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Let these funny Bust Quotes from my large collection of funny quotes about life add a little humor to your day.
Mind Chatter...
"I'm too fat; I'm too thin; and my hair is a fright;
And I'm never enough; and my world is not right;
I'm not smart; I'm not cute; I'm not strong; I'm a bust
I earn scorn; I earn hate; I'm no good; I disgust."
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie
The holiday season promotes
a heightened sense of community.
It draws our chins up and
helps us look above and over
the limiting fence of our own events,
activities and preoccupations.
The opportunity for a heroic gesture
can tap you quietly on the shoulder
in the midst of a holiday bustle.
If you are attentive,
you will notice the gentle touch
and will be able to respond. Remember...
There are no small acts of kindness.
Every compassionate act makes large the world.
- Mary Anne Radmacher
The best of all gifts around any Christmas tree
is the presence of a happy family all wrapped up in each other.
- Burton Hills
What if Christmas, he thought, doesn't come from a store.
What if Christmas, perhaps, means a little bit more.
- Dr. Seuss
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A holiday, the day I first named you, "friend."
- Mary Anne Radmacher
Every day is a good day to make a resolution
for beginning a new way of living,
but the New Year's Day holiday provides a good focus
for reviewing our lives and resolving
to live each day with conscious attention.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie
For me, one of the greatest things about living in the United States
is that we have a national holiday - Thanksgiving Day -
dedicated to honoring gratitude.
Having gratitude is one of the keys to a happy life.
Let every day be a day of profound thanksgiving.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie
I think one of the finest gifts I can give
my friends in the holiday season is to pause
with a long enough quality to actually SEE them.
My calm, unhurried presence communicates
this gift of a message, "I see you. I recognize you.
I remember our times of together
and am contributing right now to another quality memory.
I value you and honor and take the time,
right this moment to pause long enough to truly notice you."
- Mary Anne Radmacher
Honesty is the best policy - when there is money in it.
- Mark Twain
A friend is someone who will bail you out of jail.
A best friend is the one sitting next
to you saying "boy was that fun."
- The Maugles
My wife ran off with my best friend, and I sure do miss him.
- Anonymous
It's not as great a day for the bride as she thinks.
She's not marrying the best man.
- Anonymous
I am easily satisfied with the very best.
- Winston Churchill
Never argue at the dinner table, for the one who is not hungry
always gets the best of the argument.
- Voltaire
Barf: I'm a mog: half man, half dog. I'm my own best friend!
- the movie Spaceballs (1987)
Outside of a dog, a book is man's best friend.
Inside of a dog, it's too dark to read.
- Groucho Marx
Look your best - who said love is blind?
- Mae West
Contrary to general belief,
I do not believe that friends are necessarily
the people you like best,
they are merely the people who got there first.
- Peter Ustinov
Knowing your own darkness is the best method
for dealing with the darknesses of other people.
- Carl Jung
The age of a woman doesn't mean a thing.
The best tunes are played on the oldest fiddles.
- Ralph Waldo Emerson
The best way to appreciate your job
is to imagine yourself without one.
- Oscar Wilde
Short words are best
and the old words, when short, are best of all.
- Winston Churchill
Speak when you are angry -
and you will make the best speech you'll ever regret.
- Laurence J. Peter
The best argument against democracy is
a five-minute conversation with the average voter.
- Winston Churchill
We have the best government that money can buy.
- Mark Twain
That's what Tiggers do best!
- A. A. Milne (Winnie-The-Pooh)
The best remedy for a short temper is a long walk.
- Jacqueline Schiff
For those who do not think,
it is best at least to rearrange
their prejudices once in a while.
- Luther Burbank
Most people enjoy the inferiority of their best friends.
- Lord Chesterfield
When you have got an elephant by the hind legs
and he is trying to run away, it's best to let him run.
- Abraham Lincoln
Heaven must be an awfully dull place
if your best friends end up elsewhere.
- Anonymous
The best thing about the future is
that it comes one day at a time.
- Abraham Lincoln
Common looking people are the best in the world:
that is the reason the Lord makes so many of them.
- Abraham Lincoln
A common denominator of all religions is that
they have the power to bring out the best and the worst in people.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie
Testing oneself is best when done alone.
- Jimmy Carter
Honesty may be the best policy,
but it's important to remember that apparently, by elimination,
dishonesty is the second-best policy.
- George Carlin
If you refuse to accept anything but the best,
you very often get it.
- Somerset Maugham
Life is best when I wish neither to hurry the future nor to slow it.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie
To know yet to think that one does not know is best;
Not to know yet to think that one knows
will lead to difficulty.
- Lao Tzu
Simply do your best, and you will avoid
self-judgment, self-abuse and regret.
- don Miguel Ruiz
Tolerance is the first principle of community;
it is the spirit which conserves
the best that all men think.
- Helen Keller
Best Friends: we're a parade - even by ourselves!
- Mary Anne Radmacher
You may call God love, you may call God goodness.
But the best name for God is compassion.
- Meister Eckhart
The most erroneous stories are those
we think we know best -
and therefore never scrutinize or question.
- Stephen Jay Gould
Know the best and highest choices for health
and more often choose those things.
- Mary Anne Radmacher
The best bridge between despair and hope is a good night's sleep.
- E. Joseph Cossman
If we like what we do, if we always do our best,
then we are really enjoying life.
We are having fun, we don't get bored,
we don't have frustrations.
- don Miguel Ruiz
There is some good in the worst of us
and some evil in the best of us.
When we discover this,
we are less prone to hate our enemies.
- Martin Luther King, Jr.
I believe that a simple and unassuming manner of life
is best for everyone, best both for the body and the mind.
- Albert Einstein
You have to accept whatever comes
and the only important thing is that you meet it with courage
and with the best that you have to give.
- Eleanor Roosevelt
It's a funny thing about life;
if you refuse to accept anything but the best,
you very often get it.
- W. Somerset Maugham
The best way to gain self-confidence
is to do what you are afraid to do.
- Anonymous
The only way to get the best of an argument is to avoid it.
- Dale Carnegie
The best remedy for those who are afraid, lonely or unhappy
is to go outside, somewhere where they can be quiet,
alone with the heavens, nature and God.
Because only then does one feel that all is as it should be.
- Anne Frank
Today is a day to cover your best weapons in velvet.
Go gently into the world.
Hold your anger.
Keep your competitive spirit in check.
Some day you will need your fierce weapons,
but not today.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie
Infinite striving to be the best is man's duty;
it is its own reward.
Everything else is in God's hands.
- Mohandas (Mahatma) Gandhi
I have lost my seven best friends,
which is to say that God has had mercy on me
seven times without realizing it.
He lent a friendship, took it from me, and sent me another.
- Jean Cocteau
The best way to predict the future is to create it.
- Peter F. Drucker
Be prepared for life -
to live happily and without regret,
knowing that you have done your best.
- the Boy Scout Handbook
Laughter is not at all a bad beginning for a friendship,
and it is far the best ending for one.
- Oscar Wilde
The best time to make friends is before you need them.
- Ethel Barrymore
Always do your best.
- don Miguel Ruiz
There are some things you learn best in calm,
and some in storm.
- Willa Cather
Whatever your work and whatever its worth,
No matter how strong or clever,
Some one will sneer if you pause to hear,
And scoff at your best endeavor.
For the target art has a broad expanse,
And wherever you chance to hit it,
Though close be your aim to the bull's-eye fame,
There are those who will never admit it.
- Ella Wheeler Wilcox
The best things in life are free.
- Anonymous
The Four Agreements
1.Be impeccable with your word.
2.Don't take anything personally.
3.Don't make assumptions.
4.Always do your best.
- don Miguel Ruiz
Things are never quite as scary when you've got a best friend.
- Bill Watterson
My dream is of a place and a time where America
will once again be seen as the last best hope of earth.
- Abraham Lincoln
I'm selfish, impatient and a little insecure.
I make mistakes, I am out of control
and at times hard to handle.
But if you can't handle me at my worst,
then you sure as hell don't deserve me at my best.
- Marilyn Monroe
The best way to get a bad law repealed
is to enforce it strictly.
- Abraham Lincoln
The best and most beautiful things in the world
cannot be seen or even touched.
They must be felt with the heart.
- Helen Keller
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May the world be kind to you,
and may your own thoughts be gentle upon yourself.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie
All materials & writings are copyright © Jonathan Lockwood Huie, except for quotes and other specifically identified material which belong to their respective copyright holders if applicable.