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Funny Quotes about Life
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Funny Connection Quotes
Funny Quotes about Connection

Let these funny Connection Quotes from my large collection of funny quotes about life add a little humor to your day.

When someone has a strong intuitive connection,
Buddhism suggests that it's because of karma,
some past connection.
- Richard Gere

Our life is composed greatly from dreams, from the unconscious,
and they must be brought into connection with action.
They must be woven together.
- Anais Nin

The primal rhythmic power
and resonant sound of waves on the shore
are like the earth's heartbeat,
and become our connection with the body of nature.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie

I celebrate both my uniqueness
and my connection with all that is.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie


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Our connection with Spirit is unbreakable, but often imperceptible.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie

I am a Unique Expression
of the Universal Fabric of Creation.
I celebrate both my uniqueness
and my connection with all that is.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie

Humankind has not woven the web of life.
We are but one thread within it.
Whatever we do to the web, we do to ourselves.
All things are bound together.
All things connect.
- Chief Seattle


 

If what is seen and experienced is portrayed
in the language of logic,
we are engaged in science.
If it is communicated through forms
whose connections are not accessible
to the conscious mind but are
recognized intuitively as meaningful,
then we are engaged in art.
- Albert Einstein

You can create miracles in your own life,
and in the lives of those around you -
because you are a miracle,
and you are connected to the source of all miracles.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie

May You Always Be Connected With Earth and Sky -
Drawing Energy From Both.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie

We are all connected in the great Circle of Life.
- the movie The Lion King

Achievement seems to be connected with action.
Successful men and women keep moving.
They make mistakes, but they don't quit.
- Conrad Hilton

It is remarkable how closely the history of the apple tree
is connected with that of man.
- Henry David Thoreau

Success seems to be connected with action.
Successful people keep moving.
They make mistakes, but they don't quit.
- Conrad Hilton

AUM, the most primordial human sound -
and the sound most connected to Spirit,
is pronounced in these three parts:
A (as in mama) - a throat sound
that vibrates in the abdomen - signifies waking.
U (as in who) - a tongue sound
that vibrates in the chest - signifies dreaming.
M (as in mama) - a lip sound
that vibrates in the head - signifies sleeping.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie

We are all connected to everyone and everything in the universe.
Therefore, everything one does as an individual affects the whole.
All thoughts, words, images, prayers, blessings,
and deeds are listened to by all that is.
- Serge Kahili King

Don't go around saying the world owes you a living;
the world owes you nothing; it was here first.
- Mark Twain

I love being married.
It's so great to find that one special person
you want to annoy for the rest of your life.
- Rita Rudner

It ain't what you don't know that gets you into trouble.
It's what you know for sure that just ain't so.
- Mark Twain (attributed)

However beautiful the strategy,
you should occasionally look at the results.
- Winston Churchill

If you do what you've always done,
you'll get what you always got.
- Mark Twain

If you are not one of us, you are one of them.
- the movie The Matrix (1999)

Be careful not to do your good deeds
when there's no one watching you.
- Tom Lehrer

Yesterday is like a dung heap;
you can complain about the smell,
or you can use it to fertilize tomorrow's garden.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie

Give a man one rabbit, and he will eat for a day;
give a man two rabbits, and he will
feed his family and his neighbors
and return you 64,768 rabbits in change.
- Anonymous

When I first saw you, I thought you were handsome.
Then, of course, you spoke.
- the movie As Good As It Gets (1997)

He early on let her know who is the boss.
He looked her right in the eye and clearly said, "You're the boss."
- Anonymous humor

One great thing about getting old is that
you can get out of all sorts of social obligations
just by saying you're too tired.
- George Carlin

You can lead a man to Congress,
but you can't make him think.
- Milton Berle

A friend is someone who will bail you out of jail.
A best friend is the one sitting next
to you saying "boy was that fun."
- The Maugles

In order to be happy with a man,
you must understand him a lot and love him a little.
To be happy with a woman, you must love her a lot
and not try to understand her at all.
- Helen Rowland

And you just gotta remember, Sparky -
no matter what they tell you - you can NEVER have too much sugar.
- the movie Michael (1996)

You have to learn to push the guilt
under the rug and move on,
otherwise it overwhelms you.
- the Woody Allen movie Match Point

Half the people you know are below average.
- Anonymous

Will the people in the cheaper seats clap your hands?
And the rest of you, if you'll just rattle your jewelry.
- John Lennon

When your friends begin to flatter
you on how young you look,
it's a sure sign you're getting old.
- Mark Twain

When you are courting a nice girl
an hour seems like a second.
When you sit on a red-hot cinder
a second seems like an hour.
That's relativity.
- Albert Einstein

There are two things that are more difficult
than making an after-dinner speech:
climbing a wall which is leaning toward you
and kissing a girl who is leaning away from you.
- Winston Churchill

Where did you park the invisible car?
- the movie Megamind (2010)

You'll live to be a hundred if you give up
all the things that make you want to.
- the movie Interiors

I read that you should never go out with someone
if you can think of three reasons why you shouldn't.
- the movie Bridget Jones: The Edge of Reason (2004)

You're already a bastard.
Might as well be an enlightened one.
- the movie Simon Birch

Gentlemen, you can't fight in here! This is the War Room.
- the movie Dr. Strangelove (1964)

If you don't know where you are going,
you might wind up someplace else.
- Yogi Berra

If love is the answer,
could you please rephrase the question.
- Lily Tomlin

You know what? Maybe there's a good reason
donkeys shouldn't talk.
- the movie Shrek (2001)

Afraid? Me? A man who's licked
his weight in wild caterpillars?
Afraid? You bet I'm afraid!
- Groucho Marx

You know, it takes two to get one in trouble.
- the movie She Done Him Wrong (1933)

You ask me if I keep a notebook
to record my great ideas.
I've only ever had one.
- Albert Einstein

You might have seen a housefly, maybe even a superfly,
but I bet you ain't never seen a DONKEY fly!
- the movie Shrek (2001)

Oh, Shrek. Don't worry.
Things just seem bad because it's dark and rainy
and Fiona's father hired a sleazy hitman to whack you.
- the movie Shrek 2

The proper office of a friend is to side with you
when you are in the wrong.
Nearly anybody will side with you when you are in the right.
- Mark Twain

To keep your marriage brimming,
With love in the wedding cup,
Whenever you're wrong, admit it;
Whenever you're right, shut up.
- Ogden Nash

A friend will tell you she saw your old boyfriend -
and he's a priest.
- Erma Bombeck

To you I'm an atheist; to God, I'm the Loyal Opposition.
- the Woody Allen movie Stardust Memories

Of all the things that could frighten you,
you worry about my driving?
- Edward, from Twilight saga by Stephenie Meyer

Tragedy is when I cut my finger.
Comedy is when you fall into an open sewer and die.
- Mel Brooks

Marriage has no guarantees.
If that's what you're looking for,
go live with a car battery.
- Erma Bombeck

You never really know a man until you have divorced him.
- Zsa Zsa Gabor

If at first you don't succeed,
skydiving is not for you.
- Anonymous

Life's like Vegas. You're up, you're down,
but in the end the house always wins.
Doesn't mean you didn't have fun.
- the Woody Allen movie Deconstructing Harry

A friend doesn't go on a diet because you are fat.
- Erma Bombeck

Getting divorced just because you don't love a man
is almost as silly as getting married just because you do.
- Zsa Zsa Gabor

There's a couple of things they don't teach you
in Harvard Business School,
one is how to cope with defeat,
the other is how to handle a shotgun.
- The Simpsons Movie (2007)

The most important words in the English language
are not "I love you" but "It's benign."
- the Woody Allen movie Deconstructing Harry

No one can have a higher opinion of you than I have,
and I think you're a slimy, contemptible sewer rat!
- the movie The Great Mouse Detective

A relationship, I think, is like a shark.
You know? It has to constantly move forward or it dies.
And I think what we got on our hands is a dead shark.
- the Woody Allen movie Annie Hall (1977)

Now, if you don't mind, I'd appreciate it if you could lower your wand.
- the movie Harry Potter and the Prisoner of Azkaban

I think you're the opposite of a paranoid.
I think you go around with the insane delusion that people like you.
- the Woody Allen movie Deconstructing Harry

Damn it boss, I like you too much not to say it.
You've got everything except one thing: madness!
- the movie Zorba The Greek

I don't like to commit myself about heaven and hell -
you see, I have friends in both places.
- Mark Twain


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May the world be kind to you,
and may your own thoughts be gentle upon yourself.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie


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All materials & writings are copyright © Jonathan Lockwood Huie, except for quotes and other specifically identified material which belong to their respective copyright holders if applicable.