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Funny Come Quotes
Funny Quotes about Come

Let these funny Come Quotes from my large collection of funny quotes about life add a little humor to your day.

All our dreams can come true,
if we have the courage to pursue them.
- Walt Disney

Oh, come on, Shrek, wake up and smell the pheromones!
- the movie Shrek (2001)

If truth is beauty, how come no one has their hair done in the library?
- Lily Tomlin

They have come up with a perfect understanding.
He won't try to run her life,
and he won't try to run his, either.
- Anonymous


 

If you come to a fork in the road, take it.
- Yogi Berra

The will to believe chases out the rational mind,
whenever and wherever the two come into conflict.
- Philip K. Dick

"The time has come," the walrus said, "to talk of many things:
of shoes and ships - and sealing wax - of cabbages and kings."
- Lewis Carroll


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Sometimes I lie awake at night and ask "Why me?"
Then a voice answers "Nothing personal,
your name just happened to come up. -
- Charlie Brown, in Charles M. Schulz' cartoon Peanuts

The only good thing ever to come out of religion was the music.
- George Carlin

Things may come to those who wait,
but only the things left by those who hustle.
- Abraham Lincoln

In spite of unseasonable wind, snow
and unexpected weather of all sorts -
a gardener still plants.
And tends what they have planted ...
believing that Spring will come.
- Mary Anne Radmacher

The traveler sees what he sees,
the tourist sees what he has come to see.
- Gilbert K. Chesterton

We must be willing to get rid of the life we've planned,
so as to have the life that is waiting for us.
The old skin has to be shed before the new one can come.
- Joseph Campbell

Clouds come floating into my life,
no longer to carry rain or usher storm,
but to add color to my sunset sky.
- Rabindranath Tagore

Those who have come here to hate should leave now;
for in their hate, they only betray themselves.
- Terry Goodkind

Take the initiative - don't wait for life to come to you.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie

Youth, large, lusty, loving -
Youth, full of grace, force, fascination.
Do you know that Old Age may come after you
with equal grace, force, fascination?
- Walt Whitman

The secret of making dreams come true
can be summarized in four C's.
They are Curiosity, Confidence, Courage, and Constancy;
and the greatest of these is Confidence.
- Walt Disney

The fastest way to destroy love
is to make a goal out of it,
because people who are trying to be loved
come from a place that they're not loved.
- Werner Erhard

When you're drowning, you don't say,
"I would be incredibly pleased if someone
would have the foresight to notice
me drowning and come and help me,"
you just scream.
- John Lennon

You can't stay in your corner of the Forest waiting for others to come to you.
You have to go to them sometimes.
- A. A. Milne (Winnie-The-Pooh)

From the deepest desires often come the deadliest hate.
- Socrates

Being angry is as close as a human being
can come to experiencing hell on earth.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie

Don't ask yourself what the world needs;
ask yourself what makes you come alive.
And then go and do that.
Because what the world needs is people who have come alive.
- Howard Thurman

If I keep a green bough in my heart the singing bird will come.
- Chinese proverb

We come nearest to the great
when we are great in humility.
- Rabindranath Tagore

The earth is like a spaceship
that didn't come with an operating manual.
- R. Buckminster Fuller

Lawsuit: A machine which you go into as a pig and come out of as a sausage.
- Ambrose Bierce

Success doesn't come to you, you go to it.
- Marva Collins

We come to love not by finding the perfect person,
but by learning to see an imperfect person perfectly.
- Angelina Jolie

Wisdom doesn't necessarily come with age.
Sometimes age just shows up all by itself.
- Tom Wilson

Banks have a new image.
Now you have 'a friend,' your friendly banker.
If the banks are so friendly, how come they chain down the pens?
- Alan King

If you tell a lie big enough and keep repeating it,
people will eventually come to believe it.
- Joseph Goebbels (Minister of Propaganda in Nazi Germany)

I come from a family where gravy is considered a beverage.
- Erma Bombeck

You couldn't have fed the '50s into a computer and come out with the '60s.
- Paul Kantner

Have you ever hugged a tree?
Hug a tree, and one day you will come to know
that it is not only that
you have hugged the tree
but that the tree also responds,
the tree also hugs you.
- Osho

War will never cease until babies begin to come into
the world with larger cerebrums and smaller adrenal glands.
- H. L. Mencken

If you build it, he will come.
- the movie Field of Dreams

Happiness does not come from doing easy work but from
the afterglow of satisfaction that comes after the
achievement of a difficult task that demanded our best.
- Theodore Isaac Rubin

There is only one difference between a long life and a good dinner:
that,
in the dinner, the sweets come last.
- Robert Louis Stevenson

The sun WILL come up tomorrow.
- Anonymous

As long as one keeps searching, the answers come.
- Joan Baez

Come live in my heart, and pay no rent.
- Samuel Lover

Reverse every natural instinct and do the opposite
of what you are inclined to do,
and you will probably come very close to having a perfect golf swing.
- Ben Hogan

Without this playing with fantasy,
no creative work has ever yet come to birth.
The debt we owe to the play of
the imagination is incalculable.
- Carl Jung

Good buildings come from good people,
ad all problems are solved by good design.
- Stephen Gardiner

The artist is a receptacle for emotions that come from all over the place:
from the sky,
from the earth, from a scrap of paper,
from a passing shape, from a spider's web.
- Pablo Picasso

Strength does not come from physical capacity.
It comes from an indomitable will.
- Mohandas (Mahatma) Gandhi

I look forward to these confrontations with the press
to kind of balance up the nice and pleasant things
that come to me as president.
- Jimmy Carter

When I examine myself and my methods of thought,
I come to the conclusion that the gift of fantasy
has meant more to me than
any talent for absorbing positive knowledge.
- Albert Einstein

For every person who has ever lived there has come,
at last, a spring he will never see.
Glory then in the springs that are yours.
- Pam Brown

We tend to forget that happiness doesn't
come as a result of getting something we don't have,
but rather of recognizing and appreciating what we do have.
- Frederick Koenig

Clocks slay time...
time is dead as long as it is being clicked off by little wheels;
only when the clock stops does time come to life.
- William Faulkner

The WAY is Not The Way for You,
Unless You Come With an Open Mind,
Clean Hands, and a Loving Heart.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie

Nirvana is not the blowing out of the candle.
It is the extinguishing of the flame because day is come.
- Rabindranath Tagore

Whatever America hopes to bring to pass in the world
must first come to pass in the heart of America.
- Dwight D. Eisenhower

One who comes to the Court must come to adore,
not to protest.
That's the new gloss on the 1st Amendment.
- William O. Douglas

The way to do fieldwork is never to
come up for air until it is all over.
- Margaret Mead

When people speak to you about a preventive war,
you tell them to go fight it.
After my experience, I have come to hate war.
War settles nothing.
- Dwight D. Eisenhower

When we come into the present,
we begin to feel the life around us again,
but we also encounter whatever we have been avoiding.
We must have the courage to face whatever is present -
our pain, our desires, our grief,
our loss, our secret hopes our love -
everything that moves us most deeply.
- Jack Kornfield

"Begin at the beginning," the King said, very gravely,
"and go on till you come to the end: then stop."
- Lewis Carroll

Come forth into the light of things,
let nature be your teacher.
- William Wordsworth

When I am abroad, I always make it a rule never to
criticize or attack the government of my own country.
I make up for lost time when I come home.
- Winston Churchill

I believe cats to be spirits come to earth.
A cat, I am sure, could walk on a cloud without coming through.
- Jules Verne

Well, when you come down to it,
I don't see that a reporter could do much to a president, do you?
- Dwight D. Eisenhower

We may have all come on different ships,
but we're in the same boat now.
- Martin Luther King, Jr.

If it's natural to kill, how come men have to go into training to learn how?
- Joan Baez

You don't have to go looking for love when it's where you come from.
- Werner Erhard

My greatest Power and my greatest Inner Peace come
when I Intend my future, and when I avoid Expecting it.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie

Sometime they'll give a war and nobody will come.
- Carl Sandburg

Even a happy life cannot be without a measure of darkness,
and the word happy would lose its meaning
if it were not balanced by sadness.
It is far better take things as they come along
with patience and equanimity.
- Carl Jung


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- Jonathan Lockwood Huie

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All materials & writings are copyright © Jonathan Lockwood Huie, except for quotes and other specifically identified material which belong to their respective copyright holders if applicable.