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Let these funny Arbitrary Quotes from my large collection of funny quotes about life add a little humor to your day.
Life is lived in the living.
Set aside convention, caution,
and arbitrary "rules" about how
life is supposed to be lived.
Choose! Explore! Adventure!
Live life to the fullest.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie
It is utterly false and cruelly arbitrary
to put all the play and learning into childhood,
all the work into middle age,
and all the regrets into old age.
- Margaret Mead
The greatest battle of all is simply... Life.
This is no child's game. This is the big one -
the Super Bowl - the Game of all games.
The rules of Life are unwritten and unknown.
Perhaps, one could say that there are no rules.
The Judge has ultimate power.
She can call the game at any time - for any reason.
The penalties in the Game are completely arbitrary -
in both timing and severity.
Penalty for what, we ask?
The Judge is silent.
How can I win the Game?
"You can never win," comes the answer,
"So just take pleasure in playing the Game."
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie
If we are to achieve a richer culture, rich in contrasting values,
we must recognize the whole gamut of human potentialities,
and so weave a less arbitrary social fabric,
one in which each diverse human gift will find a fitting place.
- Margaret Mead
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Life is like jumping out of an airplane without a parachute -
only the last couple seconds are fatal,
but most people are scared to death the whole way down.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie
Life is like a ten speed bicycle.
Most of us have gears we never use.
- Charles M. Schulz
Life ... full of loneliness, and misery,
and suffering, and unhappiness,
and it's all over much too quickly.
- the Woody Allen movie Annie Hall
Morality is simply the attitude we adopt
towards people whom we personally dislike.
- Oscar Wilde
The only fool bigger than the person who knows it all
is the person who argues with him.
- Stanislaw Jerszy Lec
Life's like Vegas. You're up, you're down,
but in the end the house always wins.
Doesn't mean you didn't have fun.
- the Woody Allen movie Deconstructing Harry
It ain't what you don't know that gets you into trouble.
It's what you know for sure that just ain't so.
- Mark Twain (attributed)
I love being married.
It's so great to find that one special person
you want to annoy for the rest of your life.
- Rita Rudner
The trick is growing up without growing old.
- Casey Stengel
One does not leave a convivial party before closing time.
- Winston Churchill
If life is a trial, who is the judge and jury?
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie
Life only
appears to be
rushing toward us
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie
To the young child, all life is a great adventure -
when did we grow so dull and brittle.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie
Life is defined more by its contrasts than its samenesses;
Life is defined more by its risks than the many securities.
- Mary Anne Radmacher
One man's remorse is another man's reminiscence.
- Ogden Nash
Life is always lived in the eye-of-the-storm
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie
Life is what happens to you while you're busy making other plans.
- John Lennon
Nothing so needs reforming as other people's habits.
- Mark Twain
The difference between school and life?
In school, you're taught a lesson and then given a test.
In life, you're given a test that teaches you a lesson.
- Tom Bodett
You can't make an omelet without breaking eggs.
- Anonymous
The most difficult phase of life
is not when no one understands you,
it is when you don't understand yourself.
- Anonymous
In the book of life, the answers aren't in the back.
- Charles M. Schulz in his Peanuts cartoon
We are all in the gutter, but some of us are looking at the stars.
- Oscar Wilde
Old age is fifteen years older than I am.
- Oliver Wendell Holmes, Jr.
Life is a journey - enjoy the journey.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie
Life is serious, get out your magic wand.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie
Live life on the edge, not with an edge.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie
No matter how much cats fight,
there always seem to be plenty of kittens.
- Abraham Lincoln
Life would be infinitely happier if we could only be born
at the age of eighty and gradually approach eighteen.
- Mark Twain
It is a truth universally acknowledged that
when one part of your life starts going okay,
another falls spectacularly to pieces.
- the movie Bridget Jones Diary
Any idiot can face a crisis.
It's the day-to-day living that wears you out.
- Anton Chekhov
Thousands of candles can be lit from a single candle,
and the life of the candle will not be shortened.
Happiness never decreases by being shared.
- The Buddha
Stay Happy, never let anyone get your goat.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie
You can observe a lot by just watching.
- Yogi Berra
The essence of all religions is one.
Only their approaches are different.
- Mohandas (Mahatma) Gandhi
It takes a big cat to be number 2.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie
The book of life is filled with incoherent riddles.
Life's true lessons are inscribed in a corner of the margin.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie
Persevere. Plan. Strategize. Focus. Breathe. Write.
Let go: relax. Forgive. All this failing: take a nap.
- Mary Anne Radmacher
The most powerful force in the universe is: gossip.
- Dave Barry
Time, like life itself, has no inherent meaning.
We give our own meaning to time as to life.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie
Iron rusts from disuse;
water loses its purity from stagnation...
even so does inaction sap the vigor of the mind.
- Leonardo da Vinci
We have a great life here in Alaska,
and we're never going back to America again!
- The Simpsons Movie (2007)
All diseases run into one - old age.
- Ralph Waldo Emerson
Life is as easy or as hard as you think it is.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie
Play with life, laugh with life,
dance lightly with life,
and smile at the riddles of life,
knowing that life's only true lessons
are writ small in the margin.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie
All people know the same truth.
Our lives consist of how we chose to distort it.
- the Woody Allen movie Deconstructing Harry
Do you feel stuck?
Whether in a project, a job, a relationship,
or some other situation,
there is a time for perseverance,
and a time for letting go and moving on.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie
Joy is a choice - but it isn't an easy choice.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie
You are Never Too Old to Give or Get Gold Stars.
Show Your Honest Appreciation - Today.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie
I have found that if you love life,
life will love you back.
- Arthur Rubinstein
Success is failure recycled.
Life is death reborn.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie
I can't go back to yesterday -
because I was a different person then.
- Lewis Carroll
It is hard enough to remember my opinions,
without also remembering my reasons for them!
- Friedrich Nietzsche
We make our friends; we make our enemies;
but God makes our next-door neighbor.
- Gilbert (G. K.) Chesterton
I don't believe in the after life,
although I am bringing a change of underwear.
- Woody Allen
Life is really simple,
but we insist on making it complicated.
- Confucius
Advice is what we ask for when we already know the answer
but wish we didn't.
- Erica Jong
Most men lead lives of quiet desperation
and go to the grave with the song still in them.
- Henry David Thoreau
She generally gave herself very good advice,
(though she very seldom followed it).
- Lewis Carroll
Life is not supposed to be fair.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie
Every man prefers belief to the exercise of judgment.
- Lucius Annaeus Seneca
Two things a man should never be angry at:
what he can help,
and what he cannot help.
- Thomas Fuller
Life is a reflection of intent.
Love reflects love.
Hate reflects hate.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie
Some things will never seem adequate
no matter how hard we try.
- from the movie White Man's Burden
A big part of letting go is recognizing
when it is time to stay in a situation
and when it is time to move on.
- Darren L. Johnson
Only a fool tests the depth of the water with both feet.
- African Proverb
I love and treasure individuals as I meet them;
I loathe and despise the groups
they identify with and belong to.
- George Carlin
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May the world be kind to you,
and may your own thoughts be gentle upon yourself.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie
All materials & writings are copyright © Jonathan Lockwood Huie, except for quotes and other specifically identified material which belong to their respective copyright holders if applicable.