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Let these funny Cities Quotes from my large collection of funny quotes about life add a little humor to your day.
When we get piled upon one another
in large cities, as in Europe,
we shall become as corrupt as Europe.
- Thomas Jefferson
I don't want to move to a city where the only cultural advantage
is being able to make a right turn on a red light.
- the Woody Allen movie Annie Hall
Happiness is having a large, loving, caring,
close-knit family in another city.
- George Burns
New York City is a great monument
to the power of money and greed...
a race for rent.
- Frank Lloyd Wright
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Washington is a city of
Southern efficiency and Northern charm.
- John F. Kennedy
You have to leave the city of your comfort
and go into the wilderness of your intuition.
What you'll discover will be wonderful.
What you'll discover is yourself.
- Alan Alda
THE fog comes
on little cat feet.
It sits looking
over harbor and city
on silent haunches
and then moves on.
- Carl Sandburg
We are all one whether we dine on corned beef in New York City,
black-eyed peas and cornbread in rural Louisiana,
or roast guinea pig in Peru.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie
To look at the cross-section of any plan of a big city
is to look at something like the section of a fibrous tumor.
- Frank Lloyd Wright
If we tire of the saints,
Shakespeare is our city of refuge.
- Ralph Waldo Emerson
A city is a place where there is no need to
wait for next week to get the answer to a question,
to taste the food of any country,
to find new voices to listen to and familiar ones to listen to again.
- Margaret Mead
I love being married.
It's so great to find that one special person
you want to annoy for the rest of your life.
- Rita Rudner
Men always want to be a woman's first love -
women like to be a man's last romance.
- Oscar Wilde
You'll live to be a hundred if you give up
all the things that make you want to.
- the movie Interiors
Marriage is a wonderful institution,
but who would want to live in an institution?
- H. L. Mencken
You want to do mankind a real service?
Tell funnier jokes.
- the Woody Allen movie Stardust Memories (1980)
I want to thank my parents for everything I am today -
fat, miserable, and paranoid.
- Anonymous
Here's a toast to your new bride who has everything a girl
could want in her life, except for good taste in men.
- Anonymous
Marriages don't last. When I meet a guy,
the first question I ask myself is:
is this the man I want my children to spend their weekends with?
- Rita Rudner
Whenever I date a guy, I think,
"Is this the man I want my children
to spend their weekends with?"
- Rita Rudner
I feel the need to express something,
but I don't know what it is I want to express.
- the movie Interiors
You want a friend in Washington? Get a dog.
- Harry S. Truman
My boyfriend and I broke up.
He wanted to get married and I didn't want him to.
- Rita Rudner
Women want mediocre men,
and men are working to be as mediocre as possible.
- Margaret Mead
Take time to play!
Ask for what you want.
Laugh.
Live loudly.
Be avid.
Learn a new thing.
Be Yourself!
- Mary Anne Radmacher
If you want total security, go to prison.
There you're fed, clothed, given medical care and so on.
The only thing lacking... is freedom.
- Dwight D. Eisenhower
The third certainty of life, after death and taxes,
is that nothing will work out the way you want.
Life is fully as bad as you think it is.
Choose to live joyfully anyway.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie
I want a girl just like good old mom,
who is different in every way.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie
Confused Memories of Childhood:
Hate to my father, cruel hate,
confused with love - a mix not great.
The man I love - the man I hate;
the man I want to emulate.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie
"But I don't want to go among mad people," said Alice.
"Oh, you can't help that," said the cat. "We're all mad here."
- Lewis Carroll
When I want to be bold about my movement ...
I for sure do not call it exercise!
- Mary Anne Radmacher
Experience is what you get when you don't get what you want.
- Dan Stanford
Mothers all want their sons to grow up to be president,
but they don't want them to become politicians in the process.
- John F. Kennedy
How do you want to be remembered?
Live life full out - Begin today.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie
Decide that you want it more than you are afraid of it.
- Bill Cosby
People who want to share their religious views with you
almost never want you to share yours with them.
- Dave Barry
If you want to make enemies,
try to change something.
- Woodrow Wilson
I want to be the white man's brother, not his brother-in-law.
- Martin Luther King, Jr.
I would never want to be a member of a group
whose symbol was a man nailed to two pieces of wood.
- George Carlin
Too many people spend money they haven't earned,
to buy things they don't want,
to impress people they don't like.
- Will Rogers
The jump is so frightening
between where I am,
and where I want to be.
Because of all I may become,
I will close my eyes and leap.
- Mary Anne Radmacher
Law of Contrariness:
Our chief want in life is somebody
who shall make us do what we can.
Having found them, we shall then hate them for it.
- Ralph Waldo Emerson
People are stupid;
given proper motivation, almost anyone will believe almost anything.
Because people are stupid, they will believe a lie
because they want to believe it's true,
or because they are afraid it might be true.
- Terry Goodkind
If you want to make peace with your enemy,
you have to work with your enemy.
Then he becomes your partner.
- Nelson Mandela
Nearly all men can stand adversity,
but if you want to test a man's character, give him power.
- Abraham Lincoln
If you want to be happy, be.
- Leo Tolstoy
The way I see it, if you want the rainbow,
you gotta put up with the rain.
- Dolly Parton
If you want to do it,
Do It - TODAY.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie
Religion has convinced people that there's an invisible man
... living in the sky. Who watches everything you do
every minute of every day. And the invisible man
has a list of ten specific things he doesn't want you to do.
And if you do any of these things,
he will send you to a special place, of burning and fire
and smoke and torture and anguish for you to live forever,
and suffer, and suffer, and burn, and scream,
until the end of time. But he loves you. He loves you.
He loves you and he needs money.
- George Carlin
Dream up the world you want to live in. Dream out loud.
- Bono
Those that want friends to open themselves unto
are cannibals of their own hearts.
- Francis Bacon
You know you love someone when you know
you want them to be happy,
even if their happiness means
that you are not a part of it.
- Anonymous
Intolerance betrays want of faith in one's cause.
- Mohandas (Mahatma) Gandhi
Getting old is a fascination thing.
The older you get, the older you want to get.
- Ralph Waldo Emerson
Naturally, the common people don't want war ...
but after all it is the leaders of a country who determine the policy,
and it is always a simple matter to drag the people along,
whether it is a democracy, or a fascist dictatorship,
or a parliament, or a communist dictatorship.
Voice or no voice, the people can always be brought
to the bidding of the leaders.
That is easy. All you have to do is tell them
they are being attacked,
and denounce the pacifists for lack of patriotism
and exposing the country to danger.
It works the same in every country.
- Hermann Goering
Never say goodbye when you still want to try,
never give up when you still feel you can't take it.
Never say you don't love the person anymore
when you can't let go.
- Anonymous
We only see what we want to see,
and hear what we want to hear
- don Miguel Ruiz
No one is in control of your happiness but you;
therefore, you have the power to change anything
about yourself or your life that you want to change.
- Barbara De Angelis
Most of us are prisoners of habit,
and don't even notice that we do the same things,
think the same things, want the same things each day -
mostly without conscious thought.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie
Just because an animal is large, it doesn't mean he doesn't want kindness;
however big Tigger seems to be, remember that he wants as much kindness as Roo.
- A. A. Milne (Winnie-The-Pooh)
It's my party and I'll cry if I want to.
- Leslie Gore
The moment we want to believe something,
we suddenly see all the arguments for it,
and become blind to the arguments against it.
- George Bernard Shaw
Attention is the ability we have to discriminate
and to focus only on that which we want to perceive.
- don Miguel Ruiz
We believe whatever we want to believe.
- Demosthenes
Whatever you want in life, start today.
Not tomorrow - today.
Let it be a small beginning - a tiny beginning.
Your happiness depends on starting today - every day.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie
If we want to direct our lives,
we must take control of our consistent actions.
It's not what we do once in a while that shapes our lives,
but what we do consistently.
- Anthony Robbins
What you want is irrelevant,
what you have chosen is at hand.
- Spock character in Star Trek VI movie
I want you to be concerned about your next door neighbor.
Do you know your next door neighbor?
- Mother Teresa
Freedom makes a huge requirement of every human being.
With freedom comes responsibility.
For the person who is unwilling to grow up,
the person who does not want to carry is own weight,
this is a frightening prospect.
- Eleanor Roosevelt
Take time to contemplate -
away from the opinions and influence of others -
what you really want
and what you believe to be important in your life.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie
If you don't know what you want, you will probably never get it.
- Oliver Wendell Holmes, Jr.
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May the world be kind to you,
and may your own thoughts be gentle upon yourself.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie
All materials & writings are copyright © Jonathan Lockwood Huie, except for quotes and other specifically identified material which belong to their respective copyright holders if applicable.