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Let these funny Attacked Quotes from my large collection of funny quotes about life add a little humor to your day.
Naturally, the common people don't want war ...
but after all it is the leaders of a country who determine the policy,
and it is always a simple matter to drag the people along,
whether it is a democracy, or a fascist dictatorship,
or a parliament, or a communist dictatorship.
Voice or no voice, the people can always be brought
to the bidding of the leaders.
That is easy. All you have to do is tell them
they are being attacked,
and denounce the pacifists for lack of patriotism
and exposing the country to danger.
It works the same in every country.
- Hermann Goering
Life is a constant opponent,
and an overpowering adversary if attacked directly.
The successful and happy ones dance lightly with life -
a parry here, a feint there - always engaged,
but never in the direct line of life's heaviest blows.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie
Life is a game.
Keep it light and playful.
Tease life, taunt life,
never attack life head-on.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie
The great defense against the air menace
is to attack the enemy's aircraft
as near as possible to their point of departure.
- Winston Churchill
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The truth is incontrovertible,
malice may attack it, ignorance may deride it,
but in the end; there it is.
- Winston Churchill
When I am abroad, I always make it a rule never to
criticize or attack the government of my own country.
I make up for lost time when I come home.
- Winston Churchill
Love is of all passions the strongest,
for it attacks simultaneously the head,
the heart and the senses.
- Lao Tzu
If I were to try to read, much less answer,
all the attacks made on me,
this shop might as well be closed for any other business.
- Abraham Lincoln
In the world there is nothing more
submissive and weak than water.
Yet for attacking that which is hard and strong,
nothing can surpass it.
- Lao Tzu
We have to let go of all blame, all attacking, all judging,
to free our inner selves to attract what we say we want.
- Joe Vitale
Don't go around saying the world owes you a living;
the world owes you nothing; it was here first.
- Mark Twain
Tip the world over on its side and
everything loose will land in Los Angeles.
- Frank Lloyd Wright
Giving up smoking is the easiest thing in the world.
I know because I've done it thousands of times.
- Mark Twain
The world's mental.
- the movie Harry Potter and the Deathly Hallows
Half the world is composed of idiots,
the other half, of people clever enough
to take indecent advantage of them.
- Walter Kerr
We must become the change we wish to see in the world.
- Mohandas (Mahatma) Gandhi
My way of joking is telling the truth;
that is the funniest joke in the world.
- George Bernard Shaw
The hardest thing to understand in the world is the income tax.
- Albert Einstein
Let there be peace on earth.
And let it begin with me.
- Jill Jackson Miller
The problems of the world cannot possibly
be solved by skeptics or cynics
whose horizons are limited by the obvious realities.
We need men who can dream of things that never were.
- John F. Kennedy
Who in the world am I? Ah, that's the great puzzle.
- Lewis Carroll
The trouble with the world is not
that people know too little,
but that they know so many things that ain't so.
- Mark Twain
If the world was perfect, it wouldn't be.
- Yogi Berra
Give the right man two fishes and some bread,
and he will feed the world;
give the wrong man two fishes and some bread
and he will invent the fast-food fish sandwich.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie
What sane person could live in this world and not be crazy?
- Ursula K. Le Guin
The most difficult thing in the world
is to know how to do a thing
and to watch somebody else doing it wrong,
without comment.
- Theodore. H. White
I know that God made the whole world in 4004 BC.
I know because my preacher told me. He's a good man.
He's even saving up all the money we give him
to go to bible college someday.
- Anonymous Humor
The whole problem with the world is that
fools and fanatics are always so certain of themselves,
but wiser people so full of doubts.
- Bertrand Russell
I'm sure we all agree that we ought to love one another
and I know there are people in the world
that do not love their fellow human beings
and I HATE people like that.
- Tom Lehrer
The traveler sees what he sees,
the tourist sees what he has come to see.
- Gilbert K. Chesterton
There are a terrible lot of lies going about the world,
and the worst of it is that half of them are true.
- Winston Churchill
Twinkle, twinkle little bat
How I wonder what you're at!
Up above the world you fly,
Like a tea-tray in the sky.
- Lewis Carroll
Common looking people are the best in the world:
that is the reason the Lord makes so many of them.
- Abraham Lincoln
Powerful Dreams Inspire Powerful Action.
When you can taste, smell, and touch your dreams,
you can enroll the world.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie
The reason why the world lacks unity,
and lies broken and in heaps,
is, because man is disunited with himself.
- Ralph Waldo Emerson
It is said that the world is in a state of bankruptcy,
that the world owes the world more than the world can pay.
- Ralph Waldo Emerson
If we cannot now end our differences,
at least we can help make the world safe for diversity.
- John F. Kennedy
The Ought-To Need-To Tango:
I am racked with the guilt and the pain of I should,
and I ought, and I can't, but I must.
I can't rest; I can't sleep; I'm just not understood,
and I hate that the world is unjust.
I have work; I have woes; I have troubles for life;
but I don't have a ME that I trust.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie
What we think, we become.
All that we are arises with our thoughts.
With our thoughts, we make the world.
- The Buddha
Mind Chatter...
"I'm too fat; I'm too thin; and my hair is a fright;
And I'm never enough; and my world is not right;
I'm not smart; I'm not cute; I'm not strong; I'm a bust
I earn scorn; I earn hate; I'm no good; I disgust."
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie
Try a new perspective on diversity.
Across the country and around the world,
we are all one.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie
Just when the caterpillar thought
the world was over, it became a butterfly.
- Anonymous
Fear defeats more people than
any other one thing in the world.
- Ralph Waldo Emerson
Our honorable and worthy ancestors knew that the world was flat,
motionless, and the center of the universe.
They knew the human body could not withstand
the forces of traveling faster than 19 mph.
They knew that the way to salvation was
exorcising witches and slaying non-believers.
They knew that it was a mortal sin to marry
someone of a different skin color.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie
The hope of a secure and livable world
lies with disciplined nonconformists
who are dedicated to justice, peace and brotherhood.
- Martin Luther King, Jr.
If the Almighty were to rebuild the world and asked me for advice,
I would have English Channels round every country.
And the atmosphere would be such that
anything which attempted to fly would be set on fire.
- Winston Churchill
Soon we'll be out amid the cold world's strife.
Soon we'll be sliding down the razor blade of life.
But as we go our sordid sep'rate ways,
We shall ne'er forget thee, thou golden college days.
Hearts full of youth,
Hearts full of truth,
Six parts gin to one part vermouth.
- Tom Lehrer - song: Bright College Days,
album: An Evening Wasted With Tom Lehrer
A Single Generosity Enlarges the World.
- Mary Anne Radmacher
May the world be kind to you,
and may your own thoughts be gentle upon yourself.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie
Since boredom advances and boredom is the root of all evil,
no wonder, then, that the world goes backwards, that evil spreads.
This can be traced back to the very beginning of the world.
The gods were bored; therefore they created human beings.
- Soren Kierkegaard
I say NO to the demands of the world.
I say YES to the longings of my own heart.
There is nothing I ever need to have.
There is nothing I ever need to do.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie
By letting it go it all gets done.
The world is won by those who let it go.
But when you try and try.
The world is beyond the winning.
- Lao Tzu
I am not the same having seen the moon shine
on the other side of the world.
- Mary Anne Radmacher
Today is a day to honor other cultures.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie
Our loyalties must transcend our race, our tribe,
our class, and our nation;
and this means we must develop a world perspective.
- Martin Luther King, Jr.
The world is perfect. It's a mess.
It has always been a mess.
We are not going to change it.
Our job is to straighten out our own lives.
- Joseph Campbell
Choose the World You See,
and See the World You Choose.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie
Distance does not decide who is your brother and who is not.
- Bono
The true mystery of the world is the visible, not the invisible.
- Oscar Wilde
Say NO to the demands of the world.
Say YES to the longings of your own heart.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie
The cleansing fire of Spirit
consumes the troubles of this world.
Feed your concerns to the fire.
Breathe deeply and rejoice.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie
We may have different religions, different
languages, different colored skin,
but we all belong to one human race.
- Kofi Annan
We could never learn to be brave and patient,
if there were only joy in the world.
- Helen Keller
When all you know is bombs,
everything looks like a target.
Give peace and diplomacy a chance.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie
Globalization, as defined by rich people like us,
is a very nice thing...
you are talking about the Internet,
you are talking about cell phones,
you are talking about computers.
This doesn't affect two-thirds of the people of the world.
- Jimmy Carter
To laugh often and much;
to win the respect of intelligent people
and the affection of children,
to leave the world a better place,
to know even one life has breathed easier
because you have lived,
this is to have succeeded.
- Ralph Waldo Emerson
The world is more malleable than you think
and it's waiting for you to hammer it into shape.
- Bono
Misery nourishes your ego -
that's why you see so many miserable people in the world.
The basic, central point is the ego.
- Osho
The world is a mirror for anger,
which returns to its source as burning torment.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie
We have nowhere else to go... this is all we have.
- Margaret Mead
I find that he is happiest
of whom the world says least, good or bad.
- Thomas Jefferson
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May the world be kind to you,
and may your own thoughts be gentle upon yourself.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie
All materials & writings are copyright © Jonathan Lockwood Huie, except for quotes and other specifically identified material which belong to their respective copyright holders if applicable.