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Funny Quotes about Life
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Funny Bet Quotes
Funny Quotes about Bet

Let these funny Bet Quotes from my large collection of funny quotes about life add a little humor to your day.

Afraid? Me? A man who's licked
his weight in wild caterpillars?
Afraid? You bet I'm afraid!
- Groucho Marx

You might have seen a housefly, maybe even a superfly,
but I bet you ain't never seen a DONKEY fly!
- the movie Shrek (2001)

Let your sympathies and your compassion
be always with the under dog in the fight -
this is magnanimity;
but bet on the other one - this is business.
- Mark Twain

From one point of view, one individual's vote
doesn't make any difference whatsoever.
The probability of an election swinging
by a single vote is infinitesimal.
On the other hand, if everybody took the attitude
that voting didn't matter, there could never
be a democratically elected government - at all.
So, does your vote matter? You bet your vote matters.
And, at least as much as your vote matters,
your intention for the future of the world matters.
That's so important, it's worth saying again.
At Least As Much As Your Vote Matters,
Your Intention For The Future Of The Entire World Matters.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie


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Look at everything as though you were seeing it
either for the first or last time.
Then your time on earth will be filled with glory.
- Betty Smith

The worst part of success is to try to find
someone who is happy for you.
- Bette Midler

For my part, I consider that it will be found much better
by all parties to leave the past to history,
especially as I propose to write that history myself.
- Winston Churchill


 

The time-traveling is just too dangerous.
Better that I devote myself to study
the other great mystery of the universe - women!
- the movie Back to the Future II

I care not much for a man's religion
whose dog and cat are not the better for it.
- Abraham Lincoln

It is better to remain silent and be thought a fool,
than to speak and remove all doubt.
- sometimes attributed to Mark Twain, Abraham Lincoln, or Samuel Johnson

I think men who have a pierced ear
are better prepared for marriage.
They've experienced pain and bought jewelry.
- Rita Rudner

People living their lives for you on TV;
They say they're better than you, and you agree.
- Jewel

The only advantage of not being too good a housekeeper
is that your guests are so pleased
to feel how very much better they are.
- Eleanor Roosevelt

Really I feel less keen about the Army every day.
I think the Church would suit me better.
- Winston Churchill

I love to shop after a bad relationship.
I don't know. I buy a new outfit
and it makes me feel better. It just does.
Sometimes I see a really great outfit,
I'll break up with someone on purpose.
- Rita Rudner

Money can't buy friends
but it can get you a better class of enemy.
- Spike Milligan

The man who reads nothing at all
is better educated than the man who reads nothing but newspapers.
- Thomas Jefferson

Which form of proverb do you prefer
Better late than never, or Better never than late?
- Lewis Carroll

Money is better than poverty,
if only for financial reasons.
- Woody Allen

Today is probably a good day for something;
but it's a better day for doing nothing.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie

I always avoid prophesying beforehand,
because it is a much better policy to prophesy
after the event has already taken place.
- Winston Churchill

It's better to burn out, than to fade away.
- Neil Young

It is far better to be alone,
than to be in bad company.
- George Washington

As a cure for worrying,
work is better than whiskey.
- Ralph Waldo Emerson

Our faith gives us knowledge of something better.
- E. F. Schumacher

Anger? perhaps there is a better way.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie

It is better to light a candle than to curse the darkness.
- Chinese proverb often quoted by Eleanor Roosevelt

I believe that everything happens for a reason.
People change so that you can learn to let go,
things go wrong so that you appreciate them when they're right,
you believe lies so you eventually learn to trust no one but yourself,
and sometimes good things fall apart so better things can fall together.
- Marilyn Monroe

Because we believe that our ethnic group,
our society, our political party, our God,
is better than your God, we kill each other.
- Neale Donald Walsch

Better learn balance. Balance is key.
Balance good, karate good. Everything good.
Balance bad, better pack up, go home. Understand?
- Miyagi: character in the movie Karate Kid

Better learn balance. Balance is key.
- Miyagi: character in the movie Karate Kid

Why, I'd like nothing better than to achieve
some bold adventure, worthy of our trip.
- Aristophanes

Sometimes, indeed, there is such a discrepancy
between the genius and his human qualities
that one has to ask oneself whether
a little less talent might not have been better.
- Carl Jung

It is better to have loved and lost than never to have loved at all.
- Alfred Lord Tennyson

At the end of a matter ask,
"What will I learn from this to make me better?"
- Mary Anne Radmacher

I don't like that man.
I must get to know him better.
- Abraham Lincoln

Discretion is the better part of valor.
(originally "The better part of valor is discretion")
- William Shakespeare

A bad peace is better than a good war.
- Yiddish Proverb

To laugh often and much;
to win the respect of intelligent people
and the affection of children,
to leave the world a better place,
to know even one life has breathed easier
because you have lived,
this is to have succeeded.
- Ralph Waldo Emerson

How could youths better learn to live
than by at once trying the experiment of living?
- Henry David Thoreau

Maybe I could have loved you better.
Maybe you should have loved me more.
Maybe our hearts were just next in line.
Maybe everything breaks sometime.
- Jewel

The River of Life has no meaning,
no good, no bad, no better, no worse,
no love, no hate, no fear, no anger, no joy.
The River of Life has no judgment, no expectation.
The River of Life just IS.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie

The "stories" we choose to tell about our past
are never what a video camera would have recorded.
We can tell a sad story or a happy story,
and neither story is either
more accurate or "better" than the other story.
The difference is that one story causes us to suffer,
while the other brings us joy. I choose joy.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie

To give pleasure to a single heart by a single act
is better than a thousand heads bowing in prayer.
- Mohandas (Mahatma) Gandhi

Faith is much better than belief.
Belief is when someone else does the thinking.
- R. Buckminster Fuller

It is any day better to stand erect
with a broken and bandaged head
then to crawl on one's belly,
in order to be able to save one's head.
- Mohandas (Mahatma) Gandhi

It is better to displease the people
by doing what you know is right.
- William J. H. Boetcker

Vision stands on the shoulders of what is actual
to get a better view of what is possible.
- Mary Anne Radmacher

The world is a better place because I am here.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie

He who stops being better, stops being good.
- Oliver Cromwell

Ignorance and bungling with love
are better than wisdom and skill without.
- Henry David Thoreau

Build a better mousetrap
and the world will beat a path to your door.
- Ralph Waldo Emerson

Patience, persistence, and perseverance.
A little more each day, a little better each day.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie

Love is a better teacher than duty.
- Albert Einstein

Almost always, the creative dedicated minority
has made the world better.
- Martin Luther King, Jr.

If there is anything that we wish to change in the child,
we should first examine it and see whether it is
not something that could better be changed in ourselves.
- Carl Jung

Walking with a friend in the dark is better
than walking alone in the light.
- Helen Keller

Better late than never.
- Proverb

That you may retain your self-respect, it is better
to displease the people by doing what you know is right,
than to temporarily please them by doing what you know is wrong.
- William J. H. Boetcker

A "No" uttered from deepest conviction
is better and greater than a "Yes" merely uttered to please,
or what is worse, to avoid trouble.
- Mohandas (Mahatma) Gandhi

You have to learn the rules of the game.
And then you have to play better than anyone else.
- Albert Einstein

In the long run, men hit only what they aim at.
Therefore, they had better aim at something high.
- Henry David Thoreau

With realization of one's own potential and
self-confidence in one's ability,
one can build a better world.
- Tenzin Gyatso, the 14th Dalai Lama

It is always better to have no ideas than false ones;
to believe nothing, than to believe what is wrong.
- Thomas Jefferson

Well done is better than well said.
- Benjamin Franklin

Sometimes it is better to lose
and do the right thing
than to win and do the wrong thing.
- Tony Blair

Don't bother just to be better than
your contemporaries or predecessors.
Try to be better than yourself.
- William Faulkner

How many things there are concerning which we might
well deliberate whether we had better know them.
- Henry David Thoreau

We can never be the better for our religion
if our neighbor is the worse for it.
- Anonymous

I soothe my conscience now with the thought that
it is better for hard words to be on paper
than that Mummy should carry them in her heart.
- Anne Frank

It is better to be in chains with friends,
than to be in a garden with strangers.
- Persian Proverb


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May the world be kind to you,
and may your own thoughts be gentle upon yourself.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie


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All materials & writings are copyright © Jonathan Lockwood Huie, except for quotes and other specifically identified material which belong to their respective copyright holders if applicable.