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Let these funny Block Quotes from my large collection of funny quotes about life add a little humor to your day.
A closed mind is like a closed book;
just a block of wood.
- Chinese proverb
The sculptor produces the beautiful statue
by chipping away such parts of the marble block as are not needed -
it is a process of elimination.
- Elbert Hubbard
Law and order exist for the purpose of establishing justice
and when they fail in this purpose
they become the dangerously structured dams
that block the flow of social progress.
- Martin Luther King, Jr.
What sculpture is to a block of marble,
education is to the soul.
- Joseph Addison
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He who can no longer pause to wonder
and stand rapt in awe,
is as good as dead;
his eyes are closed.
- Albert Einstein
The price of freedom for a nation is lives and money.
Often, the price of freedom for an individual
is challenging the closed minds of family and friend.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie
Be avid.
Create apart from perfection.
Risk failure.
Cover your words with sweat.
Run a little
Touch excruciatingly.
Laugh until you cry.
Dance with your eyes closed.
Care.
Understand you die a little in every moment.
Be Enlivened
- Mary Anne Radmacher
The worst prison would be a closed heart.
- Pope John Paul II
The time comes upon every public man
when it is best for him to keep his lips closed.
- Abraham Lincoln
When one door closes, another opens.
But often we look so long, so regretfully,
upon the closed door,
that we fail to see the one that is opened for us.
- Helen Keller
The most beautiful thing we can experience is the mysterious.
It is the source of all true art and all science.
He to whom this emotion is a stranger,
who can no longer pause to wonder and stand rapt in awe,
is as good as dead: his eyes are closed.
- Albert Einstein
The moment you become miserly you are closed
to the basic phenomenon of life: expansion, sharing.
The moment you start clinging to things,
you have missed the target.
Because things are not the target,
you, your innermost being, is the target -
not a beautiful house, but a beautiful you;
not much money, but a rich you;
not many things, but an open being,
available to millions of things.
- Osho
If I were to try to read, much less answer,
all the attacks made on me,
this shop might as well be closed for any other business.
- Abraham Lincoln
Be careful not to do your good deeds
when there's no one watching you.
- Tom Lehrer
No man is truly married until he understands
every word his wife is NOT saying.
- Anonymous
One cannot have everything the way he would like it.
A man has no business to be depressed by a disappointment,
anyway; he ought to make up his mind to get even.
- Mark Twain
Oh no, I can't do anything to the death.
Doctor's orders. You see, I have this ulcer condition,
and death is the worst thing for it.
- the movie Love and Death
No matter how much cats fight,
there always seem to be plenty of kittens.
- Abraham Lincoln
There's no reason to become alarmed,
and we hope you'll enjoy the rest of your flight.
By the way, is there anyone on board who knows how to fly a plane?
- the movie Airplane!
Fat, drunk, and stupid is no way to go through life, son.
- the movie National Lampoon's Animal House (1978)
No one knows what's next, but everybody does it.
- George Carlin
Mr. President, I'm not saying we wouldn't get our hair mussed.
But I do say no more than ten to twenty million killed, tops.
Uh, depending on the breaks.
- the movie Dr. Strangelove
And you just gotta remember, Sparky -
no matter what they tell you - you can NEVER have too much sugar.
- the movie Michael (1996)
A honeymoon should be like a table:
four bare legs and no drawers.
- Anonymous
No one can have a higher opinion of you than I have,
and I think you're a slimy, contemptible sewer rat!
- the movie The Great Mouse Detective
I have no fear of the gallows ... They're going to shoot me.
- the movie Love and Death
When I eventually met Mr. Right
I had no idea that his first name was Always.
- Rita Rudner
Television has a real problem. They have no page two.
- Art Buchwald
Marriage has no guarantees.
If that's what you're looking for,
go live with a car battery.
- Erma Bombeck
A man's friendships are, like his will,
invalidated by marriage -
but they are also no less invalidated
by the marriage of his friends.
- Samuel Butler
He who loves 50 people has 50 woes;
he who loves no one has no woes.
- The Buddha
I begin with the principle that all men are bores.
Surely no one will prove himself
so great a bore as to contradict me in this.
- Soren Kierkegaard
Some people are so heavenly minded
that they are no earthly good.
- Oliver Wendell Holmes, Jr.
No problem is so formidable that
you can't walk away from it.
- Charles M. Schulz' cartoon Peanuts
An excellent man;
he has no enemies;
and none of his friends like him.
- Oscar Wilde
The worst government is often the most moral.
One composed of cynics is often very tolerant and humane.
But when fanatics are on top there is no limit to oppression.
- H. L. Mencken
You have no values. With you its all nihilism,
cynicism, sarcasm, and orgasm.
- the Woody Allen movie Deconstructing Harry
Principles have no real force except when one is well-fed.
- Mark Twain
The universe we observe has precisely
the properties we should expect
if there is, at bottom, no design,
no purpose, no evil, no good,
nothing but blind, pitiless indifference.
- Charles Darwin
Some things will never seem adequate
no matter how hard we try.
- from the movie White Man's Burden
Faced with the choice between changing one's mind
and proving that there is no need to do so,
almost everyone gets busy on the proof.
- John Kenneth Galbraith
Science may have found a cure for most evils;
but it has found no remedy for the worst of them all -
the apathy of human beings.
- Helen Keller
There is no such thing as public opinion.
There is only published opinion.
- Winston Churchill
There is no pleasure in having nothing to do;
the fun is in having lots to do and not doing it.
- Mary Wilson Little
Random chance seems to have operated in our favor ...
there was no deity involved.
- Spock character in the Star Trek television series
Against logic there is no armor like ignorance.
- Laurence J. Peter
It is the things for which there is no evidence
that are believed with passion.
- Bertrand Russell
Clothes make the man.
Naked people have little or no influence on society.
- Mark Twain
I find that principles have no real force
except when one is well fed.
- Mark Twain
There is no sadder sight than a young pessimist.
- Mark Twain
I am no longer young enough to know everything.
- Oscar Wilde
I once had a rose named after me
and I was very flattered.
But I was not pleased to read
the description in the catalogue:
no good in a bed, but fine up against a wall.
- Eleanor Roosevelt
A clever man commits no minor blunders.
- Johann Wolfgang von Goethe
Early in life I had to choose between honest arrogance
and hypocritical humility.
I chose the former and have seen no reason to change.
- Frank Lloyd Wright
Less is only more where more is no good.
- Frank Lloyd Wright
In theory there is no difference between theory and practice.
In practice there is.
- Yogi Berra
The most difficult phase of life
is not when no one understands you,
it is when you don't understand yourself.
- Anonymous
There is no use whatsoever trying to help
people who do not help themselves.
You cannot push anyone up a ladder
unless he is willing to climb himself.
- Andrew Carnegie
Do not bite at the bait of pleasure,
till you know there is no hook beneath it.
- Thomas Jefferson
The fear of death is the most unjustified of all fears,
for there's no risk of accident for someone who's dead.
- Albert Einstein
Every one desires to live long,
but no one would be old.
- Abraham Lincoln
The way to silence religious disputes is to take no notice of them.
- Thomas Jefferson
He has no enemies, but is intensely disliked by his friends.
- Oscar Wilde
No one was ever named "Hero" for following the crowd.
Heroes set their own course.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie
Computers are like Old Testament gods;
lots of rules and no mercy.
- Joseph Campbell
The man who does not read good books
has no advantage over the man who cannot read them.
- Mark Twain
When all think alike, no one is thinking very much.
- Walter Lippmann
It has been my experience that folks who
have no vices, have very few virtues.
- Abraham Lincoln
If at first you don't succeed,
try, try, and try again.
Then give up.
There's no use being a damned fool about it.
- W. C. Fields
Experience keeps a dear school,
but fools will learn in no other.
- Benjamin Franklin
It's not the men in your life that counts,
it's the life in your men.
- Mae West, in the movie I'm No Angel
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May the world be kind to you,
and may your own thoughts be gentle upon yourself.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie
All materials & writings are copyright © Jonathan Lockwood Huie, except for quotes and other specifically identified material which belong to their respective copyright holders if applicable.