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Let these funny Cork Quotes from my large collection of funny quotes about life add a little humor to your day.
If we fail to plan, we merely bob helplessly -
like a cork on the sea of life.
If we resist whatever life delivers to us,
we create untold misery for ourselves.
If we act with vision and commitment,
and then accept whatever Spirit provides,
we live a life of purpose and joy.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie
Only those who dare to fail greatly can ever achieve greatly.
- Robert F. Kennedy
Pain is what the world inflicts upon us.
Suffering is our emotional reaction when we fail
to make the difficult conscious choice to choose Joy.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie
Act as if it were impossible to fail.
- Dorthea Brande
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Life is a process of becoming,
a combination of states we have to go through.
Where people fail is that they wish to elect a state
and remain in it. This is a kind of death.
- Anais Nin
It's not necessary to fear the prospect of failure
but to be determined not to fail.
- Jimmy Carter
Women must try to do things as men have tried.
When they fail their failure must be
but a challenge to others.
- Amelia Earhart
Men are born to succeed, not to fail.
- Henry David Thoreau
A man can fail many times,
but he isn't a failure until
he begins to blame somebody else.
- John Burroughs
Study nature, love nature,
stay close to nature. It will never fail you.
- Frank Lloyd Wright
In order to succeed, you must first be willing to fail.
- Anonymous
Failure to prepare is preparing to fail.
- John Wooden
When one door closes, another opens.
But often we look so long, so regretfully,
upon the closed door,
that we fail to see the one that is opened for us.
- Helen Keller
The crops were planted, tended, and harvested -
now the ground lies fallow, awaiting the new planting.
Did the year fail? I think not.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie
Where words fail, music speaks.
- Hans Christian Andersen
Every experiment, by multitudes or by individuals,
that has a sensual and selfish aim, will fail.
- Ralph Waldo Emerson
Failing to plan is planning to fail.
- Anonymous
A bend in the road is not the end of the road
unless you fail to make the turn.
- Anonymous
The probability that we may fail
in the struggle ought not to deter us
from the support of a cause we believe to be just.
- Abraham Lincoln
There may be times when we are powerless
to prevent injustice, but there must never
be a time when we fail to protest.
- Elie Wiesel
Only aim to do your duty,
and mankind will give you credit where you fail.
- Thomas Jefferson
Public sentiment is everything.
With public sentiment, nothing can fail.
Without it, nothing can succeed.
- Abraham Lincoln
All that is necessary to break the spell
of inertia and frustration is this:
Act as if it were impossible to fail.
- Dorthea Brande
What would you attempt to do if you knew you could not fail?
- Robert H. Schuller
You ARE what you do - and what you fail to do.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie
The majority of men meet with failure
because of their lack of persistence
in creating new plans to take
the place of those which fail.
- Napoleon Hill
More men fail through lack of purpose than lack of talent.
- Billy Sunday
If you fail to plan, you plan to fail.
- Anonymous
You may be disappointed if you fail,
but you are doomed if you don't try.
- Beverly Sills
Those that fail to learn from history
are doomed to repeat it.
- Winston Churchill
Try again. Fail again. Fail better.
- Samuel Beckett
People in their handlings of affairs
often fail when they are about to succeed.
If one remains as careful at the end
as he was at the beginning,
there will be no failure.
- Lao Tzu
Law and order exist for the purpose of establishing justice
and when they fail in this purpose
they become the dangerously structured dams
that block the flow of social progress.
- Martin Luther King, Jr.
Don't be too timid and squeamish about your actions.
All life is an experiment.
The more experiments you make the better.
What if they are a little coarse,
and you may get your coat soiled or torn?
What if you do fail, and get fairly rolled
in the dirt once or twice.
Up again, you shall never be so afraid of a tumble.
- Ralph Waldo Emerson
Can you achieve your goals?
You can't reach your goal if you haven't
defined your goals.
And you can't succeed if you don't try -
and then pick yourself up
and try again each time you fail.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie
Please know that I am aware of the hazards.
I want to do it because I want to do it.
Women must try to do things as men have tried.
When they fail, their failure must be a challenge to others.
- Amelia Earhart
The only thing to do with good advice is to pass it on.
It is never of any use to oneself.
- Oscar Wilde
The only fool bigger than the person who knows it all
is the person who argues with him.
- Stanislaw Jerszy Lec
Life is like jumping out of an airplane without a parachute -
only the last couple seconds are fatal,
but most people are scared to death the whole way down.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie
I don't want to move to a city where the only cultural advantage
is being able to make a right turn on a red light.
- the Woody Allen movie Annie Hall
Oh, if only God would give me some sign.
If He would just speak to me once. Anything.
One sentence. Two words. If He would just cough.
- the movie Love and Death
One good reason to only maintain a small circle of friends
is that three out of four murders
are committed by people who know the victim.
- George Carlin
You ask me if I keep a notebook
to record my great ideas.
I've only ever had one.
- Albert Einstein
Love is only a dirty trick played on us
to achieve continuation of the species.
- W. Somerset Maugham
The only thing that interferes with my learning is my education.
- Albert Einstein
The physician can bury his mistakes,
but the architect can only advise his client to plant vines -
so they should go as far as possible from home
to build their first buildings.
- Frank Lloyd Wright
Only two things are infinite,
the universe and human stupidity,
and I'm not sure about the former.
- Albert Einstein
The essence of all religions is one.
Only their approaches are different.
- Mohandas (Mahatma) Gandhi
Boys will be boys. And even that wouldn't matter
if only we could prevent girls from being girls.
- Anne Frank
Life would be infinitely happier if we could only be born
at the age of eighty and gradually approach eighteen.
- Mark Twain
I always pass on good advice.
It is the only thing to do with it.
It is never of any use to oneself.
- Oscar Wilde
A doctor can bury his mistakes
but an architect can only advise his clients to plant vines.
- Frank Lloyd Wright
Only dead fish swim with the stream.
- Anonymous
There are three hundred and sixty-four days
when you might get un-birthday presents,
and only one for birthday presents, you know.
- Lewis Carroll
There is no such thing as public opinion.
There is only published opinion.
- Winston Churchill
Politics is almost as exciting as war, and quite as dangerous.
In war you can only be killed once, but in politics many times.
- Winston Churchill
If you want total security, go to prison.
There you're fed, clothed, given medical care and so on.
The only thing lacking... is freedom.
- Dwight D. Eisenhower
Things may come to those who wait,
but only the things left by those who hustle.
- Abraham Lincoln
I've developed a new philosophy...
I only dread one day at a time.
- the character Charlie Brown in Charles M. Schulz' Peanuts comic
There is only one thing about which I am certain,
and that is that there is very little
about which one can be certain.
- W. Somerset Maugham
Nothing in life is to be feared.
It is only to be understood.
- Marie Curie
Magic is natural to Wizards,
and only a little harder for the rest of us.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie
I believe totally in a Capitalist System,
I only wish that someone would try it.
- Frank Lloyd Wright
The claim "I was only following orders" has been used
to justify too many tragedies in our history.
- Captain Picard of the television series
STAR TREK: The Next Generation
Human beings are the only creatures on the planet
who tell time and think they have to earn a living.
- Buckminster Fuller
The only true love is love at first sight;
second sight dispels it.
- Israel Zangwill
The attempt to combine wisdom and power
has only rarely been successful and then only for a short while.
- Albert Einstein
Only a fool tests the depth of the water with both feet.
- African Proverb
The only advantage of not being too good a housekeeper
is that your guests are so pleased
to feel how very much better they are.
- Eleanor Roosevelt
Advertisements contain the only truths
to be relied on in a newspaper.
- Thomas Jefferson
You are only young once,
but you can stay immature indefinitely.
- Anonymous
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May the world be kind to you,
and may your own thoughts be gentle upon yourself.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie
All materials & writings are copyright © Jonathan Lockwood Huie, except for quotes and other specifically identified material which belong to their respective copyright holders if applicable.