my troubles,
but I can't get my wife to go swimming.
- Anonymous

Always remember the three magic words: You're right dear.
- Anonymous

There are four stages in a marriage.
First there's the affair,
then the marriage,
then children
and finally the fourth stage,
without which you cannot know a woman, the divorce.
- Norman Mailer

Do not marry a man to reform him.
That is what reform schools are for.
- Mae West

Never go to bed mad. Stay up and fight.
- Phyllis Diller

I was married by a judge.
I should have asked for a jury.
- Groucho Marx

I haven't reported my missing credit card to the police
because whoever stole it is spending less than my wife.
- Ilie Nastase

Getting divorced just because you don't love a man
is almost as silly as getting married just because you do.
- Zsa Zsa Gabor

When two people decide to get a divorce,
it isn't a sign that they "don't understand" one another,
but a sign that they have, at last, begun to.
- Helen Rowland

He early on let her know who is the boss.
He looked her right in the eye and clearly said, "You're the boss."
- Anonymous humor

A man is incomplete until he is married.
After that, he is finished.
- Zsa Zsa Gabor

Husbands should be like Kleenex:
soft, strong, and disposable.
- the movie Clue (1985)

One good Husband is worth two good Wives;
for the scarcer things are, the more they're valued.
- Benjamin Franklin

A man likes his wife to be
just clever enough to appreciate his cleverness,
and just stupid enough to admire it.
- Israel Zangwill

Whenever I date a guy, I think,
"Is this the man I want my children
to spend their weekends with?"
- Rita Rudner

Women marry men hoping they will change.
Men marry women hoping they will not.
- Albert Einstein

I think men who have a pierced ear
are better prepared for marriage.
They've experienced pain and bought jewelry.
- Rita Rudner

One should never know too precisely
whom one has married
- Friedrich Nietzsche

To keep your marriage brimming,
With love in the wedding cup,
Whenever you're wrong, admit it;
Whenever you're right, shut up.
- Ogden Nash


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May the world be kind to you,
and may your own thoughts be gentle upon yourself.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie


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